


Broken but working

by nescamonster



Series: Dark FAKEAH UNIVERSE [2]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Bi-Polar, Blood and Torture, Blow Jobs, Broken, Canon-Typical Violence, Character Death, Depression, Dominance, Drugs, GTA AU, Gore, Gun Violence, Horror, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Injury, M/M, Mind Games, Murder, Other, Psychological Torture, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rough Sex, Serial Killers, Slave Trade, Sorry Not Sorry, Suicide, Torture, but kinda sorry, everyone is fucked up in some way
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-28
Updated: 2016-10-30
Packaged: 2018-08-18 07:22:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 30
Words: 158,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8153797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nescamonster/pseuds/nescamonster
Summary: FAKEAH are a group of disturbed people, each with their own uniqe sickness. When one of there own starts getting out of hand, their obsesion starting to affect the crew, how will they handle it? Ok can't say it enough, this is Dark. this was a little too hardcore for my other GTA AU collection. This one does have sex. Dark disturbing plot propelling sex but still. I guess trigger warning for non-con? basiclly don't read unless you like dark sick little puppy FAKEAH.I try to put little specific warning in the chapter notes at the top of each chapter so you can decide if you want to read it or not as we go.Read at your own choice.Enjoy or not as allways it's your choice here, i just write it, i don't make you read it.Someone brought to my attetion that Jack doesn't wish to be in anything with harm/Non con/Abuse so I did a massive rehaul of this work to change his character into and OC. so please keep that in mind while readingRL Jack is awesome so as sad as i am to lose the character of him, I must respect his wishesThe OC will be called Alex and be physically diffrent with work on personality tweaks trying not to disrupt Cannon





	1. Missing the Focus

**Author's Note:**

> so this begingin chapter is the same from the other collection but it is important for the story that it's here at the begining. Just for those who haven't read it already.  
> Jeremy feels something is missing and decides to shadow ryan in the hope that maybe he'll find what makes Ryan so happy

Jeremy watched Ryan work. The man was undoubtedly an artist, one torturer leading perfectly into the next. He at times berated, cajoled or begged as needed. One hand gave pain as the other gave comfort. Jeremy liked to stand in the corner, at Ryan’s insistence just enough to one side so the victim had to turn their head to see him fully. To be tortured by Ryan was to be the sole focus of his world.

But always they would come to the same finish. For whatever reason, if Geoff had decided that the victim could not live to tell this tale, then came the part that fascinated Jeremy. The method varied but the result was always the same. This latest one was as intimate a time as any. Bruised, battered and broken, they begged for him like they always did at the end. Jeremy sucked in a breath as Ryan looked up over their prisoners shoulder to meet Jeremy’s eyes.

The blue in the mask shone bright as Ryan reached up and pulled the plastic from his face. His eyes were still the most haunting feature, highlighted in Black. Jeremy stood up from where he leant on the wall, knowing it was coming. Ryan paced around to the front of his victim, trading up pliers for his personal hunting knife. With a gentle hand he hushed the vague sobbing coming from the bound victim, lovingly stroking the mangled face.

He came forward and sat on their lap, shushing the pained cry as his weight settled on broken thighs. Ryan allowed his victim time to breathe through the pain, gently guiding their head to rest on his chest. He patted their hair and murmured soothingly, his eyes caught by Jeremy who was subtly shifting to get a better view.

“It’s ok. Shhhh. You did so well. So well. So good for me huh?” Ryan was saying as the prisoner cried hopelessly into his bloodstained shirt. Sometimes Ryan took his time. Sometimes he was quick. Sometimes he was mean and sometimes, like now, he was almost lover level of kind. Ryan pulled his eyes from Jeremy who watched in fascination.

“Hey now, look at me. Look.” He commanded softly, helping guide the prisoners eyes to his. He smiled and it darn near broke Jeremy’s heart to see the tender Ryan he knew atop a man that Ryan had pulled apart. The Victim was likewise affected, fresh sobs breaking out but not allowed to break eye contact.

“Shh. I am just a man. I am just a human being. Just like you. There is no Demon, no Monster. Just me. And just you.” Jeremy was ignored but he didn’t mind. Ryan was treating him to a special show. He didn’t know why but he was trying to capture everything in his mind.

“I’ll make the pain stop for you.” Ryan promised and a tattered voice croaked out so faintly, Jeremy had to take a step forward to catch it.

“You will?”

Ryan smiled that heart breaking smile, actual tears welling in his eyes.

“Of course. For you.” He whispered and slid his knife home into his prisoners heart. Then in a practised move, identical to however he finished them, he fisted the hair behind their head, leaning in close, eyes darting between his victims pupils, searching, searching.

It was a quiet almost gentle death and after a moment Ryan sighed, shuffling back and off, letting the corpse head go to slump over their chest. He pulled the knife and moved to wipe it clean with the water boarding rag. Jeremy came over quietly, feeling the need to be silent and respectful. He looked down at the body and with sure hands, lifted the face up to look for himself into those eyes.

Empty.

He looked up to see Ryan staring at him, his knife still in hand. Jeremy let the head flop forward once more and backed up two steps. Ryan strode towards him purposely and unease flooded the youngest crewman as he was backed up against a wall.

“Why are you here Jeremy?” Ryan asked suddenly, his face the mild curious of a boy with a magnifying glass. Jeremy felt very much the ant as those cold blue eyes caught brown.

“Why do you watch me all the time huh? Mr squeamish Jeremy. ‘Oh no, torture is so wrong, so bad’” he mocked Lil’J who didn’t dare defend himself as Ryan’s free hand came up to lean against the wall, just above his shoulder. The knife trailed up the soft skin on his arm and he gulped as suddenly he felt as if he was the sole and only focus of Ryan’s world.

“Lil’J. Did Geoff ask you to keep an eye on me? Did Alex?” he asked softly and tilted his head, eyes narrowing just slightly when Jeremy jerked his head in negative.

“What’s the matter? Edgar got your tongue?” He asked even softer as the knife caressed Jeremy’s jaw line, the heart blood leaving a sticky trail in his trimmed beard.

“R-Ryan. W-hat are you d-doing?” he stuttered out as the knife left his cheek and ran down the front of his shirt, gliding down between his Pecs until it rested in his belly button.

“Never mind that. Tell me why the sudden interest in my job? This is the ninth person you’ve watched me dispatch. Why?” Jeremy forced himself to swallow as Ryan hit the wall with his fist as he asked his last question, Ryan’s tone however not altering from the pleasant conversationalist. Jeremy tried to speak but all that came out was a soft jumble of words. Ryan’s face turned hard for a flash then gentled again.

“Try that again?” he encouraged and Jeremy swallowed his trepidation of the larger man looming over him so he could concentrate on the answer.

“I want to know what you see.” He managed without a single stutter, careful to pronounce each word carefully and slowly. Ryan smiled and suddenly Jeremy could breathe again as the knife tip disappeared. Ryan took a step back and opened his arms, the knife, disturbingly absent.

“Lil’J why didn’t you just ask? Here, come look.” He enthused and put an arm around the still trembling sniper. The corpse would have to be moved soon to avoid stiffening into the shape of the chair but for now was still freshly limber. Ryan picked up the head by the hair once more, drawing Jeremy’s attention to the glassed out eyes.

“What do you see?” Ryan asked his voice deep and dulcet.

“I- Nothing. I see nothing. Just dead eyes.” Jeremy said a little confused and still a bit on edge. Ryan tapped his own nose with his free finger and his grin widened.

“Ah, but do you remember? Just before I broke their heart?” he paused and sighed as Jeremy looked at him blank. Even in death the body got no respect, head falling forward for a third time so Ryan could clasp his hands on Jeremy’s cheeks, his palms still sticky from blood.

“I look into your eye’s Jeremy and they are just like theirs had been,” he dipped his chin at the corpse without looking away from Jeremy, “So alive. Moving, searching, thinking. Full of pain, of hope of despair. I can look into someone’s eyes and know what their thinking. It’s all written there plain to see.” Ryan’s face was drawing closer as he lectured until the gents lips were close enough to Jeremy’s that he felt the warmth from them. Ryan paused and Jeremy wondered what was going to happen.

Blue filled his vision and he didn’t know how he would feel if Ryan closed that tiny distance between them. He had the outrageous and crazy idea that perhaps he should. Just as Jeremy sucked in a breath, steeling himself for that last half inch, Ryan pulled back looking back and forth between Jeremy’s eye’s. Lil’J flushed as Ryan gave him a knowing look, a thumb brushing his cheek affectionately.

“Plain to see Jeremy. In the eyes.” He murmured softly. Then Ryan took his hands from Jeremy’s face, the heat of them burnt into the young man’s skin. One hand on his hip, Ryan waved a hand at the corpse as if it had irritated him.

“But that now? Nothing. Empty. All gone.” He huffed and looked back to Jeremy who realised he was swaying slightly, his body a tingle. He managed to bring focus back to Ryan, that easy smile parting over white teeth.

“Little Jeremy. I see the moment the board is wiped clean. The very instant when it all fades. And to be the one holding the eraser? That’s a pretty good feeling.” He said and too Jeremy it seemed there was an energy to Ryan that he had never experienced for himself. Sure he had killed but never as intimately and as personally as Ryan does. Looking at the glowing face of the gent and seeing the rush first hand, listening to the reasoning behind it filling little J with a longing he never recognised before.

“Can you show me?” He asked, voice hitching with excitement and Ryan nodded. He never took his eyes off Jeremy’s face as he stepped back towards the door and lifted a fist.

“Oh yeah. Let me show you the world Jeremy. I’d love too.” Ryan assured him then slammed his raised fist into the door twice. The electricity Jeremy felt between them snapped when Ryan opened the door and stuck his head out.

“Hey kids, wanna see a dead body?!” he called, clean-up crew inbound. The door came wide and as Trevor and Michael came in, Jeremy found Ryan looking at him once more. He knew the next one, he wouldn’t just be watching.

An unidentified shiver ran up his spine at the thought.


	2. temptation Via Text

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy gets the message he had been waiting for

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is just a little set up, just a small enticment to the main event.  
> Enjoy... Mhahaha

-Author note: Alex Stanley is my work around for Jack respecting Jacks wishes not to be in such dark stories. He’s of average height, green eyed and mildly tattooed over mocha skin. He has brown hair and a goatee style beard and is roughly looking around early thirties in age-

* * *

 

Gavin was laying upside down on the couch, legs over the back and head brushing the floor. There was an Xbox remote in his hands and he was playing a one on one game with Alex while Jeremy watched, laughing from beside Gavin’s long legs. His phone vibrated and still chuckling at the other two’s antics, he checked it and instantly felt cold followed by warm run through him.

_V: Want to see my world?_

A text from Ryan out of the blue. Alex gave him a strange look as Jeremy realised his breathing had sped up and he shifted on the couch, his skin starting to prickle. He tried to calm himself and gave Alex a reassuring smile, settling deeper into the couch as if he wasn’t going to move anytime soon. Alex looked back to the screen as his turn came about and Jeremy took the chance to text back.

_J: I’m with Al and Gav gimme some time to slip out?_

The response was quick and Jeremy knew Ryan was on edge, six weeks since his last kill.

_V: Hurry I’m not letting this one go_

Everyone in the crew knew Ryan needed a kill at least once a month but this dry spell was unavoidable. After their rivals, had found the mangled remains of their man, they hadn’t turned tail an ran like Geoff had expected. They had instead allied with two other gangs and were putting the pressure back on FAKEAH. The Boss wasn’t too worried about it, working on something special to get rid of the threat. In the meantime, they had been told to keep their heads low.

No longer it seems.

Jeremy gave himself ten minutes before as casually as he could, he got up about to move away.

“What you up to?” Alex asked, his tone just this side of pointed. Jeremy tried not to look shifty as he shrugged.

“Oh you know, gonna go out for a bit.”

“yeah? Where too?”

“Ahh, get food. Got hunkering for a hamburger.” He laughed and patted his stomach. Too his dismay, Alex paused the game and fixed Jeremy with one of his trademark stares that made men spill their guts. Gavin looked between the two then rolled, falling to the floor all legs as he up righted himself.

“Ok, what am I missing? Lil’J got a new girl or something?” He asked and Alex nodded slowly, arms folding.

“Or something.” Alex said and Jeremy knew he was busted, kicking his feet in disappointment as Alex gave a sigh and stood up, gesturing for Jeremy to follow him.

“I’ll just stay here then?” Gavin asked irritated at being left out, shaking his head and throwing himself onto the couch properly, cueing up halo for himself and muttering. Alex led Jeremy into the heist room and Jeremy ignored the text that buzzed as Alex told him to take a seat. Jeremy sat in the only chair, feeling very much like he was in the principal’s office.

“So I don’t know if you knew this, but Geoff and I are not idiots.” Alex said sternly as Jeremy hung his head, hands clasped between his knees.

“We know you’ve been watching Ryan work and you’ve volunteered for clean up the past like fourteen times.” Jeremy didn’t say anything but his phone was burning a hole in his pocket as it buzzed again. He didn’t dare check it with Alex standing above him working himself into a lecture.

“Jeremy, you’re not the first you know.” Alex said and the short sniper looked up at that, confused. Alex smiled kindly at him and nodded.

“Oh yeah. You’re not the first Ryan has tempted down the rabbit hole. I had a look myself, just a small little peek.” He admitted and Jeremy straightened, eyes burning with curiosity.

“Well? What did he show you? How was it?” He asked and Alex looked away, patting his goatee to reassure himself, considering the answer.

“Intense.” He finally settled on then looked back to Jeremy, “Really fucking intense. And Ryan...Isn’t quite Ryan. Michael took a trip with him too and he really said it when he came home. Ryan gets death drunk.” At Jeremy’s slightly alarmed face Alex put up his hands to soothe him.

“No, it’s ok. We love Ryan just the same you know. Whatever he likes is what he likes and we try to keep him sated. Michael has even gone back for the very occasional seconds. But I just wanted to warn you before you got gallivanting off to understand how deep you can go.” Jeremy sat back stunned at what he was hearing.

“You’re going to let me go?” Another buzz followed immediately by a second.

“Just keep your phone handy and me on speed dial ok? Text me where he takes you and if he gets pissy about that then leave.” Alex warned his voice dark and Jeremy cocked his head.

“Ryan wouldn’t hurt me, would he?” He asked and Alex sighed giving a tiny twitch of his lips in what may have been a smile.

“Only if you ask nicely. No Lil’J just me being careful because like I said. It’s intense.” Alex nodded his head at Jeremy’s pocket and the sniper pulled it free to check messages.

_V: J I can’t wait to much longer_

_V: I got a present for you_

_V: Isn’t it the best?_

There was a photo attached to the last of a man unconscious on a bed. They seemed asleep and unaware of the different shiny objects circled around their form. Knives and lighters and blunt objects.

Jeremy gasped and Alex looked over his shoulder with a frown. He put a hand on Jeremy’s shoulder and sighed out a breath.

“You sure you want to go?” he asked and Jeremy wondered at his own conviction.

“Yes.” His voice rung with it and he felt as if something inside him was being called to the surface. Something Ryan knew about but Jeremy wasn’t sure had existed until he had felt the tip of Ryan’s knife caress his face and that dulcet voice ask him if he wanted to see. Alex squeezed his shoulder and nodded.

“All right, but on consideration I’m coming with you.” He said and Jeremy looked up to Alex who looked down at his seriously.

“I tried to tell Geoff Ryan was getting antsy. But Geoff’s been so focused on his plans he brushed it off. Now look. No this is gonna be bad and if you want to go then I’m going with you to make sure both of you stay in control.” Alex picked Jeremy’s phone out of the younger mans hands, Jeremy wondering just what was going to happen as Alex texted from his phone and got a quick reply. He then motioned to Jeremy to get up and follow him.

The gent handed Jeremy his phone back as Alex opened his own.

“We’re going out gav don’t wait up!”

“yeah sure I’ll just stay here and twiddle my knob then huh?” Gavin snapped, hurt at being excluded and Alex stopped to widen his arms in defence.

“You wanna come watch the Ryan show?”

“Oh that’s what you’re doing?” the hurt leaked out of his voice and Gavin was his normal self once more waving a hand at them, shooing them out, “Nope, I’m good right here. Good luck with that.” He said with a slight shudder that had Jeremy raise a brow but follow Alex into the hall.

“Hey Geoff, I told you so.” Alex started in on a phone call, informing Geoff what was going on and where they were going. As he did so Jeremy checked his phone as it buzzed once more, the first message was the one Jack had sent.

_J: Alex here, I’m driving J need address_

_V: -address- gonna watch the show too huh?_

_V: How far you out? I’m ready to get started here, might play without you guys_

Another picture, now the unconscious man had a sheet over his waist and he was topless, his chest bare of any hair, a shaving cream and a razor resting on his stomach. His hands had been expertly bound together and above his head. He still looked unconscious but Jeremy felt that new and pleasant tingle over his skin as he realised why Ryan had shaved the victim.

All that exposed and pure flesh.

He all but threw himself into the seat, bouncing with growing excitement as Alex rounded off his call too Geoff and put his car in drive.

“Anxious?” Alex asked and Jeremy answered in that new tone of voice that Ryan pulled from him.

“Interested.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter is going to be LONG because i had no idea where to cut it and it kinda felt like it needed to be all together anyway. So warning you here, torture swift aproaching, gonna be bad.  
> You were warned  
> comments and Kudos always apreicated :)


	3. Self discovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan brings Jeremy into his kingdom, Jeremy decided how he feels about this new world and discovers something new inside him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Torture both mental and physical. Mind games etc, don't read if Blood, torture, begging and brainwashing isn't your thing. If it is then Strap in and enjoy!

The address was for a tiny house out in the middle of nowhere between sandy shores and Los Santos. One of Ryan’s little pleasure get a way’s. The plants were well maintained around the front and he kept the place stocked full of food, weapons and clothing. This place doubled as a safe house but the real treasure was downstairs.

Ryan had used private contracts, changing up with each new feature, careful to use people that could disappear easily. The result was a completely sound proof basement room. There were indents everywhere for a changeable environment. Bars and poles, hooks and pullies. Anything he needed all tucked away. This was different from Vagabonds Hole.

Vagabonds Hole was for especially naughty people. Extended stays.

This room. This was for fun. It was a great room when he liked to show off. And he did like to show off.

He bounced on his heels waiting for either Jeremy and Alex to arrive or his new friend to wake up.

Alex had insisted that he would accompany Jeremy, making sure Ryan didn’t throw the young man into the deep end. Ryan admitted that he had pushed Gavin too far too quickly but Michael very occasionally liked to visit. He wished Alex would give him more trust but the older gent had taken a peek in the rabbit hole himself and perhaps knew better how caught up Ryan could get. Sometimes he got carried away and maybe it was better for Lil’J if a sober adult was around.

To get Death drunk was a heady experience.

He had everything ready, a king-sized bed, the mattress comfortable and the sheets silk. As he paced impatiently he looked to the man bound on the bed. With a frown, he approached, deciding to change up the bindings since it was little J’s first time here.

He put cuffs around wrists and linked them to a chain that he ran through an embedded steel bar above the bed frame. He pulled the chain tight so that his prisoners wrists were dangling just slightly, unable to fully rest on the mattress. As he did so, the man gave a little groan, starting to blink as the drugs faded from his system. Ryan slide quickly off the bed and walked around so he was out of immediate sight, ready to watch the show. Lights were off except for a single dim one eliminating just the area of the bed around the man who started to twist, confusion on his face.

Ryan lifted his phone hitting record.

“Wha-? Where?” the man muttered and his attention caught on his bound wrists. He gave an experimental tug that did nothing but hurt his wrists, metal cutting him. He wriggled back so he could sit up, chest starting to heave with fear as his eyes tried to cut through the dark. Ryan knew it was futile, that all that his prisoner would see beyond the light provided was black.

“Hello? Hello?” the man started to call and Ryan bit back a snigger. Why do they always call out? they awake in some sort of binding and no memory how they got there. Did they expect a friendly face?

“Is anyone there? Hello?” His voice was rising and the prisoner tried to yank on the chain with both hands to no avail.

“Hello?! Why am I here!” he started to yell, fear making him angry. Ryan grinned. He knew he had picked a good one. Fighters were full of passion just ready to be snuffed out. He hit stop and sent the recording to Jeremy, hoping to hurry them along. He leant back and watched as his prisoner tested the limits of his world, twisting and stretching, grunting as he tried to break free.

Little J and Alex had to get here soon or Ryan would start without them.

There was a knock at the top of the stairs making the prisoner still. He was kneeling now, only in boxers, hands twisted around the chain as if that would give him more leverage to rip a solid rebar from a cement wall.

“H-Hello?! I’m down here! I’m trapped! Help me!” The door opened and hesitant steps came down. Ryan pressed himself deeper into shadow, curious as to what Jeremy would do as the man himself came into the light.

“Who are you? Are you the one who put me here?” demanded the prisoner and Ryan cocked his head in the dark waiting for Jeremy’s answer. Jeremy eyed the man over, his face redding by the moment. He wet his lips and started to look about presumably for Ryan.

“N-no. I didn’t put you here.” He said as he looked about. Ryan saw him shoot a puzzled look at the bed which was clear of the tools that had been in the last two photo’s. Ryan had put them to the side before his victim awoke.

“Who are you then? Can you help me? Find a key or something!” the victim asked and jangled his wrists. Jeremy’s breath was becoming more ragged by the minute and he took a step back, almost out of the small circle of light with his hands up.

“Oh no. I can’t. Didn’t he- Haven’t you seen anyone yet?”

“Seen anyone?! I just woke up in a god dam sex dungeon! If you’re not the asshole behind it then I’d like to fucking leave before they do show up!” Jeremy backed up a bit more as the prisoner shouted and the man instantly changed tacks, settling down on the bed and giving the best puppy dog eyed look Ryan had seen in quite awhile.

He knew this one would be good.

“Please, I’m sorry I yelled. Are you a prisoner too? Help me. Whoever this jerk is, we can fight him together. Please.” His soft voice coaxed Jeremy back towards the bed, eyes darting everywhere for Ryan.

“Please, my names Brian. What’s yours?” Ryan frowned and his eye twitched. He didn’t like the victim naming himself. Jeremy gave another anxious look around and Ryan saw his hand drop to his pocket where he kept his phone.

“I don’t know if I should be talking to you.” He said slowly, another glance about. Brian shook his head and gestured about with his bound hands.

“No one’s here. Just you and me.” Ryan saw a shiver run down Jeremy’s spine at those words, the same one’s Ryan liked to use at the end. Jeremy seemed to solidify before both their eye’s, his face becoming a hard smile and his hands becoming firm as he slipped a hand into his pocket.

“Your right. Just you and me. But gimme a second and I’ll give someone a quick text.”

“Text? You got a phone? Call the police or something!” Begged Brian but Lil’J put up a finger and sent a quick text. Ryan felt his phone buzz and he gave a deep satisfied laugh, clapping his hands and stepping into the light, both men looking up at the sound.

“Very, very good. Very good. For a moment, I thought you might actually have set him free.” He chuckled again as Brian whipped his head between the two putting his back up against the bed frame.

“R-Ryan! I didn’t see you!” Jeremy said nervously, unsure if he had done right. Ryan lifted a finger much as Jeremy had moments before and checked his message.

_Guys awake. Where are you? What do I do?_

He huffed and shook his head.

“What’s going on?! Are you in this together? What do you want from me?” Brian commanded answers from the two who were around the bed. Ryan was maskless, his face kind as he turned from Jeremy too the prisoner.

“Hush, Edgar. I’ll be with you in just a minute.” He said and walked around the bed too Jeremy as Brian got angry.

“My name is Brian!” he shouted desperately and Ryan ignored him to whisper in Jeremy’s ear.

“Where’s Al?” he asked and Jeremy looked up briefly in answer, he felt Ryan brush over his shoulder, the gents hand settling on his hip. Ryan brought his lips back to Jeremy’s ear.

“Do you mind sitting back just to begin with? Just watch me and you’ll get the idea. If you feel like you want to join, tap the bedpost and I’ll find a spot for ya.” Ryan moved back to meet Jeremy’s eyes waiting until he saw understanding in them. He smiled and patted Jeremy’s cheek fondly then turned to his victim.

“What the fuck do you want from me?!” he spat and Ryan shed his jacket, standing in just a worn old pair of jeans and his comfortable short sleeved T-shirt.

“Edgar, Edgar, Edgar. I want may things from you but we’ll start at the beginning.” He sighed out and gestured to himself, then Jeremy as he spoke, “I am your king and this is my loyal subject and apprentice. Edgar, you shall address me as Your majesty or Sire. You shall call My Subject Sir.”

The prisoner looked between them, drawing himself into a defensive ball by the head of the bed, fury on his face.

“Fuck you sicko’s! I ain’t calling you shit! And my names Fucking Brian!” His anger became fear as Ryan lunged forward, his larger body pressed against leg and side, his face at the victim’s ear, lips almost touching. His hands were on either side of the prisoner’s face, trapping him between them.

“Brian huh? Is that the name you want me to call you? Brian...” he turned the name into a caress, his nose tracing down the man’s neck to his shoulder then back again.

“I can moan Brian too you if you wish. If that’s what you want. Is it Edgar? Or is it Brian? Your choice.” His words were thick and the prisoner shuddered, helpless and trapped. He looked up to Jeremy who had leant against the wall near the head of the bed, eyes wide and mouth slightly open, breath coming in fast as he watched.

This was a side of Ryan he had not seen. If before in official business, Ryan made the interviewee the centre of his world, now, here, this man was the centre of the universe. Jeremy was discovering new things about himself as he watched Ryan corner this man like a mouse. Ryan was all predator and Jeremy had to shift as he felt himself respond to Ryan even without the words even being directed at him.

“E-Edgar.” The prisoner said quietly, and Ryan pressed a kiss into that long exposed throat getting another delicious shudder from his prize.

“Atta boy.” He said happily and pulled himself away from the cowered man. Jeremy tilted his head, curious when he saw Edgar’s eyes start to tear up. He wondered quietly to himself, amazed at how quickly Ryan had got this man to change his name. He hadn’t even started to hurt him yet. Ryan was humming cheerfully in the dark.

“Ok Edgar, we’ll start you out slow alright? Ease you into this.” His voice came over the sound of items being sorted through. Edgar looked up to Jeremy.

“Please. Please let me go.” He begged softly, hands clasped together around his chain like a prayer. Jeremy leant forward, Edgar moving his head back as Jeremy got into his space, staring him dead centre in the eyes. Too Jeremy, he was searching for something. But all he saw was hazel.

Jeremy flinched back as Edgar cried out, the slap of flesh ringing in the room. Ryan hefted the paddle he had in hand and brought it down on Edgar’s shoulders again. Then he was on the bed, a handful of hair, pulling Edgars head back painfully, his blue eyes on Jeremy who had backed up.

“Naughty Subject. Didn’t I say knock?” he demanded and Jeremy started to back up but paused at Ryan’s commanding gesture. He made sure Jeremy was still and pressed his lips to Edgars ear.

“And you. What did I say? You address him as Sir.” Edgar choked on a cry, trying to nod his head but caught in that vice grip. Ryan growled pulling tighter on his victim’s hair.

“Use your words. Speak.”

“Yes!”

“Yes what?”

“Yes sire!” Ryan let the head go and Edgar flinched away from him. Anger clearly coursing through his body at having to submit like that. Both men ignored him, Ryan pointing the paddle at Jeremy who quailed under the look he was given.

“Obey.” Ryan warned and Jeremy nodded then shyly raised a hand halfway up. Ryan relaxed and dropped the paddle, shimming back off the bed and coming around to Jeremy once more. He pressed Jeremy back into the dark where they were simple silhouettes to the prisoner trying to keep them in focus.

“What?” Ryan asked, once again crowding into Jeremy’s personal space and speaking quietly.

“I’m sorry I was just trying to see what you see.” Jeremy explained and grinned.

“So anxious...You’re a sniper Jeremy. Your used to focusing on things further away. You have to watch close. The first time is hardest to see it but you will. I’m sure. Just let me get him all sparked up for you. He’ll shine bright for us don’t worry.” He cranked his head back towards the bed with a smile.

“look, even now he’s only pretending to submit. It hasn’t sunk in deep. He’s watching, waiting, planning. Hiding that light.” Ryan patted Jeremy’s arm then drew him close back to their toy.

“I’ll get the light out, don’t worry.” Ryan assured him, his voice carrying to Edgar who had been fiddling with his cuffs, stilling his twisting wrists. Ryan now stood and with the paddle gestured lengthways on the bed.

“Lay on your stomach.” He commanded and Edgar’s face drained of colour.

“Why?” He asked quickly then winced as Ryan brought the paddle down on his upper arm.

“Stomach, now.”

“No.” Edgar spat eyes desperately wide as he curled up tighter. Two hits with the paddle, leaving large red marks where they landed.

“Stomach, now, or I get mean.” Ryan warned and Edgar swallowed hard looking between these two men watching him with serious expressions.

“Why, Sire?” He bit out forcing himself to bow his head. Ryan shot Jeremy a quick eye roll knowing that Edgar was just trying to manipulate him by playing along. Ryan looked back to Edgar and twirled the paddle in his hand.

“The hits stop when you’re on your stomach like a good Edgar.” Jeremy wanted to question Ryan with a look, not daring to speak but before he could, Ryan was raining down blows onto every inch of exposed skin. Edgar yelped and cried out curling tighter and tucking his head as his arms, legs and shoulders were brutalised by the wicked black paddle, the slap of it hitting flesh almost drowning out his cries.

Ryan was laughing manically as he brought his arm up and down, hard full body strength hits.

“that’s it Edgar, sing for us! Such a beautiful song! Stomach Edgar and I’ll stop!” he yelled out and Edgar shook hard as the bruising blows kept falling.

“Stop! Stop!” he cried out but Ryan just laughed more.

“On your stomach Edgar.” He answered and Edgar scurried to his stomach, doing it as quickly as possible to minimise the time more flesh was exposed. The moment he had begun to shift, Ryan stilled the assault, letting the paddle drop from his hand as he caught his breath. The exertion had made his arm tremble but it was worth it for this obedience.

He caught Jeremy’s eye and gestured him close. Together they got onto the bed and Edgar shuddered, breath hitching as the man sobbed quietly. Ryan drew Jeremy’s attention to the red and black marks down the downy sides of Edgars thighs. Jeremy felt his hand tingle and he felt the need to trace one, letting his finger hover above it awaiting Ryan’s permission which he received. Muscle twitched as he traced the raised welt, bruising already welling under the swollen skin.

Ryan drew his attention to another welt, this one across Edgars shoulders, skin actually split. Blood beaded up and Ryan locked eyes with Jeremy as he leant forward and licked it away. Edgar bucked beneath them and Ryan grabbed the back of his neck with a hard grip, shoving the face down into the mattress.

“Edgar, stay still.” He ordered then motioned for Jeremy to touch another mark as he continued to soothe their victim.

“We are just looking, calm down.” He said with a huff and an eye roll. Jeremy explored Edgars body, with fingers and eye’s amazed at how quickly the pattern of his skin had changed from smooth and pink to raised red and black. He looked back up at Ryan, eyes shining in a dangerously tempting way to the gent. Instinctively he knew how to address Ryan appropriately, the words no act from his lips.

“Sire, is that what you meant?” he asked and Ryan nodded. Jeremy moved closer to Edgars face, wanting to see his eyes but Ryan leant across the body between them to place a hand on Jeremy’s chest.

“No, not yet. It wouldn’t be there quite so soon.” He said and Jeremy sat back onto his heels, disappointed. Ryan smiled and winked at him.

“Patience, patience.” He said and got off the bed to inspect his tools.

Jeremy felt strange. He almost felt as if his self, the person who he was, had been backed out into a corner of his mind. Intense, Alex had called it. Jeremy understood that now. With just his voice and his domineering stance, Ryan had chased normal, silly, fun Jeremy away to make room for something more. A darker, harder, more malicious Jeremy. One who was fascinated by the artist as he painted his blank slate in pain and confusion.

Was this why Ryan wore the mask? To separate this maddened king persona from the rest of his life?

They all knew Ryan had two personalities. So what? They we’re all fucked up in some way. All broken shells of human beings. Jeremy himself had dark corners of his mind. But now he wondered if he was fascinated by Ryan because he was more similar then they thought.

Jeremy loved to fool people. Loved to put on a face and act for the room, no one ever seeing the real person that lived inside him. He was a performer and this was the ultimate performance. He just didn’t know who it was for.

Ryan returned with two items. One was a bottle of moisturiser, the other a paint scraped. Jeremy was intrigued by the mystery as Ryan climbed up and onto Edgar, settling his weight on Edgars ass with knees on either side. Jeremy caught his breath and had remind himself to let it out as Ryan poured the moisturiser onto a hand, the paint scrapper under his arm pit.

Jeremy didn’t know what was about to happen. Would Ryan torture, rape or make love to this man?

Jeremy didn’t know and the feeling was, Intense, there was no other word for it.

Edgar sobbed quietly into the mattress and flinched violently when Ryan touched him. Gentle and sure fingers worked the soothing lotion into the unmarked skin of his back, careful not to disturb any welts. As he worked Ryan hummed deep in his throat, Jeremy finding himself kneeling beside the bed, head resting on his pillowed arms. It was a strangely intimate and soothing scene.

“Please...” Edgar dared to speak, his voice small and timid, “Please, your majesty. What are you doing to me?” Ryan traced his fingers over muscle, encouraging them to relax, trying to rub the tense way Edgar held his aching body.

“Edgar. I am a King with many worries upon my shoulders. Many stresses. I have people who depend on me. Who look up to me.” Ryan began, his voice as soothing as his hands, Jeremy almost wishing he could trade places with the helpless Edgar. Just to have that extreme focus on him.

“I need something. It builds within me. And you can help me. You can help me relax just as I’m doing now to you.” His words stayed gentle and calm, almost hypnotic, Jeremy starting to drift as he watched Ryan's hands work and let the gent’s voice fill him up.

“Don’t worry so much. I’m not going to Fuck you I promise.” Ryan reassured Edgar who gave a croaking cry at the word Fuck. Ryan chuckled and leant forwards, pushing his weight into his hands and kneading the flesh that rolled as he put his face near Edgar's neck. Jeremy swallowed hard as Ryan locked eyes with him and suddenly he knew the focus was off Edgar and Ryan’s next words, delivered so close to Edgar's Ears was meant for Jeremy.

“Not unless you beg me too.” He whispered and both Edgar and Jeremy shuddered for different reasons. Ryan sat up, releasing Jeremy from his gaze so the lad could shuffle and adjust himself as needed. Ryan patted down Edgar's back, loving the roll of unmarked skin, the smoothness of it.

“But I am going to hurt you.” He said, the words said casually like a invitation to a meal, “I’m going to hurt you then I’m going to soothe you. Hurt you, soothe you, hurt you, soothe you. And so on until your begging me to let you go.”

“Please your majesty! Let me go now!” Edgar begged franticly and Ryan laughed once more.

“Oh no, no, no. You think you mean that but you don’t. My subject here is curious. He wants to see you as I do. How’s your back feeling now? Ready to get started?” Ryan asked pleasantly and Jeremy perked up. Edgar mouthed denials but Ryan ignored them. He palmed the paint scrapper in hand and looked at Jeremy.

“Subject, did you want to see firsthand?” he asked and Jeremy nodded, pulling himself up onto the bed, settling beside Edgar’s side.

“Hey, get your dam shoe’s off, what are we animals?” Ryan chided and Jeremy kicked his joggers off, pulling his socks away for good measure. Ryan rolled his eyes and smiled down at Lil’J affectionately. With a finger he dug into the skin in Edgar's back, pressing down hard and pulling down, leaving a white mark quickly filled in with pink.

“See, this is perfect. Just the right amount of fat over lean muscle. Your beautiful Edgar.” Ryan praised and Edgar was shivering.

“Please, whatever you’re going to do. Don’t do it.” He begged quickly and Ryan tapped him on the head with the handle of the scrapper.

“Hush. We’re working back here.” He ordered and looked to Jeremy again.

“See the skin absorbs. That’s why moisturiser that is white, seems to fade away into this lovely sheen.” Ryan started to explain, Jeremy watching closely like a good student as Ryan put the scrapper metal piece down on Edgar's back. Slowly, he pressed it down and scrapped towards them, Edgar hissing uncomfortably. Jeremy was fascinated at the red left behind in the scrappers wake, the sound of metal scrapping flesh. Ryan showed Jeremy the end of the scrapper now had a thick line of grey moisturiser. He leant to the side and wiped it clean on the bedspread.

“that grey was all the dead skin and grime Edgar here has in his skin. We are going to clean it off.” He offered the handle to Jeremy who took it hesitantly.

“Your turn my boy.” Ryan instructed and Jeremy shifted closer so he could be guided into putting the metal against skin. Ryan’s hand closed over his own, showing him how much pressure to put.

“Not too gentle, or you’ll leave some behind, not too hard or you’ll start scrapping flesh.” Ryan taught and Jeremy felt power flow through his hand as Edgar hissed again, fists squeezing against the mild pain. He looked up to Ryan as he felt the rush of being in power reach his head. Ryan grinned knowingly and gestured to Edgar's back again.

Jeremy set the scrapper down beside the red track he had just made, drawing it down slowly without Ryan’s hand this time. At the end of the track he dug a little too hard, Edgar arching and swearing as the corners of the scrapper left two lines of blood in his skin.

Ryan slapped a hand down on Edgar's shoulder drawing another cry as he set all those welts burning once more.

“Edgar hush! Your ruining the moment for my subject! He’s new at this, we got to have patience.” He turned back to Jeremy, his face kinder and he smiled. He nodded at the back again and Jeremy obeyed, this time doing the opposite of Ryan’s mark. This one was perfect, not too hard and not too soft, Ryan praising him. The entire back was now red, the sheen from the moisturiser gone.

“Now the canvas is set. Let’s play.” Ryan said and gave Jeremy instructions to clean and replace the scrapper on the second tray from the bed. Then he was to choose whatever tool he liked.

“What? What tool? W-what are you going to do with me?” Edgar spoke up, his voice growing panicked. He moved under Ryan who frowned, star fishing his large hands over the small of Edgar's back.

“Still, Edgar. Or I’ll get mean again.”

“mean again? You’ve tied me up, beaten me and told me your going to hurt me! How much meaner can you get? You think I’m just going to lay here and take it?” Edgar started to raise his voice, ending in a shout and starting to twist, trying to get Ryan’s weight off him. Ryan sighed and waved a hand at Jeremy who had paused just inside the light.

“I got this, choose something.” He said offhandedly and Jeremy forced himself to turn away. He placed the scrapper back with other items, made of metal and seemingly flat. He had no idea what they were or what they were for.  He glanced up as he heard Edgar scream, seeing Ryan covering the man’s body with his own, his shoulders blocking out most of Jeremy’s view but he knew Ryan was doing something to Edgar's fingers.

“Edgar, get still or I’ll break the next one.” Ryan’s voice was clear to Jeremy, his body attuned to it. He looked over the interesting collection Ryan had built up and his eye’s caught on something that confused and intrigued him. Another scream from the bed. A series of small metal items, he collected up in one arm and turned back to the bed.

Edgar was sobbing once again but still, two fingers on his right hand bent oddly. Ryan was getting up and saw Jeremy walk into the light. He stepped between Edgar and Jeremy putting a finger too his lips.

“don’t show him, let it be a surprise.” He said excitedly and directed Jeremy to put the items on the bed near Edgar's knee. Ryan patted Jeremy’s shoulder and the shorter man felt the glow of approval.

“Nice choice. Very nice. I’ve just got to get stuff to set those fingers really quick. You talk to Edgar. Keep him calm huh?” Something akin to panic rose in Jeremy as his face dropped and Ryan walked away. They heard him take the stairs two at a time, whistling as the door opened then closed.

“Please, Sir! Don’t hurt me. Don’t let him hurt me! I got a family. I want to see them again. Don’t you have family? Loved ones? Let me go!” Edgar started to cry, pleading and Jeremy sat down beside the man’s shoulder so Edgar could roll his head to see him. He lifted a hand and awquardly patted Edgar's head.

“Ah, It’s cool man. Just uh, just be a good, Edgar, and this will all work out.” He was trying to go for the same soothing tone that Ryan had but all he could manage was teen style stuttering and pauses.

“My name is Brian! Please! Has he brainwashed you or something? I am a man. A man! Not some sort of toy!” anger was creeping into his voice and he started to crawl up the bed so he was kneeling once more, hands still hanging from the chain in front of him. Jeremy stood up, looking up at the door then back.

“On your stomach.” He ordered and Brain sneered at him.

“No! Go fuck yourself you little troll!” he snarled, his eyes red rimmed from tears but defiance on his face.

“Your just his little bitch is that it?” Brian taunted, wanting to get some power back. Jeremy narrowed his eyes, not liking the way this had turned. Ok sure, this was Ryan’s show but he was Jeremy, Monster truck, feared member of the dreaded FAKEAH. This whining little bastard couldn’t speak to him like that.

He curled his hand into a fist and snapped out with all the strength of his broad shoulders, cracking his knuckles on Edgar's cheekbones. Edgar slumped, falling back onto the bed, the short chain stopping him from hitting the mattress as he was pulled back towards the bed head by his bound wrists. Jeremy, feeling more powerful than he ever had after a hit, grabbed the back of Edgar's head and threw it forward, forehead meeting wood with a sickening thunk. Edgar moaned, body limp so Jeremy grabbed an ankle and pulled it straight.

“On your stomach.” He repeated and grabbed the other leg, pulling the unresisting Edgar back into position. He smiled at the sight and straightened up, his entire body feeling light and good.

“feel good?” Ryan’s voice came from directly behind him and Jeremy jumped. Ryan laughed and put up a hand to show friendly intent.

“It’s ok, I caught the tail end of that. Bad Edgar. Should know better than to mouth off. You dealt with it well but a little hint for next time? Don’t start with the head. You want them all together for as long as possible.” Jeremy nodded his understanding, Ryan stealing his voice with his presence. The man had an air of command around him that Jeremy never really experienced. Ryan tended to Edgar’s fingers, setting them and binding them tight with a splint. He then inspected the damage Jeremy had done to Edgar's face before deeming it satisfactory to continue.

With soft words and sure hands, he sat Jeremy down where he had sat before. Edgar gave a small moan as the weight settled onto his hips but said nothing, cowed by Jeremy’s display and Ryan’s presence. Jeremy felt his heart pound as Ryan sat behind him, coming up on his knee’s just a little so his head was a bit above and beside Jeremy’s. Hands traced down his arms, grabbing his wrist and using Jeremy like a puppet to pick up the tools Lil’J had selected.

The cookie cutters were piled up on the small of Edgar's back.

“Ok, Edgar, we are going to play a game. We’ve got some cookie cutters here. And you’re the cookie.” Ryan’s voice dropped into his low dangerous tone and Jeremy shivered against the gents chest. If he turned his head slightly he could see Ryan’s deranged smile just over his shoulder, the shape of Ryan’s chest pressed into Jeremy’s back.

“Why are you fucking doing this?” Edgar bit out, his entire back visibly tensing. Jeremy followed his instincts, picking up a cutter and running the metal piece over Edgar’s back, letting it scrap gently on the skin. Ryan rumbled approval behind Jeremy then spoke up.

“Because it’s fun. Now Edgar, we have five shapes here, all traditional. Guess which one we’re using correctly and it get’s removed.” Ryan’s breath warmed his ear as he started to speak directly too Jeremy.

“Choose. Place. Bare down. Don’t stop unless I say so.” He ordered sending chills and hot flushes over Jeremy’s body. Jeremy selected the Star, placing it just to the side of Edgar’s spine, just where his ribs bottomed out. He put both hands on the small metal shape, one atop the other as Edgar begged and writhed, screaming for mercy.

He bared down.

Ryan helped to steady him as their canvas thrashed and roared in pain, metal sinking through flesh slowly. Jeremy thought about Christmas just gone, the first time he had spent one as part of A team. Ryan had baked chocolate chip cookies, brought them still steaming from the oven to the table. Stars and tree’s and gingerbread men. The chocolate had oozed out as Jeremy had taken a bite, burning over his lips as his crew laughed at him.

Now he found himself laughing, blood quickly filling the little space inside the star, running down Edgar's sides. Ryan pulled him back, leaving the metal shape in bedded in Edgar's flesh.

“Edgar, your gonna want to calm down and start guessing.” Ryan spoke loudly over the broken cries of a man in pain. He pointed out the circle and tapped just below the shoulder bone. Obediently Jeremy put the circle to skin, unnoticed by Edgar who was still stuck begging. A gentle encouraging push against his shoulders, Ryan’s excited breath in his ear and Jeremy was bearing down again. Ryan’s hands caressed his upper arms and shoulders, voice deep in his mind.

“feel it? Do you feel it? Tell me you feel it too.” Ryan asked, his voice needy for once and Jeremy nodded. Blood was running over his fingers but he didn’t stop, the rush filling his veins with a light that he never had comprehended before.

“Circle! Circle! Circle! Circle!” chanted Edgar, choking on the word and Jeremy snapped a little out of the power rush at Ryan’s disappointed moan. The gent touched his wrist and commanded him to pull out the shape he had just inserted. Jeremy didn’t want to. He ignored Ryan’s demand, grabbing the next cutter and setting it opposite the circle. Before he could press down, Ryan’s voice became deadly.

“Stop. Now.”

Jeremy’s arm froze, the order cutting through the golden haze in his mind.

“Put it back.”

Jeremy put it back with the others still unused.

“Pull out the circle.” Jeremy whined, unable to voice why he needed the cutter to stay where it was. A pressure around his throat, his air way compressed only slightly.

“Pull out. The circle.”

Jeremy grabbed the metal, blood making it slick as he pulled it free. It slipped from his hand and fell, crimson glinting, off the bed.

“Off.”

There was only Ryan’s voice and Jeremy crawled his way off Edgar then the bed, the hand not leaving his throat. Once standing, Ryan’s eyes were cold, pining his own with a stare. Jeremy felt himself freeze and Ryan opened his mouth once more.

“Stay.”

Jeremy stayed as the hand left his throat and Ryan moved to tend to Edgar who had curled up once more. He flicked the Star still in Edgar's back bringing a cry that gave Jeremy another pleasant chill. Ryan made Edgar guess until he said star then yanked it out. From the two wounds, blood ran like a coating over that flawless back. It drew Jeremy’s focus, wanting to touch it, see the stream split around his finger.

Ryan grabbed his throat again, commanding him to follow. He was lead around to where Edgar sobbed into his arms, harshly, whole body shaking with the force of it. Ryan shoved Jeremy’s face forward. Letting go of his neck, Ryan instead grabbed Edgar by chin and hair so Jeremy could see his face. Edgar had his eyes tightly shut and everything was running. Tears, mucus and saliva coating his face.

“Open your eyes Edgar.” Demanded Ryan softly and when the man shook his head, pawing helplessly at the bed head, Ryan morphed into something terrible.

“OPEN YOUR FUCKING EYES!” he roared, spittle flying, his hands giving a neck jarring shake. Edgar’s eyes opened wide, Jeremy inches from them.

Ryan looked between them as Jeremy inspected Edgar closely.

“Well?” Ryan asked and Jeremy felt that golden glow once more, fascination and awe in his tone.

“They’re full. There’s pain and anger. Confusion and aimless hope. You were right My king. They shine.” He said softly and Ryan let Edgar's face go. He helped Jeremy up and walked the lad towards the stairs, helping the unsteady lad up as Jeremy shot looks over his shoulder at the curled up man on the bed.

“I know, I know you want to stay. But have a break alright? Alex’s here, he’ll help you.” Ryan’s voice rang oddly too Jeremy as they exited the basement and he looked at the gent to see what the difference was. Ryan smiled kindly, his face soft once more in the familiar Ryan that he saw all the time at the share house.

“Sire?” He asked hesitantly and Ryan pushed him down on the couch with a chuckle.

“Just Ryan Jeremy. Just Ryan here.”

“Oh god dam it Ryan, did you break him?” Alex’s voice broke into Jeremy’s mind like glass cracking. He blinked, body starting to respond to his thoughts once more.

“Alex?” he asked and then the goateed man was there, hands gently taking his in a warm damp cloth. Jeremy looked down and saw up to his wrists were covered in sticky fresh blood. He furrowed his brows and looked up between the two gents, one sighing as he cleaned up the lad the other smiling gently, and a grounding hand on Jeremy’s shoulder.

“What? What’s happening?” he asked them as he came down from the impossible high he had been riding.

“Ryan, I don’t think he’s ready.” Alex said, ignoring Jeremy for the time being and Ryan gave a sigh of his own patting Jeremy fondly.

“He could see Jack. He saw it.” He said and Alex looked up at him, shock on his face. Ryan nodded and gave a short chortle then caught Jeremy staring at him. He brought his other hand to Jeremy’s face tenderly.

“It’s ok Lil’J. Just relax and breath alright? Alex’s gonna clean you up. I got a few little chores to do then we’ll eat, shower and see if you’re up for round two.” He assured him then he left, Jeremy trying to follow him but Alex forced him down, moving from one hand to the other.

“No Jeremy, that’s enough. Ryan’s got allot of experience at this stuff. You however are green as grass so you stay here and I’ll take care of you.” Jeremy focused on Alex, confusion written all over his features.

“Did that just happen? Or am I dreaming?”

“No it’s real. I tried to warn you but I guess it’s better this way. Ryan was all alone when he discovered he could see. It’s what eventually brought him to us. At least you got him to guide you through it.” Alex sighed again and got up, pulling Jeremy to his feet who was still confused.

“See what? What are you on about?”

“That need Jeremy. The need you have inside you that I’m guessing you didn’t know about. I don’t have it but I’ve watched Ryan and even seen him work close hand, trying to understand him. Every time you kill, your disappointed, aren’t you?” Alex asked and pulled him into the kitchen, making him sit so Alex could watch him and prepare dinner.

Jeremy thought back. He loved his job but yeah, lately, the past year or so, every time he took out a target he felt empty. Like something was missing. Every kill, every death he caused, just didn’t sit right. It’s what had drawn him into watching Ryan. Trying to see what he was missing.

“You’re always grumpy after a heist or a hit. Your kill count has been steadily getting higher. Geoff and I were starting to get worried, wondering how to approach you. Then you started watching Ryan and it clicked to all three of us. And now Ryan’s confirmed it.” Jeremy looked down at his hands, now clean then back up too Alex who was looking at him with sympathy.

“It’s ok Jeremy. We’ll take care of you.” He murmured and Jeremy let himself acknowledge what he had discovered today down in that room with a mad king and a writhing toy.

“We always take care of our own.” Alex said voice ringing with acceptance of their newly discovered serial killer.

After all, they were all broken in some way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and Kudos apreciated if you feel like giving them. So this isn't the end of jeremy and Ryan's journey but all FakeAH are messed up and we will hear more on how. Gavin i already got a good idea for and micheal i'm tossing around one. If you got a sudgest for how how any of them are twisted, leave a comment with your idea. More minds make better stories :)


	4. How gavin caught the Bug

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gavins quirk revealed. how it came about and how he met the guys.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok i like this quirk alright? it's interesting to me the power of words. Just look at stories themselves. So anyway here you go, enjoy  
> Oh suicidal thoughts, encouraging murder, trying to kill people i guess? i dunno read it and comment what tags i should use to warn others.  
> its dark but youve been warned before.

Gavin discovered at a young age what the power of words could do. At fourteen, he was being bullied nonstop. They never struck him, never touched him and yet they hurt him all the same. He was depressed, not wanting to go into school or even check his MSN for fear of those cutting words. Then one day it happened.

He trudged to school, head down and a pit in his stomach. Then as he entered the yard, he noticed a hush over the students. There was a sombre air to the school, the teachers had red rimmed eyed and the students whispered behind hands. A boy had killed himself. He had pointed out multiple guys in his suicide letter as the cause.

Gavin wandered about kinda lost, thinking quietly to himself.

He hadn’t gone to class and ducked into the girls lavatory to avoid a patrolling teacher. Once inside he hears a soft pealing sound of a girl in tears. He backed into a cubicle beside the occupied one, just listening. She wasn’t very loud, just constant. He made out a name that was being murmured in grief and understood.

“Are you his sister?” he spoke up, wanting to confirm his hunch. The breathy sobs stopped as she realised she wasn’t alone.

“Who are you?!” she demanded, keeping quiet so not to attract teacher attention. Gavin didn’t know why he was doing it but something made him say, “Another boy who get’s ripped on way too much.” He cocked his head as he heard her suck in a gasp. Then she was blurting out her whole story. How it had been her brother, two years younger than her. That she had tried to get them to stop but they just did it whenever she wasn’t around. How she watched fear creep into her brother’s life, watched it take him apart.

Gavin was fascinated. Really? Words undid this boy? The same thing he himself was avoiding. Meer words had killed this kid. Could it kill him? Would it? He considered that as she continued.

She knew the boys who did it. Memorised their names and their faces. They were getting counselling, something she thought was disgusting. They had murdered her baby brother in her eyes and yet they were going to get away with it. They were troubled, the adults told them. In need of pity.

Like the pity they never showed her brother.

Lightening struck Gavin as he sat there in that girls bathroom stall. Without meaning too, those boys had driven someone to death. He wondered if he could do the same.

“It’s a right royal shame what happened to your brother.” Gavin said, his tone just the right amount of sympathy with a touch of anger to rouse this girls own ire.

“Just going to walk away from it those knobs will. They get to move on, live their lives. Do it again.”

 He struck gold by how heavy the silence became with those three words. His voice sounded younger and a little broken despite the grin splitting his face.

“Do it to me. I’m next, I can feel it. I don’t have a sister to watch out for me.” He let his voice trail off into defeat, let the girl sing out denials, of pleads, or threats. Everything she couldn’t tell her brother.

“I don’t know what to do.” Gavin sniffled and he felt the girl like there was a string of invisible energy between them. He didn’t know how but the right words drifted from his mouth into her brain, setting an idea there.

“I just don’t know how to stop them. They’ll kill me just like they killed him. Like they’ve properly killed before. They won’t stop. Not so long as they live.” There, it was said. The girl fell quiet and Gavin felt the thrum of success when she spoke again.

“Don’t worry.” She said firmly, her grief hardening into righteous anger, “I’ll stop them. They won’t hurt anyone else again.”

Three days later, he walked to school with a bounce to his step. The news was everywhere, everyone in Britain was talking about it. The heart broken sister, breaking into the principal’s office and slitting two boys throats, being dragged screaming and slashing out the door as the third boy screamed. It made news around the world.

Gavin had made it happen. No one knew but he did and he felt stronger than he ever had before. So what if he was lanky and skinny. So what if he couldn’t shimmy up a tosser rope or lift weights? He, pathetic, weak, geeky Gavin had ruined four lives forever. The best part was no one could trace it back to him.

He graduated high school, one of the only students to be smiling in the group photo. A tragic Car accident the day before had taken five of their class mates and two passersby to the grave. No one knew why they had decided too but it sure seemed like they meant to drive into the bus stop as fast as the car could go.

Life was fragile and ultimately futile.

At least that’s what friendly, caring understanding Gavin told people.

He worked at a support line for two years before they finally understood what he had been doing. Why his line had a higher rate of failure. He said all the right things but in a way that pointed out the uselessness of it all. Sweet, kind Gavin persuaded people to end their lives. No one knew just how many.

Gavin skipped out to the states when things got a bit hot at work. He had moved to los Santos and turned his skill into hacking, getting into people’s home computers, a ghost that intimately knew them. That siphoned their money and their lives. In that way he was discovered by Geoff Ramsey who had been looking for a hacker to join his team.

When he sent Alex and Ryan to pick Gavin up, the two older gentleman had gagged him. Gavin with the golden tongue listen quietly to Geoff’s offer. They already knew about his sordid past and how he liked to spend his time. They didn’t give a shit as long as it didn’t affect his work.

Gavin agreed in a thrice.

Of course he did try to smooth talk them but they seemed immune. Geoff had outwards laughed when he realised what Gavin was trying to do, smothering his curls affectionately.

“Please Gavvers, you can’t sweet talk me into killing myself. I got you assholes to live for.” He had said. Alex had fixed him with that deadpan stare that for once dried up Gavin’s throat. Ryan had grinned, backing him into a corner, looking down at him with all the confidence of a lion on the hunt.

“talk dirty to me baby.” He’d whispered and Gavin wisely closed his mouth.

When he met Michael, every time the red head sensed him trying his mind games, Gavin would find himself laid out flat. Jeremy joined and Gavin felt as if he had found his ticket, the short, well trimmed man listening intently to every word. He nodded and teared up and his hands shook. Then when Gavin trailed away, a understanding hand on Jeremy’s shoulder ready to comfort him to the grave, he had been looked at with those puppy dog eyes just swimming with water.

“And that works?” a sniffle and Jeremy wiped his face, “they just follow you off the bridge?” Gavin groaned and slumped, frustrated as Jeremy recovered from his cry.

“Bollocks.” He grumbled and from behind them Alex started chuckling.

“We don’t hire weak minded people Gavin.” He had assured the British man.

It didn’t matter. The six became like family, accepting each other’s quirks and even enjoying them. With their B team, they worked together building their empire. And sometimes, Gavin’s family would supply him with a good mark, a promising article of heartbreak or the address of someone struggling through hard times.

With a wide grin and a friendly disposition, Gavin would be off, ready to help his next victim come to the best conclusion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tada! comments and kudos apreciated if you wanna give them, whatever if you don't i'm sure i'll survive. Let me know in the comments of what tags i should add or a quirk for the other guys, B team included! I got a nice one for trevor but give me an idea and if i like it more i'll use it, if not i might make a special little prompt one shot :)  
> See you soon!


	5. Gavin's cynthia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Girl meets Boy, Girl loves Boy, Girl listens to Boy with the golden voice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For my commentors GanglyLimbs and LibbyBell! even if you guys are the only two reading, i'll try to keep it up. Hope everyone enjoys this next part.  
> Obviously warnings, youve seen the tags read the summary ect, this one has gavin so heavy on depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts that will be encouraged...  
> I love this dark FAKEAH their all so delightfully fucked in the head

Gavin was so excited when he came home, phone in hand, waving it at the group. Jeremy and Michael were at the kitchen table eating a delicious lasagne Ryan had cooked. The gent himself was in the kitchen, cleaning up before he ate himself, his face paint covering his expressions when he looked up. Gavin whooped for joy and ran to his fellow lads, still showing them his burner phone.

“Look! Look! I got an awesome one!” he crowed and shoved the phone screen in Michael’s face who groaned in irritation and pushed Gavin’s hand away.

“Good great, happy for you gav, I’m trying to eat here.” He said and Gavin ignored his tone, now leaping around the table to show Jeremy, still trilling about his find.

“She’s beautiful! No family because, get this, they died in a crash that gave her a wicked scar on her back! Few friends, introverted, works in a dead-end fast-food job, self conscious, eating her feelings and now...” he paused for dramatic effect lifting his phone like he was King Arthur drawing Excalibur, “Dating me!”

The reaction was underwhelming. Michael blinked at him then returned to eating and playing on his phone. Jeremy gave a condescending smile and patted Gavin’s arm, “That’s great gav.” He murmured then pointed to the kitchen.

“Grubs in there.”

Gavin fell into a chair, putting his head on his hand and twirling the phone muttering to himself. Ryan came out carrying a bowl for himself and a bowl for Gavin. He sat next to the dejected lad as the other two started talking about the new restaurant their allies had just opened. Gavin snorted as Ryan slid the bowl under his nose only looking up when Ryan bumped him with a shoulder.

“So what caused the crash?” he asked and Gavin rolled his eyes at the gent.

“You don’t care.” He pointed out and the other two lads hushed up at the venom in Gavin’s voice. Ryan shrugged and took a mouthful of his lasagne, making sure to swallow before he answered.

“I do gav. It’s important to you. You may not come down with me and work side by side, but you’ve helped me out, disposing of the parts or coming on the hunt with me.” Ryan spoke slowly, Gavin sitting up a bit straighter and as Jeremy and Michael slumped, starting to feel ashamed of themselves. Gavin was such a good friend to them. He was always there no matter what you needed, always ready to listen or talk. Now they had all bonded, he never really tried to kill them anymore. He did his job well, helped out around the share house. He was so happy and buoyant that sometimes they forgot how important his little hobby was to him.

Every bit as powerful as Michaels drive and just as important as Ryan and Jeremy’s need.

“So I want to hear about this girl. Is she a quickie or are you doing a long burn this time?” he finally looked to Gavin who searched that red painted face, seeing the sincerity there and breaking into a wide grin.

“Oh it’s top Ryan. I don’t even know. She’s trying so hard to stay positive, upbeat. She’s got such a healthy attitude. I’ve only just started and I couldn’t even tell you when I think she’ll snap.” Jeremy sat forward and tapped Gavin’s bowl to get his attention.

“What’s her name? Where does she work?” he asked and Gavin turned that enthusiasm to Jeremy.

“Cynthia and she works at the white castle just a few blocks away here.” Michael joined in the conversation and soon Gavin was lit up, waving his fork around, splattering them with sauce as he went on about his new find. Ryan, when Gavin was looking to Jeremy, caught Michael’s eye and gave a wink, receiving a grin and an affectionate roll of the eyes back.

“Gavin, if you need some help, we can start going by white castle and be asshole customers for you.” Michael offered and Gavin threw himself over the table, into Michaels arms as Ryan and Jeremy cried out and complained at the mess that went everywhere.

“Oh my boi! That’s genius that is! Can you ask for a shake then ask what that scab is over her shoulder? Oh you’ll drive her up the wall and she’ll come running to me!” Gavin enthused as Michael was trying to shove him off his lap, the chair giving way and toppling them both to the floor, Michael swearing hotly and Gavin cackling madly.

“What the fuck is going on in here?” Geoff asked, a whiskey already in his hand, his suit sleeves pushed up, the ends tinged in red. Alex put down a heavy bag and joined Geoff in the kitchen, looking at the humorous mess in the living room.

“Ryan. I leave you in charge for two hours. Seriously.” He said slowly, the smile in his goatee making the words a tease as Ryan stuttered, gesturing helplessly at the lad pile, Jeremy having said fuck it and throwing himself atop the other two.

Geoff grinned and took another sip of whiskey, his eyes glittering as he thought about how much he loved this group of shattered humans.

 

“For fuck sakes, what’s taking so god dam long? It’s dead as dicks in here, we’re your only god dam customers!” Cynthia’s customer complained loudly and she blinked back the tears that prickled at her eyes. She couldn’t make the machine go any faster, the ice-cream curling slowly into the cup.

“What the fucks up with her back? She got a hunchback or something?” said the customers younger red headed companion. Cynthia flushed as she felt self consciousness rush through her. The scar on her shoulder travelled down her back and she had a hard time straightening fully. But these assholes didn’t know that so she fixed a bright smile and turned about, offering the sundae to the older man with the handlebar moustache.

“Here you are sir!” she said brightly, offering it to him.

“The fuck is this?” He asked, looking between the sundae and her face as his younger friend sneered at her.

“Your chocolate ice-cream sir.” Cynthia said, her heart sinking as his face turned nasty. Behind him the redhead started to laugh.

“Stupid bitch needs to open her ears.” He said but Cynthia was quailing under the powerful glare her customer was giving her.

“I asked for Carmel. Carmel! Not fucking chocolate. Make me a Carmel and I expect fucking refund for your fuck up!” he said forcefully and she flinched back and nodded quickly. Cynthia was sure he had clearly said chocolate but the customer was always right. She was always wrong. She tried to wipe her tears subtly as she made a new sundae but it was no good.

“Oh for fuck sakes, let’s just leave. She’s going to get fucking tears in your ice-cream dude. Just let her fucking eat them both like we all know the fat bitch is going too.” The younger said loudly and clearly. She couldn’t face them, couldn’t turn to look as the older one scoffed an agreement. She heard a clink and turned her head slightly too see they had taken the tip jar as they stalked out.

“Thanks for the refund bitch!” they laughed as they left and Cynthia broke down.

 

She ran into Gavin’s arms when she saw him, her new boyfriend holding her tightly. He was a god send, so funny and silly. He made her laugh and made her feel comfortable. So when that nightmare shift reached an end, she called him to meet her at their cafe.

Like in a movie, she had met him there. She had been sitting alone, staring dejected into her coffee after being stood up by one of her friends who was suddenly too busy to hang with her. Gavin had a problem with balance and had tripped, pouring his milkshake over her lap where she sat near the door. He had made the most delightful distressed noises, babbling away in his wonderful accent.

“Oh gosh! I’m so sorry! Are you ok? I’m a right wanker eh, sorry love, I’ll pay the cleaning bill.” He had gone on as she tried to wave him off, mopping the mess up with napkins as he hovered around her, hands flapping in distress.

“No, no. It’s ok. Fits in with my day anyway.” She had muttered feeling a bit sorry for herself. When she realised the flow of words had stopped, she looked up expecting him to be gone. Instead she had met his eyes, crinkling in sympathy.

“Bad day love? Same here actually.” He had said softly and she felt herself drawn to this foreigner with his sweet face and caring eyes. He had asked to sit with her and they traded stories of bad days, Gavin pointing out the humour in the things that were going wrong for both of them. Amazingly he had her laughing and to her surprise he had shyly asked for her number.

They texted and called whenever they could, Gavin’s work hours a little hectic being an on call computer specialist for the elite of Los Santos, but they worked around it. Like now, he always seemed to be here when she needed him. She had called, in tears and he came running to meet her at the cafe.

Now in his arms, she sobbed out her bad day, his lean long fingers rubbing circles into the small of her back. She sucked in a little gasp whenever his fingers brushed the bottom of her scar but he never mentioned it. He simply let her cry and nodded his head, murmuring soothing nothings as she described the assholes she had served.

“Oh love,” he said when she trailed off hiccupping, “Assholes are everywhere. There’s no escaping them in this life.” He said and she leant back a little, to wipe her face.

“I know, I know. Just ignore them right?” she muttered and he grabbed her chin, gently tipping her head to look at him. His own eyes were shining with tears and she was touched that he was so moved by her pain.

“No. You can’t ignore them. They will refuse to be ignored.” He said and she started to tear up again.

“Then what do I do?” she asked and Gavin kissed her nose and pulled her back into him.

“I’m not sure. I just wish there was a way we could escape.” He said and she felt him tremble. Gavin would say no more about it and they headed to her place. She had been to his once but it was clear he was ashamed of it. A little rundown apartment in vagos territory that looked dilapidated and almost unlived in. Gavin admitted he spent as little time there as possible when he saw her run a finger through the dust on his counter. Cynthia, mindful of his feelings, invited him to her place more often.

Home sweet home, they curled into her couch watching Netflix and relaxing. Cynthia listened to Gavin’s heart and she smiled giving a little sigh.

“What’s up.” Gavin asked with a little chuckle when he saw her happy face.

“Oh, I’m just happy I got you.” She said and looked up to him.

“Really Gavin. You are like the only good thing in my life right now.” She said and he brightened, kissing her gently but firmly.

“You're so perfect Cynthia.” He said and she shivered as his accent caressed her name. He leant back and tipped his head at the TV, breaking the serious mode in his normal humorous way.

“Well, me AND Netflix right?” he asked her and she giggled. She still hadn’t slept with Gavin yet but she wanted too. But she didn’t want to push herself on him and as much as he touched her and kissed her, responding with groans when their make out sessions got heavy, he still wouldn’t bed her. Kind Cynthia didn’t press, knowing Gavin had his own story and they were still learning each other. Still, she did wonder at the small mysteries.

Gavin by all accounts should have a high paying job but he lived in that crappy apartment. Sometimes he’d text her saying he was busy, didn’t have time for her whining. Or he’d just stop talking to her for days at a time until she was crying, thinking he had left her. Then all of a sudden he’d be back, lavishing love on her, begging for forgiveness, saying work got hard and he was really sorry.

She’d forgive him because very quickly, faster then she imagined, he became her world.

 

Gavin came up to Geoff one day, head down and looking nervous. Geoff paused his game and patted the couch cushion next to him. Gavin sat slowly, turning his burner phone over and over in his hands. Geoff was curious as to what was up but stayed quiet letting Gavin work up to what he wanted to say.

“Geoff.” Gavin said softly and Geoff put an arm around Gavin’s shoulders, pulling the lad to lean on his shoulder.

“What’s up buddy?” he asked now Gavin had spoken.

“Geoff, you got no work for me for awhile right?”

“Well, no. Not that I know of unless something pops up. Why? Do you need some money? You know you can just ask, you don’t need to work for every penny.” Gavin shook his head and bounced his knee, hand clenching around the phone.

“No not that. It’s Cynthia.” He admitted and looked up to Geoff who grinned, “that girl Michael an I played with huh? What about her? She gone already?” Gavin shook his head and gestured helplessly trying to explain what he needed.

“Not yet. I thought she would be but she’s hanging on. I got the power cut to her house, I got Netflix removed. You guys been torturing her and I had her boss blackmailed into blaming her for everything that goes wrong when she’s on shift. I even gifted Jeremy and Ryan with her one friend that wouldn’t stop keeping in contact with her!” he frowned and threw his head back, running fingers through his hair frustrated.

“She just won’t break!” he finally yelled, his anger making him jump to his feet and throw the phone down, starting to pace in front of Geoff.

“I ignore her, she’s still there. I tell her I’m too busy for her whingeing shit then she’s still there. I slip her pamphlets about weightless and she fucking buys the shakes!” Gavin was snarling now and Geoff leant forward, hands clasped between his knees as he watched Gavin. This feral man looked dangerous in a way the hacker normally didn’t. Geoff had seen this before in Ryan when he was starving for a kill. A lesser version in Jeremy during the slow build up before they found out what he needed.

Gavin may not do the deed himself, but he was a killer.

And he was frustrated. Geoff finally got up and snagged Gavin when the British man put his foot through the coffee table.

“Gavin! Calm down alright! Now, we’re going to help you get her ok?” he tried to reassure but Gavin just shook his head violently.

“No! No! We aren’t going to kill her! She needs to do it herself!” and Geoff made Gavin look at him.

“I know Gavin, I know. She will. Hey! Hey!” he grabbed Gavin’s face in both hands as the lanky man’s head lolled in frustration, making him still.

“Cynthia will kill herself.” Geoff said slowly with conviction and Gavin took a deep breath, calming himself. Geoff patted his face and nodded slowly.

“Ok, now. Think. What’s keeping her around?” he asked and Gavin bit his lips thinking. Geoff saw Alex came in through the front door and take in the living room. He came in slowly, shutting the door quietly and putting the shopping on the kitchen bench. As he came into the living room, Gavin snapped his fingers and pulled himself out of Geoff’s grasp to pace excitedly.

“that’s it!” he crowed then started to murmur, low and fast to himself. Alex stood next to Geoff watching Gavin and asked what was going on.

“Gavin’s Cynthia is a strong willed girl.” Geoff said and Alex nodded in understanding. Gavin stoped his pacing and put up both hands to the gents, palms facing them like he was about to give a pitch.

“Ok! Oh, hey Alex. So, I got it! She’s got this stupid stray cat she feeds. I need someone to run it over.” He started and Alex raised a hand, speaking when Gavin nodded to him.

“I’ll ask Ryan for you. He’s cool with that kinda stuff.” Gavin clicked his fingers and pointed at him happily.

“Awesome, do it. Then I’m gonna get a few different numbers she doesn’t recognise and text her like I’m her dead family. Blaming her for the crash. She had been fighting with her sister and her dad turned to yell at them, took his eyes off the road.” He gave an evil squeal of joy tapping his feet like an excited child.

“Ok lastly, I need you guys to beat the fuck out of me.” He said and now the gents couldn’t stay quiet.

“What?! No Gavvers! We’re not going to hurt you.” Geoff said, Alex folding his arms and nodding with Geoff’s words. Gavin groaned in disappointment, coming forward quickly to lay a hand on Alex’s arm and Geoff’s shoulder.

“Please? Pretty please? I’ll take her on a date, we’ll walk to her home and you start hassling her. I’ll step in, tell you to fuck off and you make mince meat out of me. Then I tell her it’s her fault.” His eyes sparkled, no longer with them as he murmured.

“It’ll be great. In her house, on her couch. She can try to stitch me up and I’ll blame her. Nicely, subtly of course but it’ll be there. I can give her the gun. Tell her we’ll do it together.” He sucked in a quivering breath trembling as he took a step back, a hand to his mouth.

“I could watch her do it. Actually be there.”

“Gavin, no. What if she shoots you?” Geoff tried to reason and Gavin looked to him.

“Kill me? Why? I’m her wonderful boyfriend! She wouldn’t shoot me. We’re in love. We’re going to kill ourselves together.” Alex unfolded his arms at Gavin’s convincing tone.

“Ah, that’s your golden tongue talking right? You’re not really in love with this girl are you.” Gavin scoffed, furrowing his brows and chuckling, becoming back to the Gavin they knew. He waved a hand at Alex and chuckled.

“Come on Al. Really? I thought you guys were ‘immune’” he mocked and the boss and his second exchanged relieved looks before turning back too Gavin. They sat him down and together they planned, talking Gavin down from his more exuberant ideas.

 

Cynthia held Gavin’s hand on the walk home. She had wanted to drive but Gavin had told her gently that maybe they should get some exercise. That maybe someone had been having too many cheat days. Cynthia had flushed in shame but said nothing. Gavin was so wonderful to her that if all he needed was her to lose her disgusting fat, that’s what she’d do.

The restaurant had been lovely, the service excellent. She had asked about the special but she saw Gavin cock an eye at her so she settled on soup. At the end, he offered to pay only to find that he had been pick pocketed. She knew he wasn’t lying because she had seen him pay for the cab in front of her house. She pointed out that sandy haired, bearded man with glasses had bumped into him and Gavin had laughed, flushing with embarrassment as she paid for dinner joking, “Jesus stole my wallet.” She couldn’t really afford it but she had no choice.

She told him about her dead cat she had found run over in front of her home and he had squeezed her hand comfortingly.

“All well. It’s probably better off. I mean it only had you in this world.” He pointed out with sympathy for the cat and she nodded agreeing. She felt very small as they continued along, Gavin complaining about work, how half the time they didn’t pay because they were gang members that would kill him if he bitched. Cynthia had tried to relate, saying that gangs had been breaking into houses around her neighbourhood but Gavin rolled his eyes at her.

“Please, not everything is about you Cynthia.” He had said scathingly, his grip just a little tight. She quietened down, ducking her head ashamed. Then she heard a sound that made her blood turn cold. The laughter of the cruel men who had been in and out of her store for the past few weeks.

“Well, well, look who it is.” The younger said.

“If it isn’t  Quasimodo, the girl who ate white castle.” Put in the older. There was a third man, his smile wide as he chuckled, eyeing her off with his friends.

“This is the bitch you told me about?” he asked his friends. They were blocking the footpath, her house only a short distance away. She felt Gavin’s hand tremble in hers, his grip so tight that he was bruising her fingers.

“Oi Wankers! You talking about my girlfriend?”

“Girlfriend! Did you hear that? You fuck that whale kid?” the leader said, his arms now uncovered to show tattoos that covered them completely. Cynthia tried to pull Gavin back but he stepped forward.

“She’s been trying to lose weight you bellend! When she does of course, I will. So shove off!” Gavin said, his voice cracking but angry. Cynthia shrieked as the redhead took a step forward and Decked Gavin, her boyfriend hitting the pavement hard. She screamed again but it was cut off when the new man grabbed her in a hold, putting a hand across her mouth.

“Shut the fuck up. Watch your uppity prince get his huh.” He snarled as the leader and their younger friend proceeded to kick Gavin, stomping on him and reaching down to pull him upright, just to smash their fists into him until he fell once more.

“Fucking foreigner mouthing off over this piece of trash.” The red head said, giving Gavin another parting kick to the ribs, the lanky man, curled up, hands covering his head and whimpering. The leader laughed and spat on him, turning to fix Cynthia with a deadly glare.

“You fat fuck. Don’t eat his fucking bony ass huh? We might wanna come back this way and he makes a great punching bag.” She cried against the hand holding her when her worst customer slapped her face then grunted.

“Fucking useless. Let her go. Not worth our time to even fuck her. Don’t want that gross shit on my dick.” They all laughed cruelly and Cynthia was released to fall onto of Gavin, sobbing hard as the three wandered away. She sat up, trying to reign in her hysterics as Gavin slowly uncurled.

“Gavin! Gavin are you ok?”

“Do I look fucking ok?” He spat, his voice venomous and she flinched from him. He glared at her in disgust, eyes red and tears still flowing down his angry face.

“The fuck are you crying about? I’m the one who got their shit kicked in.” He pointed out, his face swelling and bruises already starting to come in all over his body. He sniffled and got up by himself, shoving her away and wincing, grabbing his ribs.

“Please, please let me get you to my house. We can call the police and ambulance from there.”

He started to limp that way, snarling at her if she tried to touch him.

“Are you mental? Call the police? They were obviously gang! Why didn’t you tell me you lived in a gang area?”

“I tried but-“

“Shut up Cynthia, just shut it. I don’t want to hear your excuses.” She whimpered, trying to hold it together. The hate and fury in Gavin’s voice more then she could bear. Lately it had seemed that everything was going wrong. The world only showed her its hard face and Gavin had been the shining light. Now he was hurt and angry and it was all her fault.

Gavin complained as she fiddled with her keys, dropping them in her distress trying to get the door open.

“Don’t mind me, just gonna bleed into my spleen because my stupid girlfriend can’t use her fat fingers.” He joked harshly and she reminded herself that Gavin was not himself. That he was rightfully angry at the beating he’d received on her behalf. Defending her honour when they all knew he wouldn’t touch her while she was so ugly. She was lucky he even wanted her to kiss him.

Dropping into the couch with a groan, Gavin bent at the waist, hugging his sides. Cynthia went to the fridge and grabbed a bag of frozen peas, bringing them back to him. Gavin took them and lifted his shirt, applying them directly to his ribs were a dark black bruise covered his skin. He moaned in relief and finally allowed Cynthia to rest a hand on his shoulder and thigh without batting her away.

“Oh love, I’m so sorry.” He said and looked up at her, pain on his face.

“I’m sorry I was so nasty. I know you mean well, that you try to stop stuffing your face.” He said softly, his voice becoming hypnotic as Cynthia began to cry, falling forward so her forehead rested on his shoulder.

“You try so hard. Don’t think I don’t notice. I’m here for you Cynthia. I know you don’t realise how you drive people away. How they can’t stand being around you. Because your good love, so good inside. You just can’t see all the bad.”

“I can.” She voiced quietly, her hand fisting against his shirt, “I see everything bad Gavin. You were right. You can’t just ignore it. I’ve tried to, tried to stay happy. Tried to say it’ll get better. But it never does.” She sobbed and she came undone as Gavin put a painful arm around her shoulder.

“Oh Cynthia, darling. My poor idiot girl. Can I tell you something?”

 she nodded, still crying but hushing so she could hear him.

“Before I met you, I was going to kill myself.” She looked up to see his face was serious, the same pain in his face that weight her down day to day.

“Then I met you, and I held on. Hoping you were worth it. But things keep going wrong, nothing wants to work, the world is nasty and hard and I’m tired.” Cynthia frowned, hiccupping softly, trying to understand what he was saying, his words addressing just how she felt.

“I don’t want to stay here.” He said in his beautiful voice and she knew he meant here in the world. Alive.

“But I don’t want to leave you.” He added and she sniffled, making up her mind, the rightness of it washing away the pain and the hurt and the guilt. No more will she be bullied. No more will her family taunt her from the grave. No more customers or gangs, bitchy bosses or fair-weather friends. Just her and Gavin.

Forever.

“You don’t have to leave me.” She said, her voice sounding amazingly firm to her ears, “I’ll come with you.” She said and Gavin sat back in shock, wincing again as the movement fired the aches of his body.

“You-You will?” he said, hope and love in his voice and she nodded. He smiled at her and damming his injuries kissed her hard, getting both their heart thumping loudly in their ears.

“Oh Cynthia. I knew you were the one. I knew you were special! Grab my bag, I got just the ticket.” She looked at the bag by the door. The one Gavin carried everywhere but had left behind tonight. She didn’t question that, just getting up and bringing the bag to Gavin. He didn’t take it however, just pressing it into her hands.

“Open it.” He said, his voice like honey. She did and gasped. She pulled the deadly weapon out, feeling the weight in her palm.

“Gavin...” she started questioning but he cut her off.

“It’s my back up plan. Somehow, having it close helped me get through another day until I came back to you.” The sweetness of it had her crying again as he hugged her. When she slowed down, she wiped her face, turning the pistol over in her hands.

“What now?” she asked hesitantly and Gavin kissed her cheek.

“I’ll guide you through it.” He offered and she nodded. She didn’t think she could bear to watch Gavin take his life. She offered it to him but he waved it away again.

“No, you need to do it yourself. I could never hurt you like that.” He said and she nodded again, feeling surreal. She just concentrated on his hand in hers, the softness of his side where she leant against him. The sweetness of his golden tongue.

“Ok, safety is off love. Just put it up to your chin. No angle a bit better love, that’s it, good girl. You want to get right through, we don’t want you to be in pain. That’s it, squeeze my hand, I’m right here.”

“Gavin” she breathed, shutting her eyes tears leaking from the sides of her eyes as she pointed the gun directly at her brain through her jaw. This way everything would go upwards and Gavin won’t lose the gun or get messy so when they were both found, they would look like they fell asleep watching Netflix.

“Cynthia. I’m here. I want you to do this for me. Don’t you love me?” his honeyed voice steadied her shaking hand and she took a deep breath.

“I’m scared.” She whispered and he squeezed the hand in his.

“Don’t be. I love you. You’re so special. You’re everything I want. Now do it love. Just pull the trigger and it’ll be done. For me.”

Gavin stopped breathing when the trigger clicked and the shot rang out. Blood and brain rained down upon him but he didn’t look away from her face. He didn’t know how long he sat there but he knew his phone rang a few times. She was beautiful to him. Gorgeous. An angel.

This had been an altering experience. To actually be present. To sit here and hold her hand as he talked her through it. He knew he couldn’t settle for anything less from now on. She had ruined him, set the bar higher. But for now it didn’t matter, this kill was going to satisfy him for a long, long time.

He finally pulled his phone out, not letting go of her hand, ignoring messages for the photo option. He took a selfie, leaning against her then another kissing her rapidly cooling lips. He stood up and sent a quick message to Geoff saying he was done then went back to taking photos of every detail. He frowned and cursed he hadn’t thought of filming it. All well, next time.

A knock on the door made him freeze until he heard Jeremy’s joking voice.

“This is your cleanup crew.” Gavin grinned and opened the door, letting them in. Jeremy came in first, whistling appreciatively at the body, Ryan stalking close behind him, his mask on, every inch the Vagabond.

“Geez gav, this is a mess.” Jeremy commented and Gavin glared at Jeremy.

“Don’t say that! She’s gorgeous!” he defended his love hotly and Jeremy put up his hands.

“I, ah, didn’t mean her. She is a real beauty gav, really. I meant the room. You know look at those DVD’s not even put in their cases.” He pointed and when Gavin’s attention was off him, looked up to Ryan who shrugged. Jeremy had meant the girl but this was Gavin’s thing and he would lie if it meant not ruining the moment for Gavin.

“What do you want Gavin?” Ryan asked, a deep voice behind a silver skull.

“Just erase me, any sign I had been here.” Gavin instructed, looking back to Cynthia. He pulled his phone again, trying to capture the light around her as he spoke.

“There’s product in the kitchen, I think I bleed a little from my lip onto hers. But don’t disturb her anymore then it takes to get my DNA off her!” he glared at the two who nodded seriously. Ryan ignored Gavin’s photo shoot sending Jeremy back to the car to get Ryan’s kit.

The two worked around the house, gathering Gavin’s things and wiping down any trace Gavin had been here. There was nothing Ryan could do about the blood splatter indicating someone had sat next to her as she died, but there was no way it could be traced back to Gavin. They left the gun in her lap where it had fallen, none of them had touched it, her fingerprints all anyone would find, the trail untraceable.

Ryan hit the back of Jeremy’s head when he had paused, licking his lips, staring at Gavin as the brit was taking close up shots of Cynthia’s face.

“Mind on the job.” He warned and Jeremy bowed his head, getting back to work. Ryan looked over at Gavin and knew what had caught Jeremy’s attention. Gavin’s eyes were spotlights to the serial killers, almost blinding with passion for his hobby. Ryan loved his crew and so they were safe from him but Jeremy had yet to perform his own kill, still learning to bring the light out and watching Ryan end their toys.

It was a dangerous time and Ryan stayed close to his apprentice even outside of work. It’s why Jeremy and Ryan weren’t part of the beat down, Ryan suggesting they take clean up. He didn’t think Jeremy had the control too stop.

His friends informed him they were done and Gavin felt disappointment wash over him. This was it, it was over. She had been wonderful, but now she was gone. He shook away the sadness, reminding himself of how it felt, guiding her, instructing her to kill herself. He tossed his phone to Jeremy who knew what he wanted. Gavin posed, both hands throwing up peace signs around Cynthia’s head and grinning for the camera.

He got his phone back and Ryan guided the two lads out, taking with them everything they used to clean and all traces of Gavin. He made sure to lock the door behind them and herded the two talkative guys into the back of his car where Gavin wouldn’t shut up, describing in detail for Jeremy how it had gone down. Gavin was riding a high and Jeremy hung on every word happily. Ryan got in the front, adjusting the rear-view mirror, watching the two trade words, and he sighed knowing he would have to give Jeremy a kill and soon.

He took Gavin straight to Alex as instructed and the gent tended Gavin’s injuries best he could with the bouncing brit. They all put up with it, knowing the next few days, Gavin would be incorrigible. It was the price they payed, putting up with him irritating the fuck out of everyone. Whatever made him happy.

The crew love him and as Gavin snuggled into the couch between his lads, the gents lining up behind him to see his photo show, he felt it very strongly indeed. These guys would die for him and he for them. More importantly, they accepted him completely, everything about him. That’s what made them family.

Michael was the one who brought him the paper, two days later. It had taken that long for her boss to decide to come to her house and abuse her for missing shifts. Though it seemed an open shut suicide, the police weren’t yet willing to close the case. Apparently there was some evidence she hadn’t been alone that night. No other evidence could be found besides the blood splatter but the police were keeping an eye out.

Gavin hugged the article to his chest, grinning at Michael who smiled back.

“You’re news gav!” he said and Gavin nodded then grabbed Michaels hand. They got up and Gavin lead him to his room, having his friend sit on the bed. Gavin then went into his cupboard, clothes falling out all over but Gavin ignoring it, reaching high and snagging a binder from the top. He brought it down and turned to Michael.

“Don’t tell the others where it is k?” he asked and Michael nodded. Gavin brightened again and sat next to him, reverently opening the book, showing Michael page after page of news articles. Occasionally there was a keepsake of some kind, some hair, some shrapnel, a piece of frayed rope. When Michael asked Gavin had traced a piece of blood flecked fabric.

“Sometime’s, not often, I got to check out the scene after they were gone. If I could, I’d snag something.” He explained then continued on. Michael didn’t try to count the pages but Gavin was approaching the middle. He turned a page and Michael saw Gavin had printed out some choice pictures of Cynthia, framing a page with a space in the middle. In that space, Gavin tore around the article then placed it in its spot of honour, gluing it down. He sighed peacefully, tracing a finger around Cynthia’s face.

“I tell you Michael. She was the best so far.” He breathed and Michael put an arm around his friend, touched by the intensity in that golden voice.

“that’s the cool thing though Gavin.” Michael said, Gavin looking to him, “She’s the best, _so far._ Just wait for this one.” He pointed at the blank page opposite, knowing instinctively not to touch Gavin’s book.

Gavin looked at the blank page, mind already beginning to turn over the possibilities.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So hope you enjoyed that, if you didn't that's cool too. Let me know in the comments what you thought, kudos allways apreicated and any ideas let me know. I got a few ones both sudgested and my own that im kicking about. I'm trying to decide between Micheal next or trevor and matt combo, both not as long as this one but still good if i say so myself. Stay tuned because our favorite killer combo will be coming back shortly!


	6. Geoff's one rule

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Geoff supports all his crews little side hobbies. In return they not only respect his rule but even help him enforce it. The shattered group of misfits might not personally care, But they knew Geoff did and not only was he their friend but their boss. So of course They'll help him, trying to keep the one tiny sliver of human decency alive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So i was having a hard time coming up with geoff's thing. then it came to me that geoff's thing didn't have to be dark. Just the opposite. Geoff's thing could be he's the only one with something that get's under his skin.  
> So there is very mild implied refrance too kids being used by adults, (spoiler) thats not in this story. Geoff (and I) don't like it and refuse to go there. So instead we're going on a little adventure too sort out geoff's pet peeve.  
> this will be countined in an arc or at least a second part  
> oh lastly GanglyLimbs, thanks for the Mask idea and LibbyBell i've seized the rabbit hole quote with both hands lol

Geoff was a god and used his favoured five to work his will.

Alex was his right hand man, the first convert to the religion of Geoff. A loyal and trustworthy man Geoff was pleased to call friend. He didn’t care about Alex’s faults, the little quirk that had the gentle gangster needing a separate property to visit on occasion. Just that he did his job.

Geoff was the boss, Alex his manager and then they needed a someone who could get the information they needed. Someone that could break a person, siphon off whatever Geoff wanted and dispose of the body. So they caught Vagabond together.

Next was muscle. A surprise that it came in the form of a boy faced man with rage issues. Michael Mogar Jones had been building a rep but the first Geoff knew about him was from a fight. Michael had pulverised his opponent, everyone shrinking back from him as he roared. Geoff had hired him on the spot. When Geoff found out about the kids odd habit, he didn’t drop him like Michael had expected. It endeared him to Geoff in ways the boss never meant for Michael to understand.

Boss, manager, torturer and muscleman. Hacker came next and Gavino free fit the bill. Alex had a hard time digging up some background on the British tech expert but he got there in the end. They read up on his case file, did some background check and wisely decided he was to be gagged until they knew how effective his power would be on them. Once the gag came off, they could never shut him up again. So Geoff kept it handy. Just in case.

Jeremy was a surprise. He had worked as part of the backup team for a year, during the hiring of Gavin and Michael, unnoticed. He worked well with his fellows and Lindsay, Geoff’s chosen administrator for his empire, sung praises about all three. But it was Jeremy’s expertise they needed to round out the group. A sniper and an infiltrator of finesse.

They had worked well together for over a year, bonding and growing close, sharing themselves and finding fellow shattered souls to confide in. It was hard to define, the love they had for each other. It was friend, family, lover, partners, crewman all rolled into one.

They were all broken pieces but when they came together, they were whole.

Geoff had only one line. Just one. A line that was drawn from a blacked out hole in his memory where the faint cries of a young boy might be heard if Geoff didn’t drown him out first. Geoff did not like people who fucked with kids. So when he heard Roosters were dealing slaves out of their back room, he didn’t give a fuck. But when Alex came to him, solemn, to tell him that the youngest that were being sold were two years old, Geoff got up from his chair.

“Get the guys.” He’d said and Alex had ducked out, half in obedience half in fear of Geoff’s expression.

 

They rolled up in front of Blood Gulch club in Rooster territory. Gavin was bouncing on the seat next to Geoff, Vagabond getting out of the driver’s seat and walking around to open Geoff’s door. Geoff got out, looking up at the garish sign, gritting his teeth.

“So is it true you used to be a rooster Geoff? Way back when I mean? Cause I heard that Big Boss Burn used to be a friend of yours right? So we got to be on the list. Why didn’t you tell me I could come here? Look at it! It’s top it is! Maybe we can come here again, you know if we don’t end up killing everyone here-“ Geoff turned on Gavin who shrank back, cowed, lips falling silent.

“I got your mouth mask Gavin.” He said just once and Gavin mimed locking his lips and throwing away the key. Geoff rolled his eyes and grabbed Gavin’s arm, making sure the young man stayed close as Ryan intimidated them a path through the crowd to the bouncer. Once in front, the beefy man looked up, taking in the grinning Gavin on one side and the tall, clearly masked vagabond other. He spoke to Geoff directly.

“If that’s who I think it is,” he said tipping a pen at the silver mask, “Then that makes you Geoff Ramsey.”

Geoff nodded and the Bouncer looked back to Vagabond briefly then too Geoff.

“I’m so going to fucking regret this either way but you are not on the list.” He said, eyes flickering to Vagabond as that jacket shifted, showing a glint of a gun butt. Gavin made himself noticed, stepping slightly in front of Geoff and leaning over the rope.

“Did you seriously just deny Geoff Fucking Ramsey into your club?” he said quietly, a hint of panic in his voice. The bouncer looked defensive, tightens his shoulders.

“Look, I got orders man. I let you in and next thing I know I got a bullet between my eyes.” Gavin turned to Geoff and Vagabond, smiling and lifting a finger. When he turned back to the bouncer his face was scared and his hypnotic voice desperate.

“If you don’t let us in then they will hold you and I directly responsible.” He put a finger to his chest, eyes wide and open, “Now I don’t want to go in the hole alright? Not again! I Can’t do it!” he tapped the bouncers chest once, tilting his head at him with a tinge of dread on the pleading expression, “Do you?”

The bouncer gulped obviously wavering and moved towards Gavin like a conspirator. Gavin shuffled a bit more forward, the rope tight against his legs now.

“Look, I don’t want to piss off your boss or his,” the bouncer eyed vagabond nervously, “Friend but see here? Understand my position.”

He showed Gavin his clip board, the in list being flipped up showing the absolutely not allowed in list. Near the top, six names.

Geoffrey Ramsey

Alex Stanley

Mogar Jones

Gavin free

Jeremy ‘Monster truck’ Dooley

Vagabond

Gavin looked as if he was going to be sick. He pushed the board back at the bouncer hissing furiously.

“Do not let them see that! Who the fuck is Shannon and why is their name higher then Geoff’s? Whatever doesn’t matter. What matters is you let us in right now.” The bouncer teetered but Gavin’s final words decided him.

“What’s more frightening to you? A bullet, or the Hole?”

The rope clinked as the bouncer undid it. Geoff strolled past Gavin who shuddered theatrically as both gents past him, falling into step meekly behind Vagabond. Once out of sight of the bouncer, Gavin hooked his elbow through Geoff’s arm.

“Who’s the best? I’m the best!”

“Gavin, good job but shut it.” Geoff scanned the club, looking for a way to the back room. Gavin pulled out his phone to warn his boi about the speed bump to get in, yelping when Geoff started pulling him through the crowd, Ryan on their heels. Geoff made his way to the VIP section where a man looked down at them from the balcony before turning out of sight.

The bouncer at the bottom tried to stop them but, with the music thumping so loud tampering with Gavin’s skill, it was Ryan’s turn to get them through. He stood up, toe to toe with the hired help, dead eyes glaring at them through the skull mask. A hand twitched and then they were waved through, the bouncer holding up his hands, sorry he had ever reached for his gun as a hunting knife nicked his throat.

As the two others started climbing, the skull mask kept the knife pressure on as their other hand stole his personal weapon. One handed, Vagabond ejected the clip then cocked it twice, to get rid of the bullet in chamber. There was a mute clatter as the gun hit the ground and the knife disappeared. Vagabond patted the bouncer on the cheek twice then stepped by him, taking stairs two at a time to catch up with his group. The bouncer slid away hoping he could change his wet pants before he fled the wrath of Burns.

Up top, the body guards let Gavin and Geoff by without even a courtesy once over, Gavin’s smooth reasoning convincing them it was unnecessary. Vagabond was only two steps behind and though no amount of golden tongue would convince anyone this man wasn’t carrying, they decided to let him past. They were hired help for the club and not ready to die for a gang boss.

“Geoff! Dude, how are you?” A spectacled man sat on a red couch, arms up on the back of it. A blonde woman sat tucked into his side, her cat like eyes sharp, scanning the three as they approached. An older Latino man sat on the right, just down from the glasses guy, his legs folded at the knee and his hands resting on it. To the left a larger man stood, his hands folded, hugging his elbows, dark hair, dark goatee and dark eyes looking them up and down.

Geoff held up a hand, silencing Gavin before he could speak. The boss of FAKEAH crossed his arms and gave each man a nod as he greeted them.

“Burns” glasses, “Gus.” Latino, “Caboose.” Dark eyes.

The dark eyed guy dropped his arms and flopped his hands dramatically.

“Come on Geoff? Seriously? You get drunk one time and-“ Burns gave the same silencing gesture Geoff had given gavin.

“He knows your name Joel, he’s just teasing.” Burns grinned, shifting so his arm fell on the blonde womans shoulders and motioning with the other.

“So what brings you to visiting us? With your cute little friends no less.” He said condescendingly and Gus gave a sneer.

“Nice mask, it’s july though, not October. Jackass.” Vagabond made no response but Geoff frowned and Gavin spoke up.

“Mind your words there, granddad, or you’ll regret them.” He threatened, bristling up at the joke these guys were trying to turn them into. Geoff didn’t look back, just pulled fabric, gold and shiny from his pocket and passed it to Gavin who turned grey before he put it in his own pocket.

“I didn’t come here to tread on any toes Burns. I just want to check out the little sale you got going on tonight.”

Burns put on a good show of looking confused but he layered it on a little thick.

“Sale? What sale? Gus, you organise a sale for tonight?” he looked to his second, who hadn’t stopped deadpan staring at Geoff.

“No boss. No sale tonight.” He answered and Burns lifted a hand helplessly.

“There you have it. Good talk, great to see ya,” friendly tone turned dangerous and threatening, “get off my property.” Geoff didn’t shift, staring Burns down.

“We got information that there’s a sale tonight. All buyers welcome. I just want to explore a new avenue of business.” Burns sighed and lifted his hand to point.

“Look, I said there is no sale. So there’s no sale. Guess you’re not welcome.” Geoff snapped his fingers and Gavin came forward pulling a bag from his pocket. It was small, plastic and filled with a fine powder. Burns sat up, the woman shifting to avoid being dislodged, taking the packet from Gavin. He rolled it around in his fingers, searching for lumps and when he didn’t find any looked up at Geoff.

“Finest blow you’ll ever have Burns.” Geoff assured him and gestured at the drink table, “This is a gift, 100 grams taste test. Try it out.”

The blonde woman got up, the peep of a thigh holster visible for only a moment under her golden tight dress as she walked away. She came back quickly, a plate and two straws in her hands. Burnie served up two lines and offered Geoff a straw.

“You first, Ramsey.”

Geoff shrugged and knelt down, taking the offered straw. He did one line and a few moments later so did Burns, both Bosses rocking back as they felt the effects hit them. Meanwhile, Vagabond had turned into a staring competition with Joel and Gus glared at Gavin as the lad swayed, smiling and giving a little wave from his hips.

“So, what’s the offer?” Burns asked, getting back up onto his seat with a slight sniff and a rub of his nose. Geoff straightened up, giving his own nostril a quick wipe.

“Four kilo’s get’s me and my associates here in to the sale.”

“Six kilo’s gets you and twink there. He’s not going in.” Burns said, gesturing to vagabond. Geoff motioned to Gavin.

“This is my accountant and negotiator.” He tilted a head at Ryan, “this is my bodyguard. They stick with me.” Burns chuckled, the affects of the drugs making him more loose.

“We all know about your little pet monster there. If he goes in you’re going to make my other buyers nervous. And nervous buyers tend to scamper.”

“Vagabond goes where I go. Eight kilo’s.”

“Twelve.”

“Ten.”

“Eleven.”

“Nine.” Burns frowned at the last number, Geoff giving him his serious face. Burns threw up his hands, slumping back into the couch.

“Fine! But you sit in the back and you do not make waves understand?” Geoff grinned lazily at burns, spreading his arms open.

“Please, when have I ever made waves?” he asked and despite his irritation Burns chuckled. He shook his head fondly and flicked his head at Gus who rolled his eyes, pulling out a phone.

“Doll face will take you out back. I expect my blow delivered here, tomorrow night, eight o’clock.” Geoff nodded and a Purple headed woman in a silver dress came up the stairs. Her glasses glinted in the light and she shot them a smile. She looked to her bosses for instruction and Gus pointed at the three.

“get those fucking assholes to the sale.” He ordered and she tipped her head, turning and gesturing for them to follow her. Gavin almost tripped over himself, enchanted by the girl before she had said a word. Geoff paused before he left, vagabond waiting for him as he turned to Burns.

“It was good to see you guys again. All of you,” he included Joel and Gus in his look then back to Burns, “Really and truly Burns. We should start burying the hatchet. Talk it out. Maybe even become friends.”

“Matt was your friend Geoff. Remember him?” Burns said softly and Geoff’s face closed over, message received. He followed Gavin and the purple haired doll face down the stairs, Vagabond a comforting and strengthening presence behind him.

Gavin and doll face, pressed close together, Geoff seeing their lips move but not hearing the words as she guided them through the nosier parts of the club. There was some sort of disturbance bleeding in through the entrance but they ignored it. Geoff pulled out his phone, sending directions to the back room, doll face leading them into a corridor then down some stairs, pausing before a door at the end of another hall.

“Here you are. Just knock and enter, take your place and the sale will begin at eleven.” She said pleasantly to Geoff and tipped a wink at Gavin before she swayed away, all hips back down the hall. Gavin’s eyes followed her until Geoff stepped into his line of sight.

“Right, yep. Got it.” Gavin said, straitening his tie and knocking on the door. He grabbed the handle and opened it for Geoff. The three entered a large room, a raised stage built in on one end and comfortable chairs in rows before it. To the sides were nibble food and Alcohol being served by meek men and women dressed as waiters with a glittering collar around their neck in the Rooster crew colours.

Geoff found himself a seat, ignoring the other buyers, Vagabond sitting on one side, Gavin the other. He leant back and sent Gavin off to get him a drink. The two gents sat in silence, Vagabond scanning for threats, Geoff trying to separate buyers from sellers. Gavin came back, a double whiskey in his hand for Geoff and a familiar face by his side.

Jeremy had dyed his hair normal, shaved his face and wore contacts. His now hazel brown eyes sparkled at them and something seemed off about him. Then it clicked and Geoff grinned back.

“You’re taller.” He said and Jeremy blushed slightly.

“Miracle of footwear. No one’s recognised me yet, how’d you go getting in?” he asked and Geoff shrugged his head at Gavin and Jeremy nodded.

“Well, Michael and Alex had a bit of a harder time. Some bouncer tried to stop them and Michael lost his temper. Alex said he’d try again when everyone had calmed down and he could get Michael a hat or something. Probably got the same message on your phone come to think of it.” Geoff didn’t bother checking just drawing his infiltrators eye to the people settling in and chatting to one another.

“Who’s our Naughty seller?’ he asked and Jeremy looked around with a small defensive shrug.

“I know there’s only two of items of interest being sold tonight. They belong to the same seller, a rep from the Crackerjacks crew. I haven’t found him yet. I’ll keep looking.” He promised and with a nod from his boss, strolled away into a small group of four, smiling friendly and shaking hands. Geoff let Gavin go soon after, the sweet talker anxious to mingle. Before he fully left however, Geoff grabbed his wrist.

“Remember. This is work, not play. Leave Jeremy be, this is his area alright so don’t mess with that.” Gavin tried to keep disappointment from his face but he nodded. Geoff let him go and Gavin wadded in to the rapidly increasing crowd. Geoff glanced at Vagabond, noticing that even with the mask facing forwards Ryan was watching Jeremy.

“Is he good?” Geoff asked a little concerned that he was messing up Jeremy’s journey with his personal quest. The mask tipped in a nod subtly and Ryan’s voice rumbled out.

“he can help me milk this seller then we might take a few days off. He needs a kill soon.” Geoff tried to understand, waving a hand and taking a drink of his whiskey. He made a face, the brand off but it was all he had so he took another sip before speaking.

“Hey we may get into trouble here, shoot our way out. that’s how these things normally end isn’t it?” Ryan flicked his dead eyes to Geoff.

“Not the kind of kill he’s craving.” Ryan pointed out then went back to watching his apprentice after every security scan he did. Geoff let it drop, a comfortable silence between them. Geoff was good for men like Ryan. He never pressed to hard, never force them to change. He just accepted Ryan knew what was best and let him work to his strengths.

There was a murmur of voices and a man strolled onto centre stage. He was lithe and in a manly way, beautiful with long dark locks falling around his shoulders.

“Ladies, gentleman, esteemed guest and staff. We are almost ready to start this sale off. Now I know your used to our lovely Barbara running these auctions, but unfortunately she couldn’t be here tonight.” His voice was captivating, almost as honeyed as Gavin’s, the brit making his way back to his seat as the beautiful man continued to speak.

“For those who don’t know me, and I’m sure there’s a few who don’t,” titters from the crowd as he gave a wide smile, “My name is Jon and I will be your host for this evening. I hope you bare with me, I normally do art, the kind that hangs on walls.” Another round of chuckles and he clapped his hands together.

“But tonight we have a few choice pieces of human art to practically give away!” there were applause and Jon raised his hands to quiet it. He went on to say they were giving a ten-minute warning before they started, last chance to eat, drink and go to the bathroom. Geoff missed most of the speech as Gavin slid into the chair next to him, talking before he even settled.

“J is up front, found himself a nice couple that he’s getting in tight with.” Geoff didn’t notice any physical change in Ryan but he felt a cold heat come from the Masked mercenary at Gavin’s words. Gavin continued oblivious.

“Alex and Michael got in last minute. Alex said he didn’t think he was recognised. Their four rows up from us. Also, Jeremy found out that the sellers are the ones who hand over the prizes, rooster just renting the space and staff.” Geoff nodded and handed Gavin his empty glass for the man to fill before the sale started. While Gavin was gone, Slaved waiters handed out paddles too the various buyers. The slaves were very well trained, Geoff had to admit, not flinching from Ryan as they bent over him to hand Geoff his paddle.

Geoff saw Joel enter and walk up the sides, pulling himself onto the stage and disappearing behind the curtains. He wondered but he didn’t wonder long as the lights dimmed and the curtain opened. Jon stood at a podium, a microphone in front of him and a bell. A woman was also on stage, naked and looking down as Joel stood looking bored holding a chain attached to her collar.

“Ok! Welcome! We’re ready to get started. Before we begin though can we have a round of applause for the generous Joel Heyman for helping us out!” he started the clapping and Joel smiled and gave a small wave. Jonathan turned back to the audience with a grin.

“Our normal handler will be back momentarily so don’t get too used to his handsome face.” Geoff rolled his eyes as the audience laughed, the women simpering. He leant too Ryan so he could mutter, “Wonder where they’re normal handler is?”

Ryan shrugged and Geoff looked back to the stage. It was a boring show for him. He didn’t care about slavery, not dealing in it himself because live cargo needed to be shifted constantly and was too high maintenance. He enjoyed their simple life, making and distributing drugs, trading in weaponry and heisting.

The woman sold quickly, Jon taking note of the buyer and the slave was shuffled off to the side. Jonathan bantered back and forth with Joel for the crowd’s amusement until a faceless extra brought up the next item. Then it was through the motions again, Jon trying to bring the price up by praising the piece and playing buyers against each other.

During the third slave’s auction, Geoff’s interest was caught again. Joel giving a sigh of relief as a young, extremely muscled man jogged onto the stage and took the chain from his hand. They shook hands firmly then Joel waved goodbye as Jon saw him out with a joke and introduced the normal handler.

“Welcome, welcome Blaine, good to see ya.” He said and Blaine grinned, greeting Jon back.

“Better late than never,” Jon said for comedic effect. Blaine blushed and the sale went on, loosing Geoff’s attention once more. Only the ding of the bell indicating a sale brought him back long enough to see wither they were selling what he was interested in.

“Geoff, Jeremy texted me.” Gavin said, cutting in through the fog. He handed his boss his phone to read the texts.

_J: Mr and Mrs. here are after the younger set._

_J: Suggest we let them buy and follow to the exchange._

Geoff felt a flush of heat at the thought of these two assholes buying children, swallowing the rest of his whiskey in one large gulp to drown out the young boys cries in his head. He nodded once to Gavin who took back his phone and sent out a reply too Jeremy.

They took a short break, Jon informing them to be back in twenty.

Gavin left to go check in with the others and Geoff stared at the paddle in his hands.

“You need to raise that when we get back.” Ryan suggested and Geoff looked up at him.

“We haven’t bid once. It’s suspicious. Find a type and start bidding on it. Make us seem choosey instead of broke or shady.” Geoff sat up straighter and waved a slave waiter over to fetch him just plain water. When it came, Ryan put his hand over the rim, stoping Geoff from drinking it.

“Ask Gavin to get you one. That Joel guy is behind the stage curtain, watching us.” Geoff frowned and tipped the water out onto the wooden floors, putting the glass down and shoving it with his foot away from him.

Gavin returned and groaned when he was sent off for water. He came back quickly, jumping into his chair.

“so guess who I just saw!” he said and Geoff rolled his eyes.

“Ok, ok, no need to bloody shout. Lawrence and James!” Gavin started sarcastically but enthusiasm won out.

“What?!” Geoff silently exploded, sitting straight and giving Gavin his full attention as the Lad nodded in time to his bouncing.

“I told him our story, checking out a possible new trade, see if it’s worth it, blah, blah. Lawrence said they’re here on a hit and if they had known you were here, they would have given the heads up.” Geoff shrugged his tone making it sound obvious when he said, “Yeah, vice versa.”

“So Lawrence said they won’t get in our way if we don’t get in there’s and I hope it’s cool but I agreed.”

“Did he saw who, when and where?”

“Geoff, please. As if he would tell anyone that.”

“Gavin...” Geoff's voice dipped warningly and Gavin grinned wider.

“Some rich asshole buying up a bunch of sex slaves to keep on his boat away from his wife. They’re gonna get him after the show. James is really excited about it apparently; he couldn’t sit still.” Gavin jittered on his seat and even Ryan gave a semi audible groan at Gavin's persistent excitement.

The sale restarted and Geoff took Ryan’s advice, raising the paddle whenever there was a man with black hair and green eyes. He made sure not to win, not wanting to throw money at a toy when they could take their own for free. He sighed out thinking to himself, honestly, slave trade was the most useless trade ever.

Finally Jon stepped up to the podium, rubbing his hands together, a wide grin inviting the audience to share his excitement.

“Ladies and gentleman, we have only few more pieces left and I gotta say, we are starting high.” He gestured dramatically and Blaine walked out holding the hands of two young boys. Thankfully they were clothed but their heads were down, not looking at the crowd.

“That’s right, we don’t just have twins, we have six-year-old identical twins. Come on boys, smile for our guests, they’re here to see you.” He encouraged and the boys looked up briefly. Geoff grabbed the soft arms of his padded chair, knuckles white as inside he heard screaming. Gavin gave him a steady look, face expressionless. Geoff narrowed his eyes and Gavin looked away, forgetting the momentary weakness that drew him. It was safer that way.

Geoff got his rage under control as the sale went on. Not many bided for the boys but the few who did bet high. Gavin disappeared from his seat Ryan informed Geoff that their sweet talker was going to each person who put up a paddle and whispering something. One by one the Buyers dropped out until only the couple next to Jeremy had a paddle up. The bell was hit hard by Jon his enthusiasm something to behold.

“Sold! To the beautiful woman in the black suede dress. Gorgeous choice in dress and wonderful taste in art.” Jon complemented and Blaine led the kids offstage to ready the next item. Geoff didn’t care, Gavin sliding back into his seat with a satisfied expression and a twinkling eye.

“I need to know who bought them and who is selling. Where’s it going down and when?” he ordered softly and Gavin set to work, getting information from Jeremy as he sweet talked the couple then using the best phone money could buy spliced with his own programming and alterations to get everything Geoff could ever want on the couple.

Those twins were the only under twenty sold that night. They had sat through thirty items, some bundles like the kids had been. None of the FAKEAH worried or cared about any of the items. Their hearts were hardened, minds shattered in unique ways that left no room for sympathy for anyone outside that inner circle. Geoff was the only one to carry a sliver of conscious and his crew that were also family, supported him through that as he did their darkness.

Jon wrapped up the sale and dropped down to mingle in the crowd, giving details of drops and pickups as he did so. Geoff stood and Ryan stood with him. Gavin stayed seated but they left him behind staring and typing at his phone. Geoff was heading towards Jonathan when Ryan grabbed his arm and tugged him in a different direction.

“What’s the danger?” Geoff inquired and the mask was scanning the crowd rapidly.

“Got to get you too Mogar. Jeremy is gone and so are his marks.” Ryan said quickly, dumping his boss into the protective circle that Michael and Alex formed. The two were incognito and were surprised when Geoff approached them with vagabond behind him.

“Jeremy is AWOL.” Ryan said quickly and Michael stepped up, taking Ryan’s place at Geoff's side as Alex nodded. They were Geoff's bodyguards now.

Ryan left them to sort out the change of plans, heading straight to the bathrooms to become invisible. Once inside a stall, he pulled his mask off and slid it under his shirt. He took off his jacket and pulled a mirror out, wipes from the other and set about cleaning his face. Once he looked normal, he dumped everything into the sharps waste bin near the sinks as he headed out. He was dressy casual and now unrecognisable. He trusted his instincts that told him the couple were most likely swingers, trying to impress a young handsome man. As such he put an ear to the doors in the hallway until he heard a familiar voice speaking as someone chuckled and a woman moaned.

“You are so bright. Did anyone ever tell you that? So shiny and full of passion. Both of you.”

“Jackson, stop... we can’t do this here. We have our boys to pick up.” A woman groaned and a man spoke breathlessly.

“You’re a prize in and of yourself Jackson.” A sultry grunt and the sounds of wet kissing.

“You’re so full. You both are so full. I love it.” He heard Jeremy say and Ryan heard the eager tone that had nothing to do with sex in his apprentices voice.

“Ow, not so hard.” A woman complained

Ryan opened the door and shut it behind him, taking in the scene. It was a smaller room obviously used to store access furniture. On a three seater couch, Jeremy sat in the middle, the couple twisted around him. He had his face in the man’s neck and  he was gripping the woman’s arm tightly, her hand trying to loosen his grip.

Ryan fixed his face to apologetic even as he felt the rage roar up inside him. He cocked a thumb at the door, his other hand in his pocket.

“Oh sorry, should I go?” he said, Jeremy finally pulling himself away from the males neck at Ryan’s voice. Their eyes met and Jeremy flushed, disentangling himself from the two.

“Don’t mind us, we were just looking for somewhere private.” He said and Ryan nodded, pointing at a stack of the comfortable chairs similar to the other room.

“Well I was sent in to get those so...” the man adjusted his collar and helped his wife up from the couch.

“We were just leaving. Come on dear, Jackson. We have our items to collect.” He said firmly, his nose high at what he considered the ‘help’. He took his wives hand and Jeremy tucked his arm around the males waist. Ryan stepped to the side, both hands in his pockets now, letting them pass. Jeremy dared look up into Ryan’s friendly open face and swallowed hard when he saw the fury behind those blue eyes.

They left and Ryan pulled his phone, texting Alex to inform him that Jeremy was heading to collect the kids but Ryan was no longer vagabond. They were facing their own problems in the sales room.

“Where is your pet Geoff?” Joel asked the muscled Blaine at his side. Alex and Michael were flanking Geoff as he acted innocent.

“Dunno. What can I say, he’s a free spirit.” He said and Joel gave a little chuckle, taking a step into Geoff's personal space.

“that’s funny. Your real funny Geoff. But your little pet is missing, we can’t get eyes on him anywhere. And then I hear there’s a body in the little boys room. Got a joke about that huh?”

“Guy dies on a toilet. Practically writes itself doesn’t it?”

“He died at the urinal Geoff. Drowned in it.” Joel delivered the news, boredom in his voice. Behind Geoff Michael fought back a chuckle and even Alex felt a smile. Geoff was cursing their luck that Funhaus had to perform a hit here, tonight, of all times and places. Geoff wasn’t going to snitch out their closest allies however so he set his face to innocent, waiting Joel out.

“Whatever. Burns wants you out and his twelve kilo’s of blow tomorrow morning. He added for the price of cleanup.” Joel said, waving a hand and stepping back. Geoff tilted his head so he could see Alex who nodded subtly.

“Ok Joel, we’re not here to cause waves remember.”

“Yeah fine, whatever. Just get out of here will you before I get ordered to do something. I want to go to bed at some sort of decent time tonight.” Joel let them go, Geoff hitting Gavin's head on the way out, the British man jumping up at the command and following.

“Jeremy better have some good god dam info.” Geoff muttered as they made their way out. Jeremy and Ryan were nowhere to be seen but that was to be expected. They took the exit they came in from, a new bouncer at the door, a bloodstain on the cement no one seemed worried about.

Alex opened the door for Geoff when their car was brought around and he jumped in the driver’s seat. Gavin and Michael, were taking Alex’s car home. Once Geoff was in the back of the car he finally checked his phone. He deleted all old messages then called up Lindsay to hand over the task of getting the blow too Burns. She said she’d put Matt on it, the little thief the best in the business. Matt was going to take a small team in and Burns would find all twelve kilo’s stacked neatly on his VIP couch with no one able to tell him when or who someone put it there.

Geoff tried to be satisfied with that but his fist was clenched as he gazed out the window at the lights of Los Santos. He wanted that Crackerjack Rep. He wanted to go after not just the seller but the provider. Was it Just the Crackerjacks? How many kids had they taken? Was it up the top of the crew or just a side business run by a administrator? Geoff didn’t know and he didn’t care.

He only had one rule whether people knew about it or not.

Don’t fucking mess with kids.

Inside Geoff a young child screamed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK so, hand slipped again and it became the Jeremy show for a tad sorry about that. I'll get a kill in him so he get's back under control. But what you think? comments and kudos apreciated :)   
> I know their american but i have no idea of the system used there for weight so i used my own countries sorry. Also never done drugs so going with what i've read and seen on tv shows for value, effects etc again i'm open to sudgestions so hit me up in the comments if you want to point out anything :)  
> Untill next time!


	7. Michaels Kink

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A quick look at how Michael joined the team and learnt a lesson regarding Ryan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is set in the time between when michael fist joined to just before Jeremy found his thrill. I did want to put up Jeremy's first kill but after rereading both chapters i realised this kinda had to come first.  
> Rape and more torture coming up (torture implied not in detail)  
> there's your warning now read on and enjoy or not depending on what you like.  
> (incase anybody sees the link, i do watch dexter and it was a fasinating show that definitly inspired parts of the killer mentality in this story)

Michael ‘Mogar’ Jones was the meanest son of a bitch you would ever meet. He trained hard, toning up, trying to make his lithe and baby faced body into a weapon to be feared. If someone was causing you trouble, you called Mogar. If you need a few heads bashed in as a message, You call Mogar. If you wanted a streetwise, no fucking nonsense muscle to guard your back. You call motherfucking Mogar.

Geoff found Mogar for himself for once. Normally Alex brought perspectives to Geoff, the interview process brutal. This time however, Geoff was out with Ryan, helping the man pick his newest toy, not enough busy work to satisfy Ryan’s craving at the time. Geoff had noticed the curly redhead when they had walked in. How could he not? The man was resting a steel baseball bat by his thigh.

It was only when Ryan was debating between a soft delectable guy, drinking his woes at the bar or the tough fighter of a woman, glaring about from behind the bar did their attention come back to the baby-faced bodyguard with the sneering expression. A guy was drunkenly yelling, something about some bitch that was his that the redheads boss had fucked. Standard procedure was what the guy adhered too, using his bat like a herding stick, each end in each hand across the drunk’s chest, pushing him away from the client.

Then shit went down.

The drunk smashed a fist into Boy face who instantly bristled, face turning red with rage. He shoved the drunk back, hands sliding down the bat like a lover before he swung, screaming profanities. Metal hit a defensive arm so hard, the crack was heard above the music. Baby face shoved the drunk again, the guy falling over the short banister onto the dance floor which quickly cleared as the furious bodyguard leapt over, landing on his feet.

He paced around the guy, screaming and asking questions that didn’t expect answers, bringing the bat down again and again. The music cut out and bouncers started to swarm but were stopped in shock at the scene. Geoff split into a wide grin and he felt more then saw Ryan stiffened behind him as they came for a closer look.

The drunk guy was dead, or wished he would be. The bat had made short work of bone’s, the crumpled mess resembling less a person and more a pile of broken mattresses. Still the guy circled, screaming for the drunkard to get up. To fight him. Say something.

Geoff decided too instead, taking a step into the no man zone between the gore splattered man child and the party goers.

“Hey, kid what’s your name?” Geoff asked and Ryan, behind his mask, stood at his left arm, tall and intimidating. People recognised them and a murmur spread through the dance floor. The baby faced guy wasn’t caring however, lifting his splattered bat into his hands again.

“the fuck do you care?” He spat and Geoff gave a lazy chuckle then beckoned him to follow them.

“Come with us, and you’ll be a part of the FAKEAH kid.”

“Mogar. I’m Fucking Mogar bitch, remember it.” Since this was a first meet and there was a dead guy between them and an antsy serial killer behind Geoff, the Boss let the bitch thing slide. With a final spit on the cooling corpse, Mogar stepped over the mess and followed Geoff through the crowd which split before them.

Michael had joined the gang.

It was about six months in when Michael was finally busted. Sure, they had noticed little things like patches of hair missing or a bruise across his face. The crew just thought he was beating in people’s faces on his own time, letting him be. He never brought the police down on himself or them unlike Vagabond who was known all throughout the county. He didn’t work on his pet project like Gavin did over work hours, the British man having a burner phone for his ‘friends’ to call him in crisis.

Alex kept his own darkness mostly to themselves.

So if Michael was beating down innocent people, as long as he obeyed Geoff’s golden rule, ‘No kids’ they didn’t care.

Then the gents had been out together to the club. Gavin was off gallivanting around with one of his new finds, a secretary whose boss was getting handsy. Michael had disappeared as was his want every few weeks. This left the guys to their own devises and Geoff had suggested a strip club. Geoff got unbelievably hammered, No dancer dared approach the skull mask and Alex enjoyed himself, treating himself to a double dance.

Ryan was in a pretty good mood, his last kill having been mere days ago, a sanctified gang kill of a dirty cop turned squealer. He watched over Geoff, giving Alex time to enjoy himself for once and when it came time to go home, He had a gent leaning on either shoulder. Albeit Geoff needed a lot more support.

Heading to the car they heard it. They were going to keep walking, this was los Santos, rapes happen all the time but Ryan’s sober ears heard the voice that caught in a sob. He went cold, his dark self in the driver’s seat, shoving Geoff at Alex and stalking towards the alley. Two men had someone against the dumpster, clearly enjoying themselves despite the weak moans of denial.

“Hurry up Mark, I want a turn.” The second one hissed at the first.

“Look at these hips! So fucking soft. Look the bitch is hard!” The first muttered as Ryan stalked closer.

“Please, no. Stop.” A familiar voice groaned and the second guy hit the weak struggling person in the face. The moment He saw those curls flop over the thrusting guys shoulder, Ryan knew he wasn’t mistaken. He drew his hunting knife and they were dead so quickly, Michael didn’t have time to collapse onto the ground, Ryan scooping him up over his shoulder.

He came back to the other two gents who had been patiently waiting by the car. Alex sucked in a breath when he recognised Ryan’s shoulder package.

“Oh god, Michael! What happened?” the green-eyed guy came forward leaving Geoff to weave on the spot, his eyes blinking slowly trying to clear his sight. Ryan let Alex take Michael tenderly into his arms, then he guided Geoff to his seat. Alex got in the back, Michael sobbing quietly, still out of it, pants gone and shirt torn.

Ryan drove and as he did, he relayed the scene to Alex, Geoff falling asleep on the car window unable to fight off the drugs and alcohol he had voluntarily ingested. Alex’s eyes crinkled in sympathy for the little lad, tucked into his side. They got home to the shared penthouse, Ryan taking Geoff and Alec taking care of Michael. In the morning, Geoff woke first, bolting from his room into Michaels, Alex asleep in a chair by the lads bed.

“Michael! Michael are you ok? O god why on earth did I drink so much?” Geoff cried out and got onto the bed, snuggling close to Michael who was awake and had been for awhile, considering his options. His voice had woken Alex. Alex frowned but he knew how deeply Geoff cared about them all so let it go. Perhaps it would help Michael through this to understand he was loved now.

They were family and they would help him through this.

“Michael? You don’t have to speak just yet. Just know I’m here, and Geoff is here and even Ryan and Gavin can come in if you need us to get them. You got a lot of support here ok?” Michael twisted in Geoff’s arms shoving an angry hand to the gent’s chest, pushing him away and sitting up.

“Look I’m flattered, but this isn’t necessary.” He said, surprising both gents with how normal he sounded. Michael looked between them and sighed, ruffling his curls before he spat out the truth.

“ok, here’s the thing. I like being raped ok?” the truth dropped out of him and he spread his arms, waiting for the judgement to fall.

“S-so... you asked them too...” Alex tried to understand and Michael scoffed looking at him like he was slow.

“No. Of course not. Then it would just be rough sex or roll playing.”

Geoff had caught on now, following Michaels line of thought.

“You go out, tempt guys and hope they drug and follow you?” he asked and Michael nodded, cheeks embarrassed. Geoff let out a sigh and shook his head.

“No. No that’s not gonna cut it Michael. We cannot allow you to flaunt yourself like that.” Michael took comfort in his anger, pointing a finger at his boss.

“Pretty fucking rich coming from you! What? Gavin and Ryan hurt other people but I want to get hurt myself and that’s just sick? Fucking wrong? Fuck you Geoff and fuck this crew!” Michael made to get off the bed but Geoff put a hard hand on Mogar shoulder, the rarely seen serious motherfucking boss Ramsey voice coming out.

“It is wrong you fucking idiot. What if they gave you some god dam disease? What if they didn’t just rape you then leave? What if you were killed? And here’s another one for you, what if Mogar Jones, Warrior Bear of FAKEAH is spotted being made into a slutbitch for some low level gangbangers?! Ever think of that asshole?” Michael got no chance to defend himself as Alex leant forward and spoke.

“Sir?” he asked of Geoff when he was in boss mode. He got a nod and so Alex continued.

“How’s this? We get him thoroughly checked out. make sure there’s no damage, no infections, nothing. Then we fuck him ourselves.” Michaels breath caught then he hardened.

“I don’ want you pity fuck Al! I want-“

“Shut your god dam mouth you piece of shit.” Alex cut him off and Michaels eyes widened, the words exactly what he never considered but always wanted. Alex checked with Geoff real quick and glared at Michael once he had the ok.

“You just keep your god dam whore mouth shut. Adults are talking.” It was the harshest tone Michael had ever heard Alex use but Geoff was grinning to himself, his hooded eyes darting between the two. This would work out perfectly.

It was agreed that after Michael was given the all clear, he would become their cum bucket. Until Michael went to bed, he was normal. Nothing was said about what he needed or what happened behind closed doors. But once his door was shut it was free game. At any point any night, any time without warning someone would knock three times, the only warning they had to give to avoid an unfortunate head blowing off incident, and Michael would be used just like he wanted.

Hard hands would grab him, use him for their own pleasure, neglecting him completely. He was just a hole, a means to an end. The rougher they were the better, sometime Michael struggled just to see them put him in his place. Even B team enjoyed him as they willed, an added caution was they had to text everyone but Michael that they would be entering in the night. Trevor didn’t want another scar after he had walked in to the penthouse share house, surprising Ryan.

When Jeremy was bumped up too A team, Michael was surprised by his dedication to the bit. Jeremy was a bastard in bed. Michael sometimes saying his rarely used safe word when Jeremy bit into him. Sometimes it felt like Jeremy would kill him. Which made Michael wonder, though Ryan liked to shove him about, get him worked up when no one was looking, he had never had a midnight visit from the man. He spoke to Alex about it.

Alex was his favourite. As soft and gentle the caring mocha gangster was, Michael discovered Alex had the best way with words. He didn’t just use Michael, he humiliated him. Michael loved it. Loved Alex’s soft dulcet voice telling him how worthless he was. How useless. How he wasn’t worthy to lick Alex’s toes. In a way, the way Alex satisfied Michael was just another way Alex took care of his crew.

But one day, after talking to Alex about Ryan’s lack of visits, the gent brought it up with Ryan himself. It was just the three of them home when Alex leant over the kitchen counter, Ryan sitting there on the stool eating, Michael at the fridge. His beer dropped and shattered as he heard Alex ask.

“So Ryan, why aren’t you interested in our little slut here? Don’t you want to help the freak out?” Michael shivered, responding to Alex’s words but turned to look at Ryan. The Killer had his mask off, placed beside him but his face had its cover of face paint. Though he spoke to Alex, he kept eye contact with Michael

“I can’t help out. He shines to bright. I’d break him. I wouldn’t mean to but it would happen.” Michael wondered at that, tilting his head but Alex nodded low and serious.

“Fair enough.” He looked to Michael too, “there’s your answer. Don’t press him.”

“Press what? What the fuck does that mean? ‘shine too bright’? the fuck Ryan?” Ryan grinned at him, his eyes widening with excitement.

“Do you want me to show you Michael? I can you know.” Alex shook his head but Michael was never one to back down from a challenge. He nodded his head and grabbed another beer.

“Alright then Ryan. Show me.”

Mad eyes blazed and Michael wondered at Alex’s worried groan.

 

Michael stumbled out the door, feeling oddly drunk, bracing his hands on the couch and breathing hard. The screams became quieter cries then he felt more then heard Ryan approach, the door swinging shut behind him. The older man hunched over Michaels smaller frame, echoing his position onto the lad.

“Was it too much? Did you see?” He asked, his voice almost needy in Michaels ear. Michael shuddered, mind showing him what he had seen down there in that hole. Those same hands now were trailing off the couch side to caress his hips. The blood on the fingers, sticking to Michaels skin where Ryan rucked up his shirt.

“Did you see Michael? Tell me you saw it.” Ryan begged and Michael turned in those strong arms, putting his own firmly on Ryan’s torso.

“I saw a lot of things there Ryan. A lot of fucking things.” He growled out and Ryan’s face fell, his hands still holding onto Michael but not longer roaming.

“You don’t see it.” He murmured disappointment in his tone. Michael felt oddly bad, confused as to what Ryan wanted from him but still feeling guilty. He had never seen Ryan look so human as this moment when the torturer expert realised Michael wasn’t the same as him.

“Sorry rye, I don’t man. I think I might leave the rest up to you.” Michael put in softly and Ryan nodded sadly. He went to step away but a thought came to him and he moved back, crowding Michael against the couch, eyes excited again.

“You like to be used, don’t you?” Ryan asked and the words made Michaels throat swell with need. Ryan’s hands were turning hard and his face was altering into something that actually was frightening the lithe man trapped under him.

“Do you want me to use you? You’ve seen me at work. Now see me at play.” He enticed and Michael stammered not knowing if Ryan meant he wanted to fuck him or hurt him. Or both.

“Ryan! Have you got me my info yet?!” Geoff’s voice cut in, Michaels breath starting to catch as Ryan eyed the line of his neck like it was a buffet just ready to consume.

“I play hard Michael. You like it hard don’t you? Want to be used?” Ryan still spoke directly to him and god dam him but Michael was both turned on, frightened and angry. Geoff was being ignored as Ryan leant forward, putting his lips on Michaels skin, his hips thrusting against him softly.

“I’d use you so hard. If you ask me too.” Ryan whispered and Michael felt his knees weaken, yelping when Ryan bit him hard. Before his teeth could sink too deep, Geoff yanked at Ryan’s shoulder.

“No! Ryan down!” he shouted and Ryan turned towards his boss, eyes mad, teeth bloodied and snarling. Geoff drew his gun in a second and Ryan bobbed his head, eyes rolling as he breathed deep. Tough, strong Mogar Jones didn’t dare move during the faceoff, his hips still being held bruising tight by Ryan’s hands. Blood leaked down from the row of teeth marks in his skin.

Ryan huffed twice then glanced to Michael, letting his hips go and stepping away. Geoff followed him with the barrel until Ryan had backed up a few steps, visibly calmer.

“Sorry. I wouldn’t have killed you Michael.” He said and out of love, all three of them let themselves believe the lie. Geoff brought the gun to his side, watching Ryan as Geoff stepped closer to Michael.

“You ok?” he asked low and Michael nodded, bring a hand up to put pressure on the wound.

“Just a love bite. Not the worst I’ve had.” He brushed it off and Ryan’s eyes grew dark, watching Michael’s hand, blood soaked into the light grey t-shirt Michael wore.

“Ryan.” Geoff said a little louder, his voice strong and firm. Ryan looked to Geoff, seemingly entranced by their boss.

“Go get me my info huh?” Geoff suggested and Ryan gave a short nod, stalking back into the room, someone crying out in fear when he did so. The door shut again and they heard savage roar of words and screams start up.

Geoff now stood in front of Michael, fingers on his chin.

“Sure your ok?” he asked and Michael nodded.

“I’m fine Geoff. He wasn’t going to kill me. You heard him.” He said, and Geoff frowned.

“I don’t want you playing with Ryan.” He ordered and Michael brought his rage to the surface.

“Who the fuck are you to tell me who can fuck me or not? That’s the point isn’t it? I don’t get a fucking say? If he comes into my room then that’s not my choice is it?” Geoff wasn’t buying it, his eyes serious and his voice hard.

“I mean it. If Ryan comes to you then use that god dam gun. Do you hear me? If he comes for you, he sure as shit isn’t going to stop.” Michael looked away angry but feeling the truth of those words. Geoff put a hand on his none injured shoulder.

“Michael, Ryan loves you. He loves us all. But he is not like us. I trust he won’t go knocking alright? He’s got really good control and lets me know when he needs a feed. But we don’t listen to Gavin when high or drunk, we don’t insult you outside the bedroom, we never agree to visit Alex’s place, We let Jeremy work his frustration out in the gym and we sure as shit don’t disobey me! So don’t tempt Ryan understand?” Michael nodded sullen but Geoff shook him so he’d look up.

“Understand?” He asked again and Michael sullenly muttered, “Alright” back.

Still, he liked to wonder and occasionally, he’d visit Ryan when he was working, admiring the pull of muscle as Ryan swung, the curve of flesh as he carved. Sometimes he imagined Ryan looking at him as he had the first time.

Focus and intensity.

Michael craved it.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So now we get what's up with Michael. Mogar is so tough that sometimes he like to be put down like a bitch. who saw that coming? (


	8. Jeremy's kill

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan let's Jeremy take the kill then eases him through the high

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the most nerve racking chapter i've ever posted out of everything i've written. Somwhat because i wanted to get Jeremys first kill just right but mostly because the below contains smut and i've never written smut before. So yeah, Warning for torture, murder, biting and choking, male on male rough sex, etc  
> I'm hoping you guys will like but but as always, enjoy or not i'm not the boss of you.

The Crackerjack rep had given up everything Geoff wanted very quickly. He was barely broken after telling Geoff anything he wanted to know so, with his boss’s permission, Ryan had taken him home for Jeremy to play with.

It was time again and Jeremy was shaking with anticipation. Ryan had agreed to let him do it this time. He paced as Ryan arranged their doll into position. It was a bit hard as limbs and joints bent in all the wrong places, the toy beyond screaming anymore, just a constant whining moan. When they lay flat on their back upon the bed, in no way restrained, their broken body trapping them better than any rope could, Ryan stood up. He put his hands-on Jeremy’s shoulder, stilling his trembles as the young killer tore his eye’s from his victim laying almost straight, to Ryan’s eye’s, the blue entrancing him as usual.

“Are you sure? Your ready?” Ryan asked slowly and clearly. Jeremy jerked his head in a nod, enchanted by the way the blood shone on Ryan’s bare chest. Both men were stripped down to just shorts, both splattered and dusted in spray. Jeremy eyed Ryan’s collar bone, wanting to lick the line clean. Ryan tapped the underside of his chin, bringing eyes back to his face.

“Steady boy. Steady. Now, eventually I’ll let you use your own way but for today, did you want to go for the strangle?” he asked and Jeremy widened his eyes, pulse sounding in his ears as excitement flooded through him.

“Your majesty? I’d love to!” he enthused then quietened down as he grew insecure.

“But, I’ve never done that before sire.” He said and looked down at his hands. Always he killed at a distance. Always a bullet. He’d never even knifed someone to death. Ryan understood, dropping his own hands to catch Jeremy’s, their calluses rubbing together as the gent pulled Jeremy’s knuckles to his lips for a kiss.

“it’s ok Lil’J. I’m going to be here. Right by your side. The jiminy cricket on your shoulder.” Jeremy looked at Ryan, mood broken slightly by his confusion at the reference. Ryan rolled his eyes giving a little chuckle.

“Movie reference, we’ll watch it later.” They wouldn’t.

Ryan started to pull Jeremy forward, walking backwards as he guided Jeremy up their victim’s body.

Male, Female or Other, they were called Edgar. Always Edgar.

“Edgar, your young prince here is going to stop the pain.” Ryan said low and smooth, Jeremy settling with Edgar between his legs. All his weight was on his own knee’s, not wanting to put pressure on that fragile ribcage. Edgar moved their lips, tears leaking from the corner of their eyes but no sound came out. Ryan moved onto the bed, laying down on his side, where he could gently pull the hair from Edgar’s face, some strands being pulled from a layer of dried rust coloured flakes. Edgar's eye’s looked too Ryan, breathing hitching as they tried to work towards a panic.

“Shh. It’s ok. It’s over Edgar. Over.” Ryan soothed, patting their head tenderly, careful not to cause anymore pain. He nodded up at Jeremy, getting the lads attention as well as drawing Edgar’s to him.

“Prince? Do you know the hold?” Jeremy nodded and hesitantly put his hands on the delicate neck. He had been taught how to strangle someone out but had never put his hands on skin to actually use the knowledge.

Power thrummed as electricity jumped between his hands and that neck. As he firmed his grip, Ryan correcting with small adjustments, he felt Edgar's pulse thrum like a mocking birds heart. When they swallowed, he felt the Adams apple shift and gasped at the feeling. There was nothing but the gentle pants of Edgar and Ryan’s instructions and comfort.

Jeremy waited for Ryan to give him the ok.

“Edgar? Edgar listen to me. Look at Jeremy. Look at your prince.” Jeremy swallowed himself, his stomach feeling funny and light when those bright shining eyes met his. They glowing, overflowing with the pain and passion the two serial killers had poured into them. So full of feeling. Here at the end of life, the threshold of hope and pain, that’s when they shone brightest.

The light was brightest before it set.

His fingers twitched and he had to take a deep steadying breath to keep his hands from clenching. Ryan grinned knowingly but for once, Jeremy’s attention was pure on Edgar. Edgar had become the focus of Lil’J world.

“Edgar, do you want to stop hurting?” Ryan asked and a pitiful moan worked its way up and out of Edgar. Jeremy shuddered, his body both softening and hardening in different places as he felt the noise through his palms.

“Ask him. Ask him to make it stop.” Ryan started then looked up in delight as Jeremy leant forward, the lads voice as sweet and tender as his own.

“Edgar, It’s just you and me. Me and you buddy. Do you want me to make it stop? I can you know. Just us now Edgar. Just us boys. Tell me.” Jeremy’s voice cracked a little but become steady once more, “tell me you want me. Tell me you need me to do this. Tell me Edgar. Say it. Beg for it. Just you and me. I’ll make it end.”

Ryan swelled with pride and desire when Edgar choked out a single word.

“Please.” They squeaked out. it was all the permission Jeremy needed.

Ryan bit his lip, shifting slightly so he could watch as Jeremy immediately tightened his grip. Edgar gasped in a half breath before their airway was cut off by the steady press of thumbs. The shine was blinding, from both Jeremy and Edgar. Ryan knew his own eyes would be overflowing with light as he watched Edgar’s increase.

“Here it comes Jeremy.” He murmured as Edgar's light flashed brighter then the two other men. The body shook and convulsed, broken arms automatically trying to lift and fend off the threat. But there was nothing to be done. After that flash of light, Edgar's eyes rapidly were dimming. Jeremy leant in close, breathing hard, nose almost touching the victims. Ryan’s face was almost as close, quickly darting between the two, not wanting to miss the light going out or Jeremy’s reaction to it. Then it was over, the body going limp, light blinking out.

Jeremy had his hands locked tight around the throat, eyes widening as the ultimate rush hit him. Ryan laughed as Jeremy suddenly threw his head back, crying out, his hands coming off the neck like they had burnt. He looked at his hands, chest heaving, little groans as if he had 0ohm        run a race. Ryan continued to laugh as Jeremy put a hand beside Edgar's head and leant forward again, searching for the light that had disappeared. He saw nothing now and he sat back, his weight on a chest that gave a little beneath him. It didn’t matter, the life already gone.

“Ryan?” Jeremy’s voice was alarmed and full of energy unable to even address his King properly. He said the gents name louder then he meant too, his own voice too big for his body. He reached a hand out for Ryan as he fell backwards.

“Ryan! What’s happening!” he slurred, his body not obeying his orders. It was filled up, fit to burst with a golden haze that blinded him. It was the most wonderful feeling he could imagine but it was overwhelming his senses.

He blindly reached out as he fell from the bed, slumping on the floor, unable to get the world to steady. He tried to grab the ground, feeling as if he was lifting up, going to float away. He wanted to be panicked but there was no room for it.

He had killed.

Finally he was complete. He was fulfilled. This was the feeling that was missing. This sense of complete righteousness. As Edgar had flashed bright then burnt out, Jeremy felt as if he had absorbed that passion into himself. He needed to move, to run, to jump, to fuck, to scream, to do something with all this energy he had stolen. Had taken.

He was going to combust.

Then Ryan’s hands where on his face, pulling him into that solid chest. He buried his face in Ryan’s neck, only now aware he had been talking and crying nonsense. Ryan’s firm hands stroked his back, his hair, Ryan’s lips on his cheeks, his nose, his forehead.

“Good boy, good, good boy.” Ryan was crooning, rocking them back and forth. Jeremy clung hard to Ryan, using him to stay grounded in this world, his voice an anchor.

“Your alright little J. It’ll wear down in a moment, just breath Jeremy, breathe deep, that’s it.” Ryan coached. Jeremy felt what he meant as he adjusted to the light and soon, as he concentrated on his breathing, he found he could see around it. He was still full, still complete but he could also begin to think again. As he came back into himself, he found that he was pressed into Ryan in an unseemly way, both of them kneeling, his hands most likely going to leave a bruising imprint on Ryan’s back.

He tasted blood and saw he had bitten Ryan’s shoulder, then he met Ryan’s look scared for his punishment. Ryan was just grinning wildly at him, his eyes bright but not overwhelmingly so, his own lips red with blood, Jeremy’s shoulder aching with a matching bite. Then they were kissing each other, teeth knocking together and hands desperately roaming.

The scene shattered at a hesitant knock on the door and Gavin’s and Michael peeping around the door edge.

“Hey everything alright? We heard Lil’J screaming.” Gavin asked, and the two lads felt danger for their lives as their crewmates rounded on them.

“GET THE FUCK OUT!!” they roared together and just like that the lads were gone. Ryan pulled Jeremy roughly to his chest, hand in his hair possessively and a deep growl in his chest. Jeremy stayed still for the king, just closing his eyes and enjoying the feeling of light playing just under his skin, savouring the power that came from taking someone’s life. He knew he was in danger here, but he didn’t give a dam. Ryan could fuck him or kill him, it didn’t matter.

What mattered was the glow that warmed him from deep inside.

 

Alex was furious at the lads, having them both sit on the couch as he ranted.  Geoff stood back, eyes hooded and arms crossed. They would get no sympathy from him.

“the fuck do you think you were doing?” Alex bellowed, not expecting or wanting an answer as he paced before them.

“You know you’re not allowed down there! Fuck! We’re only here to help Jeremy through his first fucking time, not serve yourselves up on a fucking platter!” Michael dared to speak up, lifting his head.

“Come on Al, We heard Jeremy screaming. What the fuck were we meant to do? And they’d never hurt us.” He tried to reason and Alex was suddenly in his face, eyes hard.

“Come and get me or Geoff. It’s why we’re Fucking here Michael to stop you idiots from doing something dangerous and getting yourselves killed! As for them hurting you, remember what Ryan said about your need?” Alex paused as Michael recalled when the gents had found out about his dirty secret. Ryan’s words coming back to him.

_I can’t help out. He shines to bright. I’d break him. I wouldn’t mean to but it would happen._

Gavin looked confused between Alex and Michael. He had used Michael himself, the whole crew had with the exception of Ryan and he never knew why.

“Yeah,” Alex said softly as Michael looked down again, the bigger man moving away still speaking, “I think Little J is going to be the same way sooner or later.” Gavin opened his mouth but shut it again when Alex turned his glare on Gavin.

“We all got needs,” he said harshly each of them thinking over their own quirks that made them unfit to be normal human beings, “Jeremy and Ryan happen to have the same one. We’ll help them, just like they help us. But we DO NOT go down into the dungeon when they have a toy! Understand?” He fixed them both with a classic Alex stare that had them nodding they’re heads. Geoff sighed and came forward, Alex giving room for their boss and leader.

“Gav, Michael. I know you meant well. I know you were worried about Jeremy. But he and Ryan need their own space where they can be free without endangering any of us. Now a work torture, that’s fine. Ryan knows his limits. But here, this is Ryan’s private den. We respect his rules. If he says not to go down there for any reason, then I don’t give a shit if the buildings on fire. We don’t go down there. It’s for their safety as much as ours.” Gavin sniffled and Geoff decided to let up. If they hadn’t gotten the message by now they never would. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He nodded at the TV and Alex turned it on.

“Alright, let’s play something huh? I think they’ll be another hour or so.”

They started up the game station and started to play but Michael couldn’t shake the image of his killer crewman from his mind. The room stank something awful, of urine and fear and stale blood. Both Jeremy and Ryan had blood on them in various states, some dry and dark, some wet and shining. Jeremy had seemed an animal, clawing at Ryan. He didn’t know if they were kissing or killing each other with bites. It had been like watching two wolves trying to get at each other’s throats.

It had been the single most disturbing thing he had ever seen.

And the hottest.

Michael felt himself harden as he imagined being between those two. Being the bone they fought over. They would show him no mercy, he knew and he started to worry about his sanity, for the first time in a long time when he realised that they would probably kill him and he wanted it.

They had moved on to Mario party when the door to the dungeon opened. Ryan was almost, normal, only tinges of madness at the corner of his eyes. The blood had dried everywhere and they saw he had claw marks over his back and chest, bites on his shoulders. He nodded at them when he saw everyone looking, his hand firmly clasped in Jeremy’s, pulling the lad up beside him.

 Jeremy was worse, his face swollen and bruised, his lips large and red with a bite splitting the skin. More bites down his shoulders, more bruising on his chest and the tops of his hips where they peeked out from the top of his shorts. Jeremy walked unsteadily, following wherever Ryan pulled him, eye’s wide but unseeing, a disturbing grin on his face.

Alex leapt up but Geoff put up a hand to his second and called lazily to Ryan.

“Did you fuck Jeremy?” he called and Ryan frowned at him, pulling Jeremy into his side possessively. Geoff narrowed his eyes and Ryan reigned back the madness still so fresh with this latest kill to dip his chin submissively.

“No. I didn’t. He got a little overzealous and I had to put him back in his place.” He grinned and put a hand to his mouth, making a show of excluding Jeremy who only lolled blankly against his side, completely worn out.

“I think he wants me too though.” He fake whispered and got a stern look from Geoff.

“Wait for him to ask.” He ordered and Ryan looked a bit hurt, dropping his hand from his mouth.

“Geoff, I’d never take advantage of a death drunk.” He said seriously, then caught his eye on the two Lads. Gavin shrunk under his gaze but Michael bit his lip, eyes tracing the strength highlighted in blood over Ryan’s muscles.

“You two-” Ryan started to growl but Geoff cut him off.

“Leave it. We got the message through.” He assured Ryan who nodded and looked down to Jeremy, face softening.

“We’re going to clean up. I’ll settle him, think you could cook something soft for us Alex?” he asked and alex nodded, getting up with a groan. Ryan started to tug Jeremy along towards the bedrooms, the master having its own bathroom.

“Half hour, forty-five and we’ll be out. Quiet voice’s, slow movements.” He instructed them as he walked Jeremy down the hall. Geoff watched them go with a serious expression while Gavin nudged Michaels leg.

“Oi boi. What’s up?” he asked and Michael turned his eyes to Gavin, wide and blown out, voice trembling with need.

“Gavin, I need you.” He said and Gavin responded by grabbing Michaels wrist hard in his grasp so the bones rubbed together painfully.

“Anytime mate.” Gavin said with a smile and they both stood up, Geoff giving a nod of understanding as Gavin shrugged an apology and dragged Michael into a bedroom, slamming the door behind them, the sound of a body being tossed onto the floor. As an afterthought Geoff got up and knocked on the door, saying through the wood.

“Gag the bitch. Don’t want his screaming setting them off. Twenty minutes gav!” he heard a muffled agreement from the British man and walked into the kitchen to help Alex cook for their little fucked up family.

 

After his first kill, Jeremy had come out of the shower seemingly normal but like his drunken self. His words slurred and he had a hard time focusing on anything but Ryan’s voice. They had kept the volume down, teasing him gentle as the youngest crewmember ate with them. He smiled around at everyone, joining in the conversation as best he could in his drunk state.

Ryan’s first warning to stick close was when Gavin had spun suddenly on his stool and jumped off making to leave the kitchen. Jeremy’s strong fingers had closed around Gavin’s upper arm and yanked him, yelping into the counter. Jeremy’s fierce eyes were ablaze with power, making Gavin shrink back.

“Did you have permission to leave?” Jeremy asked, voice dripping with menace. Ryan stepped up, both hands untangling Jeremy’s fingers as he spoke.

“No Jeremy. Gavin’s not an Edgar. Let him go.” He said and Jeremy blinked, as Gavin shimmed back, rubbing his arm where the circle of Jeremy’s hand still was reddening. Ryan had put a hand on Jeremy’s face, mouth askew in contemplation as Jeremy blinked a few times and shook his head to clear it.

“Right. Right. Sorry, gav. My bad.” He said a little sheepishly and gave Gavin a small wave. With his breathing returning to normal Gavin pasted on a smile.

“Don’t worry about it. Call us even for me trying to get you to kill yourself huh?” he joked weakly but they all chuckled. Ryan caught Geoff’s warning look hidden behind a scotch glass and he nodded his head.

He’d keep an eye on Jeremy just until the rush settles.

His second warning came when they were travelling back to the penthouse. The other gents were kindly taking care of the remains so that Ryan could take his apprentice back to a familiar setting. Jeremy was pressed to the glass, watching the people as they drove by. Ryan didn’t think too much of it, the familiar and comforting weight of his mask back on his face. They stopped at a MacDonald’s near home, somewhere they were familiar with the Vagabond mask. The drive through was out of order, but Jeremy seemed calm and normal so Ryan took him inside with him.

He was contemplating the menu, the manager smiling with forced cheerfulness, the FAKEAH able to skip the line. He ordered two large family meals then turned his head to ask Jeremy if he thought they should get ice-cream. Jeremy was gone.

Ryan snarled to himself, angry that his own buzz had blinded the man’s normal senses so his apprentice could sneak off. He directed the manager to cook his food then stalked off to find Jeremy. There was very few places he could take someone and sure enough, after checking both bathrooms, he found Jeremy by the dumpster. Ryan had to admire Jeremy’s imagination, a hand pining his victim, covering his mouth as Jeremy used the victims own pen to gouge lines in their chest, shirt ripped open.

Ryan strode over purposely, tearing Jeremy away, the man stumbling drunkenly from his victim. The worker had no time to even breath a free breath before Ryan had taken Jeremy’s place. He brought his face close, the mask filling the unfortunate mans vision.

“You tell anyone about this, we will come back. Understand?” A frantic nod then Ryan was dragging Jeremy inside to pick up the food then too the car, unwilling to let him go. Jeremy sat quite in the car until he couldn’t bare the silence any longer.

“I’m sorry. It’s just so much...” He trailed off, staring at his hands, swearing he could almost see them glow, light oozing from his pores as he sat there filled to the brim. Ryan sighed, telling himself Jeremy’s lack of control was inexperience.

“It’s fine little J. You just got to get a hold of yourself that’s all.” He said soothingly but Jeremy didn’t hear him over his own dark self, whispering to him. Ryan thought the nod was directed at him however, the serial killer riding his own high and not fully concentrating on Jeremy’s face.

Still, he took this incident seriously, opting to stay close and keeping Jeremy at the share house for awhile.

Then came the third sign that Ryan needed to do something about Jeremy.

He was home the next day when he heard Michael scream half his safe word before it cut off. He was up and out of his chair in an instant, slamming open the door to Michaels room. He knew Jeremy had snuck off too fuck Michael, the sniper apart of their deal to keep Michael safe from strangers by fulfilling his kink.

What he didn’t bank on was Jeremy being so caught up from his first kill that he would lose control with a beloved crew member.

Jeremy had Michael bent over the bed, ass in the air and head on the mattress. Jeremy’s eyes were wide and his face feral as one hand pressed Michaels face hard into the bed, not letting the smaller man breathe at all. Blood was lined down Michaels back, Jeremy’s other hand the obvious cause, raking down that soft skin.

Ryan took three steps into the room, curling an elbow around Jeremy’s throat and tearing him from Michael who immediately threw himself to the side, heaving in deep breaths. Jeremy snarled and swung at Ryan who ducked then delivered a heavy hit to Jeremy’s gut, driving up too wind the small but strong man. As Jeremy gasped for breath, Ryan slammed him into a wall, pressing his arm against Jeremy’s throat until hands desperately grasped his own.

Jeremy’s face went red as he tried to breath, Michael dimly swearing behind them but Ryan’s eyes focused on Jeremy’s. He waited for the telltale flash then moved back, Jeremy falling to his knee’s gasping and heaving, naked at his feet. Ryan left him there and turned to Michael who shimmed up the bed, pulling his sheets up around him to cover his nakedness.

Ryan pushed thoughts of his Edgar in the same position out of mind and raised two hands to show he was unarmed.

“You ok? I heard your safe word but I didn’t hear you guys stop so I came in.” He explained and Michaels face grew angry.

“Your fucking sidekick tried to fucking kill me! No I am not fucking ok asshole!” he spat and Ryan felt a hand wrap around his leg, Jeremy trying to pull himself up. He kicked out and Jeremy fell back again with a grunt.

“I’m sorry Michael. I’ll talk to him. I think it’s safe to say that Jeremy won’t be playing with you again like this.” He wondered at the flash of disappointment that crossed the gunman’s face before the anger returned. Michael reached behind his pillows and pulled his handgun out.

“Dam fucking right he won’t be! Get the fuck out! and take him with you!” he bellowed gesturing with the gun and Ryan obeyed, picking Jeremy up, not bothering to gather clothes, just dragging Jeremy out by his hair and upper arm. He went straight from Michaels bedroom to his own, kicking the door open and throwing Jeremy onto his bed. He slammed the door but it was broken from his kick so he propped it closed with a chair. He turned back to see Jeremy was coming back to himself, tears welling and hands running through hair in distress.

Ryan brushed back his own hair and gave a huge sigh, letting his frustration out with the carbon dioxide. He pulled his phone and called Alex.

“Yeah, it happened. Playing with Michael got too real.”

“For fucks sake, why’d you let him go in there in the first place?”

“What do you want from me, I’m not their father Al. They consented, have done it before. I thought it might help mellow him out.”

“How’s Michael?”

“Really, no like Really, pissed. Come sort him out for me? I gotta do something about Lil’J.”

“Don’t kill him!”

Ryan scoffed disgusted that Alex had come to that conclusion.

“No I’m not going to kill him! You know me, I’m on a murder break for a few weeks unless Geoff orders otherwise.”

“yeah we all know how successful that can be.”

“Fuck you Alex. I won’t kill him ok? Just gonna do our thing in here and I don’t know if you guys wanna be listening in.”

“Fine, I’ll be there to pick up Michael soon.”

“yep sure thing. Thanks Alex you’re the best.”

“What happened to ‘Fuck you’?”

“Maybe later Al.” Ryan said suggestively and hung up. Jeremy was still naked and had his head in his hands, cross legged on the bed. Ryan snapped his fingers and Jeremy looked up eyes shining in a way that made Ryan’s breath catch. Ryan found that watching Jeremy kill, though not as fulfilling as killing himself, as all that life goes to the one who actually winking out the light, was still an amazingly satisfying experience. The emptiness inside him was almost to the brim but years of practise meant that Ryan wasn’t overwhelmed by it.

But he knew what it must be like for Jeremy. To be bursting with the thrill and the power. To hear it whisper to him to use it. The world awash with possibilities, the want to get that rush again, as soon as possible. Even if you were going to explode with it, the power made you not care. Golden haze was the ultimate drug and Jeremy had overdosed.

Ryan knew how to bring him down again.

Ryan grinned and pulled his shirt over his head, kicking his shoes off and shedding his pants. Once attired in his birthday suit, he leapt onto the bed, crawling over Jeremy, making the younger man lay down to avoid being steamrolled.

“Jeremy.” Ryan said softly and Jeremy gulped as the older gents weight settled over his body, their dips and curves caressing each other. Ryan felt hard against his thigh and even though Jeremy had lost his excitement as he realized what he had almost done, he knew he was firming up again.

“Jeremy, you were very bad.” Ryan said seriously and Jeremy whimpered when Ryan lowered his head to nibble at the younger mans throat. The bites he had given the lad were scabbed over and healing so he pressed soft kisses to them, murmuring sweetly.

“Such a bad boy Jeremy. You tried to kill Michael. That was so wrong.” He switched to the other shoulder and felt the body under his tremble.

“R-Ryan?”

“Why’d you do it Jeremy? Why?” Ryan looked into Jeremy’s face for his answer, the two killer’s eyes both blown out with desire. Timid shake of the head and Ryan gave a soft growl.

“Words.” He ordered and Jeremy tried to think of how to speak.

“Wanted.” He managed and Ryan pressed himself into his apprentice. He brought his teeth against Jeremy’s cheek, causing him to remember those same teeth sunk into his own body. He shivered and he felt himself pulse between his legs.

“You wanted to kill?” Ryan asked and Jeremy nodded.

“But you don’t need too?” Ryan swapped to the other side, hands starting to trace through Jeremy’s hair, the lines of his skin on his chest, trying to guide Jeremy into realising the difference between the emptiness needing a kill and the haze wanting one.

“N-no.” The lad managed to stutter and Ryan looked at him again. That predator see’s prey stare that melted Jeremy into butter. His mind screamed that he was in danger but Jeremy didn’t care. He was the sole focus of Ryan’s world.

“Greedy Jeremy. Aren’t you full? Aren’t you full of light?” Ryan’s words were taking their hypnotic effect, drawing Jeremy into where his other self lived. That other darker Jeremy was stronger now. Fed by a kill and it was with that killer strength that Jeremy dared to reach up and fist Ryan’s hair, drawing a grunt from the older man, tracing a finger over Ryan’s Adam’s apple.

“Full of light. It’s so warm. I’m so high.” He murmured, feeling that floating feeling again and Ryan grabbed his wrist, pulling it from his throat. He dipped his chin, blue eyes filling Jeremy’s sight.

“Did you want me to help you down? Is that what you need? Too much power, need some siphoned away?” Jeremy whimpered as he realised that was just what he needed. There was too much, the power he had found filling him to the point it was hurting him. Driving him mad, needing to use this new power. Ryan could fix that for him.

“I won’t do it unless you ask.” He told the younger male.

“Please. Ryan. Ryan I need you.” Jeremy begged and Ryan drew a shaky breath, controlling his own dark self at those words.

“No, Jeremy. I need you to breath and focus on me.” Ryan said, shoving down his own high to give Jeremy all the attention he needed. Jeremy obediently took a few breaths as Ryan held himself still so his apprentice could consider carefully. When he saw a bit of reason return to Jeremy’s eyes he spoke again.

“Now think carefully. I can help you but I give no guarantee’s and no safe words.” He warned, wanting to be clear.  He knew sex after a kill was a tightrope. A tug of war between the Dark self and the everyday self. He was confident he could keep Jeremy subdued but not so sure about himself. Chances were good so soon after a kill that he could stop before he seriously hurt his partner but there was always a chance.

“Yes Ryan. Please. Help me. It’s too-too much. It’s leaking out from my skin, I need you to take some light.” Jeremy tried to keep his voice steady but the light was choking him. It was the best kind of pleasurable pain to have this power welling inside but he felt out of control.

 He was out of control.

He wanted to use this power, this energy up. He gave a little needy whine, his nails catching on the scabs on Ryan’s back and he saw the gents eye’s snap.

Fuck it.

Ryan kissed Jeremy hard, forcing the lads mouth open with a tongue, his arm going under Jeremy’s to grab at the sheets, trying not to break his partner. He grinded his cock against Jeremy’s thigh and growled, snagging soft lip in his and biting down to get the taste of copper, reopening the split. Jeremy groaned and pressed up into him, his grip on Ryan’s hair tight enough to pull strands, fingers bruising as he clutched Ryan’s side.

Jeremy and Ryan felt the light only they two could see. It washed over, around and between them. Spurring them on. Ryan bit the corner of Jeremy’s neck where throat met shoulder. Jeremy cried out, arching into the hold. Ryan kicked Jeremy’s legs open, settling himself between them, thrusting forwards aimless, rutting against plaint flesh. Jeremy’s hands were everywhere, touching and pinching, nails leaving red trails in their path.

The lad was growling and panting, trying to hurt just as much as he was trying to get Ryan inside him. Ryan let go of Jeremy’s neck, blood down his chin and smacked the lad with an open hand as he sat up.

“Be still!” he commanded and Jeremy fought his control, throwing himself up, trying to claw Ryan back down onto the bed with him. Another open handed smack set the lads head spinning.

“Still!” Demanded Ryan and this time it sunk in a little better, Jeremy grabbing the mattress and forcing himself to still.

Ryan grunted approval and unmindful of Jeremy below him, leant towards his side draws, scooping out lube. Jeremy tried to touch him, wanting to trace some of the claw marks on the chest above him and Ryan growled, batting hands away. Jeremy changed tacks, sure hands getting a firm grip around the gents cock, stroking him with a firm hand. Jeremy grinned feral as he saw Ryan’s head tip back at the touch. Ryan groaned and let this go on for a few strokes before he came to his senses. He smacked Jeremy’s face again, back handed this time, the eye socket swelling.

“No. I’m in charge here. I am always in charge.” He snarled at Jeremy who had conflicting feelings at the words. Wanting to submit at the same time he wanted to fight back.

Ryan made sure to come down hard on Jeremy’s stomach, his weight momentarily driving the air from Jeremy’s lungs. Ryan wrapped a single strong hand around Jeremy’s throat, squeezing until the lads eyes bulged and hands grasped his forearm. He realised his grip and as Jeremy gasped in breath once again, spoke quietly.

“Stay still. I will give you what you want but if you don’t stop fighting me, I’ll go in dry. You like to be ready don’t you?” he sneered nastily and Jeremy nodded, under control once more.

“Please. I just want you now. My skin, it’s itching. I need you to take some light before I explode.” Jeremy whimpered and his hands pawed at his own sides, wanting to touch Ryan but afraid too. Ryan slid down Jeremy’s body, and Jeremy arched and screamed out when Ryan took his cock into his mouth. The gent shoved a commanding hand on Jeremy’s knee, demanding he spread his legs.

Jeremy obeyed, mewling and giving little thrust of his hips into Ryan’s warm mouth.

As he worked Jeremy, sucking and bobbing expertly, Ryan coated his fingers and circled Jeremy’s tight hole before sliding a finger in. Jeremy arched and grabbed the bed to centre himself. Using a hand and mouth, Ryan pleasured his young crewman as he begged and muttered Ryan’s name. His other hand slowly worked two then three fingers in, making sure Jeremy was ready for his girth.

When he deemed Jeremy prepared, Ryan came off his cock with a wet plop, sliding back up and kissing Jeremy domineeringly, making him taste his own pre-cum. The sand haired torturer brought his hips close to Jeremy’s searching for his entrance with the head of his cock.

“Ready Jeremy? Oh, you better be ready cause I’m about to destroy you.” Ryan growled, voice thick as he found what he was looking for. He had enough sense to want to prepare Lil’J, not wanting to hurt the crewman he loved to the point of no return, but he also knew that once he was inside, nothing will stop him.

Jeremy’s legs came up to wrap around him and they both grunted as Ryan pushed into the shorter male below him. His cock throbbed, filling up Jeremy who writhed below him, hands back to grabbing his body. Ryan didn’t give a shit about those needy fingers bruising him, just enjoying the tight warmth he bottom out into. He grabbed Jeremy’s hair, pulling the man’s head back so he could see the bites along Jeremy’s throat and shoulders. His eyes narrowed as his dark self begun to take over.

His eyes shuttered over as he begun to move, tightness milking around him as he went straight to a hard merciless pace. Jeremy was crying out, Ryan feeling his hands on his sides, fingers dug in deep. Ryan felt power alike and unlike the golden haze, having his apprentice dance underneath him, knowing the man he was fucking had just taken a life and was now his.

“Yes, oh this is what you wanted isn’t it?” Ryan muttered, the younger mans eyes closed and head lolling as he was slammed into again and again, working them both into a frenzy. Ryan had grabbed Jeremy’s shoulders, his own fingers pressed in hard, a scab of a bite cracking open under his thumb.

“Wanted me to fuck you. Been wanting me for so long. I’m inside you now. Huh? Happy now? Answer me Lil’J” he ordered and Jeremy opened his mouth only for a lewd moan to escape, broken by the rhythm of flesh slapping against flesh. Ryan grinned savagely to see Jeremy so undone, he got up onto his knees trying not to break his rhythm, his hands grabbing Jeremy’s hips, fingers digging in furrows to Jeremy’s skin.

“I love looking at you like this. You remind me of Edgar, all spread out on my bed. Tell me what you want Lil’J.” He speared in and out hard and fast, knowing their release would come soon but not able to slow down. He wanted Jeremy to cry his name, beg for his load. Ryan wanted Jeremy to tremble and cry for him.

And he was getting his wish.

“Ryan! Ryan please! Oh fuck me Ryan! I need this!” Jeremy couldn’t string together a proper sentence and his hand went to his cock which was bouncing against his belly, hard and neglected. Ryan snarled however, grabbing his wrist and pulling it up, making his shoulders come off the bed, the sound travelling deep into the pit of Jeremy’s stomach where the heat was growing with every thrust as it hit his prostate.

“No! Bad Jeremy! You are going to come from me fucking you! Do you hear me!?” Jeremy tried to voice an agreement but Ryan shoved even harder, setting a punishing pace that had Jeremy’s legs turning to jelly. Ryan used the strength in his arms to pull Jeremy up, pooled in his lap as he bounced up into him. Jeremy’s own strong arms grasped around Ryan, head tucked into Ryan’s shoulder, using his skin to muffle his cries. Ryan knew Jeremy was close and bit at his ear, whispering.

“If you don’t cum before I do, I’m going to kill you.” Ryan  brought his mouth close to Jeremy’s face, his hand at his throat again. The threat was real and that more than anything had Jeremy panting a building cry before he saw stars, body shuddering as he came. Pulse after pulse hit his stomach and Ryan’s, painting between them sticky.

Ryan threw his head back, grinding up into Jeremy as the lad convulsed around him, then he was shoving him back down onto the bed. “that’s my boy.” Ryan groaned and pressed his head against Jeremy’s neck as his own release came near, savagely fucking him into the bed, uncaring now of how rough he was being with Jeremy’s body, just chasing his own end.

“I’m going to fill you. Fill you up with me. Your mine. Fucking mine!” Ryan gave another croaked groan then grunted, hips jerking as he came inside of Jeremy. The Lad felt the splatter hit inside of him, filling him with a different kind of heat with each stroke. Ryan grunted and thrust a few times in and out of Jeremy, milking himself into the willing body beneath his. Then the he sheathed himself as far as he could and let himself slump onto Jeremy’s heaving chest, both of them breathing hard.

Jeremy’s head swirled and his muscles ached in a way that felt amazing, feeling as if every part of him had been disconnected. Ryan was lazily licking his throat, an almost purr rumbling in the older gents chest. Jeremy just let himself go, limbs going weak, not able to use any of his strength. Best of all was the powerful golden glow that had been pressing under his skin, pushing him to feral heights had dimmed. He still felt it inside but it was manageable.

In control.

Submitting too Ryan had given him back control of his dark self, the voice fading back into the newly awaken corner he had found. He just breathed in, letting the oxygen fill him then slowly let it out, throat aching and knowing he would have Ryan’s fingers imprinted around his neck for some time. Ryan was warm against him and inside him. With a groan he moved his numb arms to wrap around the gent that lay on him. Ryan rumbled in affection and kissed the curve of Jeremy’s jaw.

“Better?” he murmured and Jeremy jerked his chin in assent.

“better.” He breathed in relief. He felt Ryan smile into his skin then groaned, weakly trying to hold Ryan to him as the more experienced killer started to get up. Ryan put a hand on Jeremy’s arm warningly and Jeremy subsided with a needy whimper.

“I’m just going to clean us up a little. God Jeremy, get a hold of yourself.” Ryan said scathingly and Jeremy tried to do just that. He shut his eyes as Ryan cleaned himself off, wiping his shoulders and scratches to get the blood off then his stomach and groin for the more traditional mess. He then tended to Jeremy, cleaning the fresh bite’s and open scabs, making the lad flinch not at the cleaning of his aches but when the cloth wiped at his over-sensitive bits. Ryan curled whatever he had used to clean them under Jeremy’s rump then flipped onto the bed beside him, throwing an arm around him and drawing him close. Ryan nuzzled into his neck again, going back to licking Jeremy’s pulse point, feeling as if he was tasting Jeremy’s light and life from the spot.

“Ryan?” Jeremy said sometime later, his voice scratchy and Ryan hummed acknowledgement.

“What’s happening to me?” He asked, his voice small. Ryan leant up so Jeremy could see his face.

“Your awakening Jeremy, that’s all.” He reassured but Jeremy looked away then back to Ryan’s face then down again, those chocolate eyes unable to keep contact with dominant blue.

“But what about this?” he asked and pressed a hand to Ryan’s chest, spreading his fingers over Ryan’s heart. Ryan knew what he meant and chuckled.

“My first time was an accident.” Ryan whispered and Jeremy found he could look into Ryan’s face who was grinning kindly at him, the madness retreated.

“I didn’t mean to kill him. I was just so frustrated.” Ryan’s eyes seemed to look past and through Jeremy as he remembered then he shook himself out of it. He traced Jeremy’s face with his fingers, the lad still watching him curiously.

“It felt so good. You know what I mean. I had to do it again. So I did. I killed and I killed and I killed. No break between them, no build up. The police were after me and I could hardly move, I was so full.” Jeremy breathing was starting to build as he listened, imagining what it would have been like for Ryan, so close to bursting with the golden glow and being chased. Ryan seemed to know what Jeremy was thinking and he smiled down at his lad.

“I had no one to help me. No one who knew that I was getting out of control. Then I met Alex. He had the light and I wanted it.”

“You tried to kill Alex?”

“I tried. I would have succeeded too but I was too fresh then. I wasn’t thinking straight. All I cared about was the kill. Just like another killer we know.” He flicked Jeremy’s nose who chuckled and flushed.

“It’s about power Jeremy. We have it. We have the power to see life. The power to take it and when we do, it comes into us. Until you build your reserves it can be overwhelming. When that happens we need to give the power up, let some of it go or it’ll drive us mad.” Ryan’s eyes sparkled with mirth as he gave a savage smirk and Jeremy felt an answering tooth filled smile split his own face.

“Well, mad-der.” Ryan admitted and Jeremy chuckled in agreement.

“In time you’ll learn how to ease the burn. How to cleanse yourself. There’s nicer ways then the one I went through.” Jeremy chuckled and cleared his throat, the muscles there now making it known how sore they were after multiple bruising hold.

“What did you go through?” he managed to ask and Ryan chuckled darkly.

“Well I didn’t have anyone to force me to submit like you just did,” another lick over his throat and a tug in his hair, “But I did have Geoff. And I still have him now.”

Jeremy turned his head to look at Ryan questionably, surprised by the flare of jealousy that ignited in his stomach. Ryan laughed and shook his head.

“No, no. Not like this. I just said that. Geoff used another way too” he searched for the right word with a hum before settling on, “Domesticate me.” Jeremy shifted, putting a leg over Ryan’s, an arm around him and head tucked under his arm. He shut his eyes, his afterglow from sex mingling pleasantly with the golden haze from his kill, relaxing him completely.

“Tell me?” he asked softly and Ryan put a hand around Jeremy’s shoulders bringing him in tight and the other stroked his face in a surprising tender gesture.

“I was a little younger then you are now.” Ryan began his mind going back to where it first started.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So i hope that was cool, like i said first time i've written smut.  
> Now jeremy has a kill under his belt and anxious for more, Ryan will be telling his story don't you guys worry so more creeper Ryan ahead when he was a freshfaced serial killer! tell me what you thought, sudgestions (put nicely) are welcome, hope i didn't creep anyone out too much lol Kudos apreicated if you feel like it and see you in the next chapter!


	9. Long ago...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryans journey to the FAKEAH

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the below is disjointed for two reasons. We are covering a time span of at least nine to ten months in which time didn't have much meaning and not match varied in the spaces between paragraphs. With every space just imagine whatever was last said countined in that vein for awahile.  
> second, Ryan doesn't remember it well and i had to skip to alternate POV just to countine the story along because a broken mind can't convey what i needed it too.  
> So murder, torture, captivity, drugging, police death and more ahead, as usual read by your own choice, i tried to warn you  
> Enjoy!

The point of the docket spike winked at him suggestively. Ryan stared at it as he waited in line to order his coffee. He admired the long thin metal spike, imagination wandering as the cashier spiked another docket and the line shuffled forward. He drifted off into a daydream where the cashiers hand slipped, that perfectly sharp point sliding through palm as easily as paper. Ryan’s hand tingled, almost feeling the shape of the base in his own palm. Driving it in, feeling bone give before it sinks fully through.

He shook his head, blinking hard and looking up as the line moved once more, now second in line. Something was wrong with him. Surely, it was just the stress of his life at the moment. He had been living out of his car for the past three weeks since his girlfriend had kicked him out in favour for an empty-headed body builder. Smart isn’t sexy anymore apparently.

Thus the coffee. He had a problem and he needed the Coffee buzz too solve it. He got to the counter and ordered, giving his name and standing to the side as he payed. His eyes were drawn to the steam rising from the coffee machine. He tipped his head in contemplation.

Fire. Maybe that was it.

His name was called and he grabbed his drink, blowing hard before taking a sip, heading back to his car. The coffee did help; Ryan had been up all night driving around considering his options. It’s why he hadn’t made the best choice come morning.  As he drove now, all he could think was there really was something wrong with him.

Normal people get depressed when their girlfriends replace them. Normal people go cry when they are fired from their jobs for being unreliable due to homelessness. Normal people don’t go back to their exgirlfriends place for stuff they had left, see the new boyfriend bench pressing and drop a dumbbell on their head.

Ryan hadn’t meant to do it. He hadn’t gone there for conflict. He had just wanted his collection of Shakespeare back. Stupid muscle bound Edgar let him in. Sneered at him and ruffled his hair as if he was a child. Ryan had tried to bite back the anger, he really did. He managed to scrounge up his collection, which had been scattered around. Soon all he was missing was ‘A midsummer dream’ and he couldn’t find it so he had gritted his teeth and gone to ask Edgar.

“geez Brainac, did you check the toilet?” Edgar had laughed and Ryan felt his fists clench.

“No. There would be no reason it to be there. Unless you read in that time?” he bit out and Edgar had laughed at him again, that irritating bray grinding through Ryan’s brain.

“Fuck no. We ran outta toilet paper.”

That had been it. Edgar was too busy chuckling through his reps to notice Ryan grab an eight kilo dumbbell from the side wall. The first and last thing he knew about it was seeing it suspended above his head before Ryan simply let it go.

Ryan had felt power and satisfaction like never before when he saw that huge idiot convulse once and go limp. Blood oozed from Edgar’s forehead and Ryan had watched it run down the side of Edgar’s face, fascinated. Then the idiot had moaned, twitched and Ryan knew he had a problem. Cleaning the dumbbell and the bench had been easy. Getting the huge bull of a man into his trunk unseen had been hard.

But he had managed it.

Edgar blinked blearily at him, the drugs Ryan had force fed his unconscious body making him sluggish when Ryan finally got him out of the trunk. He dumped him onto the desert ground, the hole already dug. He had opted for a desert burial in the end since he was leaving this state through it anyway. Edgar tried to speak through the gag, his arms and legs tied with rope.

Ryan ignored the mumbles just planning on dragging the man into the hole and letting the weight of the dirt settle the rest. Maybe if he had been thinking clearer, he would have considered what a man, fearing for his life, would do to defend that life. As Edgar saw where Ryan was taking him, a deep hole in the desert sand, he started to struggle.

“No! Stop!” Ryan called as the bigger man started to flail, his bound legs kicking Ryan in the face making him drop the feet he had been pulling and grab his nose. Blood spurted between his fingers and Edgar’s angry eyes flashed at him, his gag knocked askew.

“You sick fucking, fuck! Let me go you fucking nerd before I snap these and fucking throw you in the hole!” Ryan’s panic at Edgar’s resistance melted away into a rage. Edgar had started pulling with his teeth at the knots around his arms so Ryan threw himself onto of him, rage making him lash out with his fists. Edgar fended him off, fighting him with his doubled up fists, throwing the smaller man off with his strength.

Desperation boiled with fury and Ryan almost blacked out from the force of it. From instinct came the command to his hands to pull out his pocket knife. From the fight or flight reflex came the instruction to throw himself onto the body builder again. From his own empty space came the voice that had him driving the knife into the side of Edgar’s neck repeatedly, the blood spraying all over the both of them and the sand they wrestled over. Edgar stilled, choking, hands rapidly weakening as they tried to grab at Ryan’s arms. Ryan gave one last stab, breathing hard from the exertion and his eye’s caught on Edgar's.

He had asked his dad once about the glow he saw in certain peoples eye’s. His father had called him a nutter and beaten him black and blue. All his life, Ryan had noticed that some people’s eyes just had that soft glow to them. Edgar had the glowing eyes and they drew Ryan’s gaze now as something he had never experienced worked its way inside him.

The light was growing brighter.

It was expanding and bathing his face in a warmth. Just it built slowly, blood still pouring over knuckles where his knife was lodged in Edgar's throat. He was fascinated as he had never been before, that glow warming the parts of him that had always been numb. Then to his disappointment it rapidly faded and blinked out as Edgar gave a final gurgle and died.

A beat passed where Ryan was completely numb.

Then ecstasy.

Power thrummed into him from the hand that still held the knife, the glorious burn of it making Ryan cry out, falling down to lay beside Edgar as his whole body was filled with a rush of golden energy. Ryan arched his back involuntarily, his fingers grabbing handfuls of sand as every inch of his body filled to the brim with the best high he could imagine.

His senses were overwhelmed, the stars burning like the sun overhead, the smell of copper and sweat coursing over him mixed in with the sweet smell of coolly baked sand. The dirt rubbed against his skin which was a tingling all over. He was alive. Well and truly Alive.

And nothing would ever be wrong with him again.

The golden power stayed with him and it wasn’t even 24 hours until he had killed again. A girl this time, one who had opened her door to his knock. He pressed her inside, hand against her mouth and sunk his knife into her stomach as he kicked the door shut behind him. He watched intently as he moved knife from stomach to throat, slitting it wide.

That second rush had him blacked out for an unknowable amount of time. When he came too, his skin felt afire and he could almost see light coming from his pores. He hit the walls, unable to find balance, lurching into a shower. He washed, fully clothed, the cool water soothing the fever heat coursing in his veins.

He found clothes roughly his size and so when the partner came home, was waiting for him. It was a messy kill that had him rolling about afterwards, laughing uncontrollably, bursting with exuberance. He left them there in that house, taking what he needed and burning the rest down.

A timeless state followed.

He found himself in a costume store one day, no memory how he got there but something caught his eye. He dropped the bat he had beaten the clerk to death with on top of the soft empty eyed body and staggered towards the mask display. In amongst the extravagant werewolves, the colourful doll faces and the American animals, dull silver glinted. He grabbed it, the blood on his fingers beading against the finish.

It fit his face like a second skin.

 

-The man only known as Vagabond struck again today, robbing a convenience store on the Great ocean Highway, killing the clerk in cold blood. Several police officers were killed in the following car chase as well as pedestrians and road users. Visual was lost within the Rockford hills area. Residents of Los Santos are advised to maintain an alert stance now that Vagabond may be residing in the city.-

 

Ryan strolled through the streets, letting people brush up against him, searching for the next one. He met people’s eyes obsessively, looking for that beautiful glow. He ached all over, he was exhausted and the bullet that had ripped past his hip burnt. Only the golden haze over his eyes propelled him forward, only the lights buoyancy holding him upright. Sleep had been abandoned as useless, food only a fuel to bring strength to his arm.

Nothing mattered but the kill.

It was night and she was screaming no matter how many times he slammed her face into the wall. He growled this one only giving the dullest of shine, even as her death flared bright, it was muted to his senses. He let her fall before her soul had even fully fled, hitting the wall with a fist until the blood on his knuckles mingled with the blood from his victim.

Where was his rush? Where was the reward? Did she not burn bright enough? Was he too full? Couldn’t he fit anymore?  Was that the problem?

People screamed and ran from him when he got out of the car. He looked to his hands, clean and fine. His shirt had nothing on it, freshly stolen from a victims draw. He touched his face, cool plastic meeting his fingers. Oh.

The police chased him constantly, always a step just behind him. He couldn’t think straight, he couldn’t run properly. Every person he touched keeled over dead before him, not giving him the chance to see the light. Their empty, empty eyes screaming up at him from the ground. Mocking him. Shunning him.

So heavy.

So hot.

Had to flee.

Had to kill.

Where was he?

Whistling stabbed through his brain from over sensitive ears and he snarled. Yes, the goateed guy from the bar. That’s right. His green eyes were spotlights; the brightest Ryan had seen in a very long time. He had followed him here. Where ever here was.

The knife was an extension of his hand, his feet practised at the stalk.

Beat, beat went a heart but whose Ryan couldn’t begin to guess.

The guy stopped and incredibly, bent to tie a shoe. Ryan came up behind, ready to turn them and slit their throat in one move. A tread behind him and he turned to face the threat.

A sting in the side of his neck, the knife tumbles from his loose grip as he becomes numb all over.

“Goodnight buddy.” A voice says smiling.

 

“Next time your bait.” Alex said as paced across the empty space from the cell. Geoff chuckled, twirling the end of his moustache with a hand, the other in a pocket. He was leant up against the wall, watching Alex stress.

“Come on, he didn’t even touch you.” Geoff said and Alex speared him with the look that only his best friend seemed immune too. Proven right now by the fact his friends smile didn’t even twitch.

“You’re worried about nothing Alex.” He pointed out and Alex grunted in frustration.

“Oh yes, we just got a serial killing psycho locked in our basement. Nothing to worry about.” Geoff chuckled at that.

“Relax. He’s in the cell. He’s not coming out. We’ll just do a quick interview and if he’s no good, kill him.” Alex stopped his pacing to glare at Geoff.

“Seriously how many times are we going to do this? There’s only so many times I can stand washing down the cell.”

“Ok, one? I’m the boss remember? I am not scrubbing floors. Two, no one told you to clean up in there, I’m perfectly ok with them sitting in cold blood. Finally, number three, he’s our best candidate! His kill count alone is twice the last guy!” Alex came forward and put his hands on Geoff’s shoulders trying to make his overzealous friend see reason. Geoff wanted to run this town and he had crazy idea’s how to do it. This was one of them.

“Because he’s a nut job Geoff. That’s why. He’s not discreet and his not refined. I told you before we picked him up and I’ll tell you again. We need someone of intellect. Someone who knows how to coax information from someone. Someone fresh on the scene, to build their rep with ours.” Geoff shrugged the hands of his shoulder and put a hand on Alex’s cheek, smiling fondly.

“You are a nutter too remember? We need his kind of crazy. If we tame the Vagabond, well... that shoots us straight past the kiddies table and into the big leagues. The fact is people are already scared of him is great! Raw material Al. Like uncut diamond.”

Their conversation came to a halt as they heard a deep mad chuckle from the cage. They both looked to see Vagabond had awoken, untied himself and sat upon the bunk, both hands on the side of the mattress, that silver mask shining at them.

“Crazy am I? Perhaps. Not as Crazy as the Men who think to confine me into an EDGAR HOLE!!” he had started out deep and calm but had lunched forward, grabbing the bars as he hit them hard with his body, roaring at them. A moment of charged silence then Geoff dropped his hand from Alex’s face with a puzzled expression.

“The fucks an Edgar hole?” he asked the captured killer.

 

Vagabond raged in his cell for two days. Alex begged Geoff to just put the mad dog down but he was refused time and time again. Geoff spent most of that time in a chair he had dragged down to sit comfortably in, listening to the madness spew forth. Food was denied and water came from the tap next to the toilet.

Between the standard, “I’ll kill you, I’ll kill you all.” And the classic, “it’s pouring out, It’s pouring out from my skin!” Geoff learnt a few things from the insanity.

This was once a man of intellect. He quoted Shakespeare and equations he couldn’t follow. He sometimes dissolved into talking to an invisible customer, some complicated fix or set up for computers. Once Geoff had to lean forward to catch what Vagabond was muttering as he rubbed his back against the bars over and over again.

“I can feel it in my motor neurons.” A mad little chuckle, “From the spinal cord to my big toe. It’s all a glow!” A gleeful amused chortle, “Cells in a cell!”

Geoff couldn’t make head or tails of that.

What he did hear a lot of was about an Edgar who apparently died multitudes of times. He put together that this vagabond seemed to believe people had some sort of light, visible in their eyes. That he wanted it more then he wanted food or air. And that currently, Vagabond believed he was going to die a wonderful death from combustion.

It gave Geoff an Idea.

 

Ryan lay on his back staring at the ceiling. Everything hurt. His stomach had eaten itself and his mouth was paper. The mask stank of sweat and blood, his arms were weighted down with his bones. He was weak, weak, weak. What’s more, he was helpless.

He had thrown himself around, trying to rip his way out to no avail. An image of a muscled idiot doing the same thing came to mind but he didn’t have the energy to get angry. At least for the first time since he had killed, the light at receded enough into himself that he was no longer in danger of exploding.

He could think once more.

He remembered he was a man and that laying here in clothes he had worn for heavens knew how long was distasteful to him. He felt so sticky and grimy and oddly all he wanted was a shower. And perhaps a sandwich.

A face moved into his vision, which was kind of it since he didn’t really want to move his head. Kind eyes crinkled at him in a friendly face. They had a light and he dimly felt a stirring of the greedy monster in his chest. He smacked it down, telling it to use its brain. They couldn’t lift a finger right now let alone disable and kill this man.

“So buddy, you still with us?” Ryan considered the question carefully. He was alive, he was fairly certain about that. But his condition would be alarming had he the energy to dredge up said alarm. As it was he wanted to give them a sign that, yes he was indeed still with the living but he couldn’t remember how to nod.

“I’ll take that croak as a yes.”

He’d made a sound? Well that worked just as well as anything else. He wanted to complain when they manhandled him into the bunk and out of his clothes. He couldn’t see himself but he knew it was bad from the concerned noises they chittered at each other. The mask took skin with it, Ryan wondering if it had fused to his body. Apparently not as he felt fresh but still air on his cheeks.

“Wow, you would have been a handsome son of a bitch once upon a time.”

“Well, if you’ll shove Geoff I’ll see if I can save you little pet.”

A pinch in the crook of his elbow and Ryan was drifting in a different kind of haze. Drugs, supplied his mind and he thanked it for the information. In his disjointed mind, he heard the man named Geoff speak again.

“We’re gonna get you up again Vagabond. Then I’m gonna feed you ok? Don’t you worry about a thing alright? I gonna give you everything you need.”

He needed to kill.

 

Alex sighed when he saw Geoff heading down again.

“Seriously? Why are you keeping him alive? He’s not going to cooperate with us. Mans not even grateful for us saving his skeletal ass from starvation.” Geoff paused at the top of the stairs going down with a plate of roast chicken and a bottle of Coke. He flashed that devil may care grin at Alex.

“We’re bonding Al. I thought you of all people would understand that.” He said and Alex rolled his eyes, turning back to his paper while Geoff fed his pet. When Geoff came back up, covered in coke and nursing a black eye, he was the bigger man and said nothing even as he chuckled.

“Apparently, he’s a diet coke guy.” Geoff said stiffly before walking to the bathroom.

Alex let go the moment the door swung shut, tears springing to his eyes.

 

“Ryan.”

Geoff stopped his blabbering at the now familiar dulcet tone of his pet.

“What was that?” he asked, unsure if he had heard correctly.

“My name is Ryan.”

Geoff had been sitting on his chair backwards so he could cross his arms over the back and rest his head on it. He looked up properly now, gazing at the sandy haired prisoner. It had been three weeks since they had caught him and he still fascinated Geoff. The flush of health to his cheeks made Geoff proud of the strides his pet had been making.

“Ryan.” He said, rolling the name around in his mouth, tasting it, getting used to it.

“Nice to meet you Ryan.” He grinned and the caged killer walked forward, grasping the bars and pressing his forehead to one.

“Geoff.” He said softly and the tattooed man thrilled to hear his pet say his name for the first time. Normally, Ryan, and he loved he had a proper name for him now, would say the bare minimum. After the two days of endless ranting, he had seemed to have run out of words. They brought him back to health slowly and the stronger he became, the less mad he had seemed.

Geoff had been outlining his plan to Ryan for the hostile takeover of a meth lab nearby. A stepping stone on the way to greatness. He hadn’t expected any input or reaction, more talking about it for something to say. Then from nowhere, Ryan had opened up.

“Geoff, I’m hungry.” He said now, his voice thick with need. Geoff sat up and patted the chair back once for the noise.

“Sure thing bud, what you feeling like? We got leftovers from last night or noodles...” Ryan shook his head, his eyes blue in the dark shadow of his face.

“that’s not what I meant.” He said slowly and deliberately. “You have something I need. I’m willing now to hear you out.”

Geoff got up, pushing the chair away from him, his normally open face turned hard and serious.

“Ok then. Let’s talk.” He said then paused to send a message to Alex before he looked back at Ryan.

“I am going to run this city. I need a crew. People I can trust. Talented people with skills I can use. I want you to be one of those people.” Ryan smiled at him, bringing his face back slightly so the light could show off his handsome features, filled out again with Geoff’s care.

“And if I said, ‘sure I’m in’ right now?”

“Nice try, you’re staying in there a bit longer.” Ryan nodded, smile fading but not dropping as he stepped back from the bars and sat on his bed.

“Of course I would. Well continue.”

“Long story short, you got a representation as a demonic motherfucker. I want that fear and respect behind me. What’s more, you got a killer instinct and a talent in avoiding cops. You’re a god dam shadow who pops up, murders a shit tone of people and disappears again.” Footsteps down the stairs did nothing to stop Geoff talking.

“If I was reading the room right when you got here, you did all that stuff, while high! I can only imagine how’d you go with a clear mind and a bit of training.”

Alex stood at Geoff's right hand, slightly behind him. Ryan gazed at them both, giving them his full respectful attention.

“So I came up with the perfect win-win scenario for us both.” Ryan cocked an eyebrow at him which Geoff took as a good sign.

“You’ll be the crews resident, persuader. You get all the victims you would ever want, and I get the best god dam cop killer there is.”

Ryan ducked his head, thinking once Geoff fell silent. Alex gave a sidelong look at his Boss, that said this was a bad idea. It was ignored.

“Ok, Here’s my cards out on the table.” Ryan finally spoke after a few minutes, “I wasn’t high on any drugs when you found me. It was the light.” He said it as if that should mean something.

“Yeah you may have mentioned that a few times.” Geoff said and Ryan’s face closed over. Geoff looked to Alex who sighed and nodded. Geoff became visibly happier, almost bouncing when he turned back to Ryan.

“We got you a little something.” He said in a singsong voice. Alex pounded back up the stairs muttering to himself about doing all the work, coming back dragging something that had Ryan up and against the bars in moments.

“So there’s a catch here.” Geoff said, taking the collar of the bound mans shirt, holding him up for Ryan’s inspection. Ryan couldn’t stop staring at what Geoff was offering. Then a harsh voice cut threw his excitement.

“Ryan!” Geoff barked and the killer tore his eyes away to look at Geoff.

“Ryan,” he said again his tone milder, “This is terry. Terry has a time and place locked in that pretty head of his. I need it. I need to know when the pickup is and where it will be.” He shook the guy once making him whimper.

“Think you can get it for me?” he asked and Ryan nodded quickly, just wanting Geoff to throw him this bone. Geoff held up a finger, bringing Ryan’s eyes to his again.

“If it looks like you’re going to kill him. I’ll shoot him first. Understand?”

“If you shoot him then I can’t get the light and I need it Geoff!” he thumped against the bars, face turning feral, “I need it!”

“Get the info I need Ryan. And I’ll supply all the light you need. Starting right here once it’s been emptied of everything it knows.” He threw the man forward into the bars to crumple at Ryan’s feet, on the wrong side for Ryan to do anything but pat him. He looked up at Geoff to see both he and Alex had pulled their guns.

“Why don’t you back up for a second, and we’ll get your new bunk mate inside.”

Ryan backed up quickly, mind already turning over the fastest way to make this guy talk so Geoff will let him feed.

 

Alex sat upstairs, bucket between his legs, face still green. Geoff sat stunned beside him, staring at nothing. Hands clasped between his knee’s. Alex panted over the bucket, eyes watering as he looked up to Geoff. He wanted to speak but just as he tried to form words to describe what he had seen, his mind supplied the images and he was heaving again.

A heavy hand patted his spine, Geoff still spaced out as he comforted his friend.

“I think he’s hired.” Geoff said woodenly and Alex gagged once more.

 

Ryan spent a grand total of three and a half months in his that cell. In that time, he interrogated twelve people and was allowed to finish four. He had learnt that the trick wasn’t to rush, it was to take his sweet time. He was as well trained as any doctor in how the human body was put together. Knew the easiest way to pull it apart.

Through the safety of the bars, he got to know and even become friends with Alex and Geoff. Trust was built slowly on both sides until Ryan was docile enough to manually give himself the sedative that put him asleep so the other men could wash him and the cell. They supplied him books, then a portable DVD player. Soon, the TV was constantly set up down here so they could watch or play games together.

Then came the glorious day when Geoff came down, Alex wary beside him to smile at Ryan.

“We are sick of cleaning up after your lazy ass. Come upstairs and make your own god dam lunch.” The door opened and Ryan took two steps through, pausing just outside the doorway of what had become his world. He looked between the two men who had trapped him and smiled.

“So do I have a bed up there or am I on the couch?”

Ryan was smart enough not to bite the hand that fed him.

After all, Geoff had given him back his sanity, or at least a semblance of it.

 

There was only one time Ryan bucked against Geoff's authority. They were trying to lay low after a successful heist that had brought major heat down on them. Geoff and Alex had their heads together almost constantly, debating who they should enlist next, which skill was more desperately needed. It had been nine weeks since his last kill and so Geoff shouldn’t have been so surprised to come home one night from a long meeting to find Ryan had a friend over.

“Ryan! Not in the house man. We’ve been through this. I told you to lay low.” Geoff said angrily, storming over to gesture at the woman bleed out on living room floor. Ryan looked up, his eyes glinting dangerously his new face paint he had been experimenting with smudged all over. The knife he had used still in hand.

Geoff didn’t care, waving a hand at him.

“Clean your fucking mess up. This is bullshit Ryan. I’m taking your cut for this and you can bet your not getting a kill order for quite awhile buddy.” He said harshly. Ryan raised up slowly, wavering from side to side.

“Who the fuck are you. To tell me when I can kill?” He said slowly, madness in every word. Geoff sensed thing were different and gone was the easy going hooligan, making way for the steel spined crew boss. His face was hard and his stance firm as he locked eyes with the killer.

“Geoff Fucking Ramsey motherfucker, you better not forget where your bread is buttered.” His voice rung with pride and power, grating against the killers sense of invincibility. Ryan snarled and took a step towards him threateningly.

“Ryan, you take another god dam step like that and I will put you the fuck down.”

He took a step.

Alex had been running late behind Geoff so it was fifteen minutes after Geoff had come home, did he come through the door, pulling up short. The living room was destroyed. The shelving on the walls was knocked down, items scattered everywhere, an imprint of a body busted into the wall. The TV was smashed and toppled, the living room table broken into splinters and the couch upended. There was a fucking body rag dolled over the TV unit for crying out loud and he recognised spray patterns of both impact hits and sweeping knife cuts.

Geoff was atop Ryan, his knees pressing down on his friends arms, restrain them, his hand on Ryan’s throat and the barrel of a gun in his mouth. They were both panting hard, one trying to suck air in around the cold metal prising his mouth open. Ryan had a broken nose that was still oozing blood and a piece of glass embedded in the top of his cheek bone, one eye already swollen and black, his blue eye barely visible as he gazed up at Geoff.

Geoff for once looked more deranged then Ryan. Blood leaked down from his hairline over half his face, his lip was split and swollen, he had already spat the offending tooth out. his shirt was hanging, slices in the fabric displaying shallow lines across his chest to match the defensive wounds on his arms.

“Now you listen to me.” Geoff was saying low and intense, “I own you motherfucker. You are my fucking dog and you do not bite me.” Ryan kept his eyes on Geoff’s which blazed even brighter then the fresh glow inside him, the power in the voice pressing down upon the serial killer, freeing his mind as he had so many months ago in that cage.

“You do what I say when I say it and you don’t” he pressed down on the gun making Ryan gag on the deadly weapon for a moment, “Fucking disobey me again.”

“Do. You. Under. Stand?”

Ryan nodded and Geoff removed the gun but nothing else. Ryan worked his jaw testing the looseness of it before he addressed his master.

“Think I look bad? You should see the other guy.” He tested the water with the insolent joke. Geoff pressed the gun to Ryan's chest under his shoulder for the through and through and pulled the trigger.

Alex helped Geoff up and his boss staggered a bit as his legs got kicked by the cursing vagabond, thrashing as he held his shoulder. Alex patted his back, both stepping away from Ryan who was spitting mad but incapacitated by the unexpected shot. Geoff looked to Alex who gave him that tell all stare. Geoff shrugged and gestured with the gun still in his hand.

“What? You’ve been begging me to shoot him since day one.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Alex, i noticed he gets ignored alot and shunted to the side. Always there, watching over them, taking care of them even if they don't notice him. Poor poor Alex.  
> (Laughs malicously)  
> Comments and kudos make my world go round please give me feed back and sudgestions for what you'd like to see next! thanks for your time and i hope i entertained you at least alittle. Untill the next chapter!


	10. NOT CANNON

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan's alternative first kill
> 
> Extremely short first take GEOFF V RYAN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is not cannon in my personal take on FAKEAH.  
> This was my first run at the Geoff Ryan fight i wrote VERY eraly in the morning lol  
> It didn't make the cut because i didn't think anything i could write as a fight scene could convey the epicness, my skill as a writer just wasn't up too it.  
> Also since this was written before anything else of Ryans flashback chapter, i had no idea at the time what it was about or why he had snapped. I just had this image of geoff putting him down then shooting him to make the message stick.  
> extremely short draft of it.  
> then just below it was my first run through of how ryan became a killer. I was trying to guide it with an idea of getting him into an alley and losing his temper but once he killed i hit a blank wall with no idea where to go. Then i reread it and realised it just didn't sit well with me, Ryan taking drugs especially. So i stole elements from it and rewrote it, just letting Ryan tell me what he was doing there at the coffeeshop instead of me trying to force problems upon him and we got the chapter i ended up going with  
> Ok longest note i ever wrote so shutting up now so you can enjoy my process and these drafts  
> last thing just gonna say OBVIOUSLY THESE ARE NOT CANNON!

His ex girlfriend was right about that. He frowned as he remembered their break up just two months before hand. He didn’t mean to hurt her, but he was getting too rough in bed. The moment she had seen the bruises on her skin, she had gone off. Ryan tried to explain that he was just passionate for her, that it was the heat of the moment, but she wouldn’t have it.

She spouted some domestic violence rhetoric about ‘not only once’ and walked out of the door and his life. Ryan wondered if she had the truth of it. Instead of being sad she had gone, instead he felt angry. Angry she had left him, angry that he couldn’t force her to stay. Just angry. All the time.

He sighed and stepped up to the counter, trying to wait patiently as the cashier slipped away to help prepare some coffees to get rid of the backup of orders. Maybe he should see someone, Ryan thought to himself. Surely, it wasn’t normal the way he felt. Maybe he was a domestic abuse perpetrator waiting to happen. All he knew was something was missing in his life, he was angry about it and when he saw the outline of his hand written in blue across his girlfriends skin, he felt a stirring in that empty space he never noticed before.

“Dude? You gonna order?” Ryan looked up startled at the cashier who had returned. He blinked a few times and unclenched the fists he had automatically made without thinking about it. He nodded and gave his usual to the bored man who dutifully wrote it down and took his money. Ryan stepped to the side to wait and the sound of paper sliding down the wicked spike caught his attention once more.

He got his coffee and left, wandering aimlessly. He had been fired from his tech support job just a few days ago. Lost his temper at some fucking asshole who ate into his time, ignoring his advice, telling him how he should do his job, how stupid and useless he was only for the jerk to turn around and say ‘oh, I tried turning it off then on, it’s working now.’

Ryan’s phone was still embedded in the wall, his boss still having flashbacks too having a computer monitor fly at his face. In exchange for no severance and no collecting his holidays or sick day pay, there would be no lawsuit. Besides what’s the point of suing a man who was rapidly bleeding out money and would be broke within a month.

Ryan grip tightened on his cup and hot coffee spilt over his fingers making him curse and drop the drink. He shook his hand out, rage building as he thought over his shitty fucking life that had culminated in this moment of hot coffee he shouldn’t really be wasting money on now gone without his enjoyment of it. Plus, he now had burns on his hands.

Fucking great...

The sound of laughter reached him and he looked around for the source, spotting the alleyway across the street from his sidewalk, a hoodied young man pointing at him, bent over. He bared his teeth, furious someone had seen his embarrassment and his brain went blank just as it had in the office. Before he could think, he was striding across lanes of traffic, cars slamming breaks and honking, his eyes locked on the hoodie who had straightened and looked serious as he approached.

“Hey man, sorry about your coffee. Maybe you can suck it out of your shirt.” The guy teased as Ryan approached. From some instinct, despite the throb of anger in his head, Ryan’s face became friendly and he gave a chuckle that sounded almost normal.

“Yeah, it fucking stinks. Look, bad day, you got anything that could make it better?” he asked and had guessed correctly as the man’s eyes took on a more open look. He gestured for Ryan to come closer, so they were inside the alleyway, hidden from sight.

“My man, I got just the thing for your bad day.” Hoodie said, glancing about before he reached into his pocket and pulled out a few different bags. Ryan looked down at the drugs then up into the dealers face as the he explained what he had for Ryan.

“For our beginners, this little bundle comes straight from my cousin Miko’s hothouse. Smooth and reliable.” The dealer was saying, nudging the bag of plant extract. Ryan pointed down the line at the small bag filled with little shiny hard balls.

“And that?” he asked, curious not about the bag but about what he saw when the dealer spoke about his products. Sure enough, Ryan saw a flash in the guy eyes, illuminating them from within as the dealer smiled and started in passionately on the sale. The light had eased the rage in Ryan as he let the guy go on. Every little flash soothing him as he listened.

“So what you buying man?” the dealer rapped up and to Ryan’s disappointment, he could now only see the colour of the guys eyes, no light to be seen. Ryan pulled his wallet and got the best he could afford with the cash he had in hand. He pocketed the pills, peering into the dealers face as he did so, the guy starting to get uncomfortable.

“Hey man, this is over. Go take one of those chill pills huh? Fuck off now.” Anger surged again and Ryan’s hand tightened on the pill packet, eyes narrowing. He forced himself back and away, muttering to himself about getting in control of his emotions. He couldn’t keep these mood swings to stop and he had no idea why they were happening or how to stop them.

He ended up sitting on a park bench, fingers tracing the pills he had bought so impulsively. He had never done drugs before, always avoided them. However, maybe in his hand lay the answer to what he was feeling. The anger that was rearing up as it willed, the emptiness eating away at his life, the numbness and the knowledge he was missing some vital part of himself.

Take a chill pill the guy had said.

Ryan did just that, swallowing them dry. He shook his head, now looking at the empty packet, wondering if he should have taken them all or not. Probably not, but he was beyond caring now. He walked over to the public fountain, taking a drink to help wash the pills down fully. As he straightened, he wondered if the pills were acting quickly or if it was a mental effect that had his arms starting to feel light.

Confused and disorientated, he started walking again, letting the drugs wash through his system. His mind was blanking out, random thoughts dancing through his head. Surely, his girlfriend hadn’t meant it when she said he hurt her. She was so pretty, marked with his hands. She had cried out for him hadn’t she? Ryan bumped into someone and he tried to mouth an apology with a thick tongue but it got stuck as he looked into an angry face.

“Watch your fucking step asshole!” the guy yelled at him, eye’s blindingly bright then fading as he walked away from Ryan. Ryan shook his head trying to clear it but he lost his balance, hitting a wall, trying to hold himself steady. He could feel his insides; feel them bunched together inside him. He rubbed a hand over his stomach, trying to ground himself in his own touch.

He stumbled forward, unaware of what time it was or where he was heading. Just aware that there was an empty space inside him. It felt so wrong. What was missing? Stupid boss deserved to have that monitor chucked at him. Ryan wishes it had hit. That it had smashed in that stupid face. He wondered if you could kill a man with a monitor.

What? Kill a man? Why kill? Oh, what’s that sound? Ryan found his way into a dim hall, following a call that drew him forward. A voice raised in song, voice throbbing with feeling. Feeling? Was that what was missing? No he felt. He felt anger. He felt rage. He felt helpless.

That brought him up short, falling into a chair in the seedy bar he had found himself in. A woman was standing in the corner, men leering as she sung, her arms gesturing them in, hypnotizing them. Ryan felt her pull, felt her call.

Helpless? Was he helpless? Helpless to stop his parents splitting. Helpless to stop his girlfriend leaving. Helpless to keep a job, obey society, conform, conform, conform. So frustrated and angry. He needed a job to pay his bills so he could have a house where he could shower and get ready to go to work to earn money to pay his bills... On and one the cycle went. Had to get a girlfriend, had to marry her to have children to take his place when he grew too old to work on the wheel of society. Ryan felt a pain in his hand and looked at his palm where he had dug his nails in deep enough, two had broke skin.

The blood glinted in the light.

He looked up to find the source, caught up again by the woman’s entrancing spell. There it was that light once more. He stood up; gliding forwards until her song stuttered and hard hands grabbed him. He was forced back then thrown out, yelling helplessly about the singers light. That he needed to see.

Tossed in the trash and scoffed at for being drunk. He got to his feet, rage at being disrupted from his investigation coursing through him. Someone touched his shoulder and he lashed out, a body flying from him into the brick wall. They slumped and his breath caught. It was a man, one with a kind face. When they looked up and smiled at him, their eyes flashed at Ryan.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you. I just wanted to know if you were ok. They were pretty rough throwing you out.” Ryan instinctively held out a hand, helping the guy up. Once he was upright, Ryan searched the man’s face for that light but it was gone. He frowned and the guy looked at him in friendly confusion.

“Are you alright?” he asked again and Ryan murmured softly, “It’s gone. The lights gone.”

“The light is never gone brother.” Said the man and pulled from his person a piece of paper with clouds and light printed upon it. He tried to hand it too Ryan but found himself back against the wall, Ryan’s hands on either of his shoulders, his eyes searching desperately for another flash of light he had caught when the man under his hands had spoken.

“It was there again and now it’s gone! What’s happening, how are you doing that?” Ryan demanded and now the man was trembling, trying to get his hands between them to push Ryan away.

“Sir, I’m not doing anything. I just wanted to tell you about the light of our lord. But you seem very upset so maybe read the pamphlet and come around when you’re feeling less tense?” fear was in his voice and Ryan shook him, making his head crack against the wall once more.

What he was going to say was forgotten as when the skull cracked against the wall, the man’s eyes flashed again. Ryan grabbed the head, the man now opening his mouth to scream. He smashed him against the wall, again and again, harder and harder, light becoming brighter and brighter, no longer fleeting as the body fought for its survival. Hands and legs kicked at him, but Ryan felt only the strength and power pulse through him, the light shrieking at him to take it.

He paused as the light almost blinded him, the guy going limp in his grip, the wall behind him wet and dark. Ryan used his thumbs to open the lids that were shutting, letting this new light wash over his face. Then it started to fade but this time, instead of causing anger it caused a heady feeling to wash into him. As if he was absorbing this mans life force into his own.

Dead empty eyes looked into his own. There was a beat and then Ryan was stumbling back, falling away from the body that crumpled at his feet. For the first time in a long time, Ryan felt a happiness fill him like a golden haze of light.

 

Ryan came at him, snarling and deranged but Geoff was ready. Ryan tried to tackle his waist but Geoff's legs held firm and he carried the momentum through, throwing the mad man into the wall causing the shelving to topple wood, books and decorations down on his head. Ryan got up, steaming, throwing himself again at the calmer sane man.

Once again they met in a grapple, teeth snapping for Geoff's throat but he angled his head and smashed the thick part of his skull into Ryan’s jaw, then brought a knee up into his gut. A double fist to the back of his head and Ryan was on his knees. Geoff hit Ryan’s face with his own knee then when he was down on his back, fell atop him, beating at his head to keep him down.

With his legs on Ryan’s arms, the murderer could do nothing to defend his head, the blows setting his mind to blank. He came too, dreary and out of focus only a few moments after the barrage had stopped. The cool touch of metal in his mouth bringing him around.

“Don’t think for a second I won’t put you down.” Geoff said evenly, now Ryan was looking up at him.

“You’re a useful dog but you remember the hand that feeds you. Never try to bite me again.”

Ryan nodded slowly, the message sinking in.

Geoff pulled the gun from his mouth, letting it hang to the side.

“I am your master. You might be the great scary vagabond that has everyone quake in their boots but you and everyone else needs to remember this.” He tapped his own chest with the pistol, leaning forward painfully on Ryan’s arms.

“I own you.” He said. Ryan still had defence in his eyes as he nodded so Geoff put the gun to his shoulder and Fired.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So hope you did enjoy, but not more then the way i actually went lol seeing as this wasn't the final cut! my process is, i have an idea of what i want to tell and i let the characters go where they will, following them, trying to guide them where it needs to go. Sometimes though i try too hard and it breaks character so despite likeing the above i felt it was too out of character.  
> Thank you to my regular commenters LibbyBell, Ganglylimbs and OokamiTenshi and thank you too my new commentors and Kudosers for taking this journey with me! there is more coming up, just seeing if Tervor and Matt come first or Alex  
> Stay tuned!


	11. The dream team

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trevor and matt have some time off for recreation and catch up with a friend  
> FakeAH meeting ahead  
> This chapter inspired by a sudgestion by LibbyBell :) thanks for the inspiration!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know everyone wants to see Alex and i tried to swing it that way but it just wouldn't flow. So here we got Trevor and Matt and i PROMISE this leads directly to Alex's chapter. Just this one needed to be first as you'll see when you read it  
> So this is a milder chapter, refrances to disturbing things throughout but no murder torture rape etc here, this is some interpersonal plot, we'll get back to the dark creep next chapter ;)  
> Enjoy

Trevor and matt worked together both at work and outside of it. They were thrilled to be a part of the FAKEAH crew, their skills being exercised to the best of their abilities. They worked under a boss who handled the business part of Geoff Ramsey’s empire with a fiery fist. The phoenix was not to be crossed.

But Lindsay also became a friend and when the two of them, with Jeremy, rose through the ranks, they became closer to her. Jeremy made it right to the top, but he didn’t forget his friends, Trevor and matt coming to know the main team more, Lindsay of course was already firmly in that circle, the right hand of Geoff just as Alex was his left.

They learnt that the main guys were just as fucked up as themselves and it made it easier to request equipment for their joint little side hobby. Vagabond gave them perspective marks, that mask hard to behold and the eyes dead behind it. Trevor would get the list from him, always a bit unnerved by the presence of the resident torturer.

Gavin helped matt learn his security systems. How they worked, how to pull them apart, what to recognise and how to avoid them. They worked together in their off time, laughing and playing, Gavin proud in how quickly the pickpocket learnt. In return Matt showed Gavin how to pick locks so the brit could get into houses of his own marks easier.

Michael taught Trevor and Matt self defence. How to fight, just in case they were ever busted. People would be furious to discover the duo in their private areas. Some people lashed out in that anger. Geoff knew they went in armed but he approved of the muscleman’s plan, ordering Trevor and matt to lessons even when they were bruised and sore from the last time.

Alex gave them a more discreet but fast car. A little minivan that Trevor could set up his stuff in the back, plenty of room in the boot for Matts trophies. Lindsay approved a few days off for them and they knew it was time.

They had the house picked out. A nicer upper-class joint for a wealthy pair of brothers. Matt waited impatiently, fingers itching as they sat in the car. Trevor was calm, eyes on the house, waiting for them to sleep. The two had just kinda fell into a partnership after a few years of dancing around each other.

Matt was a kleptomaniac. Sure it might not be exciting compared to the rest of the fucked up desires the rest of the crew had but the need was strong. It didn’t matter how well off he was, how much stuff he had. He didn’t care to buy anything, had no need of earnt money. He just needed a job that would let him be who he was.

A dam good thief. He couldn’t resist a stupid mark, often when they were hanging about up town, matt would return to the car, pockets full of valuables and wallets he would dump in the gutter. It was the thrill of not getting caught. Of taking what didn’t belong to him.

Tonight was for Matt mostly. Trevor would just take the opportunity to set up his own little quirk as Matt robbed the brothers blind. He had his stuff prepared in a backpack, sitting on the back seat. The rest of the back seat area was full of wires and monitors. He wouldn’t set up his portable cinema until he was done inside.

Trevor liked to stalk. He people watched in the most extreme way. He fell in with matt, the thief getting them in and as he took anything that wasn’t nailed down, Trevor would wander quietly room to room, setting up his bugs and his camera’s. He’d also poke about their personal effect, maybe borrow a diary if he was lucky enough to find one.

Then he’d retreat with matt, set up his cinema and begin to watch. For weeks he’ll monitor them. Learning everything about and between the house occupants. He’d go on the journey of being robbed with them. Laugh with them. Cry with them. And when he started to get bored, begin to fuck with them.

Leave little notes in their windows. Maybe break in and take someone’s cherished item and put it in someone else’s room. Just watch them sleep, perhaps leave a gift on their pillow. Watch them go mad, realising someone was watching them but not knowing who or why. He never hurt them. He wasn’t that kind of man. But sometimes he might pass them down the line to Gavin, if his antics had driven them into a state of mind the British man would enjoy.

An hour after all the lights went out Matt smiled, his long hair hidden under a beanie, the man giving a long drawn out sigh of relief.

“It’s time.” He told Trevor who nodded. They were both wearing dark, casual clothes that covered most their skin. They got out, Trevor sliding his backpack on lovingly as matt carried his duffel, currently empty. They walked down the street from where they parked, coming up to the locked gate of their chosen house. They could have climbed the fence but they enjoyed it better this way. Trevor leant against the frame of the gate, pulling out his phone to look as if he was waiting on matt fumble with a key. Matt slid his tools off his belt, popping the lock in seconds, replacing the tools just as quick.

They walked into the yard like it was their own. In their scope out, they knew there was a security light but there was a tinkle of glass and they knew they were in the clear. Trevor turned and gave a hip wave to where Jeremy had sniped out the light. He knew his friend would send him a text later asking how it went but now he was waiting on matt.

Matt looked to Trevor, nodding to show he was ready. Trevor nodded back and matt opened the lock, swinging the door towards him so Trevor could rush by and disable the security system before it timed out and sent a call out. Matt closed the door behind him and looked at the pad rolling his eyes. Trevor gave a quiet chuckle and the two softly high-five before they spread out.

Matt started in the lounge room, empting the cabinets of anything he saw as valuable. He also took the Xbox one out of spite. As matt went around, taking what he wished, Trevor pulled his bag in front of him and started bugging the place. He looked around with an artistic eye, placing hidden camera’s where he thought the best shot would come from.

He finished quicker then matt downstairs, the blonde guy trying to decided what he wanted, only one duffel bag worth wearing on his spirit. Trevor padded up the stairs and winced as a stair squeaked. He paused and when matt pocked his head out, put up the fingers for which stair was noisy. With no one else stirring, he continued, testing his weight carefully.

He now stood in a hall and it was full of pictures. He frowned puzzled as he went down the line, snapshots of the brothers growing up and their lives getting older the more Trevor walked on. There was also a third person common in all the photo’s, most likely a sister from how she interacted with the guys in the photo’s. Trevor had his own ideas as she disappeared around the twenty year mark, the guys still aging into their late twenties.

He bugged the hall, put in its camera and moved on to the doors he had past. He went back to the beginning, starting with the first door on the left. This was a room, a man sleeping naked on his sheets inside. Trevor smiled, this was the thrilling part. Dangerous, but thrilling. Trevor moved silently around the room, hyper aware of the human asleep steps away. He put his bugs in and found one door lead to a walk in closet which he also bugged. He then had a quick perusal of the drawers and cabinets, getting an idea of this guys personality.

He looked up when the door opened but it was only matt. He spotted Trevor who shook his head. Matt frowned and left him be, coming back later when Trevor was done. Trevor took the guys phone and with sure fingers bugged that too before carefully replacing it. Then after promising himself he’d be back, left for the next room.

He repeated his ritual in the next occupied room, bugging the phone in there as well as the closet and the master bedroom bathroom. Matt had been through he could tell, the place sparse. He knew matt wouldn’t be able to resist more then he could carry, that there would be a pile of items left at the back door when Trevor dragged the thief away.

 The third bedroom shot straight to Trevor’s heart, knowing he was in for a great show. It was basically a shrine, obviously for the girl in the photos. He hurried over and smacked matts hands away from a jewellery box that was gathering dust. He pointed matt out and the thief glared at him indicating around at all the precious items. Trevor grew firm, his face hard and motioned matt out again. Matt gave a small groan and slouched out with Trevor boring a hole in the back of his head. Trevor shook his head and looked back to the dresser, growling to himself that the box was gone while he was having a silent argument with matt.

The rest of the room hadn’t been touched yet and Trevor delighted over his find. Bugging this room as well, he took pictures of how everything was arranged. He would defiantly be back to rearrange in here. He opened a drawer and almost cried in happiness. He hugged the notebook to his chest, silently thanking the ghost of this girl for her gift. It didn’t matter it was years out of date. This book contained personal memories of the siblings Trevor had chosen.

The last room was a spare bedroom converted into a gym. He put up the last of his little bugs and left, tiptoeing down the stairs. Matt was, predictably, sorting through a pile of stuff. Trevor hit the back of the thieves head and pointed up, miming opening a jewellery box. Matt grinned guilty with a shrug but didn’t produce the item.

Trevor sighed and offered his empty bag which matt took, eyes shining thankfully. It took another half hour for Matt to sort and resort the bags, wanting it all but unable to carry it. Finally Trevor grew impatient, snatching his bag up and throwing it over his shoulder. Matt hefted his duffel and look mournfully at the little pile of treasure he was going to have to leave.

To make matt happy, Trevor put the Xbox under his arm and gestured for matt to go first through the door. He did so and as they left, Trevor juggled the Xbox and the notebook so he could reset the security. The door shut softly behind them and they left through the still open gate.

“Holy shit that was great!” Matt said, huffing with his duffel bag but his face happy, “So much stuff! Seriously, why do people need all that junk?”

“Junk? You stole it!” mat laughed as Trevor watched him drop the bag behind the van.

“doesn’t mean I’m keeping it.” Matt pointed out happily and opened the boot, both of them drawing back in alarm then grinning as their hearts came back from their throats.

Lil’J slept with an arm over his eyes, curled around his rifle like it was a lover. Matt shook a boot and Jeremy sat up, pistol in hand, eyes focused if a little sleepy.

“Oh, sorry.” He said when he recognised them and put his weapon away, rubbing his eyes.

“What you doing? I thought you were heading home after taking the light.” Trevor said, handing matt his Xbox and the bag. Jeremy got out so Matt could put his trophies in the boot, smiling at Trevor.

“Yeah then I thought, ‘fuck it’. I haven’t hung out with you guys in awhile and I kinda miss helping you break in too places.” Trevor gave his broad shouldered friend a spontaneous hug that the sniper returned.

“We miss you too Lil’J” matt said, shutting the boot and getting his own hug. After that was done, the three started to get into the car, Jeremy in the middle of the back so he could stick his head in the front. He looked between matt and Trevor as they took turns describing their little robbery/setup. He smiled happily as his friends gushed, affection for them plain to see.

“Oh, this is her diary too.” Trevor was saying, lifting the notebook from his lap, having not let go of it since he found it. He paused in the story, glancing at Jeremy who was staring at him, a casual expression on his face but those dark eyes seemed to be burning.

“What? Do I have something on my face?” he asked, rubbing his chin self-consciously. Jeremy shook his head slowly then turned to matt, prompting the pickpocket to tell his side. After a few moments matt also trailed off, Jeremy now staring as intently at him as he had at Trevor.

“Jeremy? What is it?” he asked and Jeremy spoke, low and wondering, a voice neither of them had ever heard from their friend before.

“You guys... I’ve never noticed before, but you’re so passionate about this. You shine.” Trevor felt a chill run down his spine, one that was familiar but only Vagabond had caused before now. He tried to laugh it off, giving Jeremy’s shoulder a quick shove.

“You been drinking Jeremy?” he asked, keeping his tone light as the sniper broke contact with matt, the slimmer man slumping slightly as if he had been frozen in place. Jeremy sat back, running a hand over his hair.

“No I haven’t been drinking.” Jeremy said with an air of untruth between them. Trevor glanced at him in the rear-view mirror, matt shooting him worried looks.

“Something up? You can talk to us. You know you can.” He said, wondering what could have brought such heavy presence to his happy go lucky friend. Jeremy sighed and looked to his hands, clenching and unclenching his fists.

“I know. But tonight’s not the night. Tonight’s your guys night.” He looked back up to the front of the van, back to his normal self, the darkness that had been on his face passing.

“Sorry, tell me more. Matt, you said the guy had a nipple piercing and you took it? How the fuck did you manage that?”

Matt started in slowly but gained more confidence as Jeremy responded normally. Trevor however couldn’t shake the feeling something was off with their friend. Jeremy acted normal as they drove to Matt’s little storage shed, getting out and helping Matt so Trevor could set up his portable cinema. But as Trevor heard Matt and Jeremy chat, unloading the car, he detected a deeper tone to Jeremy. Like his voice had dropped down lower.

He was just finishing up installing the monitors into their places when he heard a shout and a thump from the shed. He leapt out the door, personal pistol in hand, approaching low and fast towards the rolled up door entrance to the shed. Another shout.

“Jeremy back off!” then Trevor saw Jeremy stumble back as if he had been shoved. Matt stepped into the light, fists clenched and face angry.

“What the hell man?” he shouted and Jeremy was putting his hands up, backing further away.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry alright!” he said as Trevor holstered his weapon and strode into the shed, a three way face off sans weapons.

“What’s going on?” he asked and matt gestured too Jeremy who ducked his head guiltily.

“Ask him! He’s the one getting grabby.” Trevor looked to Jeremy, confused and Jeremy shrugged putting his hands in his pockets.

“I said I’m sorry Matt. I just,” he shrugged helplessly and kicked a foot, “I just couldn’t resist when you’re so worked up. You’re so bright when you’re being a thief.” Both of his friends exchanged confused looks and Trevor took a step towards Jeremy.

“Dude, what is going on?”

“Nothing, nothing.” Jeremy said too quickly but he wasn’t fooling his old friends who were starting to close in on him.

“No not nothing Lil’J. You’ve never shown any sign of being into me as more as a friend for ages and yet you were all over me there.” Matt pointed back into a dark corner where his freshest trophies were stored. Trevor didn’t understand it, Jeremy ducked his head, then dodged by them both out of the shed. He looked up at the night sky taking a deep breath then looked back at his oldest friends.

“Trevor, Matt. I’m sorry I fucked up this night. I should have gone straight home. In fact I had orders too but I just wanted to see you...” He trailed off shaking his head then giving them a sweet sad smile.

“I’ll call you guys later, I promise. I gotta get back to the share house pronto before people realise I’m not there.” Trevor put a hand calling Jeremy’s name as the young sniper turned and went to the car grabbing his rifle. Matt ran over to the boot, putting a hand on Jeremy’s shoulder. Trevor followed suite in time to hear Matt speaking low.

“Jeremy are you in trouble? Is it A team?” Jeremy shook his head, avoiding their concern, trying to blow it off.

“Nah, your reading too much into this. I’m just tired alright? A teams great, I love those guys,” now he could look up, grinning at them, “Just like I love you guys. And because I love you, I’m going to catch some sleep and get laid before I visit tomorrow.” He swung his rifle on his back and cocked a finger at the two.

“See you tomorrow?”

“Sure Lil’J, tomorrow.” Matt let him go but Trevor couldn’t think of what to say. He just waved back at Lil’J when he jumped the fence and gave them a parting gesture. They watched him jack a ride and only as he peeled around the corner did Trevor catch Matt staring.

“Well that was disturbing.” He commented and Trevor needed to know. They shut up the shed as they discussed Jeremy.

“So what did happen? Exactly?”

“It was weird man, so weird. Everything was normal, I was showing him where to put my new stuff when he was all in my face. Muttering about my eyes.” Trevor gave him a look and matt threw his arms wide defensively, “I know right? Weird! Then I told him to back up and he just grabbed my face so that’s when I shoved him.” Matt shook his head and sighed.

“What the hell was up with him Trevor? Should we pull out of the crew?” matt asked and Trevor gripped the steering wheel hard, the question striking to the heart of him. After a few moments he shook his head.

“Nah, we’ll talk to him tomorrow, see what’s happening. Then we go from there.” He pulled up at the house the two shared and matt was curios when Trevor got out, but followed him instead of finishing his ritual of setting up his cinema. Trevor saw the look between himself and the van and knew the cause.

“Yeah, not in the mind set. I’ll do it tomorrow morning.” He said and matt nodded. However, unnoticed was the notebook held tight in Trevor’s hand.

He needed the comfort.

 

Jeremy knew he was in trouble when he walked into the penthouse and everyone was awake and talking quietly around the dining table. When the door opened, they became silent, Geoff hard and unforgiving, gesturing to Jeremy to have a seat. The sun was beginning to rise, but the main light was the overhead.

Geoff sat at the head of the table, Michael on his right, Ryan on the left. Alex sat across from Geoff and Gavin beside Michael, the golden tongue sheathed behind his golden facemask and looking a little sullen about it. Jeremy reluctantly placed his rifle down on the kitchen counter before he sat next to Ryan. The moment he did so, Ryan snatched a hand, bringing it close to his uncovered face, inspecting Jeremy’s fingers closely.

“Well?” Geoff asked and Ryan threw the lads hand back at him in disgust.

“Washed way too clean. Not a speck of dirt.” Ryan reported and Jeremy hung his head. Geoff sighed, stroking his moustache as he regarded the sniper. Michael had his arms folded, leaning back in his chair looking at the ceiling. Gavin was fooling no one, his phone under the table and Alex just gave a disappointed huff that had Jeremy squirming.

“I’m sorry, I couldn’t help it.” Jeremy started but Geoff cut him off with a wave of his hand.

“Don’t Jeremy. Just don’t.”

Alex tagged in.

“Do you know how often you’ve been saying ‘Sorry’ lately?”

Michael scoffed and looked down from the ceiling to glare at his brother in arms.

“Yeah, Lil’J it’s basically all I hear from you. Yeah I get it, your forgiven for trying to kill me you asshole. Just shut the fuck up already.” Gavin looked up pleadingly at Geoff who shook his head negative. Gavin rolled his eyes and cocked a thumb at Michael, presumably in agreement then looked down at his phone again. Alex snagged it out of his hands, Gavin moaning and pawing after it, the gent ignoring him to talk to Jeremy directly.

“Are Matt and Trevor alive?” he asked as he pocketed Gavin's phone, the brit slumping with his hands on the table. Jeremy looked up alarmed and nodded quickly.

“Yeah, they’re fine last I saw them. I promise Alex I wouldn’t lie.”

“No, just disobey orders.” Geoff said bringing attention to him. Jeremy flushed red and a little fearful at the look he was receiving from his boss.

“You were told to do your little favour then come straight back. It’s now dawn Jeremy. Don’t tell me it took all night to blow one little security light.” Jeremy said nothing so Geoff continued.

“Now Trevor and Matt are ok you say but you’ve played tonight haven’t you?” heavy silence. Geoff slammed a fist into the table making everyone but Ryan jump.

“Answer me Jeremy!”

“Yes.” Jeremy forced out then looked to Geoff pleadingly, looking for understanding, “I was coming home I swear! But I stopped at the lights and no one had the eyes but her. She was smiling and glowing! I didn’t even have to touch her to shine.” And Ryan shook his head slowly, Jeremy falling quiet as the disapproval grew.

“So you killed her?” Geoff asked and Jeremy flushed again and rubbed his arms in a familiar gesture too Ryan, having experienced the feeling himself. Jeremy nodded and Geoff groaned sitting back in his chair. There was a beat then he slammed both his palms down on the table, everyone looking to him.

“Ok! There has been too much fucking around lately. Gavin, you only killed your golden girl like five weeks ago and your already on your phone again. Plus, the landlady keeps asking about you looking red around the eyes. How many times do I have to tell you? Not in the house! Ryan, since you took on Jeremy, between you both you’ve had four toys not to mention the crackerjack rep I fed you in a space of a month and a half. And Michael, don’t think we haven’t noticed you sneaking out again.” Michael spluttered, about to defend himself but Alex got in first.

“We all know about your little side trips asshole. Not subtle stealing from my roofie pile.” Michael also subsided next to Gavin all three Lads put down, Ryan even ashamed before Geoff’s tirade. Then too Geoff’s surprise he looked directly at Alex.

“What?” Alex said confused as Geoff raised an eyebrow.

“When’s the last time you asked for time off for your own pet project?” Geoff asked and Alex grumbled to himself, something about being busy.

“Yeah that’s what I thought.” Geoff said slowly and looked around the table, taking in everyone one by one.

“Now I know it’s an adjustment period for us while Jeremy sorts out his thing, but we cannot go falling apart.” Everyone listened carefully to Geoff, all feeling disappointed in themselves under his authoritative eye. Geoff leant forward, hands clasped together and made sure everyone was looking at him as he laid down the law.

“So here’s what’s going to happen. Ryan, Jeremy, you are both on a murder break starting right now.” He tapped the table with a finger and Jeremy looked devastated while Ryan unfolded.

“Hey! I didn’t kill anyone tonight! That was him,” he tilted his head at Jeremy, eyes defensive as he pleaded with Geoff, “I didn’t even kill the last toy. I can’t do a break right now Geoff.”

“You’ll do as long as I need you too Ryan. Understand?” His voice left no room to defy so Ryan subsided, shooting Jeremy a look that had him fear for his safety when the two were alone again. Gavin had his fingers crossed Michael would be next but no such luck, that heavy gaze landing upon his face.

“Gavin, you never needed a kill so close together before. You can wait another month. Alex’s taking your phone with him, and I don’t want to see you talking to anyone outside our crew without my permission.” Gavin objected, voice muffled by his mask but Alex’s voice was clear.

“I’m taking Gavin's phone where?” he asked his best friend, confused.

Geoff gazed into his face seriously.

“Unlike these asshole’s who’ve been doing nothing lately but causing me stress, you’ve been here helping out. I know you haven’t been to your house in awhile Alex. I know you love us but you need to take some time off.” Geoff spoke low and lovingly to the man who sacrificed everything for his crew without a thought for himself. Ryan was nodding slowly and Michael risked a quick look up, avoiding his own turn but wanting to give Alex a smile. They all knew Alex sometimes slid below the radar, the man so practised at looking after them and made such little fuss about it, they took him for granted. Geoff was the one who always had to catch Alex before he burnt out and now was one of those times.

“Go home for a bit. Take Gavin's phone. Take as long as you need.”

“I can’t leave Geoff. You can’t be everywhere at once. Watching creep and creepier, keeping a hold of Gavin and helping Michael out. Plus we got that Crackerjack thing to do while our info is still fresh.” Geoff was shaking his head slowly with every word, Jeremy stiffening at being called creepy and Michael slumping cursing Alex reminded Geoff of his presence.

“Nice try Jack. Your going home. For at least four days,” his volume increased to drown out Alex’s objections, “AND I can handle things without you! Ryan and Jeremy will be confined too safe house unless I’m with them.” Another gulp from Jeremy from Ryan's furious look.

“Gavin is going to be with me or Lindsay, he can help her with the territory negotiations. Put that tongue to use for the crew instead of his own fun.”

“I’m not here, I’m not here.” Michael was whispering over and over but of course Geoff hadn’t forgotten him.

“Michael here is going to be my shadow while you’re gone. Don’t worry I’ll take care of your lad Al.” It was useless, Alex had to give in. Despite his worry about his beloved crew, in a way he was relived Geoff was forcing this leave on him. Things had been hard lately, alot of stress on his shoulders trying to help them all adjust during this timeframe. Besides he was a little worried about his pet at home.

Pet’s don’t like to be left alone for too long or they start to get destructive. He really didn’t want to start his holiday off picking out a new one.

Geoff saw the moment Alex gave in and grinned.

“If the Crackerjack info expires then that’s fine. It’s no use pushing through with it with everyone out of wack. We need a reset, get our heads back on straight. You guys are more important.” He told them and they felt the love that he had for them, wash away the guilt, everyone readjusting, sitting straight and tall, returning that love with the respect they held for this man who knew them so well and held them all together.

“All right, I’ll visit home, but when I’m back Geoff, I’m at your disposal.” Alex said strongly.

“Yeah Geoff. If you want me to shadow you, consider me attached.” Michael put in, dedication in his voice. Gavin put his personal phone on the table, sliding it away from him dramatically before giving Geoff two thumbs up.

“Murder break and confined to safe houses huh? You’re the boss Geoff.” Ryan said offhandedly then he locked eyes with Geoff, becoming that deadly killer voice, “You are my boss Geoff.” He said with meaning, Geoff acknowledging Ryan's submission with a regal tilt of his head.

The only one not to say anything, or at least indicate in the case of Gavin, was Jeremy. Geoff looked to the youngest member who was glaring at the table.

“Lil’J? You gonna obey?” He asked dangerously and Jeremy looked up surprised Geoff could ask that.

“Yeah, I mean of course I will. You’re the Boss Geoff. It’s just, this is all my fault. All this is because of me.”

“Jeremy it is and it isn’t. You’re not making these asshole’s misbehave,” Geoff gestured around the table, holding Jeremy’s attention, “You just gave the excuse. We’ll just have a little reset time and we’ll be back to it.” Jeremy nodded feeling a bit better then he remembered as he saw the sun rising over the buildings.

“Oh! I promised Trevor and Matt I’d visit them today!”

“The hell you are.” Muttered Ryan and Geoff backed him up.

“No. Call them and they can come visit you here tomorrow.”

“Maybe day after next would be better Geoff. Jeremy is gonna need some time to heal unless he’s ready to tell his friends about his new hobby?” Jeremy shook his head, eye’s wide at the cold threat in those words. The meet broke up soon after, Alex speaking with Geoff first, organising his time off.

Ryan stood up, then got behind Jeremy, hands on his shoulders, fingers digging in cruelly as he leant close.

“Go to my room, sit on the floor at the end of my bed, sit on your hands and put your head back. Strip first, you can keep your pants if you want but I want some skin to work with.” Jeremy quivered imagination supplying why Ryan needed a canvas. A finger trailed down his shoulder in a short line.

“You’ve gotten me in trouble with my boss Jeremy. Don’t tell me you couldn’t help it.”

He straightened up and chuckled, “Oh, we are gonna have a fun sleep over Jeremy.” He said at normal volume, Alex and Geoff looking over at them when Ryan kicked the chair out from under his apprentice and pointed towards the bedroom.

“MOVE! NOW!” Jeremy scrabbled on all fours to his feet and bolted to the bedroom, the others eyes following after. Ryan stood glaring after Jeremy for a moment as Alex said goodnight to Geoff, Michael following close behind the gentle gent, wanting to spend one more day with his favourite before Alex left that afternoon for his house.

Ryan turned to Geoff who had tenderly taken the mask off Gavin, patting the man’s free cheek fondly before sending him to bed. Gavin grinned at Geoff, winked at Ryan before he strolled off for his own room. Now Geoff and Ryan were alone and Geoff was crowding into Ryan's space as the killer did to so many other people.

“I am ordering you not to kill, maim or permanently injury Jeremy.” He said seriously, his face in Ryan's.  Ryan agreed but lifted a finger.

“Can I scar him up just a little? Think of it like a back tattoo.” Geoff rolled his eyes and sighed.

“Fine, but he needs to sleep first, we all do. It’s been a long night.” Geoff went to step by but Ryan caught at his arm.

“Geoff. I really am getting starved. I’ve been putting so much energy to awaking Jeremy.” He looked to Geoff, who was gazing at him knowingly, “I can’t be on break long Geoff.”

Hard fingers pulled his own off Geoff's arm.

“I know buddy.”Geoff said then shoved him hard into the wall. He pressed up against Ryan, gun out and pressed to the spot where Ryan had a hollow scar from the time Geoff shot him. Geoff grinned at him, as Ryan smiled back, understanding between them at the gesture.

“I’ll take care of you Ryan. I promised didn’t I?” he asked and clocked Ryan across the jaw with the gun, making the other gent shout with pain and hold his head coming back up laughing. Geoff holstered his weapon and the two hugged it out, Ryan still rubbing where a lovely bruise would appear within the next hour.

“Get to bed.” Geoff ordered fondly, “I’ll babysit when Trevor and Matt come over for a play date and you do what you need too.” Ryan smiled, painfully but thankful, walking together to the bedrooms, splitting off as they went into different doors.

Ryan was an obedient dog, only putting one tally across Jeremy’s broad shoulders with his personal knife for the first day they were stuck there together before letting the Lad sleep in the prisoner of war position at the end of his bed.

 

Matt looked up from his computer as Trevor walked into his room already on the phone. He pointed at the phone at his ear, mouthing the name ‘Jeremy’ so Matt pushed back from his desk to watch as Trevor sat on the edge of his bed.

“Jeremy it’s cool. If Geoff ordered you to stay at the safe house, of course we get that. Maybe we can come round?” Matt raised an eyebrow, Trevor watching him as he spoke to Jeremy, worry on his face but not in his voice.

“Yeah you do sound kinda rough. Swallow sandpaper or something huh?” Trevor was joking but Matt knew his heart wasn’t in it. Trevor made soft noises of agreement before he spoke again.

“We don’t care about catching a cold man. We haven’t hung out with you properly in forever. We miss you and seeing you the other night wasn’t for long enough.”

Matt scoffed quietly at the mild way Trevor was putting their concern for their friend.

“Ok, so Thursday? Just us three amigo’s? Oh Geoff and Michael huh? That’s cool. Hey what about...” A pause as he listened and matt watched some colour drain from Trevor’s face. He sat forward wanting to ask but Trevor lifted a finger.

“Of course Lil’J. Yeah, I’ll let Matt know. Are you happy at least? Ok then that’s all that matters.” Another longer pause then Trevor was forcing a laugh, “Well as long as I don’t have to sleep with him I don’t care who you date. Alright, we’ll talk later. Yeah no, we’re both fine here. Matt’s just sucking at Destiny and I’m doing some light reading.”

A few more pleasantries then Trevor signed off, hanging up and throwing the phone at Matt’s pillow, falling back onto the bed with a long groan, hands to his face.

“What?! What’s going on?” Matt asked, infuriated by his lack of knowledge. Trevor mumbled something into his hands that Matt couldn’t make out so he kicked Trevor’s knee where it hung over the bed, the skinny man sitting up with a pained cry.

“Trevor!” Matt all but shouted at him, and Trevor rubbed his knee, spitting out, “Jeremy’s dating Vagabond.”

Matt felt his own face drain of colour and Trevor nod.

“Yeah, that’s what I said.” He noted and Matt leant back in his chair, a hand to his forehead.

“Vagabond? Really?’ he questioned Trevor when he remembered how to speak. Trevor nodded, face turning dark, a sick worry deep in his stomach.

“Apparently Jeremy got a bounty for jacking that car. Geoff’s making him stay low until they can sort it out.”

“Fuck that, what about him and vagabond?”

“He said he’s getting a cold, but I know the sound of a bruised larynx any day Matt. I didn’t want to call him on his bullshit over the phone so I just let him go. Then next thing I know he’s telling me that Vagabond is ‘looking after him.’” he threw up airqoute’s disgust in his tone, “That they’re an item now.” He let that sink in, both men wondering what they can do. If vagabond had claimed Jeremy as his own, things were worse than they had imagined.

“We gotta talk to Lindsay.” Matt broke into the heavy silence and Trevor looked up from contemplating his hands.

“She’s on a first name basis with Vagabond, she can talk to Geoff, ask him to order Vagabond to back off Lil’J.”

“If it’s what he wants Matt, who are we to stop him?”

“Because he’s different Trevor! That was way too intense the other night! I’ve never been frightened by Jeremy before, not personally, I mean he’s always been a disturbing motherfucker at times but man I was fucking freaking out when he had me cornered!” matt spat out, worry and anger mixing in his passionate voice. Trevor put his head in his hands as he listened to matt continue.

“When he moved up, I was happy for him, and he always made sure to make time for us and us for him. Don’t tell me you didn’t notice him start drifting from us, getting angry all the time. Then like two months ago, he basically dropped of the earth! Now I love our job Trevor, you know I do, and being dream team is awesome, I wouldn’t have it any other way. Being a FAKEAH is everything we dreamed, but I won’t do it if it means we lose Jeremy.” Trevor felt as if Matt was speaking exactly what he was thinking. Tears were springing up in the long haired thief’s eyes and Trevor grabbed a arm, pulling Matt over to the bed, laying back with him, curling together for comfort.

“Matt, we are going to get to the bottom of this alright?” he said, matt starting to sniffle in Trevor’s arms. Trevor looked up at the ceiling, thinking carefully on what their next step would be.

“We will get Jeremy out Matt,” he said firmly, no idea how but needing to say the words as much as matt needed to hear them, “We will get him back.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ALEX IS 100% next!! i already got most of it done, just rounding it out and proofreading.  
> So maybe i should quickly address realationships here... everyone here swings both ways, depending on what's available. There are no boundrys between crew, they can sleep with each other if the mood takes them (look at michael for exzample) but their not dating each other or anything. More, watever the hell they feel like.  
> Trevor, Matt, Jeremy did have a thing (i'm working on origins) but for the most part are just super close friends  
> Ryan and Jeremy however, well that'll be explained in story shortley ;)  
> Hope that clears any confustion here  
> See you very soon!  
> EDIT: just had to fix a little countinality error in one of matt's dialogue :)


	12. Home sweet Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack holiday told mostly through the eyes of his pet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK here it is! Alexs dark little not so secret, secret! So i had the hardest time trying to write for jack for longest time before Brittany (his pet) started pouring out and suddenly YES here's jacks chapter!  
> For my regular commentors LibbyBell, Ganglylimbs, OokamiTenshi, I know you guys have been waiting patiently.  
> Also to my new commentors and kudosers, thank you for your support, i find i'm more inspired to write when i know there's people reading and enjoying!  
> So mindgames ahead, brainwashing, sense's torture i guess you'd call it i dunno correct me in the comments, mentioned gunvioelence not explicit though, tinest little bit of sex but not in great detail, i guess you could call it no con or possibly rape i dunno you'll see when you get there so just read with cation cause it's a mind that's been re-written talking and who knows what that's gonna trigger  
> Hope you enjoy this one!

Brittany had no idea how long she had been here. The decor was not what she would have chosen for herself, but then again if she could choose, she would choose to leave. But that wasn’t an option. She was trapped here in this bunker, redecorated to resemble a home from the eighties but had all the comforts of the twenty first century.

A wide screen TV and two full cupboards full of DVD’s, TV series and different games with the stations to play them. There were bookshelves of books covering a range of nonfiction, from biographies to cookbooks and Fiction, from fantasy too crime stories. The furniture was divine, soft and comfortable, the bed was king sized. The laundry room had industrial sized units, a dryer and even a line for those delicates that couldn’t be tumble dried. There was a gym stocked with all equipment you didn’t need a partner to spot you. That equipment came out when he came to visit.

The pantry was stocked full of all kinds of foods and staples needed to survive for a long time. There was a massive freezer with different meats and cold treats all neatly organised. All she needed to do was grab something and place it in the fridge ready for the next day. Or night. Or whatever the time was.

Everything in the house that had a clock setting had a different time setting on it. She could keep track of minutes and hours but had no idea of days or weeks. That was a reward for when he came home.

There was only one door in and out, a thick metal door on electronic hinges with a keypad next to the bolt.

Britt had been dosing on the couch, a book on her chest when she heard the door whine then the heavy bolt shot back. She leapt to her feet, book dropping onto the ground as she spun to face him coming through the door. He crinkled his kind green eyes at her, a smile splitting his goatee when he spotted her. The door thunked close, the lock reengaging.

“Alex!” she cried and all her fear melted away just in the enthusiasm of seeing another human face. Even if it was the man who put her here. He held out his arms and she ran to him, being embraced gently but firmly, as she started to sob involuntarily.

“Oh darling, oh pet, come on now don’t cry. I’m here now.” Alex soothed, patting his hands down her back, rocking slightly trying to comfort her. Brittany couldn’t stop the flow of tears even with the gentle command, loneliness having driven her into his arms. He picked her up, cradling her sweetly, his beautiful deep voice murmuring tender nothings as she held him tightly with both hands.

She barely registered when he sat on the couch, her body pooled on his lap.

“Pet, sweetheart. Shh. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to leave so long. I didn’t. Things just got so hectic with the guys... they needed me and I knew you’d be safe here a little longer.” She nodded into his chest, not because she understood but because she knew it was expected of her. Now with the first wave of relief at seeing him going down, she started to calm and sniffle, her cries petering off into hiccups.

“There we go darling. You were so happy to see me I didn’t even get a chance to show you my gifts.” Alex said and she leant back a bit to peek up at his face which was shining with care and sympathy. Alex nodded at the door where she had ambushed him and she spotted a few bags, most likely containing more clothes, books, etc. But what captured her attention completely was a carry cage for a cat, the tiny thing already curled up against the bars.

A kitten!

She looked to Alex, quivering with excitement and he nodded happily at her. She was off his lap in a moment, throwing herself down next to the carry cage, finger poking in to touch the live creature, the first living thing she had seen besides Alex himself since he brought her here.

Alex’s steps came up behind her but she was focused on the small creature that had turned to start licking her hand with a raspy tongue.

“I thought I better get you some company since I’m not going to be here for awhile.” Alex rumbled behind her, the words sending a chill down her spine. Alex normally came out to see her on a regular basis. When he came, that’s when the dates and times would be set correctly, Britt memorising the dates to notice it was every two to three weeks he’d come spend a night to three nights with her. This time had felt longer, the freezer dipping low on supplies and Britt had passed time eyeing off the kitchen knife set.

There was a ritual that she had learnt to his visits and as much as her heart cried to take the kitten out, cuddle it and let it soothe her, she was trained better than that. She slowly stood, turning to face him, a smile plastered on her face.

“Thank you Al,” she said hoarsely, out of practise with speaking, “I love it. And I can’t wait to see what else you brought me.” Always praise the gifts but before looking at them, must take care of Alex.

“But you’ve just gotten home, are you hungry?” she asked. He smiled at her gratefully and nodded his larger head. She grabbed his hand, calluses from his job as a FAKEAH rubbing against her own palm as she led him to the kitchen.

Sit him down as you cook. Listen to everything he says. PAY ATTENTION. Parrot back parts, seem interested.

The cruel thing was she was interested. He told her everything, held nothing back. After all who could she tell? Alex was the second for a powerful crew boss, Geoffrey Ramsey of the FAKEAH. Together they ran a deadly empire of dangerous and unhinged people. They had a serial killer, a pyromaniac and a stalker, just for starters. She cooked him up a quick pasta dish, pouring him a drink to sip as she asked how he had been, hearing how Alex’s younger crewmate had become a sort of apprentice to the serial killer.

“So Geoff told me to take some time off, come see you. He knows how much I miss you when I’m working. Did I ever tell you about the first time I met Geoff?” She shook her head negative, sliding the bowl in front of him as he was speaking. The cat started to yowl and Alex had a twitch of irritation in his face at the noise. Brittany fought back the panic at the sight, getting up and kissing his cheek, giving his shoulder a rub.

“I’ll just put my presents away really quickly ok? You won’t even notice I’m gone I’ll be back so fast.” She said brightly and he nodded, happy again. He rubbed his nose against hers.

“You take such good care of me Pet.” He praised and she felt a thrill of happiness that she had said the right thing. She hurried over, being careful with the bags, taking them into her room. Then she took the Kitten cage and the accompanying supplies into the laundry. She set up the tray of kitty litter, threw some toys on the floor and opened the cage door. As the little grey fuzz ball came out slowly, she set up its food and water. She showed it where to get food and risked a quick snuggle into her neck before placing it back down on the floor, a shirt of hers for a blanket.

She shut the laundry door and rushed back to Alex who was just finishing his dinner. He brightened when he saw her, smacking his lips and gesturing to the bowl.

“Delicious! What recipe did you use?” he asked and she obediently showed him the cookbook she had been working through. He kissed her cheek and she tidied up at lightning speed as Alex pottered around, fixing the dates and times on the TV, laptop, (no internet of course), DS’s and the white clock in the living room. He then settled onto the couch with a groan and Brittany took a quick glance at the date as she hurried over too take Alex’s shoes and prepare his foot treatment.

She gasped and he looked at her where she had paused, staring at the Laptop screen at the date.

“Pet?” he asked, his tone just slightly on the lighter side of dangerous. She hurried over, pulling his shoes off and putting them by the door.

“Pet, you know I was busy. I told you all about Jeremy.” He said as she scrambled about grabbing cream and clothe, cueing up the show they had been watching together from where he left it, all the while blinking back tears.

It had been five weeks since his last visit.

“I understand,” she forced herself to say, hiding her utter despair, “You do such a good job taking care of those guys, now relax and let me take care of you.”

She dug her fingers into the bottom of Alex’s feet and he groaned blissfully. Brittany shut off her mind, concentrating only on how he enjoyed his foot rubs and the storyline upon the screen. Alex would be sure to quiz her later, making sure she wasn’t zoning out in his presence.

Alex started to doze off, chin dipping then coming up again. In her sweetest voice, as another episode drew to a close, Brittany spoke up.

“Alex, why don’t you have a nice relaxing shower? I’ll go get your towels and prepare the bed?” Alex nodded, rubbing his eyes, pushing his palms into his eyes with a yawn. He sighed out and she hurriedly wiped his feet clean of product so he could stand. He bent, kissing her head softly.

“I won’t be long. Put your presents away and tomorrow we’ll name our new kitten huh?”

“I’d love that.” She said, her voice quivering but even she had no idea with what emotion. He left for the bathroom and she knew she had about ten to fifteen minutes. She blasted through, cleaning up in the lounge room, turning everything off. She hurried and grabbed his towels, ones that were only brought out when he was here, bringing them into the bathroom.

The shower hissed beside her, it’s glass fogged up with the shape of Alex behind it. She paused, admiring the curve of his body, the shape of his muscled arms as they ran over his hair, the sheen of moisture over light brown skin. She had been alone so long, no human contact whatsoever, no warmth, no touching, no nothing...

“Pet?” his voice snapped her out of it, “Pet? Are you done the chores? Did you want to join me?” She shook her head and giggled nervously, “Ah no not yet. Just putting your towels in here before I make up the bed.”

“Alright, well I’m almost done.” He warned and she hurried out, changing the dirty sheets for the soft, black and dark green one’s Alex preferred. She changed into her pyjama’s, the pink ones with little piglets on them. Alex’s favourite on her. She sorted through her presents quickly, putting the new clothes away, memorizing a tiny detail from each so as to convey her enjoyment of them. There was a new book, the next in a series she had read over and over in an attempt to forget her isolation. There was also some new release movies, these she held to her chest like tressure, proof the real world still was out there.

She out away the DVDS then into the laundry to check on the kitten who was crying pitifully, loneliness in its mewls. She sat down and pulled it into her lap, patting and soothing it, as tears leaked down her face. She understood the poor kittens cry. To lose everyone in one day was hard. Brittany would know. But now she wouldn’t be alone, even after Alex left.

She and the Kitten were in this together now.

She startled when a heavy hand landed on her shoulder. Alex’s skin was still heated from his shower, he was mostly dry but with only the towel wrapped around his waist.

“You weren’t in bed.” He said tonelessly and Brittany quickly got to her feet, putting the kitten back in its little cage, wiping her eyes subtly as she did so.

“Oh, yes. I just put the last of my gifts away and settle the kitten in so it won’t wake you tonight.” She said quickly, turning to see him watching her, face expressionless. She gathered her courage and put a hand on his arm, bouncing onto her toes to peck his cheek.

“You’re always so tired the first night home. I just wanted to make sure you’ll have a full sleep.” He melted back into his happy self and she knew a crisis had been avoided. He nodded and put an arm around her waist. He flicked of the light and shut the door, guiding them towards the bedroom.

“I missed you so much.” She said and found it wasn’t a lie as Alex pulled his towel from his waist and slipped into the sheets. He smiled at her, patting the bed beside him.

“I missed you too. Come on. I’ve been missing sleeping next to you. It’s just not the same with one of the guys. They aren’t as snugly as you are.” She got in, the bunker always at a little cooler temperature, perfect to cuddle under blankets. She wasn’t worried cuddling with Alex anymore.

It was with practised ease that she lay back against the pillows, Alex pressing into her side, large arms wrapping around her and a leg thrown across hers. He settled his head on her chest, and she put one hand on the arm that encircled her, the other in his hair stroking softly. He hummed enjoyment at her ministrations and closed his eyes.

She had been terrified at first of Alex and what he could possibly want from her. When you wake up to find yourself confined to a bunker, a man many times larger than you keeping you captive, you made assumptions. But Alex, if you overlook the fact he was holding her captive against her will, was an extremely gentle and kind person. Brittany figured out quickly, all Alex wanted was to play house. To be cared for as he, by his own stories at least, took care of others.

That wasn’t to say there were not consequences to bad behaviour.

So when she awoke some time later, hearing the faint mewl of the kitten, she wasn’t sure what to do. Alex was asleep, holding her possessively. She was not to move until he awoke. She felt for the kitten, hearing its cries echo her own that she had made, many a night here. When it’s cries started to turn hysterical she decided to get up before it woke Alex.

It was a risk, but Alex did not like to be woken from his sleep as much as she was not allowed to move. It was a careful art of placing pillows and shimming out of his grip. She managed it and tiptoed out to the laundry. The moment the kitten saw her it came bounding over and her heart was lost.

“Oh little one, were you scared you’d never see me again?” she asked softly as she sat down, letting the kitten curl into her hand, petting it and soothing it.

“Your thought you were on your own huh? I get that. Being the sole occupant of this place.” The kitten mewled happily and pounced from her lap onto a toy, little back legs working to scratch up the toy. She watched him feeling amusement build at his antics. Then she had a thought for his name.

“I think I’ll name you Sole. Would you like that? The sole kitty in my home.” She giggled at the appropriateness of the name and the slight irony that now there were two occupants. She had a fluffy little roommate now, even when Alex leaves, she won’t be alone. Something to pet, to cuddle, to hear its heart beat.

She played with the kitten, coaxed it into eating and cried quietly when it fell asleep in her lap. Mindful of how long she had been gone, she put the kitten gently into its cage and brushed herself off before heading back to bed. When she looked in, she saw Alex hadn’t moved and breathed a soft sigh of relief.

She snuck back around to her side and begun the process of getting back into position without waking him. It took some time but she finally managed it, his head back on her chest where he could hear her heart. His hand tightened a little on her waist and she held her breath.

Nothing.

She sighed it out again.

“You left me.” His voice said from his seemingly asleep face. She felt her body go cold and the hand on his head started stroking, trying to soothe.

“You left the bed. Why? Do you not like sleeping here with me?”

“Of course I do Alex. I love when your home.” She said quickly and he lifted his head to look at her face. She hoped in the dim he couldn’t read the panic at the corner of her eyes as she pasted on a wide smile.

“Why did you leave?”

“The kitten. It was meowing again. It’s only young. I quieted it down so it wouldn’t wake you. Your rest is so important to me Al, you never get enough when you leave. I care about you so much.” She was throwing up as many excuses as she could, feeling his hand grow tighter and tighter, fingers digging painfully into her hip. As she told him she cared however, his grip loosened and he smiled at her.

“You really care about me?” he asked, his voice hopeful. She nodded, so happy she hit upon the right combination of words that she had to blabber on.

“Of course I do. So very much. You don’t take care of yourself, always looking out for others. So I want to take care of you, make you happy and I couldn’t let Sole-“

“Sole?!” Alex sat up and Brittany flinched away from the hurt and anger in his voice.

“T-The K-kitten-“ she tried to stammer out an explanation but Alex’s cry cut across her.

“You named him without me?! I said we’d choose a name together!” Brittany backed up against the head board, Alex loaming over her, his face close to make out hers in the gloom.

“You’re the same! Always the same! Selfish! Greedy! Cruel! Did you not care about my opinion or did you forget about me all together huh? Like everyone always does!” She put up a shaking hand, mouthing denials but all that did was give Alex something to grab. He seized her wrist, Brittany sobbing now as he yanked her from the bed. He started to drag her into the hall, unheedful if that she couldn’t get her feet beneath her, just ranting.

“Everyone forgets about me! Everyone overlooks me! Just because I don’t kill for funsies. Because I have some sort of morals. ‘Oh ho let’s all laugh at boring, idiot Alex!’ Well I’ll show you. I’ll show you how it feels to be ignored, to be shunted aside.” Brittany begged and cried, her other hand trying to loosen his grip, fighting against his pull.

“Please! Please no Alex! please I’m sorry! I’m so sorry! I love you please!”

“Lies! Always lies!” Alex roared and she was brought, kicking and screaming to the last door in the hall. Another keypad beside it. Alex hit the buttons angrily and the door hissed open revealing a dog cage in the centre of the room. Brittany screamed at the sight of it so hard she tasted blood.

“Be ignored! Be forgotten!” Alex forced her inside, smacking her hands where they gripped his shirt, begging.

“Alex no! I love you! I’ll take good care of you! Please just no!” His face was resolute and with hard hands that left bruises where he shoved, he managed to get her in. He locked the door with a human proof safety lock as Brittany curled up in the tiny space, unable to stretch further then a crawl, screaming and sobbing hysterically. Unlike the rest of the bunker, this light had no dimmers just a simple on off. Alex stood at the door, finger on the switch.

“You will learn to love me.” He said deadpan and flicked the light off, slamming the door on her scream.

 

Geoff checked his buzzing phone and put up a finger to the men gathered in the airport shed. A small plane full of weapons were behind them and they looked a bit put out that he was taking a call in the middle of negations but Mogar was beside him, his diamond bright bat over his back and a carbine held loosely in his grip by his side.

Geoff took the call.

“Hey buddy, this important?” he asked and sighed when he heard soft sobs.

“She doesn’t love me anymore Geoff.” He looked to the skies for strength then put a hand over the mouth piece turning to the three men waiting on him.

“I gotta take this, very important call. It’s the price we agreed upon or Mogar here kills you and we take it anyway.” He says with finality and walks away, out the door and around the side, ignoring protests and after a few moments, the sounds of gunfire broken quickly with Mogar profanity and the thumps of metal hitting flesh.

“Ok Al. What happened? Was she upset you’d been gone so long?”

“She took it pretty well. Said she understood. I got us a kitten. You know something for us to care for together.”

“That sounds really cool. She must have been happy.”

“She loves it more than me!” Alex cried out then broke down over the line. Geoff sighed, running a hand through his hair and glancing back at the shed where Michael was leaning against the opening, stitching a graze on his arm from a bullet with his pocket kit.

“I’m sure she doesn’t Al. It’s just new and a baby. You know people and little fuzzy cute things.”

“So I’m not cute? Is that why she doesn’t love me?” Geoff turned, frustration in his voice and he gestured as if Alex could see him.

“Now that’s not what I said.”

“Come over? Please?”

“I did that once remember?”

“Geoff, I know you love me. We’d be great together! I’d take such good care of you, you know I would.” Michael looked up as Geoff flushed, cocking an eyebrow at his boss but not saying anything when Geoff turned in his pacing again.

“Alex, I love you too. You know my door is always open to you, you snugly son of a bitch but I’m not coming over.”

“See?! You don’t care either! No one does!” Alex started to sob again and Geoff cursed the stupid woman who was supposed to be caring for his friend who instead was making him worse than when he had left.

“Alex, I’m sure when you go back down, you’ll find she really does love you. I mean I’m assuming you gave her time to think about it?” A heartbroken hum of assent.

“And maybe get rid of the cat? It might have been too soon for her that’s all.” He heard Alex sniffling, imagined the second wiping his face, nodding and getting back under control.

“Your right Geoff. I just pushed her too quick. Getting a cats a big step to take and I never asked.” Another sniffle and jacks voice sounded stronger if a bit hoarse.

“Thanks Geoff.”

“Anytime Al. You know I love you right?”

“I love you too. Pass it on to the guys.”

“Will do, now go be with your pet huh? She’s probably already crying for you.” Alex gave a wet chuckle and hung up. Geoff checked his phone, made sure Alex was gone before he looked up to Michael.

“How was it?” he asked and Michael gestured to his blood coated arm.

“Just the one graze, I hope you don’t mind, I didn’t wait for their choice. Didn’t want to give them a chance to get the drop on me.” Geoff nodded started back in, three bodies piled up. Near the plane.

“You’re flying this time, I gotta make some calls, Lindsay is going to be all over my ass.”

“You're the boss aren’t you?”

“yeah but I ain’t gonna tell her that.” Geoff said and Michael grinned a little savagely, admiration in his face for the steel spined girl with a fire obsession and an intelligence to run an empire for Geoff.

“Wise. I’d let her be in fucking charge too.” He said, imagining those passionate eyes meeting his, actually seeing him, the chaos they could cause together. Maybe he should visit Gavin, he was hanging out with Lindsay on Geoff’s orders lately. It couldn’t hurt to see how they were doing would it?

 

Noises and movement tormented Brittany in her cage. She stayed curled up even as her muscles seized and cramped. She had fought the confinement before and it only resulted in more pain. She tried to float out of her body but was unable to fully leave. The sound of her heart was too loud in her ears, her breaths sawing in and out of her lungs. Every part of her ached and her mind played tricks on her.

She couldn’t tell the difference between eyes open and eyes shut. She wasn’t sure if she had slept. She knew she must have been here some time as she felt wetness pool around her hip, wetting herself, unable to hold on longer. It dried and she stayed still. Maybe she’d die here.

Perhaps she already had.

She would be so good to Alex if he came back. Poor Alex. Is this how he felt all the time? No wonder he wanted her. And she would care for him forever if only he’d come get her. She had hurt him so badly. Naming the kitten without him had been so cruel. He had been so excited to name it with her and she had selfishly taken that from him.

She swore she’d love him forever if he’d just come get her.

She whimpered and shied away when light cut across the floor, stabbing into her brain. She cried out when the door swung open and kind hands helped her unfold from her space. Alex’s voice was soothing, wonderful to her ears after so much silence. She couldn’t walk, legs locked stiff but he graciously carried her to the bathroom, sliding her into a warm tub that had her crying out again at the sensation.

“Shh pet. I’m here. I’m here for you. Shh I know my pet, I know.” He assured her, cleaning her and helping strip the soaking soiled pyjamas from her body. Dimly she knew she was speaking, trying to tell him everything she had learnt.

“Love you, love you. Love Al. Poor Alec. Want. Want love Alex. Need to love Alex.” she was mumbling variations causing the mocha man to break into an affectionate smile. He patted her down with a soft towel and helped her dress again, Brittany still weak but starting to remember how to move her aching limbs. He still carried her to the bed, tucking her in and feeding her like a child, little sips of soup and water. Brittany cried to be so loved, wishing she had more strength so she could hug this man who cared so deeply for her.

Once she had enough, he put it to the side and tucked her in he went to move away but she panicked.

“DON’T LEAVE!” she screamed, lunging for him, sobbing until he came back, letting her pull him into their sleeping positions, the woman shaking hard and crying, pawing at him weakly.

“Love you, I love you Alex. I want you here with me always.” She was saying and he let her love wash over him, cleansing him of the rejection he felt deep in his heart. The couple fell asleep together both clinging as tight as they could.

 

Alex woke up, alone again. His hand fisted the sheets where she had once been and felt the coldness of rejection once more. He felt tears prickle in his eyes and wondered what was so wrong with him that she always ran. His pet, despite her words, didn’t want him.

“Good your awake!” a voice cried happily and he turned, putting on his glasses so his pet came into focus. She was smiling at him, a coyness to her eyes that delighted him as he looked to what she carried. A tray with a plate of Bacon eggs and sausages, a steaming mug of coffee and a smaller plate of buttered bread.

“I thought, since you gave me dinner in bed. I’d treat you to breakfast.” She said slowly, seeking approval which he gave. He sat up properly, beaming.

“Oh pet! This is a great surprise.” He said and she sat up against his side, putting the tray on their legs, smiling shyly at him as she prepared a bite.

“I just want to take care of you Alex. I love you so much, you’re so good to me. Here. Can I?” He had tried to take the fork from her but she gestured that she would feed him, asking permission. He nodded and she gently started to feed him each bite, her delicate fingers dabbing a napkin at his mouth as needed. He felt cherished and loved as his pet served him everything he wanted.

After the hiccup of the first night, things were everything he wanted. Pet made no mention of the kitten, now missing, all it’s things gone. Nor did she make a fuss over the clocks and dates being randomised once more. Alex had the only timepiece, his phone, kept on him at all times and forbidden to Pet. She dressed to impress him, twirling around in the outfits he had bought her, showing off her enjoyment of his taste in clothes.

She cooked every meal, waving off his offers saying he needed feeding up, that he had neglected himself while away and she’d bring him back to health. They showered together, Pet washing him, soft fingers soaping him down and towelling him off when they got out. He wasn’t going to push himself on her. He was a gentleman and would wait on her to offer herself. That way he would know she wanted him. That he was desirable.

He came back from checking in with Geoff, this call alot happier then the last. He found his pet sobbing into his pillow and he rushed to pat her, wondering if she was sick. When he touched her she cried out and threw herself at him, hysterical.

“I thought you had left again!” she sobbed and he felt his heart sink. He was going to leave very soon. It had been a wonderful week here but Geoff needed him back. Geoff hadn’t said anything but Alex could tell something had been up. Geoff's voice was strained and he heard Michael raging as if from a separate room, Gavin's golden voice trying to calm him just out of focus.

Right now though he concentrated on his beloved pet as she held him hard to her, crying into his ear.

“I love you Alex. I love you please don’t leave. Please don’t! Stay here with me. I’ll be so good to you. I’ll make you so happy.” The words he used on others were now being whispered into his ear by a broken and wet voice, sloppy kisses being pressed to his cheek, his goatee, his forehead.

“Please Alex, I need you. You need to stay. I love you. Love me Alex. Love me back and never leave again.”

His breath caught when she brushed against him, kissing him desperately.

“You want me?” he asked, unsure if she wanted him like this even as her hands were working under his shirt, trying to touch as much of his skin as possible, her legs wrapping around him, keeping him against her.

“Yes Alex. I want you. I want you close. I want you with me, in me, just don’t leave me.” She was crying and offering herself up to Alex, who couldn’t resist such an offer. They tumbled into bed and she cried sweetly the whole way through as he made love to her. She drove him to new heights, moaning underneath him as he moved inside her, chanting his name and begging all the while for him to stay here, stay with her.

His pet fell asleep, still clinging tightly to him, unable to bare him moving away, not even to clean the mess they had made. He hummed softly, stroking her head, admiring the curve of her chin, the delicate veins on her eyelids. He imprinted her image into his mind, his entire being full of the love she felt for him. This week had an extremely satisfying end for him.

The tears he cried for his pet were bittersweet, she had died still wrapped around him, never feeling the pinch of the needle. It’s how he had wanted it. Now she would never know he had to leave again and he’d always remember their last night together, wrapped up in love and care, giving and receiving from each other. He slept deeply and well, hugging her too him even after her grip had gone limp.

That morning he carried her out into the sunshine, wrapped in the blankets they had loved in. He placed her reverently on the ground and had called Geoff for a pick up, knowing he would be in no condition to drive after the funeral. He was quite a ways out into the nothingness around Sandy shores so it took time for Geoff to arrive.

In that time, Alex had dug the grave, laid her tenderly in it, the new book he had brought her but she never read placed atop the small wrapped figure. Geoff was there in time to slid a hand across Alex’s broad shoulders, the sweat making his shirt stick.

“She gave herself over huh?” Geoff asked sadly, looking down at his friends beloved pet. Alex nodded, sniffling and wiping his nose with a hand.

“She loved me so dam much Geoff. I couldn’t leave her again. I just couldn’t.” Geoff patted Alex and when the taller man started to sob, pulled him into his arms.

“You did the right thing Al. She would be so proud of you for making such a tough decision.” He petted Alex and let his friend cry out his grief, ignoring the blaring sun beating down upon them or the slight stink rising from the hole. When Alex took some deeper steadying breaths, he stood straighter and Geoff peered into his face trying to see into his eyes.

“You’ll see her again don’t worry. And when you do, we’ll be there to help you grab her.”

“She never remembers me Geoff.” He said sadly, gesturing at the hole.

“Death always makes her so forgetful.” Geoff grinned that lazy grin Alex enjoyed, mock punching his shoulder, “Ahh, but that’s what you love about her right? Right?” he pointed as Alex started to smile, his grief easing as he nodded.

“Yeah that’s what I thought. I’ve said it before, I’m so jealous of you guys. Getting to fall in love over and over again. That’s something really special. Now come on. I’ll help you finish here and we’ll head home.” Alex nodded again and grabbed a shovel, Geoff having brought his own. Together they piled the sand back into the hole, Alex watching as his love was slowly devoured by the blankness of the desert.

Geoff put his shovel away and Alex let his drop where it was, seeing only his love’s face before his eyes.

“I will see you again. I will always look out for you. I love you Alexis.”

Geoff waited by the car as Alex disappeared down into his bunker, putting the shovel away and turning off the lights. He sighed and looked at his watch, knowing that soon he’d have to tell Alex what had happened during his holiday. For now though, he looked out over the desert, wondering how many times Alex will call him here, another curly haired brunette buried in a Hawaiian shirt, before Alex finally accepts what could not be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soo hope that was worth waiting for, personally I think it came out better then i was origanaly planing, geoff wasn't ever meant to be in there but of course he's Alexs oldest bestest and closest friend...who will never go down those stairs ever lol  
> next chapter is a little shorter, just establishing a few things before we get into what happened the 7 days Alex was gone... Any sudgestions for me or feedback please chuck in the comments, kudos as it takes you and as always i hoped you enjoyed but i'm not the boss of you  
> see you in the next chapter


	13. In a Way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Holiday :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Geoff knows his family well enough that when he orders a break, everyone is actaully kinda happy about it  
> just wanted to set the feel for what everyone was doing during the break Alex was away. this only covers the first tiny bit of the holiday, just so you know that it's not all murdery stab stab crazyness all the time. Sometimes they just like to hang out :)  
> I guess it's kinda fluff? in a 'they are all disturbed and crazy people' kinda fluff?

In a way, Michael was thankful Geoff had pulled him up. He had started taking too sneaking out after the incident with Jeremy. He believed he was dead, that Jeremy really was going to kill him and he found out; He didn’t want to die.

Ever since then, the buzz and pleasure he had gotten from being so mistreated had ebbed. The adrenaline rush wasn’t enough from that anymore and it put him on edge. Every hand put on him was triggering his fight or flight reflex. And Michael always came out fighting. Gavin had been good enough not to tell the others.

Gavin had snuck in, the soft knocks barley registered in Michaels sleeping brain before Gavin had been atop him. His mind went blank and he didn’t even think about safety words, just needing to get those grasping hands off his hips. Gavin had thought he was just wanting a bit more rougher until Michael had thrown him off and landed solid punches into his gut.

They had bound Gavin's ribs tightly and even though between them, they thought Geoff suspected, he didn’t call them on it. So Michael started sneaking out again. If he couldn’t trust his crew not to hurt him or himself not to hurt them back, then he’d get his thrills elsewhere.

But that hadn’t worked either. It just wasn’t doing the same thing it used too and a rise in neck snaps was coming about in Los Santos. He tried drugging himself but he’d become aware of himself, over the body of a half naked man, fists still landing in the pulp that had been a face.

So yeah, In a way he was glad Geoff was keeping him close.

From the moment Alex had hugged him goodbye, the two having cuddled all day without the pressure of sex, Geoff had been there. Geoff told him he had cancelled the deal, Michaels sneaking out having put everyone in danger from unknown Diseases. They went to the hospital, Gavin coming with them leaving Ryan and Jeremy alone with strict orders not to leave the share house.

They hadn’t even been out the door before they heard Jeremy crying out and Ryan laughing. Geoff made no mention of it so both Gavin and Michael had left it be, the last time they had poked their head in still fresh in their minds. Michael was worried about Jeremy sure, but he also knew that Geoff wouldn’t let the fun faced lad be hurt by Ryan unless it was something the sniper wanted. Michael of all people understood how thrilling it could be to be hurt.

If only he could get that thrill now.

It was all but confirmed that Geoff knew about Gavin's ribs when he told the lad to wait in the X-ray waiting room as they walked on to blood tests. When they picked him up, Michael pressing the inside of his elbow, Gavin’s shirt was back to front. Geoff rolled his eyes at the idiot and Michael heard him mutter, “Subtle.” Under his breath as he walked a little faster, giving the lads some privacy.

“Nothing broken, only bruised boi.” Gavin assured Michael who felt a flush of shame.

“I’m sorry Gavvers.” He said but Gavin waved him off.

“Don’t worry about it. Like I haven’t done worse to you.” He waggled his eyebrows suggestively and Michael shoved him to the side, Gavin walking straight into the wall by the door, stumbling back and holding his face.

“Ow! My nose!” he mumbled as Michael laughed.

“If it wasn’t so fucking huge, maybe you would have seen where you’re going fucking idiot.” He taunted and Geoff called to them to hurry up. Feeling better, Michael got in the passenger side, Geoff insisting on driving.

He took them to a meet up, Lindsay meeting them there with her own personal second slash bodyguard. A deceptively slight woman with two toned hair and a wicked smile called Mica. Michael got out, tipping his curls at Lindsay who smiled brightly at him. Gavin came up beside him and nudged him with an elbow as Lindsay turned her attention to Geoff who took her hand and pulled her in to kiss her cheek in greeting. Michael nudged Gavin back. Hard.

Leaving Gavin spluttering, he took his place next too Geoff and slightly behind his boss. Mica had the same position next to Lindsay and Gavin brought up the rear muttering darkly and holding his side. They went inside where a smaller crew unrelated to theirs was waiting.

It was boring. He didn’t get to do anything but stand next to Geoff and glare. Lindsay and Gavin worked together, Lindsay bringing up the points and Gavin selling them. Mica looked equally as bored, picking at her nails with a throwing knife she had pulled from god knows where. The two guards met eyes at one point and she rolled them in a gesture he returned.

Their negotiators finished, Both Geoff and the other crew boss stepped forward to seal the deal their underlings had just set out before them with a firm shake of hands. Michael stiffened, alert as Geoff moved closer but this was an unnecessary precaution. No one attempted to kill his boss and so he was bored atop of being on edge.

“Hey Michael.” Lindsay said as they gathered around their cars once more.

“What’s up linds?”

“So Mica here brought me a tasty little traitor. Been passing out our product to his cousins to resell. Wanna come over for a bomb fire tomorrow night?”

“Fuck yes.” He crowed and suddenly felt a hell of a lot better, the nameless emptiness that had been gnawing away at him retreating under the fire in Lindsay’s eyes.

“Count me the fuck in.”

 

In a way, Gavin was happy Geoff had pulled him up. Cynthia had been everything and more than he had been hoping for. He was testing the waters with multiple other subjects before Alex had taken his phone but all it was doing was making him frustrated. It had been frustration that had driven him to the roof, and frustration that had him talk to the landlady who had been smoking out there.

He was so stressed about his next kill not being as fulfilling as the last that he had forgotten to live his life. His crew was so important to him, his little family of mingy wankers who he adored. He couldn’t remember the last time he had just hang out with them. Everyone had been wrapped up in their own things.

Jeremy had basically disappeared from the moment he started watching Ryan work. Ryan himself had been all killer no diet coke drinking dork lately. Michael had been more demanding than ever when he was home, which wasn’t often, trying to chase whatever weirdness that made him love to be used. Alex had been on edge, trying to deal with everyone else’s problems that he’d been ignoring his own needs again.

So yeah, in a way he was glad Geoff had ordered this break.

Gavin amused himself making kissy noises in the back, Geoff chuckling as Michael exploded.

“Shut the fuck up Gavin you fucking retard! The fuck are you doing back there fucking sucking your own dick you fucking cockgobbler! Fucking shut your fucking god dam stupid mouth! Fuck!”

“Michael, don’t be like that boi. New love and all. Aren’t you meant to be happy?” he cooed, impervious to Michaels rage.

“I’m going to fucking happily come back there and punch your fucking skull through your head if you don’t stop making those fucking sounds!” he threatened and Gavin couldn’t resist giving another wet sounding kiss that had Michael throwing himself into the back. The two wrestled, Michael swearing, Gavin squawking and laughing as Geoff tried to yell at them to stop.

Gavin ribs ached, Michael was laughing as he pulled his punches, Geoff sniggering in the front. Gavin smiled as they played, happy his boi was seemingly in a good mood and privately vowing he was going to that little bomb fire. Mica had winked at him he was sure and it had been a bit since he’d been with a woman. Especially a woman that promised that bit of danger and passion Gavin loved. He knew tomorrow night was going to be wonderful.

He hoped Geoff would let Jeremy come.

 

In a way, Jeremy was glad Geoff had ordered them to stay home. It gave him time to explore this new thing with Ryan. His shoulder ached where Ryan had sliced him, the stiches itching where Ryan had patched him up again. The moment the others had left, Ryan had kicked him from the aching position he had held, dozing upright for hours. They had fought as only two men with their training could.

Jeremy wasn’t an up-close fighting expert like Ryan was, but he held his own, giving as good as he got. Fists, feet and teeth entered the fray, lips and faces splitting, chest and backs colouring, knuckles cracking against bone. Ryan had won, grabbing a pillowcase and wrapping it around Jeremy’s neck as the lad tried to tear at his arm with his teeth. When the world tipped black, he was allowed to breathe again and he tapped the floor panting. Ryan had lifted him up and placed him gentle on the bed.

They were both in a bad way, Ryan's vision was blurred from a gash above his eye, his entire jaw now had a matching bruise on the opposite side to Geoff's hit. Jeremy had not one but two splits in his lip and privately wondered if he’d soon have a scar on the bottom lip from repeated injury. His shoulder ached, having popped out then back in during the fight.

Ryan had bites on his arm and funnily enough, one in his calf. He refused to tell Lil’J that the apprentice had broken three of his fingers. His entire torso was bruised up just like Jeremy’s but that didn’t stop the shorter man, after catching his breath, to roll onto of Ryan and start rubbing up against him.

Jeremy felt more then heard the growl Ryan gave and he grinned as Ryan grabbed his head, forcing his bloodied lips to the gents own. Injuries were ignored as they rolled about, working themselves up, Jeremy trying to stay on top only to be beaten back to the bottom. Ryan took him hard and fast, Jeremy knowing that as much as they played, this was where they would always end up. Ryan was in charge and that gave Jeremy the security he needed to deal with his growing power and need, awash in the golden glow.

So yeah, In a way Jeremy was glad Geoff had ordered them to stick together.

They panted together, exhausted, the bed a mess of sex and blood. Ryan had him pinned with weight and hands, Jeremy’s hair gripped achingly tight through the freshly dyed green as Ryan lapped at his throat possessively. Jeremy’s hands felt the welts and valleys he had made over Ryan's back, smoothing them softly, the beading blood making his hands sticky. He groaned happily underneath the gent who returned it with his own deep rumble.

“I love the way you taste. Your mine to lick however long I want.” Ryan murmured into his skin and Jeremy hummed an agreement.

“So that’s what I am huh? A paddle pop?” he asked, throat once again rough. Perhaps he should bring up with Ryan to lay off the choking for a bit. He didn’t want to permanently damage his voice after all. But now wasn’t the time, Ryan chuckling at his neck.

“Whatever you are Lil’J,” Ryan sat up a little, moving his weight onto his elbows so he could look into Jeremy’s eye’s, matching swelling on both their faces, “Is mine. All mine. Understand?” Jeremy nodded, smiling but sincere.

“Yours.” He said and felt Ryan tremble at the word. Then Ryan was rolling off him, both of them groaning as they came apart, skin sticking together from the mess they had made. Ryan fell beside him and Jeremy turned his head to look at the gents profile.

“What? No clean up this time?” he asked and Ryan smiled, shaking his head still staring at the ceiling.

“Whole bed’s fucked anyway. Alex’s gonna freak if I can’t get the stains out.” they both chuckled softly at that then Jeremy sighed. He rolled onto his side with a pained noise, his muscles objecting after the beating they had taken followed by the harsh fuck. He ignore them, pulling a pillow under his head and shutting his eyes as an arm was put on Ryan’s stomach.

“That was awesome.” He breathed and Ryan finally looked to the lad who seemed as if he was about to doze off.

“I feel like there was a But unsaid there.” He pointed out and Jeremy grinned, not opening his eyes.

“No but, but my butt.” He said and Ryan chuckled. With a sigh he poked Jeremy, making the objecting lad sit up with him.

“Come on, we got to clean up or we’re going to regret it later. Trust me, these are going to hurt worse with time.” He gestured down at the row of knuckle imprints down Jeremy’s abbs, the finger grips outlined in bruises across his hips. He herded Jeremy out of the room and into the shower, the water tinging pink as the two killers washed. Had his jaw not felt so loose or his chest muscles suspiciously tight, Jeremy might have stirred Ryan up again just have him take him in the shower. Another time perhaps.

The golden glow had subsided from his kill of the girl, Ryan once again finding him his place in this world. Jeremy could see what other’s couldn’t, could take what rightfully shouldn’t be possible to steal. Life force bubbled under his skin, filling him with a power that begged him to use it.

But as long as Ryan was there, he could keep in control.  Ryan owned Jeremy completely and as long as that was true Jeremy could hold on to his sanity.

 

In a way Ryan was happy Geoff had put him down. The throb of power had been overflowing from him lately, Geoff’s reassuring reminder that he was in charge, clearing Ryan’s head for him. Every since he had found a kindred killer in Jeremy, Ryan had discovered a new high. Teaching.

Showing Jeremy how to play people, their music so sweet in his ears as Jeremy coaxed it from their bodies. And Jeremy was a great student. He was respectful but bold, curious and his instincts were raw but spot on. He took to the art like a duck to water and Ryan was proud of the process made in such a short time.

There was more that Jeremy gave him then his long held desire to have someone appreciate his work. He gave him a playmate that would not break at the first touch. Always the rush of a kill brought with it restless energy. Of course some of that energy could be pushed into sex but before Jeremy, Ryan had trouble keeping someone more than once even if they survived.

He knew once upon a time, he had regular partners, people happy to tumble into bed with him. But his blurry year as a monster, killing his way through until he was tamed here in los Santos, had changed him. He had forgotten how to touch someone without some sort of pain.

Now he had Lil’J both willing and able to receive his punishment, even return some back to him. Having those eager hands touch him, hands that had maimed, had killed. Someone who came back after every hit, grinning, eye’s as mad and wild as his own. Spreading him down on his bed an knowing, knowing that he, Ryan, owned such a dangerously dark murderer, was the highest rush of all.

So yeah, in a way Ryan was thrilled Geoff had kept them home.

“You tell them your mine.” Ryan ordered from the couch where he was catching up on game of throne’s. Jeremy had his phone out, about to call his friends but he turned to look at Ryan.

“What? You want me to tell them about us?” he asked and Ryan shrugged.

“If you want to tell them about Edgar whatever, say what you want,” he said offhandedly then he looked up to Jeremy with the mad eyes of the King, “But you tell them that you belong to me now.” Jeremy swallowed, wincing at the pain of his bruised throat. He came back over to the couch, Ryan pausing his show as Jeremy settled onto his lap, knees to either side of his hips.

“So this,” he pointed between them, the other hand falling on Ryan’s shoulder, with phone still clutch in it, “this is dating? You want to be a couple?” he asked and Ryan shrugged again, one hand on Jeremy’s hip, the other tracing the shape of his fingers on Jeremy’s throat.

“Call it whatever you want. I don’t care. But you are mine. I told you that right after your first kill remember?” Jeremy did, vividly. Ryan chuckled, seeing confirmation in Jeremy’s face and continuing.

“I claimed you. So make sure you tell your friends. Because if I spot anyone, anyone touching you, I’ll fucking tear their throats out.” He said it mildly, like it was nothing but Jeremy knew he was telling the truth. He frowned, flattered but not sure if he liked this.

“hey, what happened to the whatever the fuck we want rule?” he asked referring to the fact, the lads and gents had no boundaries with each other. Ryan fingers flexed against his throat and Ryan murmured quietly.

“Your mine. If they want you, they can check with me.” Ok now Jeremy was irritated, leaning back, putting distance between them.

“So what I don’t get a say?”

“No.” Ryan said simply. Jeremy got up, Ryan letting him go an amused smirk on his face, sensing Jeremy’s fighting spirit rising up.

“Fuck that Ryan. I didn’t agree to this.” He said pointing a finger at the dangerous man relaxed on the couch.

“Oh but you did. Begged me in fact. It’s not my fault you didn’t read the fine print.” Jeremy shook his head, his voice strong even if raspy.

“I got a say in this you fucker.” He said bristled up and Ryan waved a lazy hand.

“Of course you do.” He said and Jeremy deflated before him.

“But you just...” he trailed off confused and Ryan chuckled.

“Jeremy. Here’s your choice. Walk away.” He made a little shoeing motion and Jeremy looked down at him quizzically, “Be free. Go to your room, never return to mine. It’s be as it was before you started watching me.” Jeremy looked put out and Ryan adored those puppy dog eyes that he gave as the gents words sunk in. Reluctantly the words spilled out of him and Ryan knew Jeremy would never do such a thing as walk away from him.

“What’s my other option.” He asked and Ryan stood up, that predator walk coming towards him, his face that of a kind understanding man, his voice more hypnotic than Gavin's in this moment.

“Stay. Dance with me. Be my lover, my partner. Be my prince and I’ll give you the keys to the kingdom.” He enfolded his long fingers over Jeremy’s hand, pulling him into Ryan’s chest, parodying lovers dancing.

“Be mine. Let me own you, use you as my puppet. You will still be Lil’J, one of the Lads. Still monster truck, sniper and infiltrator. You’ll still answer too Geoff, be a part of the crew, have friends.” the other hand now wrapped around Jeremy’s that held his phone, reminding him of the call he had to make. Ryan brought their hands up between their chests, gazing down at Jeremy with intensity radiating from his glowing blue eyes.

“All I demand is that you belong to me. No one is to touch you in anything more than friendship without my permission. That you come to me, ask me if you want someone else. Is that so bad to ask?” Jeremy jerked a shoulder in an attempt at a shrug, captivated by the dangerous creature he was bedding who spoke so reasonably, outlining it so logically.

“Guess not. I mean other couples just stick to each other too right?” he asked hesitantly, and Ryan rewarded him with their softest kiss yet. He didn’t even nip at the scabs.

“That’s right. Just you and me.” Ryan breathed onto Jeremy’s lips, a promise and a threat all rolled into one.

 

In a way, Geoff was glad to be enforcing a break. Everyone could sometimes get so wrapped up in there things that they forget the wider family. It was great to sit on the couch all together, watching some stupid horror movie. There weren’t enough moments like this, with the six of them and even though he knew it was best for Alex he did feel the empty spot against his side where his second would normally sit.

Gavin was laying on his back, head in Geoff’s lap, head cocked towards the TV as Geoff absently stroked his head. Michael sat with Gavin's legs over his knee’s a drink in hand and texting, a small smile on his face that brought an answering grin to Geoff. He noticed Michael noticing Lindsay and thought he would do what he can to encourage the two. They would make a powerful couple.

That thought turned his eye to Ryan and Jeremy. Jeremy was also laying down, a bit tenderly, his face a mask of bruising and his throat raw. His head was pooled in Ryan’s lap, the gent sitting with his legs up on the couch so Jeremy was framed by his legs, holding one tight, a thigh his pillow. Ryan's face was also pretty nasty and Geoff had lost his shit when he saw the two. He didn’t mind them fucking but they were never to injury each other so badly again. Ryan had three broken fingers for fucks sake and Jeremy’s back needed stitched.

Geoff shook his head, scoffing to himself in half irritation and half love. They drove him up the wall but he really loved all these crazy motherfuckers. They could rape, torture and murder all they wished as long as they came home to him in the end. He had started this crew with a goal in mind. To become the biggest, baddest crew boss there is and own every inch of the city he called home. He’d be powerful then for anyone to dare touch him.

He’d found something else however when he pulled this team together. A family of men as Broken as he was. A bunch of lonely misfits with the skills he wanted and the loyalty and love he needed even if he hadn’t known about it at the time. Sitting here, just relaxing with the crew, knowing they all loved him and were loved...

So yeah, in a way he was glad he ordered holidays...

He couldn’t wait until Alex was back though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so the plot will be moving forward again soon. yet another exzample of the story telling me what's up, i wasn't going to have michael and lindsay together as cannon but it snuck itself in there anyway stupid true love lol ;) jks no it's fine i'll roll with it  
> Hope you enjoyed and thank you too my new commentors and old  
> as always kudos and comment if you like, any sudgestions or something you'd like to see hit me up, i'm always open to ideas :)  
> see you next chapter!


	14. Four tallies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's day four into the holiday and things are getting a little less relaxing and a bit more tense.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK shit is starting up!  
> We got a car chase, we got some angst and some fluff  
> We got the B team coming around and we got jeremy ducking explanations.  
> I really like this chapter but more because it leads into the next which need to the next and AHHH just so excited to see how you guys enjoy/like where this is going! more people then i thought seem to be enjoying this so thank you so much for commenting! i try to answer each one and it fuels my inspiration to write for you gus!  
> So enjoy or not it's up to you but here's the next chapter!

It was a standard job. Geoff just finished his meet with Funhaus, taking Michael and Ryan with him, leaving Gavin and Jeremy at home. Both of the Lads had orders to stay inside, Jeremy still under house arrest and Gavin had a panic button that went straight to Geoff’s phone. Not that he would need it. Just in case.

Jeremy had been alot less edgy after four days stuck in the house with Ryan.

So Michael had been driving when the first shot made a crack against the armour plating of the Kuruma. Immediately, Michael yanked the wheel hard to the left, spinning the car to the side and tapping the brakes to skid, lining up with an alley. He hit the accelerator and another lot of bullets tinged against their spoiler as he gunned it into the alley.

“Who the fucks shooting at us?!” Geoff was shouting, three black unmarked cars following them into the alley. Ryan, his glinting in his mask, calmly reached under the back seat pulling forth his Combat mg, handing forward the bag of stickies into the front seat.

“dead men Geoff. Dead men are shooting at us.” He said happily as the bag was taken from his hands and he could unwind his window to start firing back. Michael drove erratically, jaw clenched as he tried to shake their tail. Made more complicated by the fact that due to the sheer amount of bullets being exchanged and the explosions from the stickies, the police had been called to deal with the civilian casualties.

“Just fucking die!” Geoff shouted, throwing another bomb, this one hitting and sticking to the front of their mystery shooters. They all crowed in victory when the black car was launched into orbit and the second tail peeled away quickly, some of the police chase following. The third tried to follow but Ryan managed to snag the driver and the car careened into a police vehicle. Now with only the cops to deal with, Geoff hit the special Gps Gavin had installed in their main cars and groaned as the police chatter filled up the screen.

“Four stars? Seriously?” he moaned. Michael glanced at the scanner and grunted, turning into oncoming traffic, scaring cars into crashing, hopefully clogging the road behind him for the cops to navigate.

“That must have been those assholes plan. Coming at us with only three fucking cars.” Michael said and smacked the wheel.

“Get those heli’s off my ass Ryan!” he roared and Ryan yelled back.

“I’m working on it!”

They left chaos behind them, Michael jumping onto the highway to get some speed and give Ryan a clearer shot at the helicopters as Geoff painted the road behind them in destruction with his stickies, cop cars and civilian cars being caught together in one beautiful explosion after another.

“I’m out.” Geoff said shoving the empty bag to his feet and Ryan handing him the Assault SMG. Road blocks were being thrown up so Michael had to skip off the highway, landing in the twisting underpasses dodging support beams and homeless people alike before shooting back out into traffic.

“Gonna try for the train tracks!” he called and swore hard when his window shattered from bullet fire, glass shredding his sleeve and cutting into his arm. Geoff growled and shot at the offending chopper as it swung around for another pass, whooping as it went down. Four more took its place, Ryan already laid waste to three by himself.

“Alright, fuck this! Michael, you got your Mini?”

“yeah in the fucking trunk, fat lot of good that does us!” Michael called back and Geoff caught on quicker then Michael, groaning and pinching the bridge of his nose with stress.

“Ryan no.” He said and Ryan’s leering skull came between them, the grin he wore echoed by his alter ego.

“Ryan yes.” He said and turned from his boss too Michael.

“Stop the car in cover, let’s unload on these assholes.” Michael grinned savagely nodding.

“Alright, now that sounds like a fucking awesome plan.” He said and started looking for a spot for their stand. Ryan turned to Geoff, pulling up his mask briefly, his harlequinesque face paint equally disturbing but the sentiment was there.

“permission to break my murder break boss?” he asked and Geoff gave a reluctant ok. Michael swung into an Alley, turning so the Kuruma blocked off behind them, barely enough room to pop the trunk and get out their weapons.

They threw on their body armour quickly then Michael lovingly pulled forth his minigun, rubbing along the barrel softly before he grasped it properly, the familiar weight falling against his thighs. Ryan grabbed his Homing rocket launcher, mask back on and stalked forward to get a clear shot at the choppers, vans and cars bearing down on them. Geoff had his Assault rifle against his shoulder, ready to defend his two idiots if anyone got close but from the madness shining forth from the heavy hitters...No one was going too.

It became a warzone very quickly, the GPS inside the car shooting up to five stars as Michael and Ryan decimated the majority of the Los Santos police department. Michael concentrated on spraying the choppers, roaring out his rage as one chopper stuttered and fell from the sky, slamming into another, both landing into the side of a low building, crushing the side in. Ryan was laughing maniacally, rocket after rocket slammed into the launcher, spiralling off into the oncoming Vans and cars, explosions a chain reaction, men screaming and the smell of burning flesh and metal wafted over. After six choppers, twelve swat vans and eighteen police vehicles were torn and blown to shreds, the police decided to back off before they became an extinct species.

They quickly packed away the weapons, taking advantage of the clear to jump back in and take off towards the subway, laying low until their level went down and police assumed they left the area. Which they did, following the train tracks out towards sandy shores, planning on coming back in the dead of night. As Ryan and Michael dissected their massacre, Geoff put a finger in one ear and called Jeremy with a long suffering sigh.

 

“Oh, minging ‘ell, shove Lil’J!” Gavin ran into the front room where Jeremy was playing some online multiplayer Halo, jumping over the back of the couch, landing next to Jeremy who hissed in pain as Gavin's knocking into him set the four stitched tallies on his back to burning. The brit ignored his objections, snatching up the TV remote and flicking over channels until he hit Weasel news.

The screen flashed with the FAKEAH Kuruma centre screen, three unmarked black car’s following behind and the streets bubbling over with cops. Missed bombs blew up the streets, gunfire flashed from the Kuruma and the following cars until suddenly one of the chasers became a crater. They watched as one car got away, another succumbing to presumably gunfire, their comrades attempting to shake the cops.

Shoulder ache forgotten, Jeremy let the Xbox remote fall from his fingers and shoved Gavin's arm.

“turn it up! Turn it up!” he said urgently and Gavin fiddled with the remote before mashing the correct button, the new reporter voice over coming in clear.

-...Kuruma known to authorities as a vehicle belonging to one Michael ‘Mogar’ Jones. Unknown if Jones is behind the wheel at this time, the police are attempting to blockade before this chase gets out of control.-

Along the bottom of the screen the teleprompter was spitting out statistics of the FAKEAH crew and attempting to keep up with affected roads, the car going too fast and switching erratically to make a voice over report useless. Gavin whimpered as the car hit a sider and became airborne, landing on two wheels then back to four, fishtailing. Jeremy put an arm over the brit, pulling him into his chest, Ryan and his rules be damned.

“They’re gonna be fine Gav.” He said, trying to comfort Gavin even though his own heart was beating hard. They’ve been in worse scraps, worse odds and been fine; he didn’t know why he felt like he was drowning in worry. They would be fine, Ryan would be having the time of his life.

He sucked in a shocked breath but Gavin made no mention, watching intently as the car got further and further away from the news chopper as the report told their viewers they were ordered out of the airspace. Jeremy realised what was wrong.

Ryan could die and he, Jeremy, would be cast adrift among the new urges that coursed through his body. Ever since he had absorbed the light, he had wanted more, his dark self beginning to whisper stronger with each feed. Only Ryan’s voice drowned it out, only Ryan's touch grounded him. If Ryan were gone, he would devolve into something similar to what Ryan had become.

“They’re gonna be fine.” Jeremy said again, rubbing Gavin's arm as Gavin tucked his head into Jeremy’s chest, remote clutched tight as they listened and saw flashes of their family through buildings. Then things got interesting again when they got onto the highway, carnage following the car’s wake, cops ducking around wreckage.

“That’s my boi!” Gavin crowed as Michael disappeared for a time under the underpass maze, “He’s taking them on a chase, that’s the way to the subway isn’t it?” Jeremy nodded, hope flaring hard and bright, chasing away the senseless worry he had held. Of course they were going to get away. They always did.

“Hang on a tick, where’s he going?” Gavin asked as the Kuruma made an unexpected turn. Jeremy cast an eye over the area it disappeared into and realised what was up a moment before two dark figures strode into the alley mouth holding weapons.

“Those crazy motherfuckers!” he scoffed and started to laugh, “God Geoff must be all kinds of proud and furious!” Gavin started to laugh too as the News helicopter backed right off, the reporter screaming as the airspace became filled with shrapnel and fire, whirring blades without the attached compartment flying by the footage before it suddenly dipped into static.

The two men stopped breathing for a few moments as the news desperately tried to figure out what was happening, humour vanishing as they understood they’re three vulnerable brothers were facing down a god dam army. Gavin flinched into Jeremy when there was a rap at the door. Jeremy snapped his eyes from the screen to the door and back.

“Fuck.” He cursed and untangled himself from Gavin, getting up and grabbing the revolver from the bookshelf as he passed, hiding it behind his back. He peered through the eye piece he let out another soft curse, throwing the door wide to admit B team buddies, Trevor and Matt.

“Sorry guys, slipped my mind, Geoff and Crazy, Mad are on the News.” He threw over his shoulder, heading back to the couch and Gavin. Neither of the two main crew noticed the fleeting look of dread on the two newcomers faces as they took in Jeremy.

Faded to yellow but still clear were finger marks around his neck, a darker line under them indicating a rope or cord of some kind. His eye still was dark under one lid and his lip had twin splits in it. When he sat, they both recognised the tender way he settled his weight and shared a quick panicked look before they schooled they’re expressions into poker faces.

Matt came forward first, settling on the other side of Gavin who had leant back into the couch, Jeremy’s arm around him once more. He asked what had happened and Gavin started to fill him in as Trevor sat alone on the other side of the corner couch, trying to be subtle as he studied Jeremy’s profile. Focus was back on the set as the feed was swapped back to the studio, an anchor reporting that visual had been lost on the Kuruma, the FAKEAH presumed escaped.

“Thank fuck for that.” Matt said and Gavin mouthed a curse and a thank you all in one, putting his head in his hands briefly then laughing. Jeremy shifted quickly as his phone begun to peal, jumping to his feet after announcing it was Geoff and heading into the kitchen for a little privacy. Trevor saw the blood stain around Jeremy’s shoulder blade and he felt his heart turn to ice.

“Hey gav,” he interrupted the two men; the British man going through the play by play of the car chase matt had missed for him. Gavin looked to him and Trevor shot a quick glance at Jeremy then back to Gavin, speaking low, “What’s up with Jeremy? Job gone bad or something?” he asked and Gavin looked confused for a second, looking between the sniper who had his back turned, talking in the kitchen and the tall expert forger on the couch.

“What... Oh you mean the war wounds? Oh he and Rye went a few round the other day.” He brushed him off, trying to get back to the chare chase details but finding Matt was looking at him expectantly too. Gavin flicked his arms helplessly, “What?”

“What were they fighting about?” matt asked softly and Gavin chuckled, now waving his arms in negative.

“No, no. Not fighting. Your know their together right?” they both nodded and Gavin shrugged like that was the end of it, “There you go. That’s why he’s a bit marked up. Nothing to worry about. Now you guys missed it but they blew it one of the black cars sky high! We thought it was gonna hit the chopper!” he started back in on the chase details, matt keeping Gavin's attention by making all the right noises at the right moments as Trevor got up and came into the kitchen unsatisfied with Gavin's explanation.

“Yeah, I swear I’m fine here. No, I’m ok Geoff. Gah, you sound like a grumpy old dad! I promise, we aren’t going to throw any parties or break the good china mum I swear. Ok, I will send them home before we turn in.” Jeremy noticed Trevor’s shadow and turned towards him holding up a finger as he kept talking.

“Yeah alright. Alright already! Just glad you’re safe. Ok, enjoy the road trip.” He chuckled and smiled at something Geoff said, “Well we’re all your psychos Geoff and you love us. Alright, bye.” He hung up and turned to Trevor, slipping his phone in his pocket.

“Hey man. Sorry about the screw around but you know how it is.” He said and they hugged, Trevor taking the chance to feel over Jeremy’s back, hands trying to investigate the shoulder but Jeremy pushed him back lightly, hands holding his elbows before letting go.

“Whoa, what you doing there Trevor?” he asked with a confused grin. Trevor sighed and looked to Matt who met his eyes over the couch and nodded, drawing Gavin into a game of halo. Trevor grabbed Jeremy’s hand and tilted a head at the hall.

“Can we talk in your room?” he asked and Jeremy considered him carefully before nodding.

“Sure man.” The two headed to Jeremy’s room attached at the hand, Trevor feeling the familiar calluses of Jeremy’s hand in his own, feeling a bit better now he was finally going to get his answers. Jeremy led him to the room, letting go of his hand once inside and gesturing for him to have a seat.

The dread was back when Jeremy left the door askew and opted to stay standing, not sitting with Trevor like his friend expected.

“Alright, so what’s up?” Jeremy said, giving Trevor his opening.

“You are. Or rather, something’s up with you and I want to know what.” Jeremy shrugged a broad shoulder, eyes tightening just a little defensively.

“I don’t what you mean. I’ve just been busy is all.” Trevor shook his head, feeling the opportunity slipping by.

“No Jeremy, that’s not it. Your acting different, erratic. You got all shitty for the longest time then all of a sudden you’re gone, we hardly hear from you. And when we do, it’s to hear your shacking up with one of the most unhinged guys I’ve ever met, in our long history of meeting unhinged people.” Jeremy spread his hands, moving them to his pockets.

“What can I say Trevor? I was going through a rough patch alright? Things were getting on my nerves.”

“Since when couldn’t you come to matt or I about it?” Trevor stood up as he spoke, striding towards Jeremy, trying to capture his face in his hands but Jeremy avoided the touch, sliding out from under his grasp and moving to the bed before turning around.

“You guys couldn’t help. I didn’t want to get you involved.”

“Involved in what Jeremy?! What’s so bad you can’t tell your best friends?” Trevor spoke low and full of desperation, his friend slipping away from him even as they stood steps apart.

“Don’t worry about it.” Jeremy said quickly that Brooklyn accent sneaking in, once upon a time would have made Trevor chuckle but not today.

“Jeremy, your banged up. Gavin told us it was Ryan.” A flash of rage crossed Jeremy’s happy go lucky features, more terrifying to Trevor then any injury he was displaying.

“Gavin should shut his mouth.” Jeremy muttered darkly then met Trevor’s eyes, “Yeah, Ryan did this. But you should see him! I gave as good as I got Trey, it was consensual.”

Trevor’s temper flared and he took another step towards Jeremy, hand jerking up to gesture at his neck, disgust in his voice.

“That was consensual? He put his hand on you like that and you expect us to just let it go? And why’s your back bleeding huh? More consent?” Now Jeremy was angry, stepping up to be toe to toe, managing to look intimidating despite the stature difference as the two friend glared at each other.

“It’s none of your business what I do with members of my crew Trevor.” He said slowly and menacingly but Trevor drew courage from the concern he felt for his changing friend.

“We are crew too Jeremy. And we were your crew first.” Jeremy jerked back as if hit and Trevor softened, extending a hand.

“Jeremy, we love you. Please man. Tell me what’s wrong. Tell me how to help you and you know I’ll be there. Matt too.” Jeremy shook his head, running a hand through his coloured strip and flopping to sit on the bed. Trevor watched him turn something over in his mind and took advantage of the silence to sit next to him, taking one of those large hands in both of his, pulling it into his lap and stroking the digits.

“We’re your family Jeremy, remember? Us three against the world. Now we said it then and I’ll say it now, we love FAKEAH and we are so proud of you for making Main six. But we’re worried about you man. We just want to make sure your happy here.” Jeremy nodded and looked up with a soft smile, putting a hand over Trevor’s.

“I know. Look, I’m not ready to tell you everything yet alright? No let me finish, “ he said pulling a hand free to manually close Trevor’s mouth for him, “I will ok? Once I’ve figured out for myself what it all means. Until then, it’s just not safe for you guys to be alone with me.”

“but why,” Trevor forced out and Jeremy sighed again with a shrug, now pulling both hands away from Trevor.

“It just is ok? Now you said it. We’re family. So please just trust me ok? I know what I’m doing.” It was so hard for Trevor to swallow the words he wanted to say, grounding out instead, “What about Vagabond hurting you?” Jeremy chuckled and traced a bruise on the inside of his wrist, eyes meeting Trevor’s once more.

“I’m happy with him Trevor. Like really happy. He makes me feel things I... I can’t explain. So please, stop worrying about me. You’re as bad as Geoff sometimes. I’m a big boy, I can tie my own shoelaces and everything.” he joked, Trevor smiling because he didn’t know what else to do. Jeremy had asked him to drop it, had insisted he was happy but Trevor wasn’t buying it.

Wether Lil’J wanted his help or not, he was going to get it.

Now Trevor just had to figure out how.

 

Matt lay in bed, staring at the ceiling after a night full of games, food and booze. Trevor drunk something horrible, Gavin just as bad but Jeremy and Matt had kept it light. Probably both looking out for their boys. The thought made his eyes prickle uncomfortably.

Jeremy was supposed to be their boy. Trevor had gotten blind before he could report fully on the conversation he had with Jeremy, but Matt assumed it hadn’t gone well by the context clues even before Trevor had broken down in the car. All night, Trevor had been quiet and aggressive, his jokes having a desperate edge to them, a sort of devil may care attitude that they all put up with. Gavin shot a few strange looks around the room, feeling the tension but there was a mutual silent agreement to ignore the elephant in the room.

Jeremy had hugged Matt hard when it was time to go, apologizing for having to shoo them out but under orders. Matt had hugged him back just as hard, feeling the comfortable strength of Jeremy enfold him, the man’s warm breath on his neck and he had unabashedly pressed his nose into Jeremy’s skin, taking a deep breath of his scent.

Their goodbye had an air of finality too it that made Matt sniffle the whole way home, Trevor curled in the front sobbing drunkenly. It was up to the shaggy thief too help Trevor out, his friend moaning something about losing Jeremy, the words blurring into gibberish. He managed to get Trevor into his own bed, the tall handsome forger hugging his pillow to him and crying himself to sleep.

Matt wiped his eyes and gave a clearing sniffle.

“Right fuck this.” He said and rolled out of bed. He changed into his light, tighter darker outfit, tucking his hair into a black beanie and clipping on his tool belt. He left two tablets and a glass of water next to Trevor’s bed, relieved to see his friend was sleeping, a notebook now clutched in his hands like a safety blanket.

Matt walked the city, hands in his pockets, just aimlessly wandering. He ended up at the strip club and with a shrug, went in. The lights were dim and the girls we’re hot and barely clothed centre stage. Just the way the pickpocket liked it. Big dumb men, drunk and distracted, huge wads of cash on their person.

Matt left just under an hour, unable to fit anymore bills into pockets. As he walked away he started shedding the cash, bills floating off into the streets. As he made it rain before him, feet crunching down on the money blown on nothing, Matt wished his own problems were as easy to make disappear.

He had missed Jeremy when he had been bumped up to main crew but for a time Jeremy stayed living with them so there wasn’t much difference. Then he moved into the share house to be more assessable to Geoff, keeping his room at their place for days off. Those days off had gotten further and further apart. Then when he was home he became irritable and grouchy, slouching around the house muttering.

They tried to find out what was bugging him but with a frustrated air one day he had snapped at them.

“I don’t know alright?! If I knew I would do something about it! You think I like this? It stinks. Nothing is fun anymore, nothing means anything!” and with that outburst he had run out, driving away leaving Trevor and Matt alone to wonder what more they could have said or done different. He disappeared for a bit, passing them occasionally at work, greeting them friendly but no personal contact. Then he was back again, visiting them and hanging out, good old Jeremy.

Odd Jeremy but still, things had been almost normal so Matt had asked for a favour, something way over kill but something that had them talking again. Matt had been overjoyed to see his plot had worked, Jeremy asleep in the back of their van, reminding him of a million robberies they had done before.

Now again something was wrong. When Trevor woke up, matt was going to grill him for his info. They needed to decide what to do and where they’re loyalty ultimately lay. With the crew or with each other?

Matt broke into house’s, stealing the most expensive item he could carry, dumping it a few blocks away and breaking into the next. Six houses, a security alarm and a police chase later, Matt still didn’t have an answer. He loved Trevor and Jeremy but he also loved this crew. If Trevor and Jeremy were his brothers, FAKEAH had become their family.

What do you when your family is hurting one of its own?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok who the hell were those guys? Is team crazy mad badasses or what? I couldn't stop gavin and jeremy snuggles even though it defied Ryans new rules don't look at me i tried to warn them but at least jeremy keep the line with trevor right?  
> right?  
> Mahaha stay tuned comments and kudos make my day but it's your choice :)  
> let me know what you think, sudgestions and guess are!  
> Can confirm a dream team flashback coming up in a few  
> See you next chapter!


	15. Holidays halt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So it's been a mostly pleasant few days, had some fun, had some snuggles, destroyed the police department... but life as one of the more powerful Crews in Los Santos means you don't get much time without something happeneing to spoil the mood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK i know i really JUST posted but i couldn't resist lol I need to know what you think!  
> So cannon style mahem ahead, no torture or anything just good old gun and knife :)  
> ENJOY!

Geoff and Ryan were seated up on the roof, legs hanging over the edge, a drink in Geoff’s hand, diet coke in Ryan’s. Crazy sons of bitches didn’t even have parachutes. They were discussing the success the holiday seemed to be having. Geoff let Ryan know that Alex was having a relaxing time away and they reminisced over the days when it had just been the three of them.

Geoff’s phone rung, and Ryan eyed him curiously when he answered it and pinched the bridge of his nose sighing. Ryan couldn’t help but hear Geoff side of the conversation but he tried to concentrate of the police helicopters in the city, presumably some sort of chase was on.

“Ah ha. Ah ha. Isn’t that why I put you in charge? Who? Well why don’t you...” Ryan tore his eyes from the skyline, the random car chase forgotten as Geoff looked at him, face serious and voice dropping dangerously.

“He called me what? What’s he look like?” the answer came in and Geoff was scrambling to his feet, half full beer being knocked tumbling over the edge. Ryan came up with him, Geoff gesturing him to follow as he spoke urgently.

“Whose with you? Alright have Mica tail him, Michael takes her place guarding you. Gavin is not to speak to him understand? Yeah I don’t care Lindsay, lock him down now. No don’t engage him, just let him walk around. He’s not to leave though. If he tries fucking stop him then!” Ryan grinned picking up the mood Geoff was in and weighting his chances of a new toy. It had been too long, the car chase had been fun but unless it was up close and personal, he didn’t get the same golden glow with a kill. The elevator wasn’t going to be fast enough for either of them but it was what they had.

“Lindsay no one talks to him until I’m there. I’m on my fucking way. Oh and make sure this stays with crew!” Geoff hung up hard and growled at his phone, running a hand through his hair. The doors opened and Geoff went down the hall first, talking over his shoulder.

“Get Jeremy. Mask up. We’re going to the docks.”

“Yacht?”

“Cage fights set up.” That was all the info Geoff gave as they burst into the penthouse to grab their stuff. Ryan kicked Jeremy's door open and put his head in, his apprentice chilling on his bed, playing his Xbox.

“Ready up, Geoff needs us now.” Jeremy immediately saved his game and got up but Ryan was already gone. Unable to ask, Jeremy slid on his twin shoulder holsters, his favourite purple jacket over the top. He also grabbed his rifle, over his back and his own personal knife at his hip. He grabbed his Stetson, jamming it on his head and meeting Geoff in the lounge, his boss delicately fixing the sleeves on his suit so his tattoos where showing.

“So what’s the go, Joe?” asked Jeremy, bouncing on his heels, happy to be going out again. His shoulder itched where six tallies where carved into his skin but otherwise he was healing up fine. Geoff had yelled at them both for going so hard at each other and Ryan had reluctantly let up on Jeremy’s throat so now it was only a pale yellow.

“Cancel your play date.” Geoff ordered and Jeremy sent a quick text too matt with the slight regret to be cancelling again. Hopefully his two friends will understand he was busy at the cage fights. As understanding when he cancelled on the bomb fire, Geoff forbidding it. They hadn’t been to happy when he had seen them two days ago, not understanding the new relationship between their friend and his dangerous boyfriend. Jeremy had no idea how he was to admit his new obsession, something match darker then stealing or watching people.

He really had to make it up to those guys soon.

Ryan came into the lounge, his makeup applied under his mask, his favourite jacket shrugged over his shoulders and black gloves hiding his broken and splinted fingers. Geoff had also been furious at that, Vagabond could not be seen with visible injuries, the two killers being ordered that if they play rough, no debilitating injuries.

“We’re heading to the docks,” Geoff started, now they were both there heading out towards the elevator as he explained, “Lindsay’s there running the moving bare-knuckle fights. Apparently someone is asking around after me. And if it’s who I think it is, they won’t be alone.”

 

Michael stuck to Lindsay like glue. His eye’s tracked the crowd, people cheering for the current match up inside the cage they had set up. Gavin was playing at referee, Lindsay’s order for him to take over coming after she hung up from Geoff. Gavin was enjoying himself, riling up both fighters and crowd, splitting into part commentator as he danced around the fight staying just out of reach of flashing limbs.

Michael was intimidating a space around Lindsay, taking his job deadly serious as Lindsay herself kept a subtle eye on the man waltzing through the throng, mica following at a distance. The guy was a little out of place, looking more like a laid back weekend dad, his blonde short cropped hair blending into his neatly trimmed beard. He seemed about Geoff's age, had a similar lazy swagger. He wore a soft smile and was chatting softly to anyone who seemed approachable.

Michael nudged Lindsay and nodded to a man just behind mica, a long red beard giving the man a Viking look complemented by a nose ring. He had eyes on mica, the woman assassin having eyes on her mark and not seeing him. Lindsay turned her head slightly, looking as if she was talking to Michael but speaking through her coms too Mica.

“Michaels spotted your very own tail. Congratulations.” She murmured and she watched mica who to her credit didn’t even twitch.

“I’ll get that removed, you got eyes?”

“We got eye’s. Big guy, nose piercing, red beard. Kinda cute. See you soon.” Mica started to sway her way out of the crowd, heading towards where the temporary bathrooms had been set up outside. Lindsay turned her attention to following the blonde guy with her eye’s, Michael whispering in her ear, his coms muted.

“You find him fucking cute huh?” he asked and she smiled without glancing back.

“I like redhead guys, what can I say?” She felt more then saw him smile but she was back on point when Gavin moved the microphone away from his face and activated his own com.

“Geoff coming in now. Looks pissed. No Battle buds.” Lindsay looked to the entrance, Geoff starting his way through the throng, some people giving way as they recognised the FAKEAH crew boss. Michael swore and Lindsay started moving towards Geoff who was coming to meet her.

“The fuck is his guard? He can’t just fucking walk around like this.” Michael was muttering darkly and Lindsay privately agreed. They caught up just in front of the cage, a body slamming into the ground nearby as Gavin crowed for blood.

“Where is he?” Geoff asked straight away and Lindsay pointed to where the blonde guy was now sitting, watching the fight still with that soft smile. Geoff craned his head until he spotted him at roughly the same time the blonde-haired person saw the crew boss. Blondey gave a little wave and Geoff scoffed.

“This place got somewhere private?” He asked of Lindsay who nodded.

“Yeah it’s got an office space we can borrow.” She noted and Geoff tapped his ear.

“What wave you on?” he asked and Lindsay told him, Geoff changing his.

“This is Ramsey, we are shutting this down early, last fight, kick everyone out, new times to be organised later. Clear the docks ASAP.”

There was confirmation coming in from the posted thugs that made up the lowest base of the FAKEAH empire, Gavin announcing a winner and the unpopular decision. Geoff ignored the complaints stabbing a violent finger at the man who stayed in his seat, still watching them calmly.

“Pick that motherfucker up and meet me in the office.” He said and stormed away, Lindsay on his heels as Michael went to grab Geoff’s ‘motherfucker’.

Geoff changed frequency back in time to hear Ryan and Jeremy communicating.

“Ok, I’m clear here. Gonna be a bitch getting that out of the leather though.” Vagabonds deep tone.

“Well I think I pissed off mica.” Said the sniper, voice amused, “Yep, she’s pissed.”

“I’d be careful, that girl is small and deadly.”

“Please, you’re talking to Lil’J rye-bread. Deadliest Shorty there is.”

Geoff cut into the chatter as Lindsay broke into the office door.

“Stop sucking each other off and report!”

“Found a stash car, two guys, one struggled so only bringing in the survivor.” Ryan said straight away, snapping to serious in response to their bosses aggravation.

“Only one support sniper, knocked him cold as per ordered sir. Also Mica was grappled with a big guy, a red bearded giant really and I gave him a little calf shot to make him manageable. Mica is restraining him. Might need a hand dragging him back in.”

“Jeremy, you stay high, the place is emptying, once our people have cleared, shoot anyone coming back in. Use the lackey frequency until it’s confirmed its just main crew.” Lindsay glared at Geoff at the word lackey but let it go as Michael was coming close with a gun pressed to the blondes back. Blonde was still smiling.

“Vagabond, I need you in here, bring your guest and dispatch someone to help Mica drag back her prize. No biting.”

Then Geoff pulled his com piece out as Michael brought in the blonde guy, shoving him towards Geoff. The two older men stared at each other, Geoff poker faced, Blondey still smiling. After a long moment of silence blonde opened his mouth to speak which seemed to be Geoff’s cue to bring a fist smashing into his face. He stumbled back from the blow, Michael putting hard hands on his shoulders and shoving him back to Geoff who grabbed a fist full of the guys shirt collar and clocked him again, turning him and slamming him into the wall hard enough to shake it.

“The fuck are you doing here?!” Geoff roared and Blondey grinned again, panting slightly as blood trickled from the corner of his mouth.

“Is that anyway to greet your commanding officer?” Another thunk of fist on face then Geoff was toe to toe, eye’s glaring into calm grey.

“Fuck you Sarge. Your meant to be fucking dead. Or did you forget that?”

“How can I forget a chest full of rock salt?”

“Better then the buckshot you tried to unload into me, Matt.” The now named Matt started to laugh, putting up his hands in surrender.

“I come in peace from the land of the dead. A warning from beyond the grave for you.” He said softly, another beat of silence, charged with old meaning before Geoff let him go, stepping back and folding his arms. Matt straightened his shirt and wiped his mouth, grimacing at the blood on his hand and doing a quick tooth check.

“Wow you got mean in your old age.” He said lightly but Geoff wasn’t amused. Matt could see that and his eyes passed between Lindsay and Michael before landing on Geoff again.

“You’ve done well for yourself.” He noted and this time Geoff answered.

“If you’ve been keeping up on the news from your little afterlife, you’d know I’m doing better than well. My crew are the talk of this town and these right here are some of my top people.” Matt nodded slowly and there was an interruption as Mica came in, pushing a slimmer black haired man who had his hands behind his head a pistol to his back. Vagabond came in behind, the Viking supported on his shoulder, a gun to Viking’s side, blood pouring from a dark hole in the guys leg. The little office was growing crowded, the two new prisoners were dumped into the corner, Michael and Vagabond standing over them. Lindsay was on Geoff's right hand just behind him, Mica falling into place beside her.

Geoff tipped a head at the two in the corner, the black haired man doing what he can to staunch the blood coming from the Viking.

“Friends of yours?” he asked and matt nodded, smile fading for the first time seeing the bullet hole.

“My other two? They alive?” he asked and Vagabond gave a chilling chuckle which Geoff echoed.

“Your sniper is.” Matt let out a sigh and closed his eyes.

“We came in peace Geoff,” He opened his eyes and looked back to his team sadly, “You didn’t need to kill him.”

Vagabond shrugged, uncaring.

“He tried to shoot me. Too be fair, he’s probably still alive just bleeding out.” He said and the dark haired guy nodded to his boss, confirming the story. Mat sighed out again, looking up briefly.

“Nathan, you stupid fucker, I knew you’d get yourself killed one day.” He murmured then back too Geoff, “You’ve made me regret coming here.” Geoff shrugged, standing by his crewmate’s decision. Ryan wouldn’t have put him down unless he actually had put up a threat.

“I didn’t make you Matt. You chose. You know the risks of this life; it’s why you got me to fake your death.” Matt nodded, shifting so he could lean against a desk, all eyes following that small half step.

“I know. But I’m back now Geoff. Let’s just say, retirement didn’t suit me as well as I thought.”

“What happened to the family life you were chirping about?”

Matt’s unusually kind face turned to ugly in anger and he took a step forward, stabbing a finger at Geoff’s chest. Before he could make contact, Michael was there, shoving him back into the desk and then the wall, his body between his boss and the threat. Geoff put a hand on his shoulder, moving him back as Matt picked himself up.

“Don’t ever fucking mention my family again Geoff.” He growled dangerously, eyes flaring and fists clenched, “Or your guard dog won’t stop me touching you again.” Michael bristled but Geoff waved him down again.

“Enough fucking around Matt. Explain what the fuck you doing here, why you were asking after Griff and who the fuck these assholes are. And while you’re at it, what fucking warning?” Matt grew a little calmer, taking a breath before looking to Geoff, focusing everything he had on the crew boss.

“You know the roosters are rightfully mine. I heard Burns took back over after my ‘death’. That seat is mine, Geoff, and only you and I know I’m still around to claim it.”

“So go fucking claim it. Doesn’t explain while you’re here, fucking around my operations spreading an old name I wish to forget.”

“I need your help. I still got friends in Roosters, Nathan was one of them.” A glare at Vagabond who made no reaction, “but I need your support. In return I’m here to give you some information.”

Gavin walked in, disturbing the charged atmosphere, putting a hand on Geoff’s shoulder, leaning the boss towards him as he whispered something, lips turned away from the strangers. Geoff snapped his fingers at Michael and Mica, sending them out after they came close for a whispered instruction. Gavin pulled his own golden gun, taking Michaels place over their prisoners.

“What help do you want?” Geoff asked Matt as if they hadn’t been disrupted. Matt ignored the mystery, hoping his sniper was still safe.

“Right now, just a promise you’ll stay out of it. If Burns asks you don’t know shit. Give me a chance to get on my feet again.” His face softened and he slowly approached Geoff, showing no hostile intent this time and managing to get his hands on Geoff’s shoulders, stiff under his touch, searching his eyes.

“We were friends once Geoff. When I needed to disappear you were there for me. Be there again and I swear, I will always have your back.” Geoff sighed, melting and clapping matt’s face affectionately.

“You’re a son of a bitch Sarge. I hate you.”

“You love me.” Matt said confidently and Geoff raised a finger between their faces.

“Loved. Past tense. But I’m willing to give you the time and space you need. Especially if it means Burns might be distracted for awhile. Now what’s your info?”

“McCormick.” Geoff stiffened at the name, dropping his hand as Matt stood back.

“What about him? That fuckers dead as dicks.”

“About as dead as I am.” Matt pointed out. Geoff growled and took a step away, thinking, eye’s going around the room, looking at the present members of his crew, mind wandering to the others, all closer then family. If one of them died then he wouldn’t be as calm and as accepting as matt had been with the attack of his man.

“What else you got?” he said harshly pointing back at matt.

“Not much,” the blonde shrugged, “Just that he’s alive, keeping his head down and gathering power. that Burns knows about it and hasn’t told you. McCormick is after the two of you, he wants payback and I think Burns plan was to toss you to him as bait.”

“That mother fucker.” Geoff begun but Matt put up a hand, wanting to continue.

“there’s more Geoff. A little bird told Crackerjacks that you’re the asshole who minced one of their reps in the field. Word is they want to make their money back from his loss of service. I saw some here tonight.”

Geoff swore again, running a hand over his face.

“Did you bring me any good news?” he asked and Matt shrugged and spread his hands.

“I’m alive?”

“That’s not good news and isn’t even news at all.” Geoff pointed out and matt brought back out the soft smile.

“It’s good to see you Geoff. Now that’s all I got but I’ll keep you in the loop? Just I got Adam bleeding all over Brandon’s shirt and I wouldn’t mind trying to save Nathan if it’s not too late.”

Geoff nodded and the two exchanged numbers before both shaking hands firmly. Brandon helped Adam up, struggling to get the bigger guys weight over his shoulder but managing.

“It is good to see you Matt. Even if you bring all sorts of complicated shit with ya.” Geoff noted and matt smiled. He then looked over to Vagabond, face turning serious.

“Patrick? My behind the scenes guy?” he asked and Geoff nodded over his shoulder.

“Alive but gonna have one hell of a headache where you left him.” Matt nodded an acknowledgement to the skull masked mercenary then gave Geoff another parting smile.

“See you around.” He moved and taking the weight from Brandon an issuing instructions to get back to the car and their downed man as soon as possible as they exited the office.

“Vagabond, make sure they leave with their guys.” Geoff ordered and Ryan nodded his masked face, also leaving just behind them. Now it was just Geoff, Lindsay and Gavin left and Lindsay stepped up.

“Ok, so what the fucks going on?” she asked now they had their privacy back. Geoff was still watching the closet door and answered her softly, almost as if he was talking to himself.

“A fuck ton of trouble.”

He shook his head and concentrated on Lindsay who was not impressed to be left out of the loop.

“I’ll fill you in I promise but right now we need to do a sweep and lockdown of all operations and the catch is doing it as quietly as possible. I don’t want anyone outside the main crew and B team knowing anything is up. Get on it then get back to me.” Lindsay opened her mouth to argue but he put up a hand to stop her, “No please linds. Do what I ask then I swear I will fill you in on the details. I’m gonna need your insight.” Lindsay nodded and he smiled at her, pulling her in for a quick hug.

“You’re lucky I don’t smack you down old man for bossing me about like that.” She muttered in his arms and Geoff chuckled, affection for his protégée helping ease the huge load of stress Matt had delivered onto his shoulders. Lindsay left and now Gavin stepped forward at Geoff command.

“Ok, so tell me everything.” Geoff ordered Gavin and the brit huffed out a long sigh, putting his hands in his pockets and beginning to tell Geoff what had happened.

 

Gavin was extremely curious about what was going on inside that office but as senior crew he knew his job was to stay out here, directing their guys into shooing out the remaining crowd and locking down the building. It started out with objections and arguments, violence having Gavin fingering his gun as their people herded the crowd out. Then things calmed down, people forming an orderly exit due to three things.

One, Vagabond and the Ninja pulled two dishevelled and bleeding men towards the office.

Two, Gavin had pulled his gun and shot a man who had attempted to swing at him.

Three, When the first guys friend pulled his own weapon for revenge, half the crowd was painted red from the sniper shot that took the majority of the attackers head.

“That was top Lil’J!” Gavin said over coms, punching the air.

“I do what I can.” Jeremy came back modestly. Gavin grinned and soon he had confirmation that the exits were all shut and secured.

“Ok, now sod off.” Gavin ordered, “Main crew business.”

He looked up towards where the sniper shot had come from and made it obvious he was switching back to the main crew line.

“You’re getting to be a bossy boots gav.” Jeremy noted and Gavin chuckled, lounging against the only entry into the shed.

“A millions dollars, but you have a life boss for a year.”

“A life boss?”

“Yeah, someone who follows you around, orders you when to eat, when to brush your teeth. How to shake your dick off after a piss...” Jeremy chuckled and the two went through a few different scenarios to pass the time.

Then came something strange.

“I got movement gav.” Jeremy said cutting across Gavin's newest question. The brit straightened up, hand falling to his gun, eyes peeled.

“Where?”

“Close to me. Approaching my position. They might be after my post, might not know I’m here. Going silent.” Gavin swallowed nervously, fingering the handle of his gun hearing nothing. He hated standing here, knowing there was someone on Jeremy’s end and unable to do anything about it. But this kinda thing wasn’t his expertise.

“One guy. Can’t make out his face. He found the other sniper.” Jeremy suddenly whispered into Gavin's ears and Gavin paced, waiting for more, not wanting to speak and break Jeremy’s concentration. Then he was ducking into the shed, out of line of fire sight for Jeremy’s nest when he heard Jeremy shout then fall silent.

It felt wrong in his gut to head to the office instead of running too Jeremy’s aid but he needed back up. He took in the scene quickly, ignoring the tension he had broken and strode to Geoff’s side, turning away in case the stranger’s could read lips.

“Jeremy had someone on his position. Heard him shout and hasn’t been on coms since. One minute ago.” He said quickly, seeing Geoff’s eyes tighten just slightly, keeping his poker face. “Relieve Michael.” He ordered and Gavin obediently went to his place as Geoff dispatched Michael and Mica to help Lil’J. Gavin just hoped he made the right choice.

“Lil’J is silent, go check on him, one confirmed asshat, possibly more in sniper position. Stay within line of sight of each other.”

The two nodded and left the office for the entry. Michael pulled out his .50 pistol and nodded to the open door.

“Ladies first.” He said and Mica rolled her eyes at him. She pulled up the black hoodie she wore, tightening it to hide her hair and crept to the entrance. She pressed up just inside the door and took a deep breath before she darted across the open space into the alley formed opposite between two sheds.

“Nothing.” Michael said over coms and she let out the breath she was holding.

“Ok, where was the nest?” she asked and she tried to keep her irritation off her face at Michaels answer.

“The fuck am I meant to know? I was with Lindsay the whole fucking time.”

“Well what the fuck are we doing here then?” she asked back, just as annoyed.

“Fucking Geoff expects us to deal with it so we’ll deal. Now judging by the decorations out here, I’d guess he was that way.” She peeked out to see Michael point to the group of buildings to the left. The bodies on the ground seemed to support that theory as she ran a practised eye over them and started calculating distances.

“Ok, get over here.” She said and Michael scoffed.

“Ya right. I like my head were it fucking is thanks”

“Don’t be a pussy, come on.” Michael swore it was because Lil’J could possibly be in trouble and not the insult that had him legging it across the space. A gunshot rung out, cement chips hitting the back of his ankles.

“Fuck me!” Michael swore, skidding into cover. Mica steadied him to a stop, a slice of her head sticking out as she saw where the shot had come from.

“Got it, you ok?” A firm nod from Michael, “Let’s go.” She was off, Michael on her heels, sticking to cover and working their way towards the sniper nest. Their mysterious sniper left no doubt of their intentions, during a brief moment between cover, bullets tinging around them.

“Are they fucking with us?” Mica asked as she skidded to a halt in cover, the space she was about to break into catching the round meant for her.

“I think they’re warning us away. Fuck that. If they don’t want us to come after Little J then they chose the wrong fucking crew to fuck with.” Michael growled and threw himself across the space, another round just missing his legs.

“They’re incapacitating shots.” Mica realised telling Michael when she caught up and he nodded his head.

“Where the fuck you been for the past ten minutes?” he pointed out and peeked out again. They were closing in on the building, those near misses getting nearer.

“This is taking to fucking long.” Michael muttered no longer doubting his fellow lad was in some sort of trouble. Jeremy would never allow another sniper to set up in his nest, especially one that was obviously hostile.

“M&M, check in.” Lindsay came over the line and Michael filled her in quickly as Mica took the longer gap between the yard over the street and into the buildings.

“Enemy sniper set up in Jeremy’s position. Lil’J still silent. At first I thought they were just fucking bad shots but now we think they were warning us off, going for crippling shots. Still fucking missing but slowed us down.”

“Meetings done, help on its way.”

“Don’t think your gonna be there any faster than us. Watch your exit, so far seems to be the one but can’t confirm.”

Then he was off, darting back and forth, heart and feet pounding. When he skidded into cover next to mica, breath heaving he looked at her shake her head negative to any shots taken at him.

“Fuck,” he cursed breathlessly and then continued on, less wary of being shot now, “Lindsay, sniper has moved, he’s fucking moved!” Michael panted out, the two pushing for speed over stealth now. They arrived in the access alley too the snipers building and took in the scene.

“If he’s there, the unconscious man is to stay alive. Geoff wants the one taking pot-shots alive as well if possible.” Michael and Mica ignored Lindsay for the most part, mica only whispering, “Going silent.” into the coms.

There were signs of a car having been here, taking off at a speed. Michael didn’t want to waste time taking in the tracks, that being Alex’s expertise anyway. They just made sure no one was still around then Michael started swarming up the ladder, Mica coming up behind him.

He paused just before his head poked into view, lifting it carefully, looking around.

He motioned to Mica he couldn’t see anyone and came up a little fuller. There was a roof access door and a few air conditioner units but beside that, the roof was bare of human life. He got off the ladder, gun in hand, moving slowly, checking around and poking in corners. He found an unconscious man laying against a unit, blood leaking from a temple wound.

Then his blood ran cold as behind a air-conditioning unit he found Jeremy, his eyes shut and a pool of blood around him. He dropped to his knee’s by his lad and when mica paused jerked a hand at her.

“Find the fucker!” he ordered and she moved on.

Mica went into the roof access, breaking in the door, seeing if their mystery sniper had fled that way. Michael cursed and holstered his weapon bending down hesitant to touch Jeremy but needing to know. His fingers shook and he made a quick fist to steady them before he pressed his fingers to Jeremy’s neck, the snipers Stetson having rolled off his head, sitting so the blood touched just the rim of it.

“Jeremy’s down, he’s fucking hurt bad, knifed, we need medic!” Michael reported quickly, feeling a sluggish beat against his fingers. Confirmed alive, Michael worked quickly, trying to find where Jeremy was losing blood and finding a deep knife wound in his side. By the looks of his pale face, a nasty lump on his head, Jeremy had lost consciousness via a hit and been left bleeding out so Michael did what he could to stem the flow, tearing off his shirt and pushing hard on the wound.

“Come on Little J. Stay with me man.” He muttered, blinking hard and pulling Jeremy into a better position, hands becoming wet quickly with blood.

“Mick-ol?” a feeble voice said and Michael looked up from where he was pressing to see Jeremy was looking at him blearily.

“Hey man, you’re looking like shit. Don’t worry the guys are on their way. Fix you right up, make you pretty again.” Jeremy’s head rolled weakly and his eyes flickered.

“No, no! Jeremy?! Hey! Stay awake man!” Michael yelled and Jeremy opened his eyes again, mumbling something. Michael didn’t hear it but he kept talking.

“Jeremy? J? Keep talking to me ok? If you fucking bleed out on me I’m going to fucking beat your face in.”

“You could...try...” Jeremy muttered and Michael gave a strangled chuckle.

“Fucker... distraction... Pal knifed... behind...” Jeremy tried to explain and Michael heard a car screech to a stop in the alley, Mica coming back to help him with Jeremy, people pounding up the stairs.

“It’s cool J. Hey? We’re gonna move you alright? Gotta get you to a hospital.” Michael resisted the urge to deck the assassin when she pushed him out of the way, replacing his shirt with bandaging, just talking with Jeremy. The roof was suddenly crowded, crew and a stranger filling up, crew coming to Jeremy, stranger to the other guy. Michael didn’t give a fuck, holding Jeremy’s shoulder with a tight grip.

“Ok, he’s as ready to move as I can make him.” Mica declared and Gavin and Lindsay, Ryan having shoved him out of the way, scooping up their injured sniper, were restraining Michael. Only Lindsay’s voice in his ear stopped Michael from coming after the serial killer who paid him no attention, just hurrying down the steps with his precious load, mica keeping up best she could, trying to keep that solid pressure Jeremy needed.

“Michael, he’s helping! He’ll get him to the car. Geoff’s taking him to the hospital, he’ll be fine.” Michael growled but pulled his arms from his friends, snatching up his jacket and putting it back on his naked torso. His bloodied shirt lay where it had been discarded, a bloody reminder. Michaels eye’s caught on the stranger who was bringing around his friend.

Before anyone could stop him, he had the stranger dangling over the edge of the building, only Michaels grip on his shirt stopping him from falling, the slight dark haired man grabbing desperately at Michaels hands. The unconscious guy had stirred but stayed down, Gavin's golden gun in his face. Lindsay walked over laying a soft hand on Michaels shoulder and addressing the dangling man.

“Talk quick and talk true because I’m not sure how long Michael can hold your weight. Did you double cross us?”

“NO! No, No! Patrick was meant to be our back up! I fucking swear! And he’s been out of it! There was no one else my boss just wanted to talk!” Lindsay tapped Michaels shoulder lightly and with a roar, Michael threw the guy back onto the roof where he lay breathing hard, holding his chest like his heart would burst out of it.

“WELL IF NOT YOU, FUCKING WHO!?” Michael screamed and both guys flinched.

“We don’t know! We just follow Hullum!” The dark haired guy yelled, squirming onto his back and holding up his hands trying to ward off the enraged Michael.

“Michael, we got orders. They’re free to go.” Lindsay said calmly and he turned that rage look on her. She stared him down and he turned his head sharply, fists clenching but a clear submission to her will.

“Get the fuck out of here.” Lindsay told the two calmly and Patrick got up, a little unsteady but Brandon was there, the two scrambling quickly from the roof. Michael gave another roar and slammed a fist into a unit, denting the metal. Gavin exchanged a loaded look with Lindsay and holstered his gun.

They didn’t bother saying anything, just let Michael smash his fist over and over into the unit, metal giving way under the assault. They all had seen Jeremy’s condition and they knew it was bad. He might not make it to the hospital.

 

Jeremy felt light headed, like he was floating away again. The golden light was around him and he could see it getting stronger and stronger with each beat of his heart. It shone around and through him, his aches and pains fading, his emptiness filled, his deep held secrets being washed away. The scared little boy he had once been had been illuminated by the light and Jeremy knew his life was playing for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope that lived up to the hype i really been waiting to post it, and i'm churning out more really excited to see where the story leads me, i may have lost control of the train but i'm enjoying writing it lol  
> Enjoy guys!


	16. Dream of the Dream team

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy's beginings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is how matt trevor and jeremy all met! hope you enjoy!  
> so theres some child abuse ahead, homelessness, tinest little slip of smut (like a paragraph calms down peoples lol) and angst and fluff all over  
> yay i love these boys :)

Jeremy just concentrated on his breathing. In and out, in and out. He was curled up in a dark place, no idea how he got there, but he had a good idea.

His father had hidden him away again.

The last he thing little twelve year old Jeremy remembered was his mothers face flash red as he mumbled he had failed to get into the football team but had tried out for gymnastics. Something flew at his face and everything tipped black. He could hear them now, screaming at each other.

“You produced a runt as scrawny as yourself! My Nancy pansy son to much my Nancy pansy husband!”

“Fuck you! Just because your family are all footballers doesn’t mean I’m any less!” A dull thunk and a yelp.

“You are less you piece of shit! You and the runt! I should have fucking drowned that little bitch when he was born!” he heard his mother yell, the words just sliding into the hole where Jeremy kept all such threats. He hugged his knee’s trying to make himself disappear.

“Then why didn’t you? Would have done us a fucking favour! You’d be in fucking jail, he’d be dead and I’d be free of you both!” Another hit and Jeremy whimpered, a tear sliding down his face. This was a usual accordance in the Dooley household. His mother had married his father for his father’s money, made no secret of it. She hated them both, a muscular and strong woman from a line of strong woman and men, stuck with a short scrawny mans short scrawny kid.

“You know why! That kids our ticket to your stupid fucking fathers money!”

Jeremy knew this. They only had him because his grandfather demanded an heir to his dynasty. A car tycoon, owning a multimillion dollar franchise. His pitiful son wasn't fit to run after him, so he had demanded a grandson. Jeremy had heard about the girl that had come before him, discarded as useless by parents and grandfather. He had no doubt when he was given to his grandfather at fourteen, things would not become easier for him.

The twice a year visits to his grandfathers estate had been erased as much as possible to Jeremy’s memory. Old hands touching him, a grey beard sneering. Useless tears falling into the empty space inside him where love should have been but it held only fear and pain.

“Your mine boy. Understand? Your mine.”

Jeremy learnt to agree and found it was easy to be owned. To just do as he’s told, make no decisions for himself. He had reinforced that lesson to himself tonight. He had hoped a different sport might please his mother, taking it upon himself to sign up. And now they were going to be at each other all night, Jeremy placed in his time out box, hidden from sight so he couldn’t anger them further. He sobbed quietly to himself, wondering dimly if they’d remember to get him out for bed.

 

He jerked awake when the lid opened, flinching away from the face that peered at him. At the same moment the lid opened further, Jeremy realised the face above his wasn’t an angry parent but someone his age.

“What on earth are you doing in there?” a soft voice whispered, eyes a harder brown then his own glinting from the small torch the boy held but somehow seeming kinder than any other expression Jeremy had ever seen directed at himself. He sat up in the box, the boy backing up a little, face turning scared.

“I was in time out.” he whispered back and the boy crept a little closer.

“Time out? why would you be in a box for a time out?” Jeremy shrugged a little self-conscious.

“It’s what I deserve.” He mumbled ashamed. The boy came a little closer, looking into Jeremy’s face understanding there.

“I don’t think so. My parents thought I deserved alot of stuff. But they were wrong so I left.” Jeremy looked at this mysteriously slight boy in wonder. He was dressed in dark worn clothes, his hair long and shaggy, sticking together with filth, face streaked in dirt.

He looked free.

“Matt.” The boy said pointing to himself. Jeremy looked at him for a long moment.

“Jeremy.” He said and extended a hand for a firm handshake like his grandfather had taught him. Matt giggled and took it in both hands, turning off the torch and stashing it in a pocket. He shook it hard and Jeremy grinned at the silliness of it.

“Jeremy, wanna help me rob your parents?” he asked and Jeremy agreed, not letting himself think of the consequences. Together the two boys scoured the impressive pent house looking out over the city of liberty city. Jeremy showed Matt where his parents had stashed all the best jewels and hidden money stash they didn’t think he knew about. The whole time was spent talking long and low about their families, Jeremy sharing his abuse at the hands of his parents, matt relating his own experience with his drug addled family. When matt had a full bag the two boys stopped at the front door, matt putting a hand on Jeremy’s elbow.

He took in the black eye Jeremy was supporting and was reminded of his own home he had fled.

“Come with me.” He begged but Jeremy shook his head, timid.

“I can’t.” He said not able to bare the sympathy in his new friends face, “They’ll look for me.”

“My parents didn’t.”

“But I’m their ticket to grandfathers money. They won’t just let me go.” He started to cry, wanting so bad to leave but knowing the truth. His parents and his grandfather would hunt him down forever. Soft skinny arms wrapped around him and he let himself go into the hollowness of his friend, the bones feeling birdlike brittle under his well feed hands.

“If you ever change your mind, look me up k? Ask for axel around Bohan.” Matt instructed and Jeremy reluctantly let the thief go. Matt disappeared down the hall as Jeremy locked the door behind him. He crawled back into his box, crying all night long to have to do it. If only there was a way for him to disappear.

 

He never forgot Matt, that one long night cementing a bond between the two broken kids stronger then a school based friendship. His mother was slightly pleased when Jeremy filled out around the shoulders and legs, Gymnastics his only option for sport and helping him build up a figure his mother would be proud of. She still beat him and his father for being so short, but at least he no longer fit into the box.

Then came the end of one of his visits with grandfather. As he stood straight, trying to become taller as his parents respectfully wished farewell to the patriarch, those cold eyes turned to him.

“Next time, you’ll be staying Jeremy. We have alot to go over if you are to be a strong man and take over one day.” His voice kind but his eye’s trailing knowingly over the young gymnastics body.

“I can’t wait.”

That first night home, Jeremy took the glock 22 out of his mothers bedside table and shot both his parents dead in their sleep. He took a bag full of clothes, money and items to sell, making his way through the night streets into the suburb of Bohan. Once there he spent three weeks, avoiding police and gang alike, living out of his bag and killing another two men, each one at a time trying to steal Jeremy’s stuff or his dignity. They didn’t know Jeremy didn’t have any dignity left.

One cold night, he was curled around his bag, shivering behind the dumpster next to a bar. He didn’t even hear him approach, the hand touching his shoulder startling Jeremy into drawing his gun, the barrel twisting with the force of his trembles.

The start of a pubescent beard was patched all over the thin face, that long lanky hair covered by a beanie, now glasses sat broken but repaired roughly on the bridge of his nose. The eyes behind the glasses were just as Jeremy remembered however.

“Heard you were looking for axel.” Matt smiled at him and helped him up, shrugging his jacket off and handing it too Jeremy who pulled it thankfully over his shoulders, his muscular arms to big for the sleeves.

Matt took him to his home, nothing more than a hole into the attic of an abandoned building, the two becoming like brothers, Jeremy even joining the gang matt ran with. The two kids became drug runners, dropping off and picking up product, helping learn how to make it and distribute it. Matt was also a valued thief, Jeremy learning the skills but never as naturally good as his tall friend.

Jeremy became known as a tough kid, able to fight and win against older opponents but mostly was known for his steady hand. One of the higher ups took notice of Jeremy coming in everyday to practise with his handguns, taking him and matt as a package deal. Training them both in stealth and infiltration. Jeremy had a natural flare for the dramatic, able to slip in and out of personalities on a whim. He also took to the rifle as one born to it. Matt was happy to stay a thief, too shy to do what Jeremy did.

Which was become a hell of a hit man.

It’s actually how they met Trevor.

Matt had gotten them in the mansion and Jeremy had broken off to head upstairs, his weapon already silenced as he crept up the stairs. The drill was as boring as ever, Matt and Jeremy having been together for years, the eighteen year olds the pride of their little gang. He was amusing himself by pocketing some valuables when hard hands grabbed him, a gun pressed to his head.

He put his hands up, sweat breaking out as a voice whispered fiercely in his ear.

“Make one false move and I’ll blow your brains out.”

“Took the words right out of my mouth.” Jeremy’s voice sounded, matt legs almost giving out from relief as the gun was dropped and he was let go. He darted a few steps away, turning to face his attacker. Jeremy had his gun against the back of their head, catching the dropped weapon with a foot and shoving it away.

The guy was even taller than matt, porcelain skin with dark eyes and hair. He was every inch, tall dark and handsome. His long fingers looked delicate and matt noticed bruising around the guys exposed wrists and a shadow across a perfectly sculpted cheekbone.

“Please, you don’t understand. I’m the guard dog. The guard dog guards.” The fierceness was gone, a tear leaking out of the corner of an eye, hands starting to tremble.

“He will be so angry with me please.” He mumbled shutting his eyes. Jeremy lowered his weapon, tucking it away, meeting Matts eyes briefly before turning the guy around.

“I’m guessing that chain upstairs was for you?” he said softly and the tall guy nodded brokenly. Jeremy lifted a hand slowly, placing it on the shoulder above him.

“Your masters dead man. I just killed him. Come see for yourself.”

They had found a new friend.

Trevor had been in captivity for many years but under the scars and the frail mentality lived a man of great intelligence and worth. He had been used by his master and his friends but he had also been taught things, useful things to do when your locked in a room for hours. He could forge just about any official document, knew how to tell real credits from fake and could hide a bank trail like it never existed.

He also had the same kind of humour as the other two, moving in with them that first night and over time, coming out of the shell fear had made. They became a powerful trio, moving on from their first gang and into a second more powerful one as the liberty city changed hands far above their heads. They worked together, lived together, were family.

 

Jeremy slid from the couch onto the floor with a long drawn out groan that caught Matt’s attention where he was sitting at the table, the computer set up in front of him. They had moved into this tiny one bedroom apartment, the guys used to sleeping in one room but now had some more living space.

“I forget how to human.” Jeremy groaned from the floor, spreadeagled on the old stained carpet that came with the couch.

Matt chuckled and Trevor walked in from the bedroom, his ds in hand. He paused when he saw what matt was chuckling at.

“What’s his problem?” he asked and Matt shook his head, leaning back on the chair with a shrug.

“He forgets how to human apparently.” Trevor laughed as well, pausing his game and placing the Ds on the table, coming over too Jeremy and sitting where Jeremy had slid off. He laughed at the screen when he saw Jeremy had died again, still trying to legendary run Halo two by himself.

“I thought you were a good sniper?” he teased and Jeremy hit his calf with a gentle fist.

“I’m a great sniper thank you very much. Just it’s hard.” He drew out the last word in a whine. Matt rolled his eyes at Trevor who waggled his eyebrows before turning back to the screen. He lifted his long legs and crossed his ankles, placing them on Jeremy who complained but didn’t shift.

“Let a master show you how it’s done.” He said smugly.

Matt wasn’t sure when it had happened but he looked up sometime later to see Jeremy and Trevor’s legs entangled on the couch, their torso’s obscured by the couch backing. He gave as surprised cry and they sat up, lips wet and faces guilty, Jeremy still hovered over Trevor.

“oh! Wow! Guys I’m still here!” he warned them and they came all the way up, adjusting their shirts and avoiding each other’s eyes.

“ah, yeah sorry. Don’t know what came over me.” Trevor said apologetically and Jeremy grinned at him then at matt. Matt and Jeremy had grown into their bodies, living those awquardly teen years, pressed close together for warmth. It was almost natural that they would begin to seek relief and comfort from each other. That had ended when Trevor had joined in their warmth pile.

The tallest of them had been the most timid at first, both the guys understanding and empathising with him. They’re night romps turned to doggy piles of snuggles not wanting to push Trevor into something he didn’t wish to be a part of. By mutual agreement, Jeremy and matt started looking elsewhere for partners, Jeremy a bit more successful since he was more outgoing. Tonight however, the first time in a year of living together, only two months into this new place and Trevor had made the first move, surprising the nineteen year old by pulling him into an unexpected kiss.

“Don’t be sorry Trevor. It’s cool man, we’re all friend here.” Trevor nodded into his hand and sighed, leaning onto his knees, head tilted.

“I just, I don’t know how I feel anymore.” He admitted softly, sounding so small that Jeremy shuffled close again, pulling him into his lap, laying Trevor’s head on his shoulder. Matt pulled his headphones completely off and joined them on the couch, sitting tight to Jeremy’s side, his head leant on the other shoulder and a hand patting his hand down Trevor’s spine.

“I swore I’d never want anyone to touch me again. But you guys, you guys are always so gentle, so soft with me.” He shifted so he could meet Matt’s eyes as he was cradled in Jeremy’s arms.

“I love you guys so much. I can’t define how, but sometimes I just want to be between you both. Know I’m safe you know?” Jeremy tucked his chin over Trevor’s head, rumbling an agreement.

“I felt the same Trevor. I didn’t think it would ever feel good for me. But this one,” He cocked his head at matt who gave a knowing grin, “try cuddling up to that every night when your sixteen and he just keeps squirming against you claiming he’s sleeping.” All three chuckled lightly and Matt spoke up next.

“We are here for you Trevor. No matter what. In any way you need.” Trevor’s eyes filled with water and he reached a hand, fisting against Matt’s shirt.

“Can I sleep between you guys tonight?” he asked and they both readily agreed. Trevor being carried in the short but strong mans arms like a child.

Slowly, Jeremy and Matt, now that they knew Trevor was interested, raged a war of affection upon him. They brought him little gifts, matt’s mostly stolen but the heart was behind it. Jeremy stayed home more, making his bosses a little irritated but he felt helping Trevor past his fear was more important. Little touches, ‘accidently’ brushing past him in the kitchen when there was plenty of room. Driving Trevor mad as they ramped up the teasing until he wanted them as bad as they wanted him.

It all came to ahead one night as they slept on the large mattress on the floor in their bedroom. Trevor was half off the mattress, one leg brushing the floor as he slept hugging a pillow. He dreamt of Jeremy, eye’s smouldering above him, of Matt’s voice in small hums of approval and need. Then he released he wasn’t dreaming anymore, soft pants coming from beside him as the mattress moved in tiny soft tremors.

He opened one eye then closed it almost too a slit. Matt had been beside him tonight, had fallen asleep hugging him but now there was a small space between the two young men. Matt was on his side, hands around the palm that was stifling his small groans over his mouth, the thief’s eyes closed but expression pleasure filled. The blanket was around them but Trevor didn’t need imagination to understand why Jeremy was rocking oh so gently against matt, a hand down matt’s front, disappeared into the sheet and his face pressed to matt’s shoulder.

“Shh, oh matt, Shh we can’t wake him.” Jeremy was whispering softly, voice deep with his own pleasure, “gotta be quiet. You feel so good matt, ugh.” He bit his lip suppressing a groan and Trevor felt a tremor of his own up his spine. He wanted to touch himself as he watched and that was what undid him, the tiniest of breathes escaping and cutting off before he could give the game away.

Jeremy stilled instantly, eyes snapping up to Trevor’s face, who gave in pretending to sleep.

“ah, I’m right here guys.” He said, the joke the first thing coming to mind. Matt’s eyes shot open and Jeremy shifted his hand from matt’s mouth even though neither of them had anything to say. They were busted, well and truly.

Trevor had to shift, his own erection pressed painfully into the mattress before his movement had it strain the front of his boxers. The other two were still quiet, waiting for his reaction.

“um, don’t stop on my account?” he said and started to shuffle from the bed Matt’s voice following him as he got too the door.

“Trevor wait.” He said then there was a small little shuffle as the two came apart with a groan and Matt pulled his boxers back up, Trevor ignoring him and heading out into the lounge room. Matt followed him and stood just behind him when Trevor sat with his face in his hands on the couch.

“Trevor?” he said tenderly and felt his heart break at the little sob Trevor tried to hold back. Matt came around, kneeling before his friend, trying to see his face.

“Trevor, we’re so sorry. We should have gotten out of bed. It just kinda happened. Come on man, we wouldn’t have touched you.”

“I know.” Trevor groaned miserably and leant back, unable to look at the blonde thief with his beard growing in long and his eyes clear without his normal glasses blocking the view.

“I know. I’m so stupid, I’m sorry. Go back to bed, I’ll give you guys time.”

“No man. Why are you stupid?” he asked, hands managing to snub one of Trevor’s, seeing a glimpse of tear streaked face. Trevor mumbled something that matt couldn’t catch.

“Try again?” he suggested with a hint of a grin. Jeremy, also now with boxers on, had come out but was ignored by the two on the couch.

“I thought you guys wanted me.” Trevor repeated dejectedly. Matt sighed and smiled up at his friend, Jeremy coming over and leaning over the back of the couch, hugging Trevor as matt did the same around his waist.

“We do want you silly.” Matt said and Jeremy rumbled his agreement in that deep way of his.

“It’s my fault. You were so cute all wrapped up over your pillow. Matt and I were talking about it, how much we wanted you but don’t want to push you. I kinda started stirring matt up and before we knew it, you busted us.”

Trevor looked to Jeremy’s upside down face, eyes sparkling still with tears.

“You think I’m cute?” he asked and Jeremy nodded as matt slapped a thigh.

“Yes! We do!” matt assured him then leant up fully to kiss Trevor on the lips. Jeremy kissed his shoulder and Trevor was welling up again.

“So-So you want me to join you?” he asked shyly when matt pulled back slightly. Matt smiled at him once more, that cheeky expression Trevor loved.

“You don’t have too. Not tonight if you don’t want to. Me and Jeremy, it’s a comfort thing and sure we love each other,” he meet Jeremy's eye’s who nodded into Trevor’s shoulder, “But this isn’t dating or anything. You can join us in it but it’s your choice.”

“Always your choice.” Jeremy echoed.

Trevor looked between the two feeling more cherished and loved at this moment then he ever had before.

“I choose you guys.” He said softly and that was that.

 

Only a few months later Trevor heard something that made his blood turn cold. He was finishing up some alternate documents for a couple of crew thugs, ones that leered at him and had him trying to remember what Jeremy had told him about handling a weapon. It was that name that had him listening in closer to their conversation as they waited for him to finish.

“That’s quiet the price. Are you sure it’s that little hitter?”

“I think so. Not many blokes that short huh? Shave that stupid wolverine looking beard, notice the dyed roots and you see the resemblance between Jerry and the kids photo.”

“So the old man wants his wayward kid back alive?”

“Heard it’s his grandpa.”

“The fuck is the kid doing hits for the boss if he’s got a fortune just waiting for him here?”

“Search me, but if you’re sure maybe we should take it up with the boss?”

“Where do you think I heard it from? Boss is waiting for him to report back from that bounty hit. Gonna ransom him back then.”

Trevor’s hands were shaking as he handed back the altered documents getting barely a grunt of thanks in reply. He didn’t give a fuck, packing up quickly with one hand, dialling Jeremy with the other. He got no answer but that wasn’t unusual when Jeremy was undercover in a different crew, leaving a frantic message for Jeremy to call him ASAP. He stuffed forging devices and markers into his bag, knowing he wasn’t come back here and uncaring if they knew he had stolen. He called Matt, throwing the bag over his shoulder, hurrying out of the building for his car.

“Axel to the maxel here.” Despite his panic, the phrase cut through Trevor’s brain and pulled him up short.

“Ah, matt?” he said slowly and matt gave a self-conscious chuckle, “Ok, I was just trying it out. Jeremy is always so confident when he answers his phone I thought a catch phrase would help me.”

“Yeah, sure Matt. To the max.”

“there a reason your calling or just to get fuel for me to never live down?” this brought Trevor back to the current crisis, managing to open his car door and jump in the little shit brick, slamming twice to get the door to stay shut.

“Yeah, Crews onto Jeremy’s rich grandad. Apparently there’s a reward for him returned to that old bastard.”

“I’ll start packing.” Matt said seriously, Trevor hearing the thief getting up and started bussing about, “I’m guessing you tried J?”

“Yep he’s still undercover to get that bounty, I left a message. When I hang up here I’ll try again. I’ll be home in twenty possibly fifteen if I can get the shit brick to really work for me.”

“I’ll try Jeremy too, we gotta be ready to clear out when he’s home.”

Trevor pushed the car hard after he hung up, hitting redial on Jeremy’s number but it kept ringing out. His little brick almost fell apart but he made it home, running up the stairs to the apartment, the elevator permanently broken. He took the stairs two at a time and burst into the apartment to find matt had gathered the majority of their stuff already.

The hugged hard, a frantic kiss shared between them then they were exchanging information.

“I couldn’t get a hold of him.”

“Me neither, left a bunch of messages though.”

“Think they got him?”

“No way. He checks in with us after a job before he sees the boss.”

They charged moment of worry, both wondering if this was the one time Jeremy wouldn’t call them first. Helpless to get a hold of him, instead they threw themselves into packing up, doing Jeremy’s stuff for him. Most of the furniture they would leave plus the utensils in the kitchen. What they would be taking is there little nest egg, a bag full of money stuffed into a hole in the wall and covered by the TV unit.

Trevor and Matt worked together lifting the heavy unit to get at their stash, both smiling in relief when they heard the door open. Trevor turned to look and almost dropped the until on matt’s toes when he saw what was coming into their safe space.

Alexander, the number two for their crew, flanked by three of his flat faced cronies. Matt cursed Trevor then looked up himself to see what had made Trevor drop his side of the unit. His face became pale under his facial hair, an echo of Trevor’s own bloodless state.

“Hello boys. Don’t mind us. You doing some rearranging here I see?” Alex said as two of his men searched the apartment, the third poking at the pile of bags and items on the kitchen table. Trevor spotted another two men in the lobby of their floor before the door swung closed.

“Looks like all three were packing here.” The cronies by the table said, the other two coming back in after a short search of the tiny apartment, shaking their heads. Alex turned back too Trevor and matt, the two having sidled closer together and oddly, Trevor a half step in front of matt, trying to shield him from the stares of these powerful men.

“Moving out?” Alex asked and Trevor forced himself to speak out, hoping nobody was noticing how hard he was shaking.

“My grandmothers sick. Very serious.”

“So all three of you are going?” Alex followed up and Trevor fell back on an old state, letting the fear wash through him, storing it to be felt later, freeing his face and stilling his body.

“Matt was. We we’re packing for Jeremy cause we knew he couldn’t afford rent here without us.” Alex gave a scoff, his henchmen echoed it stupidly and privately Trevor wanted to roll his eyes at the cliché. But it was hard to find amusement when that cliché pulled forth a silver pistol, running a hand over it fondly as he spoke.

“So your saying that little hitter isn’t here?” he asked and Trevor followed Alex with his whole head, taking a small shuffle back and extending an arm to have matt pressed to his back, just a side of him visible now.

“that’s what I’m saying.” He said slowly and Alex gave another hollow scoff.

“Grab them.” He ordered and the henchman came forward, Trevor holding out his hands on reflex. Matt, when Trevor lifted his arms, grabbed the cheap pistol that Trevor had on his waist, pulling it out and pointing it at the men.

“Back off!” he shouted and they paused. Trevor looked to matt amazed as the thief now took a shaky step in front of him, the roles reversed.

“We’re leaving. We don’t want any trouble. We just want to leave.” Alex waved his guys back, stepping into the tiny lounge space, approaching matt, the two backing up into the until they were moving.

“Stop or I’ll shoot you!” he threatened and Alex came to a halt, a hand space away from Matt’s extended hand.

“Come on kid. You forget. We found you. We took you in. We taught you everything you know. You’re not going to shoot me. You’re a dam good thief, I’ll give you that. But your no killer.” Matt swallowed hard and Trevor had never felt more attracted to him then this moment when matt’s hands steadied voice hard.

“Don’t tell me you know me. You have no idea what I’m capable of.” He said with only the slightest tremor. Alec even looked impressed, nodding his head and holding up his arms in surrender, his own gun still in hand.

“Your right kid. I don’t. But you do know what I’m capable of so seriously, this shouldn’t be a surprise.”

Matt screamed as the bullet tore through his arm, the gun dropping from limp fingers as matt fell to his knee’s holding his arm. Trevor lunged for him but a hard hand hit his face sending him spiralling away. Then hard hands were on him and he could hear matt calling out in pain as the two were pushed into their own kitchen chairs.

Trevor struggled and was hit again for his trouble, his wrists yanked behind him and tied together with some kind of cutting restraint. Matt was next to him, moaning, blood oozing from the bullet wound in his upper arm, his own arms restrained as much as Trevor’s. His attention was torn away by a bruising grip on his chin, forcing him to look into the dead eyes of Alex.

“Ok kid, you two are cute, real cute but I’m done playing. Tell me where your littlest friend is and you guys walk out of here.”

“I don’t know where he is, we were waiting for him.” He said back quickly and choked on his breath when a fist was driven into his gut. His head was yanked back up, unmindful of his ragged breaths.

“I don’t like that answer.” Alex said, eyes flashing dangerously, “try again.”

“We don’t know! He was on a job! He’s always quiet when he’s on a job!” Another grunt as he was hit again, this time across the face, forced to look up again with his head ringing

“Why we’re you packing? And if you say grandma, I’ll give you a scar to match the one matty here is gonna have.”

Trevor opened his mouth trapped. He didn’t want to mouth the lie to get him shot but he didn’t want to admit they had been fleeing before the crew could betray Jeremy. Alex saw the hesitation and grinned.

“Tell me the truth there handsome. You know he’s not worth it.” He coaxed and Trevor’s eyes turned inwards.

That first night, Jeremy and Matt had set him free, taken him home and without another word about it, adopted him. When the breeze tore through the thin walls, having shaggy, kind matt press to one side, strong, warm Jeremy on the other. A thousand moments, laughing, joking playing together. The small texts matt send him, the touches Jeremy gave that made him feel grounded and safe. The three guys, all sitting side by side, roaring in humour, tearing together apart in multiplayer even as they held each other together in real life.

Alex’s words had the opposite effect, Trevor hardening under that stare, his hands clenching into fists.

“We were packing to visit my sick grandmother.” He said defiantly and Matt rallied beside him, the two uniting in their bond against this enemy who wanted to destroy not just them but their third brother.

“You heard him. He’s got a sick grandmother you son of a bitch.” Matt spat out the pain burning away his shyness, touching down to the place of strength his brothers gave him. Alex narrowed his eyes and put the gun to Trevor’s arm.

“I did warn you.” He said coldly.

He never got to pull the trigger, a shout cut off outside the door followed by two heavy thuds had Alex turning towards the entrance. There was a beat of silence then the door was kicked off its hinge, Jeremy coming in, a silenced gun in each hand, ducking through and too the side, taking advantage of his shorter stature, the bullets hitting higher where a taller man’s head would be.

Two goons went down immediately, then one hid behind matt and Alex dove over the counter. Matt rocked on his chair and managed to tip over, slamming into Trevor. The two chairs went down, clearing the shot for Jeremy, coating his friends in the cronies blood. Alex came up, aiming for Jeremy but the young hit man ducked into the hall, the thin wall not a solid cover but without line of sight, Alex stopped firing.

“I got my gun pointed at your boyfriends head.” Alex yelled, sure enough, Matt looked up from where he had rolled off Trevor to see a gun pointed at him from around the counter.

“Which one?” Jeremy called and Trevor started twisting his wrists, both of them still attached to the upturned chairs.

“Does it matter?” Alex asked confused and Jeremy called back.

“Not really. Just wanted to know what side your on.” He called back casually. There was a moment of confusion between the three, gunman and hostages before they worked it out at roughly the same moment.

“It’s me!” screeched Matt at the same time Trevor shouted “Matt, Matt, matt!” leaving Alex with his last words as Jeremy rolled back into the lunge and shredded the cheap ass kitchen counter with bullets that lodged in Alex’s spine, the guns making deadly roars, the silencers removed.

“You little fuck-“ he started to say before the bullets passed through the rotting wood and soft flesh alike, the gun falling from jerking fingers to rest uncomfortably close to matt’s head.

“We clear?” Jeremy asked and matt didn’t answer head limp as he let relief and pain course through his body.

“Just those three and Alex.” Trevor said and Jeremy holstered his guns in the shoulder holsters before his was flipping open a switch blade and heading to Trevor. He sliced the bonds behind the lanky forger first then hurried to do the same too matt cursing when he saw the damage in matt’s arm.

“That fucking asshole.” Jeremy muttered darkly, pulling matt into his arms, tearing at the shirt of the body next to their legs, making a makeshift bandage. Trevor got his legs under him, getting up slowly to find that, yes, he did remember how to stand. Jeremy took care of Matt and Trevor steeled himself to walk around the destroyed counter to inspect Alex. The man was dead, his eyes already turning glassy, the floor around him congealing in a pool of blood.

Jeremy had pulled Matt up, his good arm around his shoulders and met Trevor’s eye’s.

“We gotta leave, you ok?” he asked quickly and Trevor nodded, letting out a shaky breath and looking back down at Alex as he spoke.

“I think I’m gonna have one hell of a cry later but I’m cool for now. How’s matt?” He looked over to the thief who had slipped into a shocked state, blood still pouring out, dripping down his fingers and Jeremy grunted to bring Trevor’s attention back to him.

“He’s going to be fine. Grab the Cash bag and our tools, leave everything else. We gotta ditch our phones too. Leave them here.”

As he spoke, he was dropping his own phone then fishing into the pocket of his spaced out friend. Trevor looked at his own cell, fingers clenching hard before he let it fall.

They’d take new photo’s and this time he’d print them out so he’d never had to lose them again. At least they had each other. He went and stretched behind the unit, long arms a plus since without his friends he couldn’t move the heavy thing. He snagged the strap and pulled out the weighty bag, putting it over his back. Jeremy had sat matt down and was shifting items around to pack one other backpack before sliding it on. He then heaved matt back onto his shoulder muttering soothing words to the thief.

They started out the door but Trevor stopped and turned in the doorway, looking in at the scene, unable to wrap his head around how quickly his life had changed once more. A hand tugged his and Jeremy pulled him close, pulling his head in for a hard kiss.

“I’m so fucking glad you’re safe. Come on, we got to get out of here and get matt fixed up.” Trevor let Jeremy tug him along, the short man showing his strength as he supported both his slimmer framed friends down the stairs. They stepped over another body at the bottom steps and there was a crowd gathered around a body slumped out of a car. Jeremy ducked his head and they walked the other way, turning a corner quickly.

“What’s our plan then?” Trevor asked as Matt begun to blink and look around, grimacing as he realised he was still in pain.

“Jack a car, get to a medic and get that bullet out of matt’s arm.” Jeremy said simply and Trevor saw his eyes had been scouring the street for a good mark.

“What about after?” Trevor pressed and Jeremy glanced at him then back to matt.

“I don’t know Trev. I can’t stay here and now neither can you guys.” He sounded apologetic about it and Trevor squeezed the big hand in his.

“There’s a good one.” He said pointing to a car that had some idiot just sitting there texting in the driver’s seat.

It was beyond simple for Jeremy to pull the driver out, throwing him onto the street as Trevor slid Matt into the back seat. They took off, avoiding police and gangs alike, getting Matt patched up under the nervous fingers of a doctor with a gun to his head. Then they drove out of liberty city, Matt curled into Trevor in the back seat, Jeremy driving, soft music playing around and between them as the sun set and stars shone.

“I got an idea.” Matt said slowly into a long silence that had fallen after they had discussed and rejected multiple options. He sounded irritated that he hadn’t thought of it before, but then again it could be the pain killers slurring his words and making them thick.

“A city on an island, somewhere guys with our skills are in demand. Somewhere full of money and dumb rich idiots hoping for their fifteen minutes. More importantly, somewhere we can disappear. No one will know you there Jeremy. No one will know any of us.”

“And where is it Matt?”

“Los Santos. We should go to Los Santos.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love those boys!  
> so next chapter is done just working on the next to stay ahead of you guys :)  
> what did you love?  
> What did you hate?  
> What do you want to see?  
> Let me know! thank you as usual to my usual commentors, getting to be so many (EEKK!!) love you guys encouragement and reactions and thank you to my new commonters and kudosers i can't beilve how many people are ready what really is just a crappy little fanfic i wrote cause i wanted to see how dark i could get lol  
> see you next chapter


	17. Remember when?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy is in bad shape prompting the crew to think back on what once was

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was a hard one. I started and stopped and altered and deleted but i gotta say i'm kinda proud of the end result. I love showing little moments of this crew being a family amounst the stresses of the moment. and really what else can you do when someone you love is dying but think back on parts of your lives together?  
> Angst and fluff and sadness ahead.

Ryan had wanted blood for so long, now he had it, he wanted to wish it away. Jeremy lay in his hands, dipping in and out of consciousness before finally becoming limp, no amount of words, begging or shouted orders bringing him back around. Geoff drove like a mad man, skipping through lanes, driving up on the sidewalk, dodging traffic in his haste to get to the nearest hospital.

“Jeremy! Jeremy open your eyes dam it!”

Mica was in a dangerous position, squatting behind Geoff’s seat, pressed against Jeremy’s side, keeping as much pressure as she could as they were thrown side to side. Ryan had ripped off his mask and was scrubbing franticly at his face with the wipes he carried for a quick change from vagabond to nameless no one. One hand stayed gripped on Jeremy’s.

“Lil J! Monster Truck! Jeremy! Fucking look at me!”

“We’re almost there, how is he?” Geoff called back and Ryan looked down at the bloodless face of his apprentice, wanting those chocolate brown eyes to open, to shine at him.

“Not good.” He said heavily voice alot softer then when he had been trying to bring Jeremy around. and Geoff was skidding into the emergency exit, cutting off an ambulance. Ryan was already moving, kicking the door open, Jeremy cradled in his arms once more. They pounded after Geoff, Nurses and doctors shouting at the sight of the four, blood running free.

Oh god, how much more could he lose?

“My friend! He was mugged! Stabbed! He’s been bleeding like crazy!” Geoff called and there was a trolley before him, hands and voices trying to get him to give Jeremy to them. They didn’t realise that only his grip on Lil’J stopped him from slaughtering everyone here.

“James! Put him down. They’re gonna save him.” His arms tightened, defiant at Geoff who was using his fake ID name.

“You’re killing him if you don’t let go.” Geoff's put his hand on his arm coaxing him to let the doctors take their patient. With the greatest of reluctance, he put Jeremy down, arms buzzing with the emptiness where there used to be his apprentice. The doctors wheeled him away and through double doors out of sight. Ryan tried to follow but Geoff was in his face.

“Move.” He said once, the only warning he was going to give.

“No.” Geoff said and Ryan brought his hands up to snap Geoff’s neck until there was a prick against his side and a thin arm around his waist.

“Don’t wanna do that big guy. That’s our boss you’re threatening.” Mica said coolly, outsiders thinking she was simply embracing her distraught friend, not seeing the blade to Ryan’s ribs.

“Ok, you’re going to take a deep fucking breath Ryan.” Geoff coached and Ryan clenched his hands into fists, lowering them slowly as he breathed in.

“Ok, let it out, clear your head. Jeremy needs you too get under control.”

Control. Right. He let the power inside him, waft up, let the light burn away everything until it prickled under his skin but not bursting forth, control coming from the orders of his master.

“You are going to sit right there and not murder a single person ok? These people are here to help Jeremy. Now I gotta talk to some people, give his info. You know what Id he was carrying tonight?” Ryan pushed past the haze in his brain to think what ID Jeremy had been using lately.

“Jackson. Jason Jackson Junior.” Ryan said slowly and Geoff spared a second to scoff at Jeremy’s humour.

“Alright. Stay here.” He backed up the order by pressing hard at Ryan’s shoulder, thumb pressed against the bullet scar. Mica followed behind Geoff, her job now to act as his guard. Ryan was left alone to stare at his hands, blood on his fingers. For the first time, it made him feel sick.

They were there for an hour before Geoff came back, sitting beside him and putting an arm around his shoulders, Ryan alot calmer now.

“Ok so Jeremy’s in surgery. He’s lost a fucktonne of blood but they needed to work on the damage.”

“What damage?” Geoff sighed at the question so harshly bitten out.

“Nicked his intestines. Their worried about infection so if he get’s through the surgery then he’s staying here for awhile.” Ryan's brain noticed the loaded word in that sentence.

“If?” he looked to Geoff, whose face was a mask of warning, telling Ryan to keep it under wraps.

“Yes. If. We’ll know more shortly. Do you want to stay or do you want to help the lads find who did this.” Ryan snorted the question not a question at all. Of course, he wanted to find who did this, wanted to tear them to shreds, pull them apart with his bare hands. Have them die screaming as he laughed, playing in the very organs that they had harmed in his Jeremy.

“Stay.” The word fell out surprising himself. Geoff nodded like this was what he had expected, rubbing the shoulder under his palm.

“Alright big guy. I told them you’re Jason’s Boyfriend James. All news will come directly to you. I’m leaving Mica here-“

“No.” Ryan cut him off shaking his head hard.

“No Geoff, it was hard enough to split from you at the docks. You need a guard, especially after tonight.” Geoff reluctantly gave in and tilted Ryan towards him so he could kiss his forehead with a scratchy moustache making Ryan itch.

“Alright. Are you gonna be ok here? I know you only had a play yesterday but this is a pretty stressful fucking situation.” Ryan took the question seriously gauging his need, the dark self and his stress. He was full from his play the night of the bomb fire so that shouldn’t be a driving force. His dark self was agitated with the harming of its partner but back under his control, shied away from the light that Ryan used to cage it. And his stress was going to kill him but not others. Now he was calmer he could see the situation better. He wasn’t going to go off here.

Not unless they told him, they had failed.

“I should be ok.” He said and Geoff gave him another squeeze before sighing heavily and getting up.

“Ok, I’m gonna head out, keep me updated. I gotta call alex, tell him to come back.” Ryan looked up sharply his voice hard.

“No!” he almost shouted then when Geoff stared at him in warning and confusion, he altered his tone, “No please Geoff. He needs this time. Really needs it. Jeremy,” and his voice caught at the name, “Wouldn’t want it to be because of him, Alex came home early.”

“I’ll give Alex the rest of tonight.” Geoff relented,” I couldn’t go get him now anyway. But he is coming home tomorrow. It’s not fair to keep him out of this.” Ryan nodded and didn’t look up again as his friend left him there, Jeremy’s blood drying on his hands.

Ryan was thinking back to the previous night and how much Jeremy had wanted to go with the lads. Geoff couldn’t go, his presence was too awe inspiring for the lower members, would have brought the festive air too much of a formal feel. The lads couldn’t be responsible for Jeremy, not with a live burning. Besides the other two needed some time to themselves to just relax. And Ryan, well, Ryan refused him.

“Please rye? I could go if you did!” Jeremy had begged him, pining the gent to the wall by the door with his body, pinching his cheek with teeth. Ryan had chuckled, running his hands under Jeremy’s shirt as the Lad pressed against him, hand digging into his sides, nipping now at a lip.

“Come on rye-bread. Pretty please?” he had asked so nicely Ryan had felt bad when he had to say no, grabbing Jeremy’s hips and pushing him away.

“Oh, it’s tempting. I always like a good roasting, but I gotta pass.” His head had thunked when Jeremy had shoved him again, Geoff glancing up at them from his seat then back to the screen where he was playing Gears. Ryan knew he had to leave now before Geoff changed his mind.

“Ryan come on man!” Ryan wrapped his fingers around Jeremy’s wrists, pulling them away from his chest.

“I’m sorry, but I got things I need to do.”

“What things?” Jeremy demanded irritated and Ryan narrowed his eyes starting to get fed up with the tone.

“Things Jeremy. I don’t have to explain myself to you.” There was Heat between them and Ryan dared Jeremy to hit him with his eye’s undecided in this second wether he wanted Edgar to play with or Jeremy in his bed. The lad had decided for him, backing off him with an angry grunt.

“Fucking asshole.” He muttered and had stalked away to the fridge. Ryan had given a smile of victory, gave Geoff a small salute and had been out the door.

Maybe that’s why he had opted to stay. He had left Jeremy once. He wasn’t doing that again.

 

Geoff had ordered Mica back to Lindsay as he pulled up at his garage. It safe enough for him to travel up from his private garage to his penthouse. He wasn’t worried about Mica, the girl was quick on her feet and he knew she’d get home just fine. She still had to text and say she had made it.

He gave himself a moment in the elevator to slump against the wall and put his head in his hands. What a fucked up night. When it rains it fucking shits all over, Geoff thought to himself. Hullum, back from the grave, McCormick, at large, Crackerjacks all shitted off and Jeremy laying so blank as the gurney took him out of Geoff’s range.

What the fuck is a crew boss meant to do?

He allowed the journey to the penthouse to wallow in grief and self-pity before the bell chimed and he straightened up answering himself.

“Fucking get shit done.” He said to no one and strode out of the elevator, into the penthouse like the Steel spined crew boss he was.

Gavin was seated on the couch, head in his hands, Michael pacing, still shirtless under his jacket. They looked up when Geoff came in and then his arms were full of Gavin, Michael pressed right behind both talking over each other.

“We didn’t find fucking shit, they-“

“Geoff! Oh I’m so glad your -“

“-took photos for Alex to fucking tell us-“

“-gonna be fine right? Like he’s-“

“-put out the lock down call, She’s a fucking champ-“

“-came home and no one’s here so-“

“SHUT UP!” Geoff shouted and the barrage stopped, Gavin looking up from where he was hugged around him, Michael close over Gavin's shoulder. Geoff put an arm around Gavin and a hand on Michaels shoulder.

“Lil’J alive.” He said and both Lads instantly melted, Gavin letting go into Geoff's suit, Michael turning his head and closing his eyes for an instant, breathing deep. Geoff gave Gavin a squeeze then gently disentangled himself from the sniffling lad, waving a hand at the table so they’d sit there while he grabbed the Jack Daniels and three glasses.

He sat at the head of the table, as was his want, Michael on his left and Gavin the right. He passed out the glasses and filled them before his own, giving himself almost double theirs. They all drank, no one looking at the empty chairs around them. Michael’s glass hit the table with a thunk, Gavin was coughing but took another burning sip and Geoff downed his whole glass.

He poured another round as he spoke.

“Jeremy is in bad shape. Luckily, he and Ryan are our two least recognisable members so they’re cover should be safe. Ryan staying with him, he’ll call when there’s any change.”

“Change from what?” Gavin asked quickly and Geoff took another swig to give himself a moment to answer without his voice betraying him.

“He was in surgery when I left. He lost a lot of fucking blood. Like more than a human should be without.”

“Yeah fucking right Geoff, we all know blood is meant to be in the fucking body, spit it out!” Michael was the one to snap this time and Geoff quietened him with a look from those heavy lidded eyes. Michael took another breath and finished his glass, pouring another.

“His intestines got blended. All the shit that’s meant to stay in them got into his body so they had to clean that out and stitch him up. They didn’t have time to wait for his blood to replenish itself before he went in to surgery.” He looked into the glass of brown liquid as he felt the words fall from his lips to land on the table before them.

“He’s chances aren’t good.”

He remembered the first time he had seen Jeremy. They had a job given over to them by a trusted contact. To pull it off they needed a sixth man, the glaring hole in their range of skills. A sniper. Alex had spoken at length with Lindsay and had met Jeremy on two occasions before this one, feeling him out, doing the back check. Now Geoff was meeting the kid.

Alex and Michael had been with him, people looking up from their desks or where they were crating up drugs or guns in that warehouse. They walked straight by, Lindsay cocking a thumb at the office before turning back to a blonde Jesus looking guy who was holding a huge picture frame and arguing he wanted the memento.

The little office was small, with three four desks crammed against each other. On the far left, monitor facing the door was the occupied one, Jeremy looking up then pulling his head set off when Boss Ramsey walked in.

“Mr Ramsey! Sir!” He had flushed red and with a little bit of scrambling managed to stand up, extending a hand over the monitor. Geoff heard Michael snicker behind him and Alex’s heavy sigh but for politeness sakes, they all decided silently to ignore the fact Jeremy had someone stashed under his desk.

“What brings you here? Lindsay’s out on the floor.” He was burning brighter and brighter with each passing moment as Geoff sized him up.

“Actually we are looking for you. Surely Alex here has been talking to you about a job?” Jeremy’s eyes had flickered to Alex’s face and back, nodding quickly.

“Yes sir. He said you needed a far seeing eye sir. That’s me.” He was growing more confident the longer they didn’t call him on his hidden lover and Geoff nodded impressed by the kid’s gumption.

“How well do you do in a group kid?” Jeremy hovered his arms around the mess, indicating the tables.

“We work closely together here sir.”

“Yeah real close...” Michael murmured behind Geoff and chuckled again as Jeremy flushed once more, now knowing he was busted. Geoff let out his own laugh and nodded at the desk.

“Go on, may as well get them out of there. Can’t be comfortable.” A dark tousled head appeared, white skin pink with embarrassment as Geoff recognised their expert forger, having sat down with the kid to do his newest identify and finding the documents passed even the strictest of testing. Alex started to laugh now, and then Jeremy and Trevor were starting to let out nervous chortles. The humour built until they were all roaring with laughter, Geoff wandering around the desk to put an arm around each guy, still letting out his ridiculous bray.

“I like you kids! I think your gonna fit in fine!” he had announced.

And he had, filling the space they never really understood they were missing. Even his friends, Trevor and Matt become a common fixture, coming in and out of the penthouse, visiting, playing hanging out. For a time they were even on the deal with Michael. An odd thought came to Geoff as he sat remembering. Come to think of it, those guys hadn’t been by in ages, the few times when they had, tense and quickly ended. Jeremy’s problem had bled into other parts of his life it seems before they figured out what he needed.

“Geoff!” Michael yelled, slamming a palm by his drink. Geoff looked up and shook his head.

“Sorry, drifted off there I think. It’s been a long night.” Michael wasn’t buying it but he wasn’t going to press, more important things on his mind.

“Well give me a minute to get another fucking shirt then we can be on our way.” He said starting to get up. Gavin started to follow but Geoff stopped them.

“We are not going anywhere. You guys are going to bed.”

“What?!” the two chorused and Geoff got serious with them.

“All we got right now is us three. So I need you guys on top of your fucking game. That means at least four hours of sleep got it?” they argued but he glared them down. Michael kicked the table, spilling the bottle and glasses and stormed away in frustration, ranting. Gavin gave a long look at Geoff who nodded after Michael.

“Go calm him down will ya?” he asked and Gavin nodded determinedly, racing after his boy and shutting the bedroom door behind them so the sound was muffled. Knowing he should wait until Michael calmed down, Geoff called Alex anyway, wanting it over and done with so he could go to bed. It took all his self-control not to beg Alex to come home now. The big guy sounded so happy though, Geoff found himself agreeing with Ryan.

At least one of them should sleep soundly tonight.

 

“Michael please!” Gavin was trying to soothe him, hands trying to pat him down, but Michael threw him off, putting his foot through the wall in a gesture that did nothing to help his fury.

“How Fucking could he send us to Fucking bed like we’re Fucking Shit machines? Fucking children! Lil’J is out there,” he jabbed a finger at the window towards the city, “Fucking dyeing on a table and Geoff says Go the fuck to bed?! Fuck that noise!” He ranted but made no move to leave the room. Gavin falling to sit on the end of his bed, his golden voice even.

“Michael, see reason. We can’t do anything tonight. We need Alex back to help comb the scene for evidence and right now your Geoff’s only available guard and no way would he let me go out on my own.” They all knew Gavin's skills were in negotiation and hacking, every time Gavin had tried anything physical had turned out not good for everyone involved.

“Why the fuck didn’t you go help him!” Michael now turned on Gavin who’s rarely stocked anger flared as Michael hit upon the guilt that had been building from the moment Gavin had heard Jeremy cry out.

“because I couldn’t do shit for him and I knew you could! Because I promised him to have his back by having it further away! Because if I had gone you’d have three dead lads instead of two!” Gavin yelled back at Michael, standing up from the bed, and the unexpected mention of the last time they were in this situation derailing the fired up muscleman. Michael almost fell against Gavin, both lads starting to well up as they realised they could right now be losing Jeremy just as they lost the last lad.

“I’m sorry boi! You did right man, I just don’t-don’t wanna lose you too!” Michael grumbled into Gavin's neck, both shaking with emotion. They couldn’t lose another lad. Originally Michael hadn’t even wanted Jeremy as a permanent fixture.

“Wow, so this is Demo disk huh?” Jeremy had said long ago, eyeing the bright fluorescent disc spin the words ‘DEMO’ above them. Gavin had one long arm around Jeremy’s neck and the other pulling the grumpy Michael to his side.

“Sure is J! And we are VVVIP’s!” he crowed, moving them up to the bouncer.

“names?”

“team lads!” Gavin shouted only to get elbowed hard by Michael. Gavin bent in two and Michael stepped forward.

“Team lads and guest.” He said coldly, behind him Jeremy hiding his hurt behind a poker face. The bouncer let them in, passing Jeremy a temp VIP badge. Michael took off straight to the bar while Gavin had replaced his arm over Jeremy, recovering quickly, Michaels elbow a common occurrence.

“Don’t worry about him. He takes time to warm up. I got your back thou Lil’J!”

Gavin tried to cheer Jeremy up all night as the drink started to pour and they were joined by none other than Funhaus allies, James, Joel and Spoole. Michael was actually enjoying himself watching Joel and James make their youngest member shy member uncomfortable by lap dancing their table. Sometimes it was hard to remember the Spoole had a kill count of over 250 when he was blushing hard under his standard cap. Speaking of stupid headwear, the Stetson wearing idiot had disappeared from their table, citing drinks but hadn’t returned yet.

Michael had felt nothing but irritation at that but Gavin the moron had been trying hard to get him to give the new guy a chance. As Michael looked, Gavin was worriedly scanning the dance floor, lap full of James ignored until the hit man bonked him on his oversized nose.

“What? I’m not pretty enough for you?” he asked half joking half interested and Gavin gave him a reassuring grin and a quick peck.

“Nah your plenty pretty James, just Lil’J been gone for a bit.”

“That little guy?” he asked, shifting off Gavin’s lap. Joel was now paying attention, releasing Spoole from his grip, the younger guy looking up with his lips pash red. Michael sighed heavily, slamming his glass down.

“Fucking asshole. Who wanders the fuck off when he’s being welcomed? I tell yay R-“

“You haven’t” Cut in Gavin glaring at him. Michael had blinked a little blearily.

“You haven’t welcomed him. You barely talk to him. God you barely talk to me anymore!” Gavin stood up, bracing a hand on the table, pointing at Michael. The three Funhaus guys exchanged looks and started to shuffle off, not bothering to say goodbye to guys who won’t notice.

“He’s gone Michael! And he’s not coming back! Now Jeremy is here, he’s saved your ass and mine more than once since he’s been bumped up to main team. I suggest you stop being a mingly little toss and dig up a bit of team spirit. Lad.” Gavin had given him a final glare then had stormed off into the crowd leaving Michael to nurse his drink and his guilt.

He had eventually gotten up and followed Gavin only to find Jeremy had gotten into a full on brawl, defending the honour of FAKEAH against some wanna be cockbites. Gavin had gotten there before him, seeing Jeremy holding off two dudes, James and Spoole having found and joined the fray, trying to restore order to their club.

“I got your back!” Gavin had crowed, throwing himself at one of the guys Jeremy was fighting, missing at taking down Jeremy instead. Michael had used his beer bottle as a weapon, jumping in and giving Jeremy room to get Gavin off him and up again. The two had fought back to back until Funhaus reinforcements arrived. Nothing like a good fight together to cement a bond.

It had helped that all three Lads had provided a united front when they had sat, nursing bruises and sprains in kovic’s office as both Kovic and Ramsey ripped it out of their respective crews. None of them cared and the bosses gave them up for a lost cause.

Michael and Gavin crawled into bed together, cuddling close as they thought about their fellow lad. They didn’t think they could cope if another Lad left them.

Not again.

 

Alex was beyond furious. A whole week of relaxation bled out in that short simple seven word sentence.

“Don’t freak out, but Jeremy was hurt.”

“WHAT!?”

“I said DON’T freak out!”

“What?! When! Where! Why Geoff!?”

“He was covering an exit for me when someone got the drop and shanked his side. He’s in the hospital now, out of surgery, just waiting for him to wake.”

“He’s in a god dam coma?!”

“Watch your volume man. Christ.”

 Alex was ready to slam Geoff’s head into the dash and take over the driver’s seat for himself. Geoff liked to fall into that who cares tone when shit got real and there was no alcohol around to grease the pain. He tried to remember that Geoff did care, both about Jeremy and himself but Alex couldn’t help but feel he had been shunted aside and forgotten once more.

“You can’t tell me Jeremy’s been stabbed and in hospital then tell me to watch my volume Geoff!” he let out some of his hurt at his friend who winced, knowing Alex was right.

“Ok, I’m sorry. Look, I just knew you really needed a break and I didn’t want to ruin your holiday. I swear if you hadn’t called me this morning I was going to tell you today.”

“When did this happen?”

“last night.”

“LAST NIGHT!!”

Geoff told Alex everything that had happened over the past seven days, Alex growing more and more concerned with each word. He groaned into his hands, and trying to rub away the headache forming behind his eyes. As Geoff trailed off, everything reported as they drove back towards Los Santos, silence fell. After a time Geoff started to glance towards his oldest friend who stared out the side window.

“Well?” Geoff asked after another period passed.

“well what?”

“Well something , come on man I need you.” Alex sighed at those words, closing his eyes and counting too ten, putting all his hurt and anxiety and rejection behind the great big wall of Alex. He knew he had to just forgive and forget that apparently his own fellow gents had both conspired to leave him out of this. He had to just let it go…

“Alex seriously?” Jeremy followed him out of the apartment, the sounds of Geoff fixing himself a victory drink, the tinkle of glasses and that smug laugh following them. Alex didn’t pause, getting in the elevator and sighing when Jeremy got in with him.

“You’re just going to let this go?” Jeremy asked him and Alex nodded, folding his arms and watching the floors pass. Jeremy shoved his arm, getting his attention.

“What the hell man. Why do you just give in all the time.” Jeremy demanded an answer and alex was relieved when the elevator doors opened, admitting him into their garage.

“Go back upstairs Jeremy.” Alex ordered, getting into his car. Jeremy helped himself into the passenger seat, buckling in to show he was staying.

“So where are we going?” he asked as Alex just shook his head and started up the motor. The doors opened admitting sunlight that the tinted windows dimmed as they pulled out onto the street.

“We’ll there was no we. I was thinking of doing what I was ordered.”

“Nah, Geoff is being stupid, your plan is so much better.”

“He’s the boss Jeremy.”

“And your his second in command! I’m not saying don’t do the job, I’m saying get it done your way for once.”

Alex grumbled and gripped the steering wheel tight. He obeyed the road rules, pushing the speed limit slightly and trying to ignore the font of annoyance beside him.

“Team biggie smalls. You know cause your big and I’m small?”

“Why does it matter? We are not a team Jeremy. I was sent on this job solo. I’m dumping you with the car by the way. So why do we need a team name?” He glanced at the sniper at his side and instantly felt guilty, Jeremy looked like Alex had run over a puppy or something. Alex hated hurting any of his family so he reached out a placed a hand on Jeremy’s leg, patting him soothingly.

“Look I’m sorry. I just kinda want to do this and go home.” He pointed out and Jeremy nodded his head still looking miserable.

“yeah cool I get it. I mean everyone else has cool team names but you know whatever. I’ll just take the car home for you.” Alex rolled his eyes knowing he was being played by the little peeks Jeremy was giving him from his upset position.

“team Biggie smalls sounded ok.” He relented and Jeremy perked right up clapping his hands once and pumping a fist.

“All right! Team Biggie smalls it is! Now let’s go steal some jets!”

“Geoff said helicopter.”

“No, Geoff said send a message. I believe your idea of jets would send the appropriate message.” Jeremy winked at him and Alex couldn’t help feeling better and laughing at the new guy’s cocky attitude. He had a way of making Alex feel wanted and respected that was sometimes missing from average crew life…

Like right now, Geoff ignoring him despite clear happenings around the crew. Was he Geoff's second or wasn’t he? It didn’t matter that Geoff wanted him to enjoy his holiday. Jeremy could die and Alex might not make it to say goodbye all because Geoff wanted to give him one more night with pet.

That was not cool.

“Geoff, you came to me, blew the door to my life wide open and changed it forever. You cannot just dump me whenever it feels convenient to you, and expect me to be ok with it.”

“I didn’t dump you, I-“

“Jeremy could die! That’s what you’re saying right?! Even before that. You have a meet up with a dead guy you call your second! You have a chase scene with a new enemy and the god dam police department, You fucking ask me for advice or tell me to come home!”

“Jeremy wouldn’t have want-“

“Jeremy doesn’t want dick right now! I swear Geoff, if he dies before I get to see him again, I will leave you this time.” Geoff looked to Alex who held his eyes seriously. After a honk and a car swerving, Geoff pulled his view back to the road, nodding his head.

“Ok, ok. I admit it. I’ve been a Asshole boss and a crumby friend. I’m sorry Al. I really, really am.” He reached out and grabbed Alex’s hand, squeezing it.

“But you won’t have to leave anything because Jeremy is gonna live and he’s gonna wake up.” Geoff said confidently. Alex shook his head again, tears prickling as he squeezed the hand in his back, two crazy ass mother fucking murdering gang boss and his second, succumbing to human emotions for a moment.

“Who are you trying to convince here Geoff? Me? Or yourself?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo hope you enjoyed that i know i did :)  
> What do you want to see? let me know!  
> thank you as always to my wonderful comments and judosers and I'll be seeing you real soon for a new chapter!  
> Oh i got a little shorter thing going back to bombfire night, should i post or nah? let me know! not super plot important but still kinda cool


	18. Visiting hours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Visting hours are over by twopm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK so just a heads up, these are going to start slowing down because  
> A) real lifes a bitch and i need to live it lol  
> B) you guys are starting to catch up, as things get more complicated and i have less time to write, i can't keep far ahead  
> Anywho enjoy this chapter, it is a dialogue heavy but sometimes you just need to take a second and talk it out lol

Jeremy’s surgery had gone well as could be but the shock his body had gone through losing so much blood had taken much from him. The anaesthesia had worn off a few hours ago and yet he still hasn’t woken. The doctor tried to put it in a way Ryan could understand.

“The sheer amount of volume lost was over the amount a human body can spare; his body is now just conserving energy. Think of it like a reboot maybe?”

“Well when will he wake?”

The doctor had sighed, looking to Jeremy sadly, as he answered.

“He could wake in the next hour. Or...He might not wake up at all.” He gave the news as softly as he could looking to meet Ryan's alarmed eyes, “His body is trying to protect itself but the lack of oxygen carrying blood cells means there could be more damage to vital organs then we can tell right now. The wound itself was priority. Now we wait.”

Ryan glanced between Jeremy, lying as if he was asleep, blankets rucked up his chest, arms free of the sheets so drips, and machines could be hooked to his skin, and the doctor, looking at him with sympathy in his eyes. Ryan stuttered, anxiety burning away in his gut and he found the shine of tears in his eyes were not an act for the doctors benefit.

“Are you saying he’s got brain damage? From a stab wound to his side?!” the doctor shrugged his shoulders helplessly, putting a hand on Jeremy’s foot through the blanket. Ryan's eyes locked onto that touch and anger flushed through him. The doctor spoke, unaware of his danger.

“Again Mr. King. We can’t tell just yet. The lack of oxygen in his body could have damaged him in multiple ways. We had to deal with the immediate threat and right now, Jason is too weak to be subjected to tests. If he wakes, that will be a very good sign. If he doesn’t, we will keep an eye on his vitals and begin testing when it seems his body can stand it.”

He lifted his hand off Jeremy’s foot, looking to his clipboard for information to pass on and Ryan took a deep breath in then out, reminding himself that if he murdered the doctor, he couldn’t stay at the hospital with Jeremy any longer. The doctor looked up and gave him another sympathetic look that had Ryan's fingers twitching.

“If you need anything, don’t hesitate to buzz the nurses. Someone will be in every hour, monitoring Jason.” Ryan nodded his acknowledgement and the Doctor left, thankfully not trying to touch him. Ryan didn’t think he could take that sitting down. He had to manually loosen the grip he had on Jeremy’s hand as he watched the young man sleep.

He had been so relieved when they had brought him to this room, had seen Jeremy hooked up to IV’s and Blood, looking peacefully asleep. He had taken a seat on the opposite side to the door, so he could watch the entrance for any threats. He hadn’t slept and he watched as with time, each nurse seemed to be a little more concerned until finally the doctor had been called to explain that Jeremy should have stirred by now.

If Jeremy died, this hospital and everyone in it was going to become ash.

Ryan looked away from his precious apprentices face when he heard a commotion from the hall. He relaxed as he recognised that derogating voice.

“No you don’t understand bitch! I got told my brother is here fucking dying so you tell me what room!”

“Whoa, hey calm down boi! The nice nurses are going to help us all right? I’m sorry about him, he’s very upset. Please, we just want to be there for his brother and partner. Their very close to us, we can’t let James go through this alone.” Ryan went back too tracing the lines on the back of Jeremy’s hand as Gavin undid the damage Michael had made and sweet talked himself into the room.

Michael came in first, a disapproving nurse on his heels and Gavin behind her.

“You made it.” Ryan said, coating his voice in relief that wasn’t all faked. Michael came around to give Ryan a rare hug, as the nurse started to soften.

“Of course I did. That’s my brother there and you fucking are too.” Michael said a little loudly in Ryan’s ear. It worked, the nurse placing an arm on Gavin's, his other arm full of items.

“Please just keep the volume down? Visiting hours are over at 2”

“Thanks so much love. We appreciate it.” Gavin assured her and she left. Ryan came around the bed, Michael taking his seat and Jeremy’s hand, to approach Gavin who gave him a one armed hug.

“How you holding up Rye?” Gavin asked and Ryan gave a small little snort of amusement.

“No one’s dead yet so good?” Gavin smiled back then he jumped as if he had forgotten, even though he was the one holding the stuff.

“We didn’t think you would have had anything so I brought you sandwiches from that crappy little cafe down the hall.” He presented two plastic sandwich containers that Ryan took unenthusiastic, not having an appetite. From his place by Jeremy’s side Michael got his attention.

“And because I’m not a fucking idiot, I hooked you up with what you really need.” He said and pulled from his jacket pocket a diet coke. Ryan was much more visibly happy to see that, almost snatching it out of his hand, dropping the food on a chair and cracking it. As Gavin talked Ryan into having a bite to eat with his diet coke, Michael looked back to Jeremy.

He looked so small. He had always been short but when he was awake, Jeremy was always larger than life, making you almost forget he was a good half a head shorter than the next shortest person in their crew was was. His face was still pale despite the blood transfusion Ryan explained he had had.

“Hey Jeremy.” Michael said quietly, ignoring the chatter behind him as Ryan filled Gavin in on Jeremy’s condition, the British man feeding him bits of sandwich during the pauses.

“So you didn’t bleed out. Awesome. Now you gotta wake the fuck up man.” He squeezed the limp hand in his, eye’s searching for any sign his friend could hear him, “Seriously. Open your fucking eyes. We got shit to do.” Nothing. No twitch. His hair looked ridiculous, crew green against the white pillows. Michael frowned and told him so.

“You look like a oompa fucking loompa.” He grumbled.

“Ok, you need to sleep now.” Gavin told Ryan who had eaten at least one sandwich and had drained his coke. Ryan rubbed his eyes and shook his head. Gavin put a hand on the exhausted mans shoulder supporting.

“When’s the last time you slept huh? Michael and I can watch out for you guys. We’re coming off a solid... well like three or so hours but better than nothing.”

“I can’t leave.” Ryan admitted, looking first at Gavin then to the bed. Gavin followed his eyes and sighed, rubbing Ryan's shoulder.

“I know. But what you can do is lay down on this comfy chair here,” His spare hand patted the armrest of the chair Ryan was in, “Lay your head back and close your eyes for five.”

“Gavin.” Ryan's voice dipped into dangerous but Gavin was uncaring of the warning.

“No Ryan. You need to sleep some ok? Michael’s got another can of diet coke in it for ya if you can sleep or at least pretend to for an hour. We will wake you if anything, anything... Happens. I promise.”

Ryan blinked and for a moment forgot how to open his eyes again. He had no choice but to give in, Gavin helping him out of his jacket then pooled it like a pillow onto his shoulder. Gavin petted back his hair and gave him a small smile, then left him be to take up the other side of Jeremy’s bed. Ryan leant his head to the side, onto his jacket and didn’t know when he slipped from watching the three lads too much needed sleep.

“Out like a light, the little angel.” Gavin murmured to Michael, looking over at their favourite serial killing nut job. Michael also glanced up and gave a small scoff.

“God it’s weird to see Ryan as Ryan out in the real world.”

“Tell me about it.” Gavin agreed, then looked to Jeremy, the quiet falling until all they could hear were the beeps of machines and he soft snores coming from the corner. Jeremy was so still, only the soft rise and fall of his chest indicating to the lads that their brother was still with them.

“Do you think he hears us? Like every TV show ever says he can right?” Gavin asked softly after some time. Michael shrugged looking at his best friend.

“I dunno Gav. I did... I did try.” He coloured and fell back on his anger to defend himself from embarrassment, “So fucking sue me, I give a shit about him ok?”

“No, no. It’s cool Michael. You hear that Jeremy? Team lads need you. Ryan's gonna go off his rocker if you don’t wake up soon.” The two lads spoke softly both too and about Jeremy, trying to reassure each other as Ryan slept on. A nurse came in and they went quiet as she checked vitals, giving them a smile and nodding at Ryan.

“It’s good to see him sleeping.” She noted and Gavin smiled back her, Michael rudely ignoring her, adjusting the sheets on Jeremy. The nurse hesitated then asked Gavin who seemed most approachable.

“The police got a statement from their two friends who had been with them at the time of the attack. Due to Jason’s condition, they have been holding off interviewing James. However, we aren’t going to be able to keep them out much longer. Jason is stabilising, so we’re running out of excuses.” She said apologetically and Gavin gave her a thankful wide look that made her feel like she was his personal angel.

“You guys have been fobbing the police off? To give him time?” he asked disbelieving. She nodded and he got up, hugging her.

“Thank you. I don’t think James could have dealt with that by himself. If you like, I can go talk to them?” he moved back peering into her face but she shook her head reluctantly.

“No, unfortunately they need James’s statement. If you like, I’ll bring them in after James wakes so you can be here.”

“Thank you love. That would be top.” They said their goodbyes and she ducked out, no doubt going to gush too the other nurses about the charming British man who was so grateful to them all.

“What a dumb tart.” Gavin said affectionately and sat back down. Michael rolled his eyes then checked his phone.

“Geoff and Alex are an hour out.” he informed Gavin who had gone back to murmuring to Jeremy. They shared a look then their eye’s slid away. They were bursting with energy to find the people who did this and yet now, having seen Jeremy, they felt as if the moment they left he’d just slip away.

An oddly peaceful death for one of their own.

Ryan woke up with a start when Geoff and Alex entered, Gavin having come out to guide them into the room. He sat up quickly, hand falling to holster only to comprehend it wasn’t there. It wasn’t needed anyway with the four other men in the room.

“Morning sunshine.” Geoff said, moustache twitching as Alex made his way straight to Jeremy, taking Michaels spot.

“How is he?” Ryan said immediately, eye’s finding Jeremy as still as when he had gone to sleep.

“The same. Here.” Michael answered, handing Ryan his promised diet coke. The little room was getting crowded but no one cared. Ryan was up, coming around so he was standing near Jeremy’s head. Alex was on one side, Gavin back at the other. Geoff and Michael rounded out the group, standing at the end of the bed, Geoff with his arm around Michael’s shoulders.

“So what’s the plan?” Alex asked Geoff, and Ryan was the one who answered.

“We find who has done this and we set an example.” He said simply, eyes hard, expression deadly, at odds on the gently way he ran his knuckles down Jeremy’s cheek.

“I thought that’s a given. But we got to find this tosspot first.” Gavin put in then looked to Geoff, “I can see what I can pull from the street cameras around the area.”

“And the dock cam’s too don’t forget Gav.” Alex reminded their hacker who nodded.

“Those should be easy. B teams hacker that kid Andy? He should have gotten into that system, put the live feed on our system and sent a loop to the originals for the fight anyway.” Geoff nodded his agreement.

“Do that. Michael, you and mica spotted tyre tracks right? Well you take Alex, go check it out. See if you can find any other sign of who could have done this.”

Gavin put a hand up and Geoff rolled his eyes, the tension breaking just slightly.

“Yes Gav?”

“Nurse gave us a heads up, police will be in soon to talk to Ryan.” He pointed his thumb at the gent who shrugged.

“Let them come. Geoff, just let me know what you and Mica said and I’ll back your story. Simple.” He shrugged again and went back to looking at Jeremy who had showed no sign of hearing them, this whole time. Alex frowned and shot a quick glare at Geoff before addressing Ryan.

“I don’t think it will be that simple. They may be faded almost to nothing but I bet you dollars to donuts the staff here took notes of the fingers around his neck.” They all stiffened, having completely forgotten about Jeremy’s other aches from being Ryan's playmate. Ryan himself still had fingers splintered, something he should have thought about, having been using his uninjured hand to tend Jeremy. It went to show how much he was shaken by this.

“Dam, and you tallied his back and all too. That can’t be explained away as some rough lovin.” Gavin pointed out and Ryan glared at him harshly. Michael cursed and pulled himself from Geoff’s grip, crossing his arms and staring out the window.

“OK how’s this.” Gavin suggested after a minute of thoughtful silence, “Jeremy was kidnapped? You paid the ransom, got him back, was leaving a the shady area when, horrible luck you have, someone tried to mug you and Jeremy got shanked.” The gents save Ryan were nodding slowly, Ryan busy cursing at himself for leaving evidence on Jeremy of their unorthodox relationship.

“Ok that might work. Gavin you go with him, help smooth it over.”

“Smooth it over? I know how to talk to cops Geoff.” Ryan said defensively.

“No, you know how to gut pigs Ryan. Don’t tell me if they asked you if you put your hands on Jeremy, you wouldn’t kill them with their own guns.”

“I wouldn’t kill them, no.” Ryan pointed out and Gavin cocked an eyebrow at Alex who gave a heartless smile.

“Ryan, the loophole guy.” He said and they laughed a little sadly, all knowing that Jeremy would have been the one to crack that joke.

Had he been awake.

“Can we just get to doing something? Michael begged, turning back to the group, eyes sliding from Geoff to Jeremy. Alex nodded but made no motion to move instead asking, “Has anyone called Trevor or Matt?”

Guilty looks from everyone but Ryan, Ryan instead looking possessively at Jeremy, purposely not wanting Jeremy previous lovers here. Geoff groaned feeling like an asshole as Alex glared at him.

“Seems I’m not the only family, you failed too notified.” He pointed out testily and Geoff let him have the small victory.

“Who cares? He’s not B team anymore.” Ryan pointed out and Alex looked at him disapprovingly.

“Ryan...”

“No Al. Jeremy is our man now. He’s one of us. We shouldn’t be worried about those guys getting their feelings hurt. We need to get moving finding the asshole that put Jeremy here.”

“Gavin, maybe you and Ryan should get the cop off our asses huh? We just need a little breathing room until he can be shifted.” The awake lads and Ryan focused on their boss quickly.

“Shifted? The fuck do you mean shifted?” Michael demanded and Alex answered for Geoff.

“When we got to city limits I put in a call to Lindsay to put together a medic set up where Caleb can care for Jeremy in one of our safe spaces. It’ll be easiest for us if these guys can run the tests but let’s face it, if we haven’t already been recognised, we will soon.”

Michael stomped forward, pointing at Alex accusingly while Ryan gave a small-frustrated growl, tipping his head and touching his forehead to Jeremy’s. He had really let the ball slip, none of them were thinking clearly except for Alex.

“How is anyone going to connect us to, well us?!”

“Please Michael. Geoff has got the most recognisable moustache in Los Santos. Coupled with me at his side, I think alot of people can put two and two together. Then you never take off that jacket, ever. I just thank Christ that we managed to stop Gavin from wearing that stupid parachute bag.”

“You're stupid Al!” Gavin shot back but was ignored by everyone.

“So I’ve come up with a backup plan in case Jeremy needs more time to heal here then we can give him.” Ryan looked deranged when he growled over Jeremy’s body at Alex.

“We’ll give him as much time as he fucking needs.” He threatened and Alex put up his hands.

“I know Ryan, I’m just saying we’ll give him that time in our territory.” Geoff walked over putting a hand on Alex’s shoulder, showing a united front against the angry interrogator.

“Alex’s right Ryan. Jeremy stays with us. We’ll take care of him. We take care of our own.” Ryan relented slightly, turning away and blinking back tears they all pretended not to see. Gavin stood up and laid a hand on Ryan’s arm.

“Come on rye bread. Let’s send the pigs away then we start finding these soon-to-be dead wankers.” Ryan looked long at Jeremy before he started to move away with Gavin, his sense of duty starting to return. They left for the nurses’ station to inform them he was ready to give a statement. Alex got up with a long sigh and leant in, kissing Jeremy’s forehead.

“We love you Lil’J. Get well soon ok?” he murmured and turned to Michael, nodding at the door.

“Shall we?” He asked and Michael unfolded his arms.

“Let’s do this.” He agreed and fell in beside Alex to leave only to pause at the door and look back to the bed. He said nothing however, turning back and brushing by Alex who gave Geoff a knowing look then caught up with the Lad. That left Geoff a moment alone with Jeremy, coming to sit at the protective space by his side.

“Ah Lil’J... I never did tell you about Ray did I?” Geoff said softly, looking at the youngest member of their crew, his eyes still shut, “Yeah. Seems we’re unlucky in snipers. Between you and me, I don’t think we could stand another Lad leaving us. I mean, ray wanted to go but still...” He shook his head and leant forward, clasping his hands together.

“You need to wake up dude. You really do. I promised you all, I’d lead you to the top of this town. I can’t do that if your gonna laze on your ass all day.” There was no change, Jeremy still breathed in and out but the machines measured nothing but the steady beat of his heart.

“Alright kiddo. If you want a quick nap that’s fine. I got to call your B team buddies anyway. Trevor and Matt are-“ He fell silent as Jeremy gave a twitch of his hand, a matching twitch turning his mouth down in a frown.

“Jeremy?!” Geoff said urgently, grabbing the hand that had moved and searching his face for any sign, “Jeremy? Can you hear me?” he asked, hope surging inside him. Jeremy lay still once more and only the reading on the machines bearing any proof that something had happened.

“Jeremy, It’s Geoff. Lil’J? Oh fuck me, what was I saying...” he searched his mind for what could have set Jeremy off and remembered what he had been saying moments ago.

“Ah, B team! That’s right I’m going to call them and let them know where you are. Trevor can come-“ there it was again, another twitch, Geoff feeling the movement in his own hand.

“Trevor.” He tested the water and Jeremy responded again with a small twitch of finger and of face.

“Trevor and matt. Did you need them here? I’ll call matt right now.” He pulled out the phone one handed, hitting matt’s number first since it came first. He put it too his ear, watching Jeremy for more signs of life.

“Matt you stupid fuck! Answer your god dam phone!” Geoff snapped into the voicemail when it ran out and tried Trevor instead. He gave a growl of frustration when that also went to voicemail.

“Jeremy is in hospital and you two idiots are fired if you don’t call me the fuck back pronto!” Jeremy had gone still again and Geoff tried to rouse him with his friend’s names, this time to no avail.

He hit the nurse call button, the kind one from earlier entering. He told her about Jeremy twitching and she set to work, checking everything adjusting things he didn’t understand and smiling at him, assuring him it was a good sign. Geoff waited until she had gone, making him promise to call if Jeremy started to shift again before he sat down, trying both of Jeremy’s brothers again.

When he got nothing he called Lindsay.

“You have a Go boss man.” She answered and he immediately asked if she knew where Trevor and matt were.

“Ah, well I called them about Jeremy last night, they were pretty cut up about the whole thing-“

“You called them?!” Geoff was surprised and he heard the disapproval in Lindsay’s voice at his tone.

“Well yeah. When I recruited them, they came as a package deal. I figured with one hurt the others would want to know.”

“Right, right, sorry. Just I didn’t even think about it and I thought I’d have to tell them today only the stupid idiots aren’t answering their phones.”

“Course not, I sent them out to get supplies for Caleb’s Clinic.”

“That’s not what were calling it.”

“Yes it is, get used to it. Anyway, Trevor worked up some magic and got them into a hospital as staff overnight, they should be there now, Matt did say it might take a bit, medical equipment is bulky and kinda hard to stuff in a pocket and walk out with.” Geoff groaned in frustration and looked to Jeremy who had gone back to his peaceful sleep.

“Well when Matt and Trevor,” he scoured Jeremy’s face for any change, “come back, send them here.” Now Lindsay sucked in a breath on the line, her voice trembling.

“Is Lil’J...”

“No, linds he’s fine. Well a coma or whatever but so far seems to be stable or whatever the docs call it. Hey, you got Mica with you right?”

“Course I do. She’s my main girl.” A small voice from further away yelled out a bright hello to him.

“Ok, just make sure she stays close alright? I’m not sure what the fucks going on here, but stay safe.”

“You too Geoff.”

 

Just as she hung up from Geoff, Lindsay got another call. The screen showed Alex’s name popping up and she sighed as Mica leaned back on her chair across from Lindsay’s desk.

“Popular girl.” She said and Lindsay poked out her tongue as she answered.

“Heya Alex, how was the holiday?”

“It was great right until my buddy got shanked.” Michael’s voice filled the line and she sat up a little straighter, mica cocking an eyebrow at her.

“Hey, Michael. What you going calling off Alex’s phone?”

“Big guy insisted on driving. Boring as fuck, you know there’s such thing as a speed limit?”

“I’ve heard tell of the legend yes.”

“Well anyways, we’re heading out to the docks, poke around, and look for clues detective style. Has Gavvers called yet?”

“No he hasn’t.” She flipped Mica the finger, the skilled assassin acting like a school girl making a kiss face and batting her eyes mockingly as Lindsay slowly turned as red as the flames she enjoyed.

“Well, he’s gonna call soon, thought I’d save some time and get in first. He needs the feeds for the docks around pack up time.” Lindsay was confused but nodded, even though Michael couldn’t see her.

“Ok, that’s real doable and I feel like a jackass for not thinking of it sooner, but why call me? Andy worked that part of the job, could have called him directly.”

“Well I don’t like talking to morons alright? Fucking thought I’d talk to someone who won’t fucking stammer every other word.” Lindsay brightened again, a smile tugging at her lips as she listened to the fiery tempered man start to work himself up.

“Well, I’ll let him know and we’ll be ready on our side to transfer whatever you need.”

“Thanks Linds you’re a champ.”

“Don’t I know it!” a little silence fell as the two waited on the other to finish the call. Mica made another kiss face and Lindsay threw her mouse at her.

“What was that?” Michael asked, concern in his voice.

“Oh nothing, just some idiots in the office.” She blew off mica grinning at her mockingly.

“Oh, ok. Well, I got to go. So well, just take care of yourself alright?”

“I will.”

“Stay close to Mica.”

“God, yes moooommm.”

“Fuck you tuggey!”

“Fuck you too Jones.” She said affectionately and the line cut as Michael laughed back.

 

The cops had been hard customers to sell but between Gavin's golden tongue and the sincere devastated expression Ryan could summon, they managed to convince them. This was Los Santos and kidnappings happened all the time, most people not bothering to call the police, just paying the ransom. They refused to elaborate which gang, citing safety, and the police didn’t press too hard, the lower crews not being their priority anyway.

When they had returned, Geoff had told Ryan that Jeremy had showed positive signs he may wake then left with Gavin, leaving them alone once more. He had also given Ryan a shoulder holster to go under his jacket, now with a sleep under his belt, Ryan would be the best choice for guarding Jeremy alone. Everyone else had to go in pairs from now on.

He took his place at Jeremy’s side and moved the book Alex had brought for him off the seat. He checked no one was around then he picked up Jeremy's hand, mindfull of all the connections running to the lads body and put that hand to his forhead. He felt the callouses from the rifle and the softness of his limp fingertips. Ryan tried to visualise the light they both could see, tried to see it in his minds eye, coming back into his aprentice.

"Jeremy." he started slowly, voice pitched just for the snipers ears, "this crew is the closest i got to a family. I love all those guys, michael, gavin are idiot little brothers. Alex’s like well, like a mum but also like an older brother. Geoff's definitly the Dad." He let out a breath and moved jeremy's fingers to his lips, murmering against the skin as he watched the lad sleep.

"Jeremy. there's no one else like me. Even in our little group of messed up humans. And i know we're messed up. I may be insane but i'm not stupid. We are all fucked up. But you Lil'J. You fit me." Ryan thought about how his life had gotten better since he found Jeremy was the same as him. Without realising it, the gent had been starting to spiral down into a world without feeling. Only his kills were stirring anything within him. He had been considering aproaching geoff about putting Ryan down before he hurt the crew just for the thrill. Then Jeremy had begun taking an interest in Ryans work.

"Jeremy, I need you here. Please. Jeremy..." the serial killer blinked and felt tears roll down his cheeks. "Please Jeremy. Stay. Your mine Jeremy...and I am yours."

 

Voices whispered in the light where Jeremy floated:

Why are you here Jeremy...

Plain to see Jeremy, in the eyes...

Please, please let me go...

Team Lads for life...

Stop, no please...

You guys are so soft with me...

Jeremy back off man...

Meet Lil’J now part of the big leagues...

We’re the dream team...

Is he big J now...

Stop please stop...

Useless, your useless...

Dance with me...

Oh god please don’t let him hurt me...

Fuck you Jeremy...

Your Mine boy...

Be mine Jeremy...

We have bad luck in snipers...

I’m gonna punch your face in...

Jeremy please...

You fucking traitor...

I got a gun pointed at your boyfriend...

Come back to me...

Do you see?

 

Jeremy.... I need you....

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok we are gonna get back into it next chapter, things will speed up again (in story, not uploads sorry as mentioned above) Questions? sudgestions even guesses? leave in the comments! thank you to my new and old kudosers and a big thank you to my regular commentors too i'm trying to get these out for you guys :)  
> see you next chapter!


	19. Decided

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 'We've been made'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, your welcome lol ok so really am gonna be busy for a bit, but hey i finished it, looked it over then went 'screw it' so heres the next chapter match earlier then planed  
> Your welcome ;)

In the golden haze where friends, family, victims and enemies all blended together in a swirl of sound, only one voice stuck out.

_Jeremy_

_We’re the same_

_Your mine_

The haze was so soft, so warm. Here, floating within it wasn’t the pleasurable pain it could be in life. There was no straining, no pressure, no crushing need to use it. Just peace. But the voice would not leave off.

_Stay with me..._

_Come back..._

_I am yours..._

Now Jeremy was paying attention. All his life, people had told him who he was, had taken him for their own. Never had anyone offered themselves to him. Told him, that they belonged to him.

_Jeremy... I need you..._

He had reached the deciding point, he could continue to float here in the glow

Or

Warm arms, hand bloodied, wrapped around his waist, a blonde head pressed into his cheek, lips murmuring against his skin, teeth outlined in Jeremy’s own blood.

_I love you..._

He let the dark being draw him back down, going willingly back to his body.

Ryan...

 

 

 

 

 

Jeremy’s head felt thick and fuzzy. Everything had that slightly floaty feel to it and he automatically clenched his hands trying to ground himself only to find his hand was being held in a large warm grip that shifted in his when his hand twitched, strength not responding to the order. Sound was muffled and soft for a moment, and then he winced as a sharp ringing went through his mind, petering off into a hum that was almost soothing. It took a moment to remember how to work his eyes but he managed it, turning his head ever so slightly to bring the figure by his bedside into focus.

“By the bedside. Cliché.” He murmured voice hoarse, tongue thick. Ryan was swimming into focus; those intense blue eyes the first thing to become sharp in his vision. Ryan’s mouth was moving but it was taking a moment for Jeremy’s brain to convert the sound into words so instead he just took in his partner. He had a vague memory of Vagabond, made up face close to his, ordering him to keep his eyes open.

The vagabond had looked frightened.

That can’t be right.

Jeremy’s eyes had drooped and soon he had drifted off again. Ryan still stood, leant over, one hand on Jeremy’s face the other his hand, giving small shakes.

“Jeremy? Jeremy?! Please, Hey!” his voice got sharp and he tried to calm himself as with that last hey, Jeremy opened his eyes again, trying to see Ryan’s face.

“I’m right here Jeremy. Are you with me?”

“Cheese...” Jeremy murmured and gave a hoarse feeble cough. Ryan cast about then saw what might help, pouring Jeremy a sip of water into a paper cup and placing it to his lips.

“Here, drink. It’s water.” He informed the sniper who obediently sipped it, water coming from the side of his mouth into his beard but managing to wet inside his mouth.

“Is that better? Jeremy?”

“Swiss cheese.” Jeremy said a little stronger now and Ryan wondered how extensive the brain damage might be, his stomach bottom dropping out at the thought. That was until, Jeremy’s eyes gave that cheeky twinkle and he pulled his lips into a smile.

“I’m Swiss cheese rye. Full of holes.” He said and Ryan gave a relived laugh, his own eyes welling with happiness to hear his good old playmate talk. Without thinking about it, he gave Jeremy a hard kiss on the lips, his hand sliding to its familiar place, fisting the back of Jeremy’s hair.

“Don’t you ever scare me like that again!” he demanded lowly against Jeremy’s lips. Then when he gave a small moan of discomfort, Ryan backed off, hands petting at him.

“Ah, shit! I’m sorry, are you ok? How do you feel? Christ I need to call the doctor.”

Jeremy lifted a hand off the bed half an inch, trying to touch Ryan who was unsure how to be right now. Some buried human instinct told Ryan he had to take Jeremy’s hand again, softly.

“No, rye. No. Doctors. What... What happened?” Jeremy asked, blinking and starting to look around, noticing the machines, he was hooked into, the IV dripping down and the fact Ryan was the only one here, as Ryan himself no less.

“What do you remember?” asked Ryan uneasily, his relief now running into concern once more.

“Well, I remember getting got. Ah, Michael was yelling at me. Then you were yelling at me. God so much yelling...” Ryan was memorizing Jeremy’s face, how every little muscle moved, the small things that gave the face life. Jeremy’s eyes were blazing to him, the brightest he had ever seen before.

He had no desire to snuff that light out.

“Is everyone else-“

“Everyone’s fine. We didn’t get there in time to stop the sniper. They bailed before we could get to you.” Ryan informed him and Jeremy gave a sigh that sounded like relief.

“So I’m the only shish kebob huh?” he asked and gave a small chuckle, then squeezing his eyes shut.

“Are you in pain? I can call a nurse.”

“No. Don’t. Tell me what the story is first.”

Ryan obediently filled Jeremy in on their cover, describing the supposed torture he went through until the imaginary ransom was paid. Jeremy nodded his chin, conserving energy but his hand was as tight as he could make it. When he had told Ryan what he planned to say, he got his boyfriend to hit the call button.

 

Ryan paced the room, waiting for Jeremy to get back cursing that he had hit the call button. Almost immediately, they had wheeled Jeremy away for tests, wanting to make sure his system was recovering properly. Or as Jeremy, himself put it,

“Making sure I still got a full deck of cards to play with.”

The day had been a long one, plenty of time to think over what had happened, and what it meant.

It meant someone was going to die. Horribly and slow. Seeing Jeremy wake even for a short period had relived much of the worry that had been crushing the serial killers chest. In this second, he felt so very...human.

A nurse came in about ten minutes later, smiling at Ryan. His return smile wasn’t even forced as he told her of Jeremy’s brief waking, the woman nodding and tapping her clipboard.

“That’s a very good sign Mr King, and why I’m here” she said brightly, “I’m happy to tell you his vitals are looking well too.”

A warm glow that had nothing to do with killing came on inside him.

“Oh, we have two of Mr. Jackson’s friend here. I’m sorry but I can only allow one other besides yourself in at a time.”

“The one with the silly moustache please.” Ryan asked, pleased Geoff had come to see them so quickly. He didn’t know whom he had bought with him, but he hoped they had news on who had done this. Just because he was feeling warm and fluttery about Jeremy, being alive didn’t mean he wasn’t going to grind whoever had done it through a meat packer.

“Ah, neither had a moustache. One had a blonde beard though. A Mr. Stream and a Mr axel? Do you know them?” a wave of cold flushed through him, unnoticed as he turned on the Georgia charm for the nurse.

“Yes, they are close friends of Jason and I. I’ll go talk to them myself. Give them the good news.” He smiled widely and she smiled back, a little hypnotised by that charming voice.

“Ok then, they're in the waiting room, just down the hall and to the left of the elevators. Maybe you should go have something to eat. It’s got to be near dinner time you know?” she suggested kindly, blushed when he took her hand, and kissed it.

“Thank you so much. For everything. Please let me know if there’s any change? You should have my cell on file.”

“O-of course.” She stammered and he went out, following the instructions, he had been given. He found them in the waiting room, the place empty except for the three of them, two other strangers and a nurse who was speaking to the strangers.

Matt was seated, head in his hands as Trevor paced back and forth in front of him. When he saw Ryan, he jerked to a halt, matt looking up to see what had caused it. Ryan fought down a wave of irritation. These were Jeremy’s brothers, these timid little mice that made the dark voice inside squirm with anticipation of the hunt. Even though they have seen his face, know his true name, they were still too afraid of him to mouth it.

How did Jeremy put up with such weakness?

“How is he?!” Trevor stepped forward right away, surprising Ryan. Ok maybe not as weak as he originally considered.

“He’s doing fine. He woke up just a few minutes ago.” Matt stood up, blood draining from his face. Interesting.

“What did he say?”

Even more interesting.

“Cracked a lame joke, had a drink then off for tests.” a flash of relief over both those faces quickly hidden. Ryan could almost taste information withheld. His hands tingled wanting to milk them into singing for him but he restrained himself.

“They wouldn’t let us in. We need to see him.” Trevor said and matt moved to right behind him, both ready to walk by Ryan. He fixed them with a freezing look and shook his head.

“I don’t think so.” He said mildly, “He’s being tested and there’s only two at a time allowed in.”

“Ok, fine, we’ll wait with him, I’m sure Geoff needs you.” Trevor said firmly causing Ryan's opinion of him to rise slightly even as he spiked his ire.

“No. I’m staying with him. You can come back later.”

Matt looked determined as he spoke but his voice betrayed him with a crack.

“We’re his family. You can’t keep us out.”

Ryan grinned at him, the grin he liked to give people that made them think of teeth and sent shivers up spines.

“I think you’ll find that I can.” He took a step closer and the two drew together but didn’t back down, “See, Jeremy is mine. Mine. I’m his beloved, caring boyfriend, sat by his side all night, even shed a tear or two when I thought the nurse ‘wasn’t looking’” he chuckled at his own manipulation of the kind hearted people who had ducked in and out into the room.

“They’re gonna keep out who I tell them to keep out, so I can stop you without laying a finger on you.” He took another two-steps, standing eye to eye with Trevor, locking in on his patented intimidation look, making sure the man saw the madness in his eyes as he continued smiling and talking in a casual tone.

“We all know I could stop you in messier ways too.” Trevor’s eye watered and he tried but in the end he ducked his head, looking down and too the side, unable to stand Ryan's expression. He flinched hard, Matt grabbing his arm, pulling him back slightly as Ryan lifted a sudden hand, gesturing smugly.

“Except it. Jeremy is mine. Mine alone. I protect what’s mine.” He said low and dangerous. Trevor’s eyes welled with tears and matt gave Ryan a watery glare of his own as he backed them both up. Ryan kept his eyes on them, all the while smiling as if they were the closest of friends. He watched them leave, not another word spoken and he gave a little scoff of satisfaction.

Jeremy had no family but main crew now.

He made his way back to Jeremy’s room to find he was back again, talking softly with a nurse. When Ryan filled the doorway, they looked to him and Jeremy smiled. Ryan came all the way in, taking his seat again and Jeremy grasped his hand, their calluses from handling weapons for years fitting into one another like puzzle pieces.

“So I was just telling Jason here that he should stay here for another few nights.” The nurse said and Ryan looked from Jeremy’s pale face with his dark eyes shining to the nurse. She smiled at the sweet couple, so pleased to see this kind young man had such a beautifully committed boyfriend to help him through this.

“The doctor will be by soon now with your results but if you feel tired, don’t try to stay up. Your body has been through a massive shock and sleep will give you time to heal. You also need to stay in bed, no walking around or sudden movements understand?” she said firmly, turning the young man’s attention onto herself. He nodded cautiously, still feeling a bit dizzy.

“Ah, when will the world stop moving?” he asked after he stilled his head, putting a hand to it. The nurse smiled at him, a soft hand on his arm. Luckily, she missed the murderous flash across the boyfriends face, just concerned with her patient.

“You lost alot of blood. Even with a transfusion, your body is trying to recover from that shock. If you’re too dizzy, call one of us and we’ll come but don’t be alarmed if you feel a little bit woozy. You also have some painkillers in your drip, which also could cause some disorientation.”

“I’ll keep an eye on him.” Ryan assured her and she turned her smile on him.

“You have such a dedicated boyfriend Jason. Has been here all night. We couldn’t kick him out if we tried.” She said and Jeremy looked to Ryan, who just gave that smug look back at him.

“No they couldn’t if they tried.” He echoed, the double meaning clear to Jeremy if not to the sweet nurse who patted Jeremy’s arm and bustled out leaving them be. Ryan looked to make sure the door was closed then leaned in closer, moving his free hand to trace Jeremy’s face.

“So, who did this?” he asked, suddenly serious and Jeremy’s eyes slid away, looking down at the sheets.

“How long have I been out?” he asked instead of answering, Ryan frowning but allowing it considering how close his apprentice had come to death.

“Well you went quiet around eleven last night. You were in and out for a bit then by the time you got here, you were unconscious. Since then as far as I know, you woke up about,” he checked his phone, noting a missed call from Geoff, one from Alex and a few messages from the lads, “twenty five minutes ago.”

“I remember that. You were guarding me.” He smiled at Ryan and the killer felt that human flush of warmth again, brushing it to the side now he knew Jeremy was recovering.

“I guard what’s mine.” He said offhandedly. Jeremy flinched at that, Ryan furrowing his brows in confusion.

“What is it?” he asked, Jeremy touching his head again.

“Just-just still dizzy I guess.” He said but this time Ryan wasn’t going to let him slide.

“No. You flinched. You don’t flinch from me.” It’s part of the attraction Ryan felt for the sniper. He could and did hurt Jeremy but the sniper never ever showed fear. Respect yes but not fear. Ryan loved that strength in his partner and hated this show of weakness. He could stand him being injured that was fine, Ryan has been injured before himself. But not scared weakness.

“I just had a weird ass dream ok? I think I’m allowed that since I near bleed to death.” The sharpness soothed Ryan, that steel what he wanted from Jeremy. He relaxed once more nodding his head.

“Ok, I’ll give you that. Remind me to tell you about the time I got shoot one day.”

“Shoot?”

“Shot. You know what I meant.” Jeremy was laughing weakly then groaned laying back into his bed, which was put upright so he was still sitting up. Ryan shifted a bit closer and the younger man shifting so he was looking to Ryan from his pillow.

“So what happened?” Ryan asked again and Jeremy looked away, closing his eyes and putting a soft hand to his side, over the terrible wound that had almost killed him.

“I was talking with Gavvers then I heard him approaching. I only heard one so I alerted Gav then I hid, gonna ambush them. He came up the stairs, and I didn’t recognise him.” Ryan furrowed his eye’s detecting a false note but unable to pinpoint what it would be. However, Jeremy was still talking so Ryan let him finish his story.

“He was standing over the other sniper so I was moving around the unit’s closing in to give him a little love tap so we could have a chat. Next thing I know I got a knife in my side, his god dam silent fucking friend had stabbed me. I think I yelled out and he knocked out the lights before I could retaliate. Then I was here.” Jeremy sounded furious as he described the attack, His eyes flickering open and glaring out the window, fingers twitching as if for a neck or a weapon. That part Ryan approved of but he needed more information if he was to track down these people.

“Can you describe them?” he asked and Jeremy shook his head cautiously, not wanting to make the world dip again. He leant his head back into the pillows, closing his eyes.

“No. I’m so tired. Think the doctor will be here soon?” He asked. He opened his eyes in surprise when Ryan leant in and kissed him softly. When the gent pulled away, he looked at him confused.

“I’m just- Just happy your ok.” Ryan admitted the words being stuck in his throat, unused to voicing such petty human nonsense. Jeremy tilted his head in a beckoning motion, Ryan helpless to obey him for once, bringing their lips together once more. There was warmth in the lad’s lips once more, sending tendrils of desire down Ryan’s spine. Jeremy smiled against his lips, then pulled back slightly and showed him the grin.

“So you are capable of actually being soft huh?” He teased and Ryan rubbed a hand through his hair ruefully, with a self-deprecating grin of his own.

“Don’t get used to it. I’ll do my best but it’s been awhile.”

“What since you didn’t bruise with every touch?”

“...Yeah...”

Jeremy chuckled and he reached for Ryan's hand, the older man taking it before Jeremy expanded too much effort. Still it seemed to have worn Jeremy out, just their small talk, and his eyes closing again a small smile on his face as he gave a small squeeze of Ryan’s hand.

“Stay with me?” He asked softly, not opening his eyes. Ryan leant forward, folding his other hand over the one in his grip.

“Of course.”

After a hour and a half, the doctor still hadn’t come and the nurse had likewise been absent. Ryan checked Jeremy was sleeping soundly then gently extracted his hand from the lad’s and went to the door. Before he walked out, his dark self sent a spike of warning to his brain making him pause and listen. Through the door, he heard muffled talking and the sounds of things moving.

He pressed his ear to the door crack, opening it the tiniest amount.

“No, take Mrs Steven down too ward three.”

“But ward three is full.”

“Take her anyway. If the police are right, this ward is about to be a war zone carol, we got to get the patients out of here, quietly.”

“I just can’t believe that sweet couple is mixed up with that horrible crew.” Ryan ground his teeth as he listened to the nurses try to organise the evacuation of the ward as silently as possible.

“I know, but the police are going to do their best to save them.”

“Shouldn’t we move Jason too?”

“No, I don’t like it but this is a police operation. We have our instructions and we need to insure the safety of others first.”

“This is ridiculous. They can’t use our patient as bait!”

“Keep your voice down! Go help Eric with Stacy, she may cry, her parents are out getting coffee.”

Ryan closed the door having heard enough and started inspecting the small room for anything he could use or secondary options as he pulled his phone and called Geoff.

“We’ve been made.”

“Fuck.”

“I don’t know how or why yet but the wards being quietly emptied. From what I can hear, Jeremy and I are bait, they don’t suspect us as anything but victims.”

“Alright, Fuck. Ok, we’re gonna get you guys out of there pronto.”

“Jeremy’s been told not to walk around.”

“Then get him a god dam wheelchair. Do you want to leave him there longer?”

“I won’t risk his safety.”

“Listen to me Asshole. I’m your fucking boss remember? His too. So when I say get prepped I mean get fucking prepped. Now I don’t care if you want to wheel out the bed, you just be ready to move when you get the call, got me?”

“Yes, sir. FYI, it will be the bed.”

“Fucking fine, just be ready.” There was a short pause then Ryan's anger at Geoff ebbed when the boss asked softly, “How is Jeremy? Still talking?”

“He’s in a normal sleep now. We were waiting on the doctor but no one came by. That’s what alerted me to what’s up.”

“Alright, let me know if anything changes, someone will be in contact soon.” The line disconnected and Ryan pocketed his phone once more. With infinite regret, he woke Jeremy, shaking his shoulder and patting a cheek.

“Wha? Whassup?” Jeremy came alive and Ryan gave him another kiss just because he could before slipping into his professional Vagabond persona.

“Cops are coming to stake out the ward. They think were victims of our own crew. “

“We are so busted aren’t we?” Jeremy asked, trying to sit up further and wincing. Ryan was checking out the window view, memorizing the roads out of the hospital exit. He threw a nod at Jeremy, coming back and inspecting what was what on his Lad.

“Fuck, I have no idea what you need here and what you don’t.” He noted, too many machines to make moving Jeremy simple. Jeremy looked himself, reading the labels, frowning.

“Ok, so I want that one.” He said pointing to his painkiller IV with a joking smile. Ryan rolled his eyes and pulled forth his phone once more.

“Caleb here.”

“Caleb, were about to move Jeremy, you know what’s up?”

“Yeah, I’m ready to receive on this end.”

“Ok, well Jeremy is hooked up to like twenty things here, He can’t need all of them right?” The next five minutes was Ryan describing the set out, Caleb asking for details then coaching Ryan on how to disconnect monitors without setting off alarms and telling him what was absolutely essential. By the end of the call, Jeremy was now mobile, only two IV bags needed, everything else was useful but not the bare necessity.

“So, I’m not gonna like die without all that other stuff am I?” Jeremy asked as Ryan set him up to be moved. The gent repeated his boyfriends question to their backyard doctor, his license revoked when it came out he had cheated on the final test.

“Nah, not immediately.” Caleb reassured, unable to see Ryan's eye’s flash dangerously, looking up at the lad he couldn’t live without.

“That’s not comforting Caleb.” He warned and Caleb laughed.

“He’ll be fine, now, if that’s all, I’ll get ready here. Besides, if the news is any indication then you’ll be leaving soon. Oh, whatever you do, DO NOT let him pop those stiches!” Ryan pointed at the TV mounted in the corner of the room, tossing the remote onto Jeremy’s chest. Jeremy turned it on, starting to switch channels until good old reliable Weasel news came up.

“I won’t let him off the bed Caleb, trust me.” Ryan signed off then looked up at the TV, Jeremy starting to chuckle at what was going on.

 

-Pandemonium in downtown Los Santos, as a the crew known as FUNHAUS holds a mall hostage. (James and Joel are clearly seen racing the animated animals for children to ride on during shopping around a circle of terrified customers from a TV feed, both armed. Bruce walks into view, holding his own weapon over his shoulder, gesturing at them then pointing at the camera. James laughs then points his gun at the feed before it becomes static.) It is unknown at this time what the demands are but the police have surrounded the area. After last week’s car chase, Police commissioner has released this statement.

‘We are urging citizens to stay inside and abide by the suggested curfew of ten o’clock for their own safety. We are giving our lives to protect the citizens of Los Santos, unfortunately this means many a brave officer has passed and takes time to replace.’-

 

“Whelp, guess they have their hands full with Funhaus.” Jeremy pointed out and Ryan nodded seriously.

“I think we’re going to owe them one hell of a favour.” As if on Cue, Ryan's phone rings in his hand, he picks up as Jeremy gestured him closer to the bed. He tried to concentrate on Geoff but it was hard as Jeremy started to pat him down.

“Ok, time to go. We’re coming to your floor, be there in five. Can you tell me whose left?” Jeremy found what he was looking for, pulling out Ryan's large hunting knife out from an intimate area, one eyebrow raised at him. Ryan just pressed a quick kiss to his forehead then told Geoff to be quiet as he went to the door.

There was silence and when he risked a peek, no one was around, not even at the nurses’ station. More sinister, the lights were dim, and from his place, Ryan couldn’t quiet see both ends of the hall without sticking his head out. He closed the door and went back to the bed.

“Yeah, it’s a complete lock down. I don’t see or hear another soul. They got to be just waiting on you guys to show up here.”

“Dam. Ok well, Michael and Gavvers are coming up, Alex’s waiting downstairs, we should have managed to procure a ambulance. The security system is also killed so as long as there’s no survivors you should be safe to be weapons free without compromising yourselves.”

“What about you?”

“I’m helping acquire an ambulance.” He heard Geoff say smugly, a silenced shot sounding then the shifting of a body and a slam of a door, “So wait for the signal then get Jeremy down here pronto.”

“What’s the signal?” Geoff sighed and Ryan heard what he didn’t really want to hear.

“It’s team nice Dynamite...What do you think the signals going to be?”

Ryan came back to Jeremy and traded up the gun Geoff had slipped him for his knife. To Jeremy’s objection, he said simply, “You clear the path, I’ll drive us through. If anyone’s within stabbing distance of you it’s a little too late.”

He worked out the brakes on the bed and pulled down the IV bags from their hooks, laying them across Jeremy’s legs carefully. Then they heard gunfire and the faraway sound of people screaming. They also heard manic laughter and two familiar voices raised in mirth.

Jeremy slid the gun out of sight and was just in time, two uniformed officers bursting in then pulling up short to see Jeremy already mobile and Ryan behind the bed.

“Thank god, I got him ready to move! They’re here aren’t they?” Ryan put fear into his voice, intimately aware of the many different kinds having had fear sung to him for years now. He went for a panicked slash determined fear, the kind a civilian would have when wanting to protect their boyfriend.

The left side officer recovered first, nodding and gesturing the bed forward.

“We got to get you guys to safety, somehow they made it behind our blockade. They came through a window...On the sixth floor!” The right side officer came and helped pull Jeremy’s bed to the door, the first officer, looking out and yelling clear. They pulled into the hall, more sounds of a gun battle sounding behind them. Ryan and Jeremy shared a quick look knowing why the lads had come in from the opposite end to the elevators.

Like herding frightened sheep.

They past more police, less than they expected, only two other pairs, taking cover around the rooms, waiting to ambush the guys. Obvious Funhaus had taken a chunk from their preparations. In under a minute, they were in the elevator. The officer hitting a lower floor button.

“Ok, we should be ok now-“ they didn’t finish their sentence, Jeremy blowing their brains onto the panel. Almost the same instant, Ryan had taken the other one into a hold, sliding his knife into the sweet spot in the back of the neck. They had angled it perfectly, nothing ending up on bed or person. Ryan hit the bottom floor button, overriding the door opening at second floor.

They hit the bottom and came out of the elevator running, breezing by staff and patients that were being evacuated. They blended in with the panic, making their way to the front where he saw Alex, costumed in ambo gear, turning away people, arguing with a doctor who was gesturing angrily. Ryan got up close behind the Doctor and Alex caught the body after Ryan slit their throat. He gently rested it against the wheel of the car, Ryan and Geoff, also costumed, his with a small red hole over the heart, already starting to load Jeremy into the back.

“What about Michael and Gavin” Ryan asked and Geoff grinned.

“Don’t worry, Lindsay’s got them covered.”

They locked down Jeremy’s bed into the ambulance and the Lad, concerned for his teammates spoke up.

“How exactly does Lindsay have them covered?” He asked, and Geoff paused before he could jump out to smile wildly at Jeremy and grab his foot, shaking it happily. Ryan took that moment to put in an earpiece as Geoff spoke to Jeremy.

“God it’s good to hear your voice Lil’J.” He said and Jeremy smiled back at him, knowing how much his boss would have been worried, “As for Lindsay. Well apparently, Michael knows a guy who knows a guy and long story short, there’s a Valkyrie waiting on the roof, so let’s fucking bail before a shitstorm of debris starts raining down on us.”

He jumped out after that and shut the doors, Ryan shifting so he could see out the windows, a special carbine in his hands. Jeremy gave a small groan when the ambulance started up and Alex skipped the tire over the dead body that had slumped with the movement.

“You all right?” Ryan asked quickly, concern looking out over Jeremy. Jeremy nodded and tipped his head back again, gently putting a hand to his side.

“Fine. Just wanna sleep to be honest.”

“Well you have nap, I don’t think anyone has put together we’re gone yet, all eyes on team nice dynamite and Phoenix.” Ryan observed, looking back out the window to where a Valkyrie was taking off, guns and rockets firing in all directions, knocking the police helicopters out of the sky.

“Like I can sleep with this noise going on.”

Ryan scoffed and said aloud to Jeremy, “Bad day to be a pig in los Santos. They still got Funhaus to deal with too.” There was no answer and Ryan looked back to find Jeremy had passed out once again. He shifted back towards Jeremy, holding on as the ambulance cut through traffic, using it’s lights for full advantage and grabbed hold of the lad to keep him as still as possible. He pressed his com quickly, tuning into the chatter as he watched Jeremy.

“Gavin you’re a fucking moron you know that?!” Michael raged, locking on the rockets and firing on the helicopters pursuing them while Lindsay flew them up.

“Wot? How was I meant to know the door would be locked?”

“BECAUSE THAT’S YOUR FUCKING JOB! THE FUCK DID WE GO DOWN USING THE WINDOW CLEANER FUCKING TRAY IF YOU HAD REMEMBERED TO FUCKING BRING THE DOOR EQUIPMENT YOU FUCK!”

Gavin pouted as he swung the mounted machine gun around, shredding through civilian cars and police vehicles alike.

“Now, now children, we can argue later.” Lindsay pointed out, tipping the Valkyrie forward sharply, avoiding the crashing of another Police helicopter, “this isn’t about you. It’s about drawing attention away from extraction team.”

“Doing a good job from where we’re standing too.” Geoff’s voice came over the coms, the sound of a siren behind it.

“You got company?” Lindsay asked of Geoff who swore quietly and ordered Alex to turn off the siren.

“No were fine here. Just wanted an excuse to break the speed limit without the pigs breathing down our necks.”

“How’s Lil’J holding up?” Michael asked, voice alot calmer now despite the havoc he was playing in the sky.

“He’s passed out actually.” Ryan came in and Michael grinned.

“Figures he’d sleep through the action.”

“If you weren’t being so boring, maybe he’d wake up.”

“Guy’s shut it, Ryan, is he ok?” Alex’s concern came through and Ryan was quick to reassure everyone.

“I think so, his stiches look good and the IVS are set up in what I think is the right spot.”

“If Lil’J got blood from someone who is taller, is he going to have a growth spurt now?”

“What kind of question is that Gavin?!”

“Cause of hormones and shit right? Ryan? That’s a thing isn’t it?”

Geoff sighed and rolled his eyes at Alex who was driving, leaving the area of combat, staying under the radar as Lindsay and her idiot cargo, drew the police in the opposite direction. With that, noise happening and Funhaus causing their own kind of distraction, no one noticed or cared about a missing ambulance or the bait they had been using to draw FAKEAH in.

Geoff reached out, putting a hand on Alex’s thigh comfortingly as they listened to the sound of bickering over the noise of gunfire and explosions that slowly faded as Lindsay started to lose their heat. At a red light, Alex idled and put a hand on Geoff’s after muting his mic. Geoff caught the movement and muted his own mic to look at him.

“After this, I think we got to have a proper talk.” He said mildly and Geoff agreed.

“I know. We’ll settle in Lil’J with Caleb then I’ll fill you in.”

“Think McCormick did this?” Alex asked, moving his hand briefly as they started off, replacing it atop Geoff’s once they were moving again.

“I don’t know. Seems like too much of a coincidence, Matt warning me then an attack in the same hour.” Alex slid a sideways look at his oldest friend, expression questioningly.

“Yeah, it would be. If the two weren’t related. How else would anyone know where you were? Who’s to say Jeremy was the focus of the attack? From what I saw, that was the best spot for a sniper to hide. Maybe Jeremy just got as unlucky as Matt’s sniper.” Geoff frowned, tugging at his moustache thinking.

“Ok, I think we are in the clear.” Lindsay reported and Geoff took his hand back, turning his mic on again.

“Dump the evidence then meet us at the clinic. We’ll go over everything there, have a proper talk to Jeremy and regroup.”

“Roger boss.”

“Righto Geoff.”

“We kinda have to go with you, we’re in the back of the ambulance remember?”

“Shut the fuck up Ryan you know he wasn’t talking to you.”

Geoff sighed and muted his mic’s again, affection for his little band of misfits filling him. They were all, eccentric sons of bitches but he loved them just the same. He looked to Alex who had a small smile playing in his Goatee as he listened to the crew talk back and forth, adding his own occasional comment but for the most part just soaking in the heist feel of the day.

Jeremy was going to be alright, the crew would be completely whole again.

Time to hunt down some assholes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So ah small note, i have nothing but respect for real life police, i kinda feel guilty here for how i had to write this but hey when the bad guys are the 'good guys' of your story, it's the way it's got to be. Police rock, they protect and serve and are real life heroes!  
> Ok so hope you enjoyed that, let me know and i'll see you in the next chapter!  
> Which will definetly not be tomorrow...  
> maybe  
> ;) lmao ;P


	20. Hunt is on

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I'm sorry."  
> "Get out."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess whats back, back again? tortures back, warn a friend...  
> yep the ahead has some more toruture discribed vividly. Theres some angst ahead too, like i may have accediently hurt my own heart writting it but it had to be done sorry, not sorry.  
> As allways read with cation, hope you enjoy!

Geoff stood outside the little decommissioned offices that have now been turned into a tiny clinic for Caleb to treat Jeremy. Lindsay had been on his ass for ages, Alex been backing her up about creating their own gang medical centre for a while. It just took Jeremy almost dyeing for Geoff to finally give the ok. He hadn’t liked the idea that any of his crew could be seriously injured, so he never wanted them to need a clinic.

He slipped his hand into his jacket pocket, pulling forth his emergency flask of whisky. He unscrewed the lid and had a deep gulp, looking out into the sparsely populated area, only a few cars on the road here in La Puerta. It made it perfect for the little out of the way set up they had going on.

Things had seemed grand when they escaped with Jeremy. They had gotten him out almost smoothly, a little hiccup involving Gavin forgetting equipment but it had ended with them all here, in the La Puerta Clinic, alive and safe. Now, two days later, Jeremy was running a high fever and was having hard time breathing. Michael, Trevor and Matt were out stealing supplies.

Gavin and Ryan were tag teaming a lead on who had done this.

“I thought I got all of it.” Alex said disapprovingly as he came out, seeing Geoff’s flask in hand.

“I’m the boss, I can fucking drink all I want.” Geoff said and defiantly took another mouthful. He handed it over when Alex gestured for it and took his own sip. He handed it back, both men leaning companionably side by side.

“Ryan will find them; I’ve never seen him so motivated.” Alex reassured, having the uncanny ability to know just what Geoff was worried about, “And Jeremy will be fine once the guys are back. Caleb said as long as they got the right antibiotics, Jeremy can still pull through.”

Geoff took another drink before speaking.

“I can’t keep my people safe Alex.” He admitted his voice hard and alcohol doing nothing to burn away the guilt thick inside him.

“You’re a moron sometimes Geoff.” Alex said and Geoff looked up at him, seeing those eyes behind the glasses looking at him, “We’re a fucking drug and gun running, heisting, motherfucking awesome crew in this town. You want a family that won’t get hurt? Open a florist shop. Otherwise just fucking deal dude.” Alex’s words were just what Geoff needed to hear but his actions were more telling, sidling closer and putting an arm around Geoff, taking the flask and having another companionable sip. He handed it back and Geoff shrugged.

“You ever think about Ray?”

“Course I do. From time to time. But he made his choice, and we gotta live with it.”

“I know, just… You don’t think everyone’s going to head that same way do you?” Geoff asked and Alex turned, pulling Geoff so the man was facing him, one hand on Geoff’s shoulder, the other his face.

“I’m not going anywhere, anytime soon.” Alex promised fiercely, “Michael and Lindsay seem to be starting a little something up so their gonna stick around. You know Gavvers loves us all too dearly to leave. And Ryan and Jeremy… well, where else are two crazy bastards gonna fit in so well?”

Geoff nodded, relief spreading over his features.

“I guess I am being a paranoid idiot huh?”

“If you weren’t I’d question your insanity.” Alex said mildly then pulled him in for a hug and a comforting kiss before Geoff reluctantly pulled away, straightening his suit and tilting his head at the door.

“Come on, let’s get back in. It’s cold as dicks out here.” He stopped putting a hand out, stopping Alex who had followed, “Wait, my ‘insanity’?”

Alex just laughed as they wandered through the abandoned building to Jeremy’s room.

Jeremy moaned, and flung a hand off his bed, which Lindsay dutifully tucked back in. Caleb was adjusting the antibiotics IV, Lindsay seating on a comfortable single seater couch next to Jeremy’s bed. The little office had been cleared to emulate a hospital room, machines monitoring Jeremy, IV stands with antibiotics and painkillers attached and a small counter with everything Caleb needed to treat and monitor Jeremy.

The small touches of home were the two single seater couches, one in the corner, and the other by the bedside. The pillows were Jeremy’s from home, the sheet in their crew colors. Jeremy himself had shed the hospital gown, dressed only in loose boxers and heavy bandaging around his mid section. The side of which was had little spots of yellow and red.

Jeremy groaned a thank you at Lindsay as she applied another cool pack to his forehead; the feeling was blessed relief, and his body almost forgetting what cool felt like. No matter the painkillers pumping into his veins, his side ached and itched horribly, thankfully he was too weak to fight anyone who batted his hands from his side. Worst of all was breathing, every breath sawed out of a sore throat, making him feel like he hadn’t taken a breath at all.

He wanted Ryan here.

He was glad Ryan was gone too.

He didn’t think he could hold onto his secrets right now and only Ryan would be smart enough to ask the right things.

Jeremy didn’t want the crew to avenge him. So he held in all words, not trusting himself to speak, just concentrating on his pain and his fogginess.

“How is he?” asked Alex when the two highest in their crew reentered the room. Caleb turned to look at them, then Jeremy.

“Not good.”

“Caleb!” Lindsay said sharply, anger on her face, “Jeremy you’re going to be fine. Did you lose your license for bad beside manner Dr Jackass?” Caleb smiled but his heart wasn’t behind it, rubbing the back of his neck and turning to Geoff.

“Look, it doesn’t matter what we say here. Jeremy isn’t going to understand us right now.”

“You said his chances are good! He was up talking to us yesterday!” Geoff snapped now, looking down at his young crewmember that was sweating and panting.

“Not that he said much of use.” Murmured Alex but was ignored.

“Look, Boss. This was a deep wound all right? Shit just got into him quick, took a highway straight from the outside to the very inside of his body. Now I’ll do what I can, but unless they boys come back soon with the specific antibiotics he needs, this band aid just ain’t gonna cut it.” He jabbed a finger at the almost empty IV bag that was slowly draining down into Jeremy’s arm.

“Some morphine wouldn’t hurt either. I’d kinda like him as still as possible but with his training, if I strapped him down, he’d fight it worse then what he’s doing now.” The look Geoff shot Alex was a giant ‘I told you so’ that Alex nodded too sadly.

“I’m sure the guys will pull through. They all love Jeremy. We all do.” Geoff said not sure whom he was trying to reassure but saying what they all wanted to hear. Personally, he hoped Gavin and Ryan were having a better time chasing their lead then he was watching Jeremy starting to spiral the drain once more.

 

Ryan was in full vagabond mode, Gavin dressed in his casual suit, leading the mercenary into the bar where they’re trail had lead them. The combination of the tire tracks along with the traffic cameras had pointed out that an elegy had been there the night Jeremy had been stabbed. Since everyone and their grandmothers drove an elegy since they had that stupid deal three years ago, it wasn’t much.

However, Gavin had run the tapes back and forth in the areas around Jeremy’s attack; four elegies were spotted within the correct period. One was driven by Hullum and Co, that one heading to, ironically, the same hospital Jeremy had ended up at. That would be suspicious but since Ryan had almost bled out their man, their sniper possibly having a concussion, maybe not so much.

One had their license plates check out, still noted down in case this lead didn’t pan out, but overlooked for now because some gang banger from Rancho wants to be driving his ‘I wish I was cool’ car around probably wasn’t professional enough to take on FAKEAH. Two had false plates, suggesting Illicit activates but this one came up higher on the list because, A) they had run every red light for as far as Gavin could track them and B) The car was painted in the White and Black colors of the crackerjacks. It also helped this bar was in Crackerjack territory.

From the moment Gavin swung wide the door, entering the establishment, the tension was on. There weren’t many people here at this time of day. Just two men in one booth, one wearing a bandanna, the other sporting a buzz cut, a woman tending bar and another woman shooting pool in her denim shirt and jeans combo, seemingly alone. Gavin swaggered in, putting his hands in his pockets and giving his winning smile. Vagabond was almost directly behind him, walking straight and tall, hands by his side, no weapon to be seen.

“Ello love, what’s your special for today?” The woman behind the counter was almost stereotypical, just on the down side of pretty, face caked in makeup and hair pulled back from her face. She looked from Gavin to the skull mask then back again.

“I’m sorry gent’s, I’m afraid I can’t serve you.” Gavin laughed and leant an elbow on the counter, giving a quick look around to make sure no one had left or joined the room.

“He’s the gent love, I’m just a lowly Lad trying to have a bev and catch up with a friend.” He told her happily and Vagabond shifted at his back, turning to face one of the men who were approaching from the booth, his friend behind him.

“What friend would meet you here Fake AH?” Gavin turned so both his elbows were on the counter, his back to the barkeep. He pulled his hands out of pockets in the same smooth roll cocking finger guns at buzz cut who had spoken.

“I’m guessing you are the friend I’m looking for Crackerjack. Am I right?” he clicked his tongue, pretending to shoot with his fingers as the two men stopped close to them. They eyed the two off and the first one spoke again.

“I think not. We are not friends. Now you need to leave our territory, now, or things get ugly.”

“I’d say they already are ugly. Ugly.” Ryan’s deep voice came out from under the mask, the skull tilting disturbingly at the men who looked furious at the insult. Gavin straightened up, waving his hands.

“Now, now, come on Vagabond. No need for name-calling. We just want to know who owns the flash Elegy you got hidden under tarps behind this, ah, classy, joint.” The men shuffled, fists clenching and eyes hard. The woman by the Dartboard was taking a few steps forward and the one behind the bar was edging to the side, her hands sliding under the counter.

Vagabond stayed staring at the two men confronting them as he slid a hand under his jacket, pulled out his AP and shot the Bartender in the head. By his side, Gavin pulled his own gun out, putting one foot forward, stance hard as he pointed the barrel at the talkative guys head. Vagabond flowed from the shot to another one, dead centre of the dartboard, startling the other woman into jumping, her fingers coming off the weapon at her belt.

“I wouldn’t do that sweetheart. I took a chance the Elegy didn’t belong to the bartender, I haven’t got high hopes it’s yours either.” Gavin cocked his head at his partner with his grin still wide.

“What he said. We want the driver. That’s all. We get them and we leave. Don’t be wankers, just give us the driver.”

Bandanna was staring at the blood splatter over the back of the bar, trembling.

“You fucke-“ he tried to yell, taking a step forward to swing at Vagabond but being brought up short by a shot in his chest. Blood oozed sickly out of the hole, Bandana looking up to Gavin who had dropped his smile in favor of a guilty grimace more akin to a boy who had dropped his mothers china then a man who had just ended a life.

“Whoops.” Gavin said holding his hands up in a shrug, gun still loose in his fingers. He heard one deep Vagabond sigh then the woman was screaming, a bullet in her gun arm and the Buzz cut was out cold, Vagabond lunging forward to smash his lights out with the butt of his gun. He bent over Buzz cut when the man fell, double checking he was out and waving a hand at the screaming woman.

“See if she’s knows anything useful and shut her up.” He ordered and Gavin spread his arms defensively, “Wot? I was defending you!”

“I didn’t say anything!” Vagabond turned with shoulders lifted to yell at Gavin.

“But you’re thinking it!”

“Just go shut her up will you? I got to secure this guy and hope he’s our driver.” Vagabond turned back to his job, dismissively leaving Gavin too grumble as he put his gun away and went over to the crying woman. He sighed, getting down and gagging a little as he shoved her hand away from the wound and put pressure on it himself, his body over hers.

“Oh calm down, would ya, your making this worse.” He squawked then cast about seeing napkins on a table, lunging up and grabbing the lot, shoving them into the dark hole in her arm.

“Oh toss!” he cried out as she thrashed, making him unbalance and falling to the side. Then Vagabond stepped by him, grabbing the woman by her buttoned up shirt one handed, picking her up and slamming her against the dart board, the darts that had been in there, falling around their feet.

“Shut up!” he roared and she started to whimper, her good hand pawing at the arm that had her pressed against the wall.

“Now, do you know anything about a white and black Elegy being in the los Santos port area around eleven o’clock four nights ago?” the leering skull was in her face, burning eyes boring into hers. Gavin got himself up and flicked his hands, face screwed up in disgust at his hands. He wandered off to clean them behind the bar, stepping easily over the slumped body as Ryan got what he needed from the crackerjack woman.

He gave a little squeal of happiness as he spotted the expensive collection of scotch, pocketing a bottle to take home to Geoff. The woman’s pitched voice fell quiet then there was another scream that petered off into whimpers. Gavin looked up and over the bar to see Ryan had bound the woman’s arm and let her slump down.

“We off then?” He asked and the skull nodded, giving a small grunt as he lifted the hefty buzz cut guy over his shoulders in a fireman carry. Gavin slid over the bar, landing a little unsteadily, taking a few hard steps forward. Vagabond sighed and even without seeing his face, Gavin knew Ryan was rolling his eyes at him.

“That was intentional. I meant to do that.”

“Yep, you meant to kill that asshole too I bet.”

“You killed the Barkeep!”

“That was a point that needed to be made! Not a potential informant!” Gavin scoffed as Vagabond placed the gang member into the boot, heading around to the passenger side of the car, waiting for vagabond to unlock his side.

“We got the guy didn’t we?” he questioned as his door popped open and he could get in. Once inside the dark tinted windows, Ryan pulled off his mask, brushing his the sandy blonde that had escaped from his ponytail back. He turned his eyes on Gavin who grinned at him, Ryan helpless but to shake his head and grin back.

“Your skill is stupid dumb luck Gav. Yeah, apparently this is our guy.”

“Why didn’t you kill that other woman?”

Ryan smiled at him, looking away from the road making Gavin nervous.

“I need to give people hope that they’ll survive an encounter with me. Gives more incentive to talk.”

He looked back out onto the road, Gavin nodding and looking out the window, pulling his phone out. Ryan felt affection for Gavin, he did and he’d take Gavin's dumb luck any day, but this time was personal. This man in the trunk might be the one who had almost taken his Jeremy away. If he found out that he had Jeremy’s attacker, Geoff could shoot him afterwards because he wasn’t stopping until this man was insane from the pain Ryan would inflict.

He wondered if Michael and B team had gotten Jeremy’s meds yet.

He wasn’t too worried as when he had left, Jeremy had a sheen of sweat and a little hoarse but sitting up and talking with everyone. Jeremy knew he was not allowed to die

 

“Thanks to whatever god you subscribe too, we got the stuff.” Matt said, holding up a IV bag triumphantly. Caleb rushed over, taking it delicately from his hands and setting about replacing it in the set up around Jeremy who had fallen blessedly unconscious. Only Alex was there at the moment, one hand holding Jeremy’s the other holding a book he had lowered when Matt had entered. Matt cocked a thumb at the door, eyes stuck on Jeremy’s fever filled face.

“Trevor and Michael are unloading the spares along with the fridges to keep them. Caleb should have a small stocked supply until we can organize some sort of trade instead of these raids.” Alex nodded and followed Matt eye then back to the lad.

“Hey, I kinda need to go to the bathroom. Mind watching him for me?” he asked kindly and the thief looked sharply at him and colored.

“But, I thought after…” he was referring to the first time he tried to see Jeremy after he had been moved here and Ryan had blocked him again. Alex sighed and stood up, coming over and putting a hand on a thin shoulder as he passed by.

“Ryan’s not here right now and to be honest, even though I support them, I think Ryan needs to back up a bit. You have to understand, Jeremy means the world to him, that’s all. He’ll warm up to you.” Alex patted him and walked out, leaving Matt with Jeremy, Caleb a shadow by the wall, fiddling with things then stepping back, taking notes and reminders. The tall blonde smiled at him, and jerked his head, beckoning him closer.

“It’s cool Matty. I’m B team too remember? You let me know if anything happens, and I’ll let you know if big, tall and pissed off comes back.” He said mildly then left, closing the door behind him.

Alone at last.

He approached slowly, sinking down into the still warm seat Alex had left. He hesitated before he put his hands over Jeremy’s the big hand of the short man so familiar to touch. It had been touching him since they were kids. Traced over his body as a teen. Intimately familiar as an adult.

“Jeremy…” He said softly, eyes starting to brim behind his glasses.

“Jeremy, I’m so sorry.”

 

It was simple. Jeremy had text them he was canceling because Geoff needed him at the fights. Trevor had helped with the set up and knew the place back to front. They would go in, grab Jeremy, and get out before any of the crew knew what was going on. They knew Jeremy would most likely be on cover duty, his skills as a sniper demanding it. Therefore, when they had pulled up in their stolen Elegy, they knew where to look for potential sniper nests.

Trevor had taken the stairs, Matt the ladder, counting to himself to give Trevor time to get up there. He had the knife only as a precaution. Just something that would give Jeremy pause, enough time to listen to them. Or enough time to use the syringe in Trevor’s pocket. Either way, they were taking Jeremy out of los Santos, tonight.

Trevor went first, playing a very uneasy bait, obscuring his features with prosthetic and a dark overcoat of makeup. They needed to take Jeremy by surprise, get his coms out before he could raise an alarm to the main crew. Matt was ever the more silent one, so he moved now. He saw the faintest indication of Jeremy hidden ahead of him.

He stepped forward quickly, knife to Jeremy’s side and a hand grabbing the gun before it could sound.

“Jer-“he didn’t get the full name out, his hit man friend responding with an elbow to his face. He threw his head back to miss it and Jeremy had kicked out. He lost his footing and the knife sailed in like through butter almost of its own accord. Jeremy’s eyes met his, recognition flaring briefly.

“Matt?” he mouthed then fell to his knee’s shock coursing through his system.

“Dam it! Matt what happened?!” Trevor ran over, Jeremy keeling over to his side, ripping the com from Jeremy's ear as the sniper put hands around the knife still stuck inside him. Trevor patted uselessly at Jeremy while matt spluttered, a surreal feeling coming down around his head.

“I don’t- I didn’t- He attacked-Jeremy, I-“Trevor looked up, panicked at matt who could only gaze at what he had done. Then they were looking at Jeremy’s face when the man reached out and grabbed Trevor’s shirt.

“Run. Go now. They’ll- ah… They’ll kill you. You weren’t” he gasped, fingers tighten around his side and the grip he had on the shirt, “Weren’t here. Hit me.”

“What? Jeremy, no we can’t-“

“Knock me out. Slows my heart. Breathing. More time. Snipe-“he gasped deep again. More blood coming from the wound. “Snipe their feet. Slow them down. Make them think-“

Matt put a hand to his mouth trying to stop the sobs from coming, crawling forward to kneel over Jeremy’s, that face turning more white as they watched.

“Gang attack. Go.” He let go of Trevor and pressed his head back into the floor, both hands now on his side. Matt leant over him but Jeremy had closed his eyes gritted in pain.

“Jeremy, I’m sorry.” He said.

“Fuck you. Matt.” He spat out then cried out, pulling the knife out of his side, the metal falling to the roof floor, Matt’s initials in the handle.

“Fuck- do it- Hit me.” Jeremy said and rolled onto his wounded side, his body weight putting on pressure. Matt felt as if he had stabbed himself when he brought the hilt down hard on Jeremy’s temple. His oldest brother gave a jerk then went still, slumped over his wound. Matt was crying hard, tears obscuring his vision as he leant over and kissed Jeremy’s stubble cheek.

“I’m sorry, oh god Jeremy, I’m so, so sorry.” He cried then Trevor was there, pulling at his shoulder.

“We got to go matt, come on. Quick! They’ll save him but they’re close we got to move!” Neither felt good about it but they did it. They left him there, the man they both loved, to bleed to death from the wound that they had dealt him.

God they were fucking morons.

 

“Matt?” Jeremy’s voice was so weak and hoarse but Matt would recognize it anytime. He looked up to see Jeremy, eyes glazed staring at him.

“Jeremy! I’m so sorry man! I didn’t mean to, I swear, we just wanted…” he trailed off, cowed by the look of betrayal in Jeremy’s red face. He felt the faintest pressure in his hands and let go, allowing Jeremy to weakly pull his hand away.

“Get out.” He murmured, barely a whisper. Matt felt his heart break and stood, leant over Jeremy, pleading.

“No Jeremy, you got to understand. We just wanted too-“

“Get out!” his voice was no stronger but his eyes were angry now and a tear slid down a fever bright cheek. Matt chocked on his remorse, shaking his head.

“I can’t! I can’t leave you!”

“You did though. Where were you when I was in hospital?”

“but we-“

“Where were you these past few days?”

“We tried but Ryan-“

Now Jeremy gained a bit of volume, head coming up slightly from the pillow.

“Don’t you dare blame Ryan? He’s been here for me! He’s been here every moment! Dealing with the fucking hole YOU gave me!” Matt moved back, unable to bear the hurt and betrayal in Jeremy’s voice, the injured mans eyes rolling madly, an echo of the vagabond.

“Jeremy, I didn’t mean to-“

“get out matt god! You should be used to not being wanted!” Matt sucked in a breath like he had the air punched out of his lungs. Jeremy almost looked sorry for his words but then he grimaced, his body stiffening as sharp pains shoot up from his wound.

“Just stay the fuck away from me. For the love I once bore you, I won’t tell the others. But you need to stay away.”

“Jeremy, I love you.” Jeremy closed his eyes sucking in another pained breath but made no response. Matt backed away, his eyes on Jeremy, feeling his heartbreak into a thousand tiny pieces. The shards cut through him, gutting his core and before he knew it, he was running. He burst past Caleb, past Alex and Michael, out into the street. He heaved huge sobs, hands on his knees.

He screamed when a hand touched his back, and then threw himself into Trevor’s arms.

“He hates us! He hates us both!” he cried, barely coherent and hardly listened to Trevor explain to Alex matt was having a hard time dealing with seeing Jeremy so beat up. He heard Alex murmur some kind of supporting words back then Trevor was pulling him to the car. He was thrust into his seat, Trevor buckling him in then getting in himself.

Matt only started to get control of himself when he heard Trevor talk on the phone.

“Yeah Lindsay, If we’re not needed, we need some time. Yeah it’s hit us pretty hard, Matt especially. No, it’s terrible; we’ve never seen him so injured. I guess we do see main crew as invincible. Yeah, we’ll come visit him again for sure, just while he’s on the mend, we’re gonna take a few days. How long? Ah tonight and tomorrow night. Yep, call us if he takes another bad turn. Ok thanks linds. You too. Bye.”

He hung up and looked to Matt who was hiccupping and staring at him.

“Ok, we have two nights before Vagabond starts hunting us. We disappear.”

“What about Jeremy?” Matt asked miserably and Trevor reached over, patting back his hair.

“Jeremy has been fucking brainwashed. He was in fever; he had no idea what he was saying. We let him mend and this time we go in with tranq guns. He won’t be reasoned with while he’s under their influence so we’ll take him the hell out of there.” He looked to Matt who was nodding slowly.

“Jeremy loves us Matt. He’ll choose us in the end, you’ll see.”

 

This was therapeutic. Just the swing of the fist, the thud of flesh, the grunt of a pained cry bitten back. He was working in the interrogation room, this being a job set by Geoff. That wasn’t to say Ryan wasn’t going to take this personally. Just that this man would never be another faceless Edgar. This man was special. This man was-

“Dwight? Seriously? Oh that’s bad luck right there.” Gavin called lazily by the door, the unfortunate Dwight’s wallet in his hand. Dwight himself was hanging from the ceiling, the pads of his feet just touching the floor, his shirt and vest both gone exposing his back and chest to their eyes. Ryan backed up a bit, shaking his fists out, his hands a little sore but the ache familiar.

“What do you do when your pulled up by the popo in front of your buddies huh?” Dwight said nothing, silence being the shield in which he thinks to protect himself. Ryan smiled the challenge sweet. He loved a big strong biker, which was what this Dwight was turning out to be. Something Gavin actually called him on.

“So tell me Dwighty. If you love to cruise around, intimidating people for that wanker boss of yours, why were you driving that sweet Elegy ride around the port the other night huh? Not your standard ride is it?” Gavin waited a beat for a reply but got none. So he backed away letting Ryan have his turn. Ryan channeled everything he had been feeling, using the body almost like a boxing back to work out his frustration, watching Jeremy dying and not being able to do anything about it. His irritation, Jeremy staying vague about his attackers, not giving them anything to help the crew track them down. His growing feelings for the shortest of the lads, his inability to understand what he wanted.

Gavin brushed a hand down his spine and he backed off, panting slightly, breath hot under his mask. Dwight was groaning, his breath becoming labored from all the hits to his lungs and guts. Time to shift tactics if they didn’t want to cause internal injuries. Ryan looked over his tools as Gavin tried to get the information they needed.

“D-man, we’re friends here you and me. See, It’s a bit embarrassing but I got a tiny bit of a gag reflex problem. I know, ridiculous right? I’m in the Fake AH crew for crying out loud!” he laughed as if he was sharing a joke with the hanging man, but the prisoner was looking for the vagabond, the tools spread out where he could see. Gavin snapped his fingers in Dwight’s face.

“Hey knob, look at me. Ok, so here’s what’s going to happen if you stay poker faced. Vagabond is going to be miffed off and neither of us wants that. I really want to keep my lunch inside my body thanks and you, well you probably want to keep your body intact.”

There was a sharp noise from the tool table, Vagabond turning to look at the two, each hand holding a sparkplug attached to a car battery. He hit them together again, causing another spark to sing.

“I wouldn’t feed the man false information Gavvers. There are plenty of things I can do without breaking the skin.” That low menacing voice sounded so upbeat about it, Dwight eyeing off the battery. Gavin watched as Dwight’s mouth twitched like it was going to open then bit down on the words. He sighed and backed up again.

“Alright, have it your way then.” He said and Ryan gently ran one spark plug down Dwight’s nose, over the lips and chin, dipping into the throat momentarily before going sideways until it was pressed to his side, just touching the top of his abs.

“You're going to get one hell of a work out.” Vagabond intoned then pressed the other plug to the opposite side, sending all the muscles between them to spasm. Air hissed out between teeth and he broke the circuit quickly. Dwight slumped, breathing hard, burns on his sides where the plugs had been. He flinched, throwing his head back as Vagabond did the same trace line once again, just as slow this time starting on the opposite side.

He spasmed again, a grunt being forced out before Ryan stopped.

“Why were you driving that Elegy that night?” He asked before Gavin could. Dwight sucked in another breath, gathering his courage and glaring at the black skull.

“Ok then.” Vagabond shrugged and started the trace lines again. This time he followed the collarbone up to the shoulder, resting it there and bringing the other one close to the opposite side.

“Hey Gavin, want to hear me play a gangbanger?” he asked mildly.

“Sure, how does it go?” Gavin asked. Ryan pressed down into skin, the line traveling over vocal cords so they had a impromptu performance from Dwight, as his throat opened and closed in grunts and groans against his will. Ryan stopped it again and Dwight slumped once more, gasping and coughing, salvia hanging from his lips.

“That was a great song Vagabond, but you know what I’d like to hear?”

“What’s that?”

“What he was doing near the docks?!”

Dwight sucked in two more deep breaths then when Ryan placed the plug against the bridge of his nose, ready to trace down once more, threw his head back, whole body swinging as he called out.

“I was stalking you!” he admitted, eye’s panicked on Gavin. Ryan sighed and started to put the battery away as the Lad strode forward. Gavin stopped before their prisoner, pointing a finger at his chest.

“Wot? Me?”

“Yes, yes you! Gavino Free of the Fake Ah crew, Boss Ramsey’s lead negotiator.”

“What for?” Dwight looked pained, not wanting to admit what his orders were. Vagabond was coming close again, in his hand a collection of thin metal spikes akin to the acupuncture needles. His dead eyes seemed to glow out of the skull.

“I’ll tell you what for Gav. Our man here was ordered to follow you, learn your schedule. I bet he was ordered to get you alone. Maybe rough you up. Maybe kill you. Am I close?” He asked as Gavin looked between them, his face getting more offended by the moment.

“Dwight, this true? You were going to hurt me?” he asked, sounding all the world like his best friend had betrayed him. Dwight opened his mouth to answer but cried out as Vagabond stuck him with a needle, right in the joint between his hips and his leg. He proceeded to place three more around that socket, then moved on to the other hip, needles punctuating words, “He followed you (stab), He saw an opening (stab) he took that opening (stab) and he got Lil’ (stab) J (stab) instead! (stab, stab)”

Dwight was openly crying, his hips afire, stabbing pain lancing right down to his toes, every twitch of leg muscle agony.

“No! No! I didn’t touch anyone! I swear! Please!” he cried out as Ryan started to dig small lines into his chest with a needle point, spelling out VAGABOND. Dwight screamed and shook as He did so.

“I didn’t hurt anyone! I was going to ambush him when there was a fucking sniper shot! Some guy just exploded in front of me so I booked it! Oh god please stop!”

Ryan swung his head to look to Gavin who sighed and nodded. With a growl, he grabbed all four needles in each hip with a hand and ripped them out.

“Fuck. Well if not this fucker then who do I skin?!” Vagabond roared, throwing the needles at the wall in frustration. Gavin waited for him to calm a little before he moved close, whispering so the sobbing Dwight couldn’t hear.

“He might not be the guy who attacked Jeremy but he still might have something useful to tell.” Gavin reasoned and Ryan gave a sharp nod of his head.

“Fine, but I’m done playing around. Let’s just make him sing quick so we can track that other car.” He muttered and snatched up the pliers, grabbing Dwight’s chin and lining up a tooth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ..... yeah i'm a monster.... I'm sorry Treco and matty! I didn't mean to drive you away! it just kinda came, out, jeremy's pretty pissed and out of it, a bad combo to be and Ryan will be home soon so...  
>  yeah sorry guys lol  
> But don't worry, we haven't seen the last of them.  
> for good or bad, we'll see them again  
> oh, i tried a diffrent style to writing gavins accent, am i trying ot hard or is it more authentic? should i start writing it micool for gav or leave it to michael, you all knowing how he pronounces it? let me know!  
> see you soon!


	21. (Cannon filler) Bombfire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bombfire night, lets have some fun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, i wanted to post something but unfortunetly my household has come down with a bug -ugh someone send help- so I was purusing what little clips i've got, trying to build on them when i saw this one and remembered i said i'd post it.  
> So shorter then usuasl just a little fun, more for kicks then plot. Warning, there's a horrific death ahead, obviously as it's the bombfire lol but yea, just leting you know it's in there  
> Enjoy

They had the bomb fire on the beach far from the city. It could almost pass for a party, people arriving in cars, trunks opening to blast music that made the ground rumble. Kegs and eskies where set out, food pouring forth from the back of a ute and a few fires lit around the main one to cook some fresh meat to complement the snacks going around. People threw out blankets, danced, or swam in the cool ocean with the moon bright above them.

Gavin and Michael were celebrities to this group, all the smaller pieces that made up the Ramsey Empire. B team was there too, Trevor already drunk and dancing in the sand with a dark eyed Mica, in his arms. Andy the guy who bought and sold their properties, keeping money in their hands and out of more legal hands, was pacing out drinks from his trunk, bags of weed from his pockets. Matt was sitting by a smaller fire; head bent close to Caleb, their medic, long blonde and short blonde hair pressed together as matt described something in the air.

Lindsay was in her element, walking around, chatting to everyone, a wide smile on her face and the fire reflected in her eyes. Michael grinned to see her and gave Gavin a parting pat before he was weaving through the people to get to her. Gavin humphed, crossing his arms and wishing Geoff had allowed Jeremy to come. The boss had forbidden it as he thought the main event would stir up Jeremy too much.

He was staying home with the lad instead as Ryan was off doing his celebration tonight.

“Linds!” Michael called, waving a hand, as he got closer. People were trying to get his attention but he shoved past them, Lindsay turning to face him fully, lighting up as they met each other’s eyes.

“Hey Michael! So glad you came! Worried big bad Mogar would be too cool to hang with us B team.” She teased and he chuckled, running a hand through his curls, tousling them.

“Yeah well, who can resist a bomb fire right?” he said and she beamed at him.

“I know I can’t.” She said and he matched her grin.

“Me neither.” He nodded his head towards Andy and the entertainment hand out ,”Wanna get like a fucking drink or something?” he asked and Lindsay nodded extending her elbow to him which he took in his own. They grabbed some drinks then hit the food, chatting and chuckling together happily.

Gavin had found himself in the midst of a fan mob, people wanting him to sign their guns or shirts, wanting pictures and to shake his hand. Gavin was never happier then when he had a large group of people hanging off his every word. He had even forgotten the silent promise of a wink shared between him and mica, the woman having chosen another since he had been late.

“Now they had changed the system since last time we had been but it was no problem for me, I’m telling you. Those big old doors swung wide and guess what?”

Chorus of the crowd gasping and demanding he tell them,

“Bloody thing was empty! Bloody ‘ell Mogar was furious! Bank was god dam closed and they moved the money out for the holidays!” He glowed under the laughter and admiration of his fellows as he regaled them with the resulting chaos.

Matt was nodding next to Caleb as the medic told him what repeated damage to the larynx could result in. Matt’s mind was on the Jeremy he had seen yesterday and his eye on drunken Trevor, worried for both his brothers. That Trevor had woken up, told him about the conversation he had with Jeremy then immediately started to drink was an extremely bad sign. Matt was letting Trevor be trashed again tonight, hoping he would work it from his system so they can start planning tomorrow. He also was going to pour every drop down the sink the moment they got home.

Trevor was depressed and drowning that depression in the bottle. He had been set free the night Jeremy had brought him back upstairs to see for himself his master dead in his bed. It was more than the man deserved. Matt had eased him back to his humanity, Jeremy a safe shelter for him to grow in. Now Jeremy was being hurt, brainwashed as Trevor had.

And he was helpless to stop it.

So he drunk, the alcohol burning away at his intelligence until there was only the drunken fun of dancing on the beach, the feel of soft hands gripping his hips tight as he grinded against his co-worker. She tasted like the hard liquor they were sharing between them and he breathed hard when she was nibbling at his ear, whispering how she wanted him.

Trevor was fine with her giving the orders. He was used to being ordered around.

After the moon had reached high, Lindsay knew it was time for the main event. She broke off from Michaels lips, stilling his hands on her body where they were laid out in the sand. They were both breathing heavy, the air thick around them with a charged energy.

“Want to help me with the bomb fire?” she asked and he nodded, hypnotised by the excitement in her voice. She handed him the keys and pointed out the correct truck, the one Andy had been standing by, his true purpose now revealed not as someone to hand out the treats but as a guard. Michael pressed her back into the sand, kissing her hard before he moved away leaving her squirm for a moment at the promise that kiss made between them.

She got up, fixing herself to be presentable and then waded into the crowd to find her second. There was a scream ate up by the music so she paused and put a hand on Matt as she pasted the two blonde’s.

“It’s time, go turn the music down.” Matt nodded and started to get to his feet, Lindsay looking around a little confused.

“Where’s mica?” she asked them and Caleb pointed over a sand dune as Matt spoke up.

“She and Trevor are working a few kinks out we think.” He said and Lindsay groaned in irritation. She started over the dune’s calling for her second.

“Fuck me!” Mica whispered franticly when the music ebbed lower and she could hear her boss calling. Trevor was laying beneath her, his hands still on her hips as she sat up, reaching for her shirt and tugging it down her body.

“I think I just did.” He slurred happily and she grinned pressing a finger to his lips shushing him before pressing a quick kiss to them.

“No I think you’ll find I was the one fucking you.” She teased then got up, snatching at her pants, and jumping into them. Trevor gave a small moan then started reaching for the jeans around his knee’s working them back up as sand got in uncomfortable places.

“So that was fun, do it again sometime.” Mica said quickly, Lindsay’s voice getting closer. The assassin leapt over Trevor, leaving him there to slowly pull his own outfit together, their fun romp already fading from her mind as she answered her bosses call.

“Jeez! What a time to disappear! Mogar is setting up the present you got me. Did you wanna see?” Lindsay asked as mica came into her view. She smiled at that dishevelled hair and the fact mica was still buttoning her shorts.

“Having fun?” she mocked and mica grabbed her hand, starting to tug her back to the fire. She threw a look over the sand in Lindsay’s hair and her kiss-swollen lips with a grin.

“Are you?” she shot back and the two girls giggled together over the ease of seducing men.

Back at the fire, Gavin had shooed his fans back, helping Michael secure a sobbing and gagged man to the pole dug deep into the sand and wood was stacked all around his feet. The chains were tight, metal so he would be staying against the pole the whole time he fried. He was murmuring something that sounded like begging so Gavin causally backhanded him as Michael finished behind the unfortunate man.

“So think you’re going home with her tonight?” he asked continuing the conversation the two were having. Michael pulled on the chains making the guy groan in pain from the pressure in his shoulders then came around the front with a grin.

“She’s a classy girl gav. I’m thinking this isn’t gonna just be a once of to blow of fucking steam.” Gavin raised an eyebrow, making a kiss smack with his lips that had Michael shoving him hard once then laughing.

“Fucking jealous.” He told his friend who came back laughing.

“Nah. Being tied down to one person would suck. I like being free.” He tilted his head at the crowd a respectful distance around them, tucking his hands in his pockets and putting on an air of indifference.

“Gotta give our adoring fans what they want after all.” He said and winked at a woman who grinned wider, grasping her friend arm in excitement. Lindsay and Mica came through and Michael made sure to sidle next to her side as they put their backs to the stake.

“All right! The main event! Now as you know, we are the FAKEAH!” cheers went up around them, excitement building as they shouted approval for the main crew. Lindsay held up a hand, “We’ve had a bit of a witch hunt lately! Someone had been taking our hard earn product! The stuff you have slaved over, worked over, gotten fucking burnt over! Took the sweat of your brow and was selling it on the side, that money going into their useless lazy hands!” Lindsay stirred up the crowd expertly; Gavin himself could not have done a better job. She turned the anger on the guy on the stake; this group made up mostly of their worker bees and hired thugs. Making them believe the money this guy had made on the side was as if he had taken straight from their hands.

“So now we got a witch ladies, gents, cooks and gunman! AND WHAT DO WE DO WITH WITCHES!”

“BURN HIM! BURN HIM! BURN HIM!” the crowd chanted back to Lindsay who had a fist raised, striking and chanting with her people. Michael was watching her, passion for the fire in her face, finding himself shouting along just to see her smile widen at him. Gavin turned, taking the gas canister from Andy and tossing one to mica, the two pouring it all over the man and the wood as he muffled screams into his gag and jerked against the wood. Once that done, they threw the canisters to the side, Lindsay and Michael still pumping the crowd.

“Let’s light this bitch!” yelled Gavin as he came back to Michaels side and Lindsay turned to the lithe red haired man, excitement more pronounced on her face then when they were pressed up into the sand together. He handed her a matchbox and thrilled from the top of his head to the bottom of his toes when she grabbed his wrist and pulled him in for a kiss. He recovered fast, wrapping strong arms around her and Deeping their shared kiss, the crowd screaming for blood around them and Gavin clapping happily.

They broke apart, Lindsay still cradled in Michaels arms as she shared a savage look with him. She lit a match; a finger tracing the flame like it was a friendly cat before she tossed in it onto the wood. A whoosh as the fuel caught and Michael had turned her, catching the heat across his shoulders, Lindsay peering over his shoulder, fascinated as the flame ate at a human being before them.

The screams broke into shrieks, the gag burning away to hear the full horror and agony in his voice until it broke off, blessed death taking him. Gavin had been nice enough to coat his head in the fuel.

The smell of burning flesh wafted over them all, the music blaring once more as people shouted and cheered in frenzy, laughing and watching a man burnt alive.

This is why they served the FAKEAH crew. The most Badass crazy motherfuckers in all of Los Santos. They worked hard, they played hard and when they were crossed, they came down hard. It also reminded everyone present that they would do their job to the best of their ability, would always obey orders handed down. Because if this was the price, who wanted to pay it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah, that was the night of the bombfire that jeremy missed out on, it's been mentioned a few times. Just how the wider gang kick back and how lindsay gets her thrills  
> Hope you enjoyed and i'll post another chpater soon hopefully  
> Now i'm off to go die, see you when i'm reserected in like 24 hours hopefully lol


	22. Two weeks later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poor Matt and Trevor lay low, Jeremy works out how he feels  
> Mogar and Ryan work out some anger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M ALIVE!! lol i survived and as a bonus, finished the next chapter of our little adventure.  
> So theres depression ahead, more angst, teeny bit of fluff then to get that icky feelings stuff off, some pretty brutal stuff from team crazy mad.  
> Hope you enjoy but hey, i don't own you ;) you make your own choices

Matt came home and sighed heavily to find Trevor laid out on the couch, passed out again. It had been two weeks since they had fled the FAKEAH crew and after establishing this crappy little base in the attic of a warehouse in Banning, Trevor had then proceeded to try to kill himself by outdrinking Geoff. Their temporary home here reminded Matt of the years he and Jeremy had spent in a similar situation, long nights held up in the only dry corner, watching the rain pour in through the holes in the roof.

One year, Matt had gotten pneumonia and Jeremy had spent every dollar they had getting him a crappy hotel room to recover in. Matt knew they didn’t have enough for as long as they stayed but coward that he was, he never asked where Jeremy had gotten the extra. Fifteen years old and already a hit man.

Trevor’s long fingers brushed the neck of the bottle of cheap vodka that had spilt out onto the floor. Matt picked it up and flung it angrily out the window. Finding himself truly irritated with Trevor, he just left him there on that ratty old couch. Every time matt left, Trevor would somehow get more alcohol and drink until he passed out.

Matt knew Trevor was trying to deal with alot. He never did get to stalk those brothers, the diary left in their own apartment when they fled. When they moved to Los Santos, Trevor had gotten alot more confident in himself when he discovered stalking. It was the way Trevor shed stress and kept his anxieties under control. Watching different types of families, he never had, having a power over them that he never normally felt. That was normally how Trevor coped.

Now, it was the bottle.

On the other hand, Matt was having a terrible time trying to steal what they needed. The crew knew his MO and he couldn’t leave a trail to follow. He also couldn’t step on the toes of whatever gang claimed this territory for their own. So he spent most nights travelling far and wide, stealing food and supplies for them. Tonight had been a good haul; he had managed to get himself the last few components for the computer he was building. Of course, Trevor should be the one building it, his technical expertise greater then Matt’s but he was too busy being gnawed at by couch bugs.

Matt started awake by the sound of Trevor being sick in a bucket Matt had left by the couch. He had fallen asleep, still tinkering with the computer, trying to install the police software into it so he could get reports on the FAKEAH crew’s whereabouts. They didn’t normally go subtle so it would be useful. He rubbed his eyes, pulling his glasses straight.

“Morning Trevor.” He said a bit vindictively, Trevor flinching then gagging again.

“Why aren’t I dead yet?” he moaned over the bucket and matt sighed, getting up to grab a fresh bottle of water and breakfast, a can of spaghetti and a can opener.

“Because I hate you and keep you around because you’re the only one more miserable then I am.” He handed the water over and Trevor washed out his mouth then lay back against the couch.

“Oh, I hate you.” He mumbled and Matt had to scoff.

“You love me. I’m adorable.”

He managed to get some food and some more water into his handsome friend, Trevor looking less a ghost, more a person as he sobered up from his hangover. Matt gestured at the computer he had been working on, filling in Trevor on what he’d scavenged in the night. Trevor sighed, staring into the half-eaten can as if it held all the answers.

“Trevor. I need to know if there’s anymore alcohol.” Matt decided to approach him head on this time. Trevor gave a humourless chortle.

“There’s always more alcohol matty.” Matt growled, turning away and clenching his fists before he said something he’d regret. It just fit in with his life right now that Trevor would fall into one of his depression phases right now. At time’s Trevor was a take-charge person, leading the way, positive energy boiling over, creative ideas flying from him. Then in the face of adversity, when the adrenaline burns away... this...

Trevor poked at his food morosely, mumbling, “Think Ryan will get angry and kill us quick?”

Matt ignored it and got up, needing some space to think.

“Maybe Michael will do it. That would defiantly be quick, but it’s going to hurt the whole time were dying.” Matt closed his eyes, tuning out Trevor’s list of the different ways they could be killed. He wished Jeremy were with them. Jeremy could balance them out nicely, them doing the same for him, until they were all practically normalish human beings.

“You know, Gavin had some fair points...”

If Jeremy didn’t kill them, Matt just might do it himself.

How the fuck were they going to rescue him?

 

Jeremy leant heavily on Ryan, the gent helping him through the door into the penthouse suite. Jeremy could walk himself, but all his muscles were still healing up his side and being bleed out followed by that nasty infection really took a lot out of a guy. He sat down with a grunt, the painkillers he was on not stopping the sharp jab from his still healing side.

“You ok?” Ryan asked stiffly and Jeremy nodded.

“Just being a little bitch.” He commented, Gavin laughing as he settled in beside Jeremy cautiously. Ryan didn’t even twitch, just nodding and walking away into the kitchen. Jeremy sighed, wondering how long Ryan could be pissy at him.

It hadn’t taken more than two hours after Matt and Trevor had left before the crew put it together. A combination of Gavin tracking down the stolen Elegy to find that it had been taken from some idiot gangbanger. It had taken Ryan less than ten minutes to get a full and complete description of Trevor. It added up with the inconsistencies the two had regarding Jeremy’s recovery, their relief that he hadn’t spoken about the attack, the fact Jeremy stirred for Geoff when he mentioned their names.

Jeremy was in trouble with the gent’s he knew that, but he was confident they weren’t going to hurt him. Well Ryan would, but not until he could take it. Thus the cold shoulder treatment. Michael was angry too but Gavin was his usual easy self. The only one to act normal around him.

“Wanna play some Halo?” he asked and Jeremy nodded thankfully, the tenseness in the apartment outweighing everyone’s relief he was home. Michael was sitting on the opposite end of the couch, arms folded and glaring out the window, not looking at him. Alex was in the kitchen, dancing around Ryan, making them a welcome home dinner for Jeremy. Geoff was talking to someone on the phone, standing by the telescope, facing away from the TV.

Gavin set it up and handed him a controller. He went to log into his gamer tag when the controller was pulled from his grip and tossed to Michael. Ryan handed him a glass of water and some tablets instead.

“What? I can’t play?” Jeremy asked, obediently taking the antibiotics and painkiller combo as Ryan settled on his other side.

“No.” He said seriously, putting an arm over the back of the couch, letting Jeremy lean his good side on him as he glared some space between Gavin and Jeremy’s wound. The lad shuffled away sighing.

“You grounded or something Lil’J?”

“Yes.” Ryan answered for him, Lil’J giving a groan.

“Come on Rye, really?”

“Yes.” Ryan answered then pulled his phone out, ignoring the pleading from his partner. Geoff finished his call and walked into the lounge room, pointing the phone at Jeremy.

“Sure you don’t want to tell me where you B team Buddies are hiding?” he asked casually and Jeremy’s face-hardened as he felt Ryan stiffen, eye’s turning to him.

“I have no idea.” He said deadpan and Geoff sighed, every inch the disappointed father.

“Ok, then yes, you are grounded. If you won’t choose Main crew, you can’t play with main crew.”

“Geoff, come on it’s not like that!”

“It is Jeremy! Those fuckers stabbed you! Why are you protecting them?” Geoff exploded, Gavin and Michael exchanging a knowing look at this now familiar argument. The stronger Jeremy got, the more angry they all became with him.

“I’m not protecting them! I have no idea where’d they go!”

“That’s bullshit Lil’J” Michael put in, pushing his frustration into the game in his hands, “They’ve gone to ground and you sure as shit would know where.”

“Come on J, Just tell them and it’ll be over.” Gavin encouraged softly and Jeremy sat straighter, ignoring his side as he thrust his hands out.

“I haven’t spoken to them since Matt ran out ok? I’ve been guarded by you guys round the clock, you still haven’t given me my phone back!” Ryan tugged him back into place growling to him softly.

“Stop moving like that, your new skins still weak.” Jeremy ignored him, glaring at Geoff.

“Besides, what would you do if you did find them?”

“They attacked a member of my crew. I can’t let them go.” Geoff answered seriously, those heavy lidded eyes making Jeremy uncomfortable as they locked onto his.

“It was an accident. As the victim of said accident, I want to give them a pass. Besides they’d be across the border by now.”

“Accident. Still trying to go with that huh?” Michael scoffed from his place, Ryan's arm dropping around Jeremy’s shoulders, uncomfortably tight.

“Why was there a knife, ‘accidently’ to your side huh? What were they doing up on that roof with you?”Geoff asked harshly, irritation in his tone and now Jeremy could only stutter for something to say.

“I-I don’t know. It kinda slipped in then I didn’t really focus on the why, just the what now all right? Matt tried to explain, but I didn’t give him a chance, “he sounded disappointed at that, Ryan's hand gripping tighter on his shoulder, “I just don’t kn-“

“Don’t you fucking say, ‘I don’t know’ again.” Geoff warned, his patience starting to wear out, “Just fucking don’t. Now we’ve been as nice as we can seeing as you were a stuck pig, but I’ve had it. Now I’m ordering you. ORDERING you, to tell me where they would be.” Geoff came close as he was talking, stopping when his face was in Jeremy’s, his hands on the lads thighs, danger only echoed by Ryan’s sharp gaze on Jeremy’s face.

The game had been forgotten, everyone looking to Jeremy who was flushing red with anger and embarrassment, clear indecision on his face.

“Ok everyone, calm down! This is Jeremy’s first night home alright? Let’s just be thankful he’s not dead huh?” alex, the voice of reason, seeing Jeremy was in no fit state to be answering this loaded question. He knew as well as the rest of them, when Geoff asked ‘where were they’ he was really asking ‘whose side are you on?’

“Now I’m making taco’s so you assholes better not get any on the couches or your getting your very own time out.”

Geoff grunted and stalked away, clinking of his glasses coming from behind them. Gavin and Michael restarted the game, Michael asking for less beans and more meat this time in the mix. Ryan stayed quiet, looking down at his phone, Jeremy relieved Alex had broken the interrogation.

Geoff wandered over to Alex, watching over his shoulder as the gent stirred the taco mix, delicious smells now rising from the pan.

“You can’t keep helping him put it off.” Geoff said softly and Alex let the pan simmer, turning to the salad, and knife in hand. As he cut up the tomatoes and diced the lettuce, he spoke low, Geoff the only one to hear him.

“You can’t keep pushing him. This is turning into Ray all over again. I won’t let you guys drive another Lad off. Now I’m pissed too, you know I am. But we got to think of the whole crew here.”

“I am Alex!” Geoff hissed then took a breath to calm himself, “I am.” He continued calmer, “They betrayed us. They betrayed Jeremy. Now I have no idea what they thought they were doing but-“

“They were taking him.” Alex cut in; derailing the lecture Geoff was building into.

“W-What?” Alex moved back to the mince now, still casual as he explained.

“Look at how things have been since Jeremy was bumped up. They were the dream team on B team, and then suddenly we took away Jeremy, made him one of us. He clicked here really well too. Then he started getting all trigger-happy. Remember right about when that happened?” Geoff shook his head and Alex sighed.

“I’m the only one who pays attention huh? Jeremy started losing his cool the more he fit in with us and the less he went home. About the same time he moved in here.” Alex poured the mince into a bowl, pulling out the wraps.

“But, Jeremy passed trails. Of course he was going to move in here.”

“Geoff,” Alex turned, pausing in his prep to look his oldest friend in the eye, “look around, what you see?”

Geoff frowned but humoured him, looking around the apartment.

“Ah, same swanky pad as always. Dumb and dumbest shit playing a stupid game. Nut job and Crazy killer snuggling away like we don’t get their banging each other.” Then Geoff smirked, gesturing at Alex himself, “And Alex ‘I think I know everything and kinda wanna be everyone’s mum’ Stanley standing there making stupid face at me.”

Alex laughed, as always entertained by Geoff's way with words.

“Ok, yes. But not what I meant. You see a load of mentally unstable men. Michael likes to smash heads in for fun and he’s the mildest. Then you got Gavin who in his spare time, and work time come to think of it, likes to talk people to literally death. Then there’s our favourite pet monster. You, the alcoholic gangster boss who wants to rule the whole god dam city. And me. I get that it’s not normal the love I have for pet. Jeremy was relatively normal until he moved in with us.” Geoff looked like he was going to object but Alex put a finger to his moustache, silencing him.

“Yeah, the kid had been through some shit, but as a hit man, he was surprisingly stable. Then he moved in with us, helped out with Michael, spoke with Gavin. He watched Ryan and followed you guns a blazing into ridiculous schemes that had the rule ‘No survivors.’ With that much blood on his hands, is it a surprise that he grew to like it as much as Ryan? That we might have influenced him in some way? That it might concern the friends he’s had for years?” Alex raised his brows knowingly then yelled out to the guys that grub was up. Ryan made Jeremy stay, coming up first to get a plate for himself and the lad. Geoff took another drink and gave Alex a look that said they were going to continue this after dinner. Alex nodded and started to pass out drinks.

When they all had a plateful and a drink, they arranged themselves all over the lounge room and threw on the first movie Gavin touched. Geoff took what Gavin liked to call his ‘throne’ the only single seater. Everyone else had to sit on the corner couch, Gavin the floor since Ryan was on the side, Jeremy against him, the resident interrogator not letting anyone near his Lad. Gavin took the first bite, shrieking and spitting it out as it burnt his tongue. As Michael and Gavin laughed, Alex took his own bite and around a mouthful said mockingly, “Careful, it’s hot.”

They laughed their way through Heist, Geoff’s eyes sparked as he got ideas. Jeremy launched a campaign to make Ryan chuckle, cracking jokes the whole way through and succeeding in melting the cold shoulder just a little. Michael pointed out the shitty acting and camera work, mocking the over blown effects. Alex liked to call out the cliché lines and everyone took a drink when he got it in before the characters did. Everyone except for Ryan who stuck to his diet coke and Jeremy, who had to stay on water for the time being.

“All right bedtime kiddies, and by kiddies I mean you Jeremy.” Geoff said as the movie rolled credits. Jeremy wanted to complain but the day had really taken it out of him, so he was unresisting when Gavin stood before him and helped his to his feet, Ryan getting up and taking over within moments. Jeremy bid everyone goodnight, starting to hobble away, leaning as little as possible on Ryan.

“Don’t be an idiot. Let me help.” Ryan grumbled as Jeremy shook him off.

“No. I got to at least walk to my own room, come on.”

“Actually you’re sleeping in mine now.” Ryan said, pulling him into the appropriate door. Jeremy blinked, stunned to see the space that was all Ryan's had been altered. Now Jeremy’s figures of master chief and Marcus fenix stood side by side with Ryan's collection of Shakespeare and a death bobble head on the dresser. Jeremy’s monster truck poster had taken up room on the sidewall where Ryan normally had some sort of disturbing theory’s pinned up for contemplation.

Most marking of all, on the end posts of the bed, Ryan's Vagabond mask was hooked on the right, Jeremy’s Stetson on the left. He sat down next to it, pulling it off the end knob and turning it in his hands. His thumb brushed against a bloodstain on the brim.

“So, your clothes are now in these drawers. This one’s daily wear, shirts left, pants right. This one is job wear.” Ryan's voice explaining the set up was slowly drowned out as Jeremy’s mind drifted back.

 

“So toss your bag anywhere, there’s no order here in house Axel.” Matt said, gesturing around at the small space, practically a crawl space behind a wall in the attic of a old rundown apartment building. Jeremy let his bag drop off his shoulder, taking in the mildew on the walls, the holes in the ceiling where they could see stars and the little more than a rag nest in the corner with the most roof. Matt saw him looking around, rubbing the back of his neck self-consciously.

“Yeah, it’s not ah... not like your old swank place...”

“This is awesome dude!” Jeremy said, smiling at his friend who coloured and grinned.

“No it’s not, your just saying that.” He brushed it off as casually as he could but Jeremy grabbed his hands.

“No, seriously. This is all yours? Like no one ever finds you here?”

“Well you’re the only person I’ve shown.”

“Sweet! Where can I sleep?” Jeremy saw matt take in his excited face, felt the warmth of the smaller boys hands in his, the comforting smell of his jacket and realised that there was no space for another bed. Matt came to the same conclusion and shrugged.

“Guess we can bunk bud-dy?” matt asked his voice cracking a little on the end there.

 

“So were bunk buddies now huh?” Jeremy said slowly, cutting into Ryan's tour. Ryan looked back to him as Jeremy slowly looked up from his hat.

“So you just decided for me?” he asked deadpan and Ryan frowned.

“No Jeremy, you decided remember?”

“No Ryan, I don’t remember having the, ‘let’s move in together’ conversation.” Ryan folded his arms, starting to get angry again.

“You lived right down the god dam hall. You’ve been sleeping in my bed for months now. We were already living together.” Jeremy tried to get up but Ryan quickly stepped forward, pushing him back down onto the bed, gently but firmly.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“To my room. My own bed.”

“It’s not there.”

“What!?” Jeremy was indignant, his fist clenched and wound forgotten at the audacity Ryan was showing.

“The fuck do you mean by that?”

“I got rid of it. It was useless and unused. So we tossed it the fuck out. Your mine. Deal.” Ryan was unforgiving in tone, giving Jeremy the mad kings look that to date never failed to have him back down.

“You pushy, overbearing, controlling son of a BITCH!” Jeremy shouted and swung at Ryan's face, the gent having to take a step back. Jeremy couldn’t control the strength of his arm, the movement pulling him from his seat and onto the floor, crying out in pain. Ryan was equal parts furious to concerned, bending over the sniper, trying to assess the damage but Jeremy swung again with his free hand, the other wrapped around his sides.

“Don’t fucking touch me!”

“Ryan, what the fuck!” Alex roared from the doorway, coming in and kneeling down beside Jeremy. Ryan saw red as the gentle giant of their crew, laid his hand on Jeremy’s shoulder. He lunged forward to attack but a hand on his elbow swung him around and into the wall, shaking it and dazing him as his head hit. Then Geoff was behind him, pulling his arm up into a hold, and his forearm against his neck.

“Whoa big guy. Calm down, that’s an order!” Geoff demanded, trying to cut through the rage Ryan was under. As Geoff got his dog back on its leash, Alex helped Jeremy up, passing by Michael who was spotting Geoff, ready to intercede if Ryan threw the boss off him. Gavin stepped up in the hall, grabbing Jeremy’s other arm and sliding it over his shoulder.

“Did Ryan attack you?”Alex asked quietly and Jeremy shook his head hard, unable to answer through his clenched teeth. Sure enough, as they passed Jeremy’s room it was to see it near bare, the lights off but the door askew. Alex brought him into his own bedroom, laying him out on the bed.

“Sit with him Gavvers.” He ordered and turned away, dialling Caleb.

“Jeremy, what happened?” Gavin asked softly, eye’s on Alex’s back as he took his Boy’s hand.

“Fucking asshole wants to run my god dam life for me.” Jeremy muttered back, holding hard to Gavin's hand, furious at Ryan. Gavin cocked his head at him, confused.

“I thought that was your deal? That you liked that whole caveman stick.” Jeremy blinked, pain starting to ebb away as he concentrated on Gavin words.

“I don’t know, every since I woke up,” and they both knew he meant from the coma not this morning, “it’s just been rubbing me wrong. Now I get home to find, he’s just changed everything on me. Without even asking. Just came and decided what was best then is so surprised I got hurt because they couldn’t just come to me and tell me what the deal was!” Gavin looked to Jeremy now, who was panting after his little mini rant.

“You know, I talk alot to different people. But I listen too. And what I’m hearing her, is you might not be mad at Ryan.” Jeremy rolled his eyes at the lanky brit who grinned and nodded knowingly.

“Ok so maybe you are mad at Ryan, what’s new there? He’s an insufferable know it all bastard. But, I also think you’re pretty pissed at someone else. Some ones maybe?”

Alex had left, still talking on the phone and elsewhere in the apartment, they heard a trio of yelling voices. They both ignored it, Jeremy looking into Gavin's wide understanding eyes, his voice soothing him in a way different from painkillers.

“Matt stabbed me Gav.” He admitted out loud, not knowing why he was finally saying what he had been refusing too, for two weeks now, “He stabbed me. I know they had to run but they didn’t even try to help me. They didn’t try to stem the flow or call someone. They didn’t visit in the hospital and the one time I see Matt, Trevor didn’t even come with him. And he said ‘I’m sorry’? Like why the fuck were they up there to begin with?”

“You know why.” Gavin said confidently, absolutely no clue himself but he knew the right things to say to help someone else fill in blanks.

“Because they thought Ryan was stealing me from them. Because they thought I belong to them and if they can’t have me, no one can. I’m just an object Gavvers. That’s all. Their protector, Geoff’s sniper, Ryan's toy... No one ever see’s me.” Jeremy shut his eyes a tear sliding unwanted from the corner of his eye. Gavin bit back the urge to tell Jeremy the only way to take back control of his life was to end it. It was strong but he managed to force out different words instead.

“You think they wanted to own you?” he asked, his mental self roaring at him for not taking the easy kill.

“Everyone wants to own me.” Jeremy said slowly and sadly, Gavin looking up as he realised the voices had faded, “I’m never my own person. Just whatever I need to be in that moment.”

Alex appeared in the door again, looking at Gavin's sad face and then Jeremy’s, tears leaking out under closed lids. He speared Gavin with a look, the younger guy lifting his free hand to gesture innocence. Alex blew air out of his nose and cocked a head at the door. Gavin got the hint, leaning over and kissing Jeremy’s forehead.

“Whoever you are Lil’J, doesn’t matter. You’ll always be one of the lads.” He murmured and Jeremy opened his eyes to see Gavin grin that lopsided grin at him before he moved away. Alex took his place and with kind voice, hands and eye’s checked Jeremy over for damage. He had been lucky, the wound not reopening but he was given some more painkillers and Alex prompted him up in his bed, surrounded by pillows, some donated from the other rooms.

“Al?” Jeremy asked sleepily, the painkillers at work, a sneaky extra strong dose. Alex hummed an acknowledgement somewhere beside him.

“What will happen to them when Geoff finds them?”

“What do you want to happen Jeremy?”

“I think I want to do it.” Came the soft answer, the lad starting to drift. Alex pulled the sheets up a bit further, brushing some lint from settling on Jeremy’s face.

“Do what bud?”

“I want to kill them.” Jeremy sighed out, head lolling to the side as he slipped into sleep.

 

Ryan grabbed the first one he could. Some prostitute bitch from an alley. Geoff had apologetically sent Michael to babysit, but he ignored the muscleman, barely acknowledging his presence. The two bitches saw them coming, Vagabond, looming out of the night, Mogar with his diamond bat right behind. They tried to run but he was too fast, gripping a wrist tight enough to snap it, pulling them back into his arms. Mogar sprinted by, his bat slamming into the second sluts head with a wet thunk that was ignored.

Ryan cradled the screaming woman in his arms, her fingernails scratching uselessly at his jacket and his mask, unable to touch the skin underneath. Securing her with one hand around her arms and chest, he pulled out his knife and sunk it into her breast, almost trying to stab himself with the amount of force he put behind it. She shrieked and writhed but he was stronger and more determined, pulling his knife free and sinking it back in repeatedly until the cries started to die down. Refreshing blood ran down over his jacket arm and he spun her at the last moment, pulling her head back to see the death throes in her eyes. She stared at him, and he snarled when the light died and all he could see was Jeremy’s warm chocolate brown gazing at him accusingly.

Michael came back, his bat across his back, money in his hand, which he was counting. He looked up as Ryan threw the useless body away and turned on his heel, stalking back to the car. He sighed and pocketed the rest of the cash, not even pausing to raid the other dead bitch. He got into the passenger side just in time, Ryan tearing out of there fast enough to set them fishy tailing.

“So we heading home?” he asked, not really believing he’d get a yes so not surprised when the skull shook it’s head.

“No. I need another. Better than that.” Michael shrugged, looking out the window as they flew through the streets. He watched as the city slowly disintegrated into the shady parts of Los Santos, where the lower gangs ran the scene. He sighed as Ryan threw the brake on, sliding into a park and getting out in one smooth motion before the car had fully settled.

“Geoff’s not gonna be happy if we start a gang war.” Michael cautioned, joining Ryan at the back of the car, trading in his bat for the arsenal in the back.

“Geoff said work off my rage. This is going to work it off.” Ryan said simply, ignoring the body armour Michael thrust at him until he dared set a hand on his arm.

“Let go Michael.” He said low and dangerous but Mogar wasn’t going to back down.

“Put the armour on asshole. We can’t murder those fucking traitors that backstabbed Jeremy if you’re fucking dead.” Ryan growled but gave in, putting it on then grabbing his gun back from Michael.

“No survivors.” He said and Michael nodded, his own brand of madness twinkling back at him.

“I can get behind that.” He said casually, the two heading into parking spaces formed by two apartments where some assholes dressed in white with green bandanas tied somewhere on their person. Ryan hefted his AK and started gunning them down with no warning, Michael sticking close to his side as the decimated everyone within radius of them.

They killed twenty gang members, seven bystanders in that fight. The last living person was trying to crawl into cover as the two FAKEAH members walked casually around, Michael pocketing cash and picking up stray crates of drugs to load into the car as Ryan dispatched the wounded. Ryan grabbed him and turned him onto his back, that frightened face looking up at him. He tore off his mask, exposing the face beneath unpainted in his hurry to leave the apartment.

“Why won’t you just me mine huh?” he asked the green clad gang member, slowly bleeding from gunshots to his calf and arm. He lifted a fist and slammed it into their face, cartilage protesting under the hit. Ryan pulled him up by his shirt, the face he saw wasn’t the gang at all but a broader, friendlier face with a spill of freckles and brown eyes that laughed.

“I moved you in because I wanted you with Me.” he explained and hit them again.

“Your mine yes but I’m yours too!” this one split skin, blood flecking onto his face as the unfortunate stand in spat blood.

“I care about you!” pain lanced from his knuckle, a tooth, now sent flying, having gashed the skin.

“You almost dyeing almost killed me!” They fell unconscious but Ryan keep punctuating his sentences with another blow, turning a human skull into a soft mess of blood and bone fragments.

“I need you! I want you! Your mine! I’ll kill anyone who tries to take you from me! They’re dead! Do you hear me!? Dead! I won’t let anyone hurt you ever again!” With that, he dropped the mess onto the ground, his hand already swelling from the force it had taken to smash a skull. Michael lay a hand on his shoulder as he panted, blood splattered all over himself, his face practically painted as usual but with gore. Michael offered him the vagabond mask casually and he took it with a shaking uninjured hand.

“You got to use your left from time to time.” Michael commented and Ryan laughed at the absurdity of it. He got up with a grunt, Michael helping to steady him until he was straight again.

“I’ll remember that.” He said back, then pulled the mask back over his face, the plastic a cool second skin. Michael patted his shoulder, looking him seriously in the eyeholes.

“Feel better?”

“Much actually.” Michael grinned and they stepped over the chaos to get back to the car, shedding their weapons and armour into the boot.

“Awesome. Now let’s go home and in the morning, you can man it up, and tell Jeremy all that shit you were yelling. Just between you and me though, maybe you shouldn’t deliver it the same way.”

“What? Beating him into pulp?”

“Yeah. Good for therapy, bad for relationships.” Michael joked, sitting in his seat and tipping him a wink as he started up the car, “trust me, I should know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! i'm pretty happy with this and where it's going. Going to admit it, was a teeny bit stuck when B team split off but i figured it out thank goodness and here we are.  
> tell me what you thought, i am always open to sudgestions and see you soon..ish


	23. Change of plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Humanising monsters is hard,  
> things don't get any easier for Matt and trevor,  
> something doesn't add up to a certain bored idiot genious in a backwards cap

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do i love you guys, or do i love you guys? For my recent commentors, you guys inspired me to write this chapter so quickly!  
> LibbyBell and OokamiTenshi (of course) love the theories and reactions you guys have almost everytime! (ganglyLimbs where are you :,( )  
> Daggerstar, talore, and Xanzs thanks for the encouregment!  
> and all my many Kudosers ( -jaw drops- 43? holy crap i can't beilve how many people are saying they like my nonesense lol)  
> Enjoy the next chapter!

Ryan came into Alex’s room still fresh from the shower. His damp hair stuck to his forehead, those baby blues shining at him, for once no left over paint outlining them. His shirt was likewise sticking to him in dark patches, his skin still tinged pink. Jeremy had been sitting up, playing his PSP with Alex, the gent pausing the game when Ryan knocked, and entering without waiting for a reply.

“Hey, mind if I talk to Jeremy for a minute?” he asked, politely. alex looked to Jeremy who nodded and the red headed second stood up, taking Jeremy’s PSP with him as he left. He paused beside Ryan and said quietly, “You be nice to our lad.” He didn’t follow it up with a threat; he didn’t need too, Ryan understanding the gesture. He tipped his chin in acknowledgement, turning to face Jeremy who and folded his arms over his chest, dressed only in pyjamas pants, fresh bandaging white against his skin.

“Hey.” Jeremy said cautiously and Ryan gave a small wave from his hip, shedding every part of himself that was a ruthless killer to be just...Ryan.

“Hey.” He said slowly then pointed at the chair Alex had pulled from the lounge room to sit on, “May I?”

“Since when have you ever asked me?” Jeremy said scathingly and Ryan sighed, the comment a fair one.

“I’m asking now.” He pointed out and Jeremy relented, letting Ryan come sit close by him. Ryan ignored the chair, taking Jeremy’s permission as he could sit anywhere, choosing to sit on the side of the bed, next to Jeremy’s hips. He leant his elbows on his thighs, clapping his hands together once.

“Ok, so look.” Ryan started after a moment of silence, Jeremy’s eyes burning the side of his face with their intensity, “I’m not good at the whole human thing? I think I mentioned that?”

“Once or twice.” Jeremy was still being cautious, not letting up an inch from his high ground.

“Well here’s the thing. I may possibly have some slight, very small amount of maybe human feelings for you.” He shrugged, spreading his hands like he didn’t know what to say, watching Jeremy’s face react. The sniper gave him nothing to work with, his poker face absolute. Ryan knew he was waiting on more so he pushed through the darkness inside him, screaming at him to just shove his prince back into place.

“And maybe I don’t quite know how to express said hypothetical feelings.”

“I’d start with admitting they’re not hypothetical, Brainac.” Ryan flinched at the Brainac part, his dark self snarling as it triggered his rage but he fought it back down, the light he had taken last night helping keep him firmly in control.

“Please don’t call me Brainac.” He pushed out, Jeremy softening as he knew that request had come from the buried Ryan. Ryan took a breath capitalizing on the fact Jeremy had given him feedback.

“They’re not hypothetical.” He said and looked up into Jeremy’s face fully, “They’re real. No one else is like me Jeremy and trust me; we went through alot of fucking crazies before we settled on this crew. I’ve seen more than my share of nut jobs in this town. They’re close, but no dice.” He shifted, turning slightly so his body was facing Jeremy now, his eyes widening, like he was seeing Lil’J wake up again like the first time.

“You Lil’J. You ARE like me. What’s more, you actually LIKE me... No one likes me. Not really. Right down to the very pit of their stomachs is fear. People, at their core, fear me. But not you.” His little speech was working, Jeremy understanding what it felt like to only be liked for the mask you wore, or in Ryan’s case, feared. His arms slowly unfolded, Ryan edging up the bed as he spoke on.

“Even as I worked in front of you, beat you, carved into you, traced your skin with my knife. Never did you actually fear me.” he looked between Jeremy’s eye’s begging silently for understanding, neither of them knowing when Ryan had gotten so close, one hand over Jeremy’s torso, leaning into the mattress on the other side, boxing them in together.

“I need you. I need you to be mine Jeremy. No wait,” he stalled as it was Jeremy’s turn to flinch at a loaded word, “I promise you now. If you’ll be mine, I’ll be yours too. You say the word and I’ll obey. I’ll do anything, ANYTHING... to keep you with me my prince. Be mine. Please.”

In the end, it didn’t matter. Ryan may be the worst thing that ever walked into Jeremy’s life but he couldn’t walk away. Ryan's first ultimatum still stood. Whatever either of these men thought, there was no choice being offered here. Ryan was as helpless to keep Jeremy trapped in their twisted relationship as Jeremy was to nod his head and let Ryan claim him once more.

Outside the closed door, Alex listened in, waving Michael by as the Lad came out of his room to head for breakfast. When he paused, opening his mouth to speak, Alex threw a finger to his lips and waved him on. Michael just shrugged and shuffled past, figuring if Alex’s a voyeur then it didn’t affect him.

Alex listened intently to Ryan’s speech, then smiled softly when he heard Jeremy agree, biting back a chuckle when he heard the lad suddenly demand that Ryan ease up before he caused Jeremy to break the new skin over his wound. Alex felt a tap on his shoulder and saw Geoff looking at him questioningly.

Alex shooed him away, both gents leaving the door now, heading into the kitchen where Gavin sat on the bench, Michael digging in the cupboards for breakfast cereal.

“What’s up with the peeping tom deal?”

“I wasn’t peeping, I was listening. And I think they’re going to be just fine.” He smiled at Geoff who couldn’t help smiling back, happy his family were going to be ok. They still had to deal with the fucking traitors but that could come in time, Alex telling Geoff that Lil’J was coming around last night, finally finding his anger.

“Weetabix, you know? You pour sugar on the top and have at it.” Gavin was saying, Michael grumbling as he presented Gavin different boxes, the lad shaking his head at each one.

“Well we don’t have fucking weet a brick or whatever so do you want lucky charms or not?”

“Oh god, not this argument again.” Geoff said mildly, leaning on the bench beside Gavin who grinned at him. They playfully pulled the shit out of Gavin, Michael passing out different brands, divvying up what people wanted as Gavin tried to defend his argument. A was almost smug as Jeremy hobbled up, Ryan by his injured side, ready to catch him if he fell. It turned out not to be necessary as Jeremy pressed his palms to the counter, balancing himself and having a small rest.

“I’ll have the good cap’n crunch thanks chef.” He joked and Ryan shoved Gavin off the counter, making more room for himself and Jeremy. Gavin ended up on the floor, everyone breaking into laughter as he squawked indignantly and pulled himself up.

“The hell Ryan?!”

“Well, you insult my buddy count chocula, your gonna get floored.” He shrugged, smirking as Gavin brushed himself off.

“Mental! Mental! They’re all names of people! Bloody Americans!” he trilled to the chorus of his crew laughing around him. Jeremy was feeling much better, happy to be home and joining in the fun again. Ryan’s promise was almost as good as the golden glow. His fingers did twitch at that thought though. It had been awhile since he’d taken in a good kill. The holidays, despite the headshot he had done, then all that time in the hospital, then Caleb’s clinic. It had taken time, time that had eaten away at him until his darker self prowled just under his skin, handicapped by his weakness.

Ryan saw the way Jeremy held himself, the way he pressed harder into the counter then he needed too. He noted the way his lad was staring at the crew, making intense eye contact. He knew how long it had been and knew from experience how short tempered Jeremy was likely to get soon. If he did, then Ryan also had the solution.

Jeremy was his, and he was Jeremy’s and together, they we’re going to be a partnership to be feared.

 

Matt only had to deal with depressive slump Trevor until the computer blew up in his face, singeing his beard and sending a shock through his fingers that had him cursing and crying as he flung himself back. He landed on the floor; chair rocketed to the side and stared at the hissing plastic on the table, still connected to the power point.

Dimly he didn’t realise Trevor unplugging it until those long soft arms were around him, the smell of sour whisky strong in his nose as Trevor rocked him. Trevor’s voice, slurred and gentle in his ear, telling him he was fine, he was going to be ok. That everything was going to be ok.

He let himself believe that lie for the night.

The next day he rose second, his heart lifting to see the space where Trevor had lain naked upon the dumpster mattress they had appropriated was empty. He got up, jumping into his own pants and trotted out into where they had set up their impromptu kitchen, Trevor sitting cross-legged in front of the camper stove heating up a can of beans for breakfast.

“Hey. Sorry, this was meant to be a surprise. Such as it is anyway.” Trevor said a little guiltily when he noticed matt watching him. Matt smiled and came over, sitting close and taking the spoon from the still unsteady fingers of his remaining brother.

“You're meant to stir it, not poke it.” He informed him, smiling at the look of understanding on Trevor’s face as Matt stirred the pot, some beans sticking to the bottom. They ate breakfast in companionable silence, not wanting to be the first to break the moment. Of course, all the weight of the world couldn’t be held at bay for long, so when Trevor’s eye stopped on the blown computer he sighed out, lowering his bowl.

“This is hopeless isn’t it?” he asked, even more alarming to Matt because he knew Trevor wasn’t talking from his dark place, just acknowledging the facts.

“You weren’t around for the early days Trev.” Matt tried to comfort him, “Jeremy and I have been in worse scraps.”

“Name one.” Trevor looked at him in condescension and matt grinned.

“The perfection incident.” He said confidently then went on to tell the tale of when they had broken into a closed down arcade only to find the Perfection machine was the only one game running. They had also stumbled into a drug deal and had to become invisible within the dim too avoid getting their heads blown off. Jeremy, ever the daring one, had snuck around, pushing his chances, Matt only seeing a glimpse of his head here and there from his own hiding spot.

“Cute, but not the same matt.” Trevor said after they finished laughing. Matt sighed and nodded.

“I know man but we just- We just can’t leave him there.” Trevor groaned as he got up and extended a hand to his shaggy friend.

“All right, well in that case, I’m going to see what you didn’t explode and send you out with a shopping list.”

For the next week, Trevor put together a working computer from dumpster dives and steals matt did. Once that was up, he got Matt to steal hunting and camping supplies, tranquilizers and anything that could knock out and keep down a full grown man. He also put together little devices he lovingly called, beep devices, the inspiration ironically coming from Vagabond’s take on a practical joke. It had ended bloody and Gavin was furious, having to throw away an entire outfit and Ryan stealing his kill.

They didn’t have a plan as such but Trevor was working on one, swinging from one extreme to the next, in one of his creative, positive manic episodes. In a way, it was just as infuriating to matt, the man always shifting, bouncing, talking and refusing to sleep. He’d walk about, gesturing wildly, his dark hair ruffled back as he lectured, spitballing to an audience who had heard it all before.

“Ok so we take the safe house, go in guns a blazing! Die hard style. You yell ‘We’re back!” and Jeremy will take Vagabond down and-“

“Trevor, we’re doing this against his wishes remember?” matt answered frustrated but resigned as Trevor spoke over him, caught up in a delusional episode.

“Geoff will be all like ‘Oh your crazier then a bag of dicks!’ or something but it won’t matter cause I’ll like blast him, and be all ‘Not our Jeremy asshole!’ and we’ll all high-five cause that would be sweet-“

“This is not the stealth we agreed on.”

“Then Gavvers is cool so he’ll be ‘team lads now fellas’ and we’ll all have drinks on the roof and Geoff will say-“

“I thought your killing Geoff?’

“’Oh your guys are awesome as dicks, so glad vagabonds dead, wanna be main team?’ and we’ll-“ Matt sighed and shook his head, getting up to get Trevor a drink, the man not having paused in his pacing for over an hour now. When he turned back he froze, Trevor still rambling on, not noticing what matt had. A woman sitting on the couch leant back on the arm, a knife twirling in her long fingernails.

“Hey guys.” She said and Trevor ignored her, still going until matt threw out a hand, blocking his way. Trevor snapped out of it a little, staring first at matt then the bottle in his frozen hand.

“Oh thanks.” He said brightly, grabbing it and taking a drink, his mouth surprisingly dry. He furrowed his brows as he took in Matts face then turned to see what he was looking at.

The bottle dropped as he focused on the woman smiling at him, waving her free hand once. He lifted a hand to wave back and Matt smacked it down. The woman chuckled and pulled out her phone, texting something to someone as they waited for her to kill them.

“Relax guy’s if I wanted to kill you, you wouldn’t have seen me. In fact, I wouldn’t have to even do it myself.” She looked up, her blue hair framing her face, her glasses glinting, “I heard all I’d have to do is tell your own crew where you are.”

They both stayed quiet, causing the dangerous creature on their couch to roll smoothly so they were kneeling on the couch cushions, head pillowed on her folded arms over the couch back. She grinned at them, still that knife in her hands, drawing attention.

“Please, let’s talk. Mostly on why fine talented gentleman such as yourselves would be splitting from a crew ‘no one ever quits’” she threw up the air quotes, deepening her voice mockingly, she gestured to them, with her free hand, her face becoming friendly once more, “Aren’t you all butt buddies in boss Ramsey’s little lair? A family or whatever?”

Matt was weighing options, checking out exit strategies through his peripherals, remembering the creaking outlay of their shitty hidey hole. He slowly wrapped a hand around Trevor’s wrist as a crazy idea came to him. He didn’t know who this woman was, but he knew she had the same madness in her eyes he had seen in Vagabonds, the same honeyed voice as Gavin... the same confidence in her weapon as Jeremy. He had no doubt if they didn’t start talking then she’d make them talk.

He had been in this world since he was a child and had no illusions that this slight, bright, slender woman wasn’t someone who could take two full grown men apart piece by piece. As such, he edged Trevor with him; her eye’s following, her smile falling.

“You’re not thinking of leaving me here alone are you? Rude that is” she tisked and he stopped his shifting.

“Ah, well. We just don’t know you and-“

“Stranger danger and all.” Trevor put in and matt nodded, forcing a smile that didn’t stick.

“Yeah, right. That. Stranger danger. So we thought we’d just, you know, head out. Stay alive. All that.” She smirked and shook her head.

“No, sorry but you’re not going anywhere. Stay.” She ordered and Matt obeyed, pulling them to a stop. He taped the floor with his foot in a nervous gesture as she got up, tight leggings clinging to her long legs, a shirt that left little to the imagination clinging to her chest. She wore a harness over the top of it, throwing knives similar to the ones Mica had a habit of wearing under her clothes, lining her sides. She also had a gun at her waist and another hilt sticking out behind her head.

The two guys gulped, Matts hand slipping from Trevor’s wrist to squeeze Trevor’s hand instead.

“So, what’s the go guys?” she asked, coming around the couch then over to the computer, looking down at the screen, “Trouble in paradise?”

Matt took a deliberate step towards the exit, flinching as a knife flew by his cheek, slicing him before it buried itself in the wall behind him. Her hand was still extended, her eyes still on the screen as she clicked through.

“Last warning, do not approach that door.” She said, voice dead then brightened again as she smiled, “Oh! You got alot of files here, watching your crew huh? Seems they’ve been sticking close to the upper regions. Sticking close to base Hmm. Any chance you want to tell me where that is exactly?” she looked up, took in their closed expressions, and sighed.

“Guess not, well let’s see here... small sighting in Vinewood... Been shopping in Rockford hills... a little party in Rancho, shame I wasn’t invited...Only twenty dead huh? Pfft amateurs...” She mumbled to herself, clicking through the stuff they had collected, trying to find out when Jeremy was cleared for active jobs again. As she did, Matt tugged Trevor’s hand to get his attention. Trevor looked down at him slightly, keeping his face facing the woman giggling and clicking at the computer. Matt tapped his thigh, making him take a reluctant shuffle to the side, Matt pressing his toes into the floorboards carefully as they shifted. The woman looked up and frowned briefly at them making them stop again but they weren’t heading to the door so she was confused.

“What are you doing?” she asked suspicious and Matt shrugged nervously.

“Nothing, just ah, peeing a little honestly.” He said and she snorted.

“I like you guy’s, your funny. But stay still or the next one sticks into flesh, I guarantee it.” She said another thin blade in her hand again. Matt nodded as she looked back at her stuff.

“Jump left.” He muttered, the woman looking up again frowning.

“I’m not deaf.” She said, her voice dead again and Matt threw caution to the wind.

“Jump, Jump now!” Matt yelled and through some miracle, perhaps the years Trevor spent as a slave making him obey or perhaps the bond they shared with each other and their missing brother syncing them closer than two other people have a right to be, they both jumped and came down hard, throwing their weight down onto the creaking boards to Trevor’s direct left.

The boards splintered and they had no time to enjoy the shock running across the hitwomans face as they fell down into the lower story of the warehouse. Muscles jarred, Matt landing on his feet, years of practise from jumping low roofs kicking in, and he pulled Trevor up from where he landed hard. Trevor had tears in his eyes but Matt spurned him on, shoving the taller man into making his body move as bullets sprayed at their feet.

A low thump indicated she had jumped after them, a knife narrowly sailing into the door moments after Matts head had past backing it up. Matt and Trevor tore into the side alley, dashing and knocking over items, swearing when bullets started dinging after them.

“Car, car, car!” Trevor chanted, swinging open the door to their stashed elegy after he skidded around a corner, jumping in at the same instant matt jumped into the back, not bothering to get around the car. Trevor slammed it into drive, tearing out, the tarp and junk they had obscured the car with, falling off as the woman turned the corner of the alley. Glass shattered and they were screaming, Trevor’s arms coming off the wheel for a moment, futilely protecting his head from lead flying into the car.

“Fucking go!” Yelled Matt and Trevor took off, swerving best he could as they got distance between themselves and the deadly woman.

“What the fuck was that!” Trevor screeched near hysteric, his legs and ass throbbing from the floor, his face and arms stinging with a thousand tiny cuts, a numbness spreading through his body as adrenaline did its job fuelling his flight reflex.

“I don’t fucking know! Do I look like I fucking know?! Fuck! Fuck! Was that fucking terminator or fucking something! What the fuck!” Matt was equally banged up, sure he’d sprained his wrist and pulling glass from his arms. Trevor just drove, not slowing until they hit the ocean highway, heading out of Los Santos. Matt was still cursing and rocking in the back, then when he saw where Trevor had taken them.

“The fuck man?! Where the fuck are we going?”

“Out of fucking Los Santos Matt! This shit is insane and way over our fucking heads and we’re out!” Matt stuck his face into the front, yelling in Trevor's ear.

“But Jeremy-!”

“FUCK JEREMY!” roared Trevor, swinging out at Matt, knocking him into the back seat.

“He fucking chose them!”

“You said he’s choose us! You said he’s been brainwashed! You said we could get him back!” Matt accused, pulling himself into the front, blood smearing on the seats from the lacerations down his arms. Trevor shook against the wheel, thumping it with a fist.

“I know what I fucking said!”

“He’s always come back for us! He always comes back Trevor! We are not fucking leaving!” Matt put a finger in Trevor’s face, the car swerving dangerously, spinning out traffic that tried to avoid them as Trevor shoved Matt back into the passenger seat.

“FUCK!” Trevor yelled, all his frustration, fear and angry in that one cry, “FUCKING FINE! FINE! I get it! Fuck!”

Matt started to calm down as Trevor yanked violently at the wheel, taking them down onto the beach where he could park, getting out and slamming the door, running hands through his hair, glass dust making him seem older. Matt panted in the car, watching through the broken windscreen as Trevor stormed over the sand then threw his arms wide.

“FFFUUUUCCCCKKKK!!!!!” he screamed long and loud until he ran out of air and fell to his knees, letting himself fall onto his hands, grabbing handfuls of sand in his fists. He stayed like that for a time, Matt following him out and sitting next to him, looking out into the ocean, arms on his knee’s as he waited.

“We’re going to die for him Matt. You know that right?” Trevor said after a time, his voice barely rising above a whisper. Matt nodded, still not looking at him.

“Yeah I know. But he would have gladly died for us once upon a time. Do you really want to live, knowing we left him to be owned? Left him to be brutalised by vagabond? Become what you were? What his granddad wanted him to be?”

“I am not, brave.” Trevor admitted, leaning back so his was kneeling now, sitting on his feet. Matt sighed and started to come closer, yanking out some splinters and glass from Trevor’s arm.

“We are when we need to be.” His heart broke as he accepted that with their first plan ending in Jeremy almost dyeing, their second high jacked by a mad woman, they needed some time.

“Your right. We can leave los Santos, But!” he held a finger when Trevor looked at him sharply, “We will be back ok? It’s too hot here for us right now, and who knows when Jeremy will be out and about again.”

Trevor nodded, the two just letting themselves throb in pain in the sand, watching the ocean come in slowly. They missed Jeremy like crazy, they could almost imagine if he was there. How he’d fall in between them now, chiding them for freaking out, helping tend to their wounds, teasing them for being so soft. It would be Jeremy who would brush out the car, load them up and find them a safe spot to hole up.

Jeremy was their protector and they failed to protect him when he really needed it.

 

Dollface was not happy, people at the base getting out of her way as she stormed past them towards the bosses quarters. She had shed her throwing knife harness and pulled back her blue hair into a bun, a small cut echoing the one she had given that shaggy idiot on her cheek where a splinter had flicked up. She was really not pleased she had to report that two morons had escaped her through sheer dumb luck.

Her angry stride was broken when her boss’s right hand men stepped up in front of her from out of an office, one hand in the air the other in a pocket. With his scruffy goatee and his backwards cap, he looked like he was trying too hard to be eighties. When she stopped, bowing her head a little in respect, he slid the other hand into his pocket, hunching his shoulders as he sized her up.

“Problem dolly?” he asked tone bored and she shook her head.

“Nothing you can help with Joel, I just got to duck in and see the boss.” Joel scratched his cheek talking in that slow drawl which drove her mad.

“Yeah see, “he sucked in air threw his teeth, Dollface schooling her expression into blank, trying not to let him know how much he truly worked her nerves, “I can’t let you do that. Yeaahh... He asked not to be disturbed... By anyone... No matter how tightly they dress.” He pulled a hand out to gesture to her outfit, Dollface’s eyes tightening just the tiniest bit in the corners. Joel smirked, having noticed and she conceded he’d won that round.

“Well I have news that Ramsey’s had a little in-house riff. I’m sure he’d love to hear about it personally.” She told him, folding her arms and lifting her chin, determined to get it through that thick skull that the news she had is imperative.

Joel just rocked his hips, still sounding bored as he drawled, “In house riff huh? So you got evidence huh?”

“No, but I did-“

“Witnesses?”

“Two, that-“

“Where are they?”

She bit her tongue, trying to stay calm, that insufferable smirk never leaving Joel’s face. She opened her mouth, looking away from his expression less she do something that might get her killed.

“I don’t know.” She forced out and Joel's eyes widened, leaning forward.

“What was that?” he asked sarcastically, his rank demanding she answer as if they both didn’t know he had heard her.

“I don’t know where they are.”

“Huh? I couldn’t quite- your gonna have to speak up, my ear’s they’ve been playing up lately, mixing left from right, very confusing so-“

“I lost them ok?” she cut in to his jokes Joel rocking back on his heels.

“You lost them? Well I’m sure they we’re trained professionals, skilled in the art of escaping such talented, hmm, women... such as yourself.” Dollface had to say it, at this point suspecting that Joel had either had her tailed or done it himself. Suspicion or not, he wanted to milk the humiliation from her so she had to describe what had happened.

Really, it had been luck. Trevor had been known to her, his services so well done that sometimes FAKEAH hired him out to the mercenary groups. It was a long convoluted process but simply put, since Dollface was officially a mercenary, even if she was currently aligned with the Rooster crew, she ended up with Trevor doing her identity. She had gone disguised, prosthetics changing the shape of her face, her hair covered by a skintightcap, the wig perfect. She had even worn her contacts that also changed her eye colour.

Thus, when she had passed what she assumed to be a homeless boy, she recognised him but not him, her. Curious why a FAKEAH would be out, taking junk from dumpsters, she had followed him. He had met up with an even shaggier person and the two had headed home with their spoils. Once they we’re there she listened in as they sorted out their haul, had dinner then watched as the one she knew started to pace around. Through his blathering she put enough together to know she wanted to hear more details. The right details.

Intrigued, she had gone to her vehicle, armed up and went back. Only for them to slip through her fingers because of faulty flooring. That and their longer legs ate up the distance when they were scared. It was a fluke, something never to be repeated.

“You found two henchmen arguing in a shitty attic, bitching about their boss and you want to disturb our boss to tell him that? And that you also lost them so he can’t ask the questions he needs too?” Joel spoke slowly like she was an idiot child who had just presented him with a page of scribbles declaring it was a flower.

“Are you trying to get me to do stuff?” he asked, his tone and stance not changing but when you’ve been a mercenary as long as Dollface has, you can sense danger. Danger was now causally straightening out, his arms falling to his sides, his head tilting. Still bored.

“Cause what it sounds like, to me anyway, is you want to stir the boss up. When he gets stirred up, he orders me to do stuff. I don’t like doing stuff. In fact, do you know what my job is here?”

Dollface shook her head, actually thinking back to realise how odd it was but Joel’s job has never been clearly defined to her. Weird, but Joel was talking again.

“Exactly. And I like it that way. So let’s keep it that way huh? So you, toddling along, turn around, turn around doll,” he spun a finger, nodding his head at her when she didn’t move. She huffed and rolled her eyes, clenching her fists when she felt him smack her ass, “You just head on out, find me something to actually be bothered about. Huh? Go, go, go.” She looked over her shoulder to see him shooing her, the danger now passing back into amusement as she started stiff legged to walk away. She clenched her teeth hearing a smug chortle from behind her.

Oh, she’ll get him something to be bothered about. She would so fucking give him something to be bothered about.

Joel watched her walk away, pleased with himself at successfully diverting Dollface. That charming girl thought she was hot shit. Millennial's were so cute at times. He folded his arms, nodding to himself before he turned on his heels and went back into the office, slumping back into his comfy chair and throwing his feet up on the desk, looking over the surveillance feeds once more. He gave Dollface a little wave as she passed one camera to another, a cheeky gesture made no less amusing by the fact she couldn’t see it.

If there was one thing Burnie hated, it was people bringing him news. Well, the boss said he needed to know but every time someone brought Burns, news he couldn’t act on, Joel had to get busy. And who needed that noise? So Joel did his best to make sure that the only news that got through was news Burns could act on. Full and complete reports, evidence and witnesses. Something more concrete then ‘I followed a lower member of FAKEAH and heard them bitching vaguely about their higher ups.’

Joel snorted, folding his hands behind his head, readjusting his feet. Please, if that had truly been something important, he’d eat a block of gold. He watched the busy little bee’s of his crew going about their business, the whole place secured up to the nines. When you’re at the top, you need to get that kind of security or people will walk all over you.

Still, here Joel sighed and rubbed a hand over his face thinking, if Dollface was right, and there was something going on at FAKEAH HQ, maybe a little busy work now would save him alot later. Burns was getting really irritated at the reputation their former member was building. What used to be just a cute little cry for attention was building into something that could actually threaten Burnie’s control over Los Santos. And in-directly, cause Joel’s workload to, well, exist.

He sighed again, pulling out his phone and flicking it open, refusing to join the rest of the world in the twentieth century. He picked out a number for his Intel guy and dialled.

“Hello Mr Heyman what can I do you for or can I just plain do you?” came the sultry tone of Jon, the Intel guy and resident forger of their crew. He also made a nice little side profit, turning over stolen art or passing of fakes as very expensive reality.

“Why is everyone gay now?” Joel muttered and heard Jon chuckle.

“Get with the time Joel, it’s not about the gender, it’s about the who.” There was a clutter and Jons voice sounded slightly muffled as he yelled something about fragile at someone else, Joel already regretting the call, “Sorry about that. So Mr boss person. How can I help you?”

“Look, I may or may not have some sort of lead on some sort of something.”

“Clear and precise, it’s why I enjoy our conversations so much Joel.” Joel rolled his eyes amused at Jon’s satire but never admitting it.

“I just want you, to keep an ear out alright? Apparently, there might be some little drama playing out over at the FAKES. Just, let me know if you hear anything alright?”

“Hear anything about some sort of drama with the FAKES? Joel, do you not watch the news?”

“yes.” He answered quickly, finances being a part of the news, the only part, he watched.

“Clearly not lately. Like, what? Three weeks ago? Give or take a couple days, FAKES had some poor smuck for ransom, and it got paid by the boyfriend. This being Los Santos however, the victim got knifed as they were leaving the area. Guess the FAKES didn’t like the exposure the happy little reunited couple got because they shot out the hospital, wiping out a floor of cops and taking off in a Valkyrie from the roof. Down town was shut off for like two days cleaning up the mess. Plus, that couple is still missing.” Joel furrowed his brow, wishing he’d just had left well enough alone.

“Ransom?” he mused aloud, hearing Jon shout a few more orders before becoming quite enough to listen, “That’s not normally FAKE style. More of a Funhaus thing right?”

“Well Funhaus did do a hostage situation around the same time.” Joel nodded, rocking side to side in his chair, thinking.

“Odd.” He finally said out loud, then made a decision.

“Ok, so I’m going to need everything you have on this whole ransom thing. News reports, police files, everything. Also, track down that couple alright? Even if they’re dead I want to know why they were target by the fakes in the first place.” As he spoke, he heard a ruffling then the scratch of a pen, Jon making noises of agreement, “Then I want to talk to Funhaus, so get that set up. Under no circumstances are you to bring any of this too the Boss alright? We are fact checking before we go there.”

“Right, I can do all that for you in a jiff. I’ll forward everything I get to your email.” Joel pulled his feet off the desk, looking up at a screen with a smile.

“Actually, send it all too Gus. He likes puzzles.” He grinned, happy to make work for himself only to shove it on to the stressed out second, currently muttering to himself, glaring at a pad in his hands, making his way to Joel’s office.

“K, thanks bye.” Joel said in a sweet voice, hanging up the phone on Jon’s voice just in time to spin in his chair to face Gus.

“Joel, did you have the report I needed on the new exportation agreeance with-“ Gus looked up as he spoke, falling quiet as he took in Joel’s big smile. His frown deepened, face suspicious.

“Why are you looking at me like that? Whenever you look at me like that, it normally works out bad for me.” Joel still grinned, shaking his head side to side.

“Yeah, I didn’t understand anything you just asked me, but I’m happy Gus, because I got you a present.”

“It’s not another dead squirrel is it? That joke is so old, and never funny.” He said sternly pointing harshly at the man he’s had to deal with for fifteen years now.

“No, even better! I got you a puzzle!” He said brightly, announcing it like he just saved Christmas, arms up and eyes dropping to the electronic computer pad in Gus’s hand. Gus followed his look then back up.

“What?” he said confused.

Joel just mumbled, “Give it a second.” Arms still extended. They stood in silence for about half a minute, Gus’s glare intensifying as Joel’s hands slowly dropped.

“Ok, I was hoping you’d get the email but Jon must be-“ he was interrupted by the pad buzzing, Gus looking down and muttering, “Jon’s sent me an email marked, FAKE AH shenanigans? What’s that about?” he looked up to see Joel’s face was wide and bright, arms extended happily again.

“A puzzle present!”

“I fucking hate you Joel.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so this started off as a tiny little drabble of when harry meet sally, Dark Fake AH style and it's now evolved into this.  
> Really, thank you all. I don't beilve i'm a very good writer, that my style is to short, and my way of jumping around characters chaotic, then i see people commenting, saying they want more, they like it, kudos coming in and it almost makes me want to cry to see that something i wrote is actaully being enjoyed.  
> So thank you all so much, i cannot wait to put more out and hope it meets your expectations  
> (just you know, lower the bar a bit huh? I'm still working out the kinks and i'd rather not hit my head)


	24. Something brewing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a little meeting and a little letter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry but the editing was a little rushed on this one. so please forgive any mistakes i may have glossed over, i was trying to get it done between chores. Anyway only a teeny bit of violence in this one and supriseingly fake light for once. Don't worry, their my main guys and they'll be back next chapter raring to go!  
> Hope you guys enjoy as ususaul!

Bruce and Lawrence entered the restaurant and gave the name Jon had supplied them with at the host desk. The woman behind the desk had been looking at them with a snobby tilt to her nose and her eye’s tight with disapproval, specifically at Bruce. The moment Lawrence asked to be seated at the Heyman table however, her attitude changed.

“Right this way sirs!” she trilled brightly, becoming the very definition of respect, leading them a comfortable and private booth where she then asked if they wanted anything to snack on whilst they awaited the rest of their party. Lawrence waved her away politely; sitting down opposite Bruce who had flopped into his seat casually the moment, he knew what table was theirs. Once alone Lawrence rolled his eyes under his dark frames at his friend.

“Your outfit is bad enough; can’t you at least pretend you aren’t here against your will?” He commented dryly and Bruce shrugged, folding his hands together on the table.

“What? I told you this is a bad idea. We should not be having talks with Roosters while we’re aligned with Fakes. And my outfit is classy as.” He gestured at his shirt defensively wearing the never funny pretend tuxedo shirts untucked around worn in comfortable jeans. He did have a proper dress jacket over the top, something he thought was hilarious but no one else had chuckled yet.

Lawrence just gave it up as a lost cause, leaning in, keeping an eye out for anyone approaching the table as he spoke.

“Look, if the Roosters requested a little chat, I say we give them a little chat. No one says we have to bend over the table for them. What’s the harm in just seeing what they want huh?”

“Adam is going to be soooo pissed.” Bruce chuckled and Lawrence shrugged, leaning back now, putting one arm up on the back of the booth chair.

“Well, he misses out when he goes on his little side trips with peake doesn’t he?” Lawrence muttered and Bruce chuckled again, both men looking up when the hostess came back, leading a man who was less appropriately dressed then Bruce. He didn’t even take off his backwards facing cap, waving a hand lazily at Bruce to move over. The Funhaus man shuffled so this new guy could sit, the rooster immediately leaning his head back so it touched the wall, lifting a large hand to cover his eyes.

“Ok, so Darlene, it’s Darlene right?”

“Darla, actually Mr. Heyman.”

“Darlene, I’m going to need a big old glass of orange juice, a pizza, don’t care what kind just make it greasy, cheesy and here in five, and,” he lifted his head to blink blearily at the two Funhaus members he was here to talk too, “What are you guys having?”

“Ah, beer?” Lawrence said hesitantly and Bruce nodded his agreement.

“Yeah, beer’s fine, oh and do you have any of those cocktail weenie things? I love those.” Bruce added, the hostess bowing her way out, rushing to get their unique order. Joel, for it could only be the top Mr Joel ‘golden’ Heyman himself, put a hand on the table, tapping it in Bruce’s direction.

“I like the way you think.” Joel complemented him then chuckled, extending the same hand to Bruce’s shirt, “awesome.”

“Thank you.” Bruce said smugly, looking to Lawrence who rolled his eyes and decided to take charge.

“Mr Heyman-“

“Joel.” He was cut across and he corrected himself smoothly.

“Joel, Jon contacted us to request a meet up. He didn’t really expand on the why of it. We were hoping you could...” He asked politely and got a snicker in response. Lawrence cocked and eyebrow, sharing a quick glance with Bruce. Joel shook his head giving a happy sigh.

“Ever wonder why we’re here?” he asked but his tone suggested he wasn’t asking them rather repeating the question from memory. He chuckled again then shifted in his seat, leaning his forearms on the table and crossing his fingers together.

“So, you guys seem like my kind of people. Not gonna mess about, small talk nonsense. Good, because I got one hell of a headache, and I kinda just want to eat and run. Well not run, but defiantly go home.” They had no idea what he was drawling on about utterly confused by the man. This was one of the biggest baddest gangsters in Los Santos?

“See... A few weeksish ago, you guys held up a centre. Now that’s not unusual, being Los Santos and all, we all want our little fun,” he drawled with a smile moving his head back and forth as he spoke, “But it was just out of the blue... so what was that about?” He asked, looking between them so they couldn’t communicate without Joel seeing it. Lawrence spoke, Bruce giving him a warning look once Joel had focused on Lawrence and not himself.

“That? Oh, the J’s were getting a little bored so they wanted to race those animal things at the mall. Turns out, adults aren’t allowed on them,” he gave a little chuckle that seemed completely natural as Joel smiled, eyes searching his face as he spoke, Bruce leaning back so he could rub his beard, wondering why roosters were interested in that specific job.

“They may be immature assholes at times, but they’re dam good at their jobs so we let them have their fun you know?” Lawrence wrapped up, Joel still eyeing him disturbingly.

“Aha.” Was all he said then they sat in silence for a few moments before it was broken by the waiter coming by with their food and drinks. Joel became animated then, draining his glass immediately handing it straight back to the waiter with a request for more, then grabbing a slice of pizza and leaning back again. He looked to Bruce now, with a mouthful of pizza and widening his eyes at the cocktail weenies.

Bruce grabbed three, dipping them in sauce and eating as Lawrence sipped his beer. Joel chewed and swallowed then gestured to Bruce with his pizza.

“Your Bruiser Bruce right?” he asked and Bruce nodded, mouthful of food. Joel smiled and around another mouthful of pizza mumbled, “You worked the Callister job right?”

Bruce washed down his food with his beer then chuckled.

“Yeah, that was me! I know it’s old fashioned but you got to respect the classics right?” He grinned at Joel then at Lawrence who fixed his own smile on. Lawrence wasn’t actually a fan of the blunt way Bruce approached problems but Adam was the boss and if he wanted a couple of broken kneecaps given out, that was his choice. Joel was nodding admiringly at Bruce, putting a hand around the back of the seat behind the man.

“Tell me about it. You ever done the cement shoes?” Joel asked and from there they spent the next twenty minutes, eating, drinking and comparing notes on beat downs. Lawrence contributed only a little, his line of work was as the Intel and Hack man for Funhaus. He also tried to be the Plan Man but even Kovic, the boss himself, had a tendency to ignore whatever the plan said and just go with whatever seems fun at the time. Probably why Funhaus, though known, wasn’t quite at the same level as the Fakes yet. Certainly nowhere near the roosters, which made this little get together so strange.

“I like you Bruce.” Joel said, waggling a finger at the bearded man who clapped his shoulder in return.

“I like you too Joel. I told you this was a good idea Larr.” He added, winking at his co-worker who rolled his eyes at him. Joel laughed and leant forwards again, fingers gripping a fork so he could tap it against his glass rhythmically.

“You guy’s remind me of me and my friends in the early days.” Joel beamed at Lawrence, “Gus is just like you. Silent, Smart, always with the plan.” His tapping slowed as his face started to become less friendly and more smug, like he knew something they didn’t.

“Gus was meant to do this, talk to you fellas, but he made me do it. See, I’m the one who noticed the puzzle.” The Funhaus guy’s, both experienced hands at talks taking quick turns towards danger, recognised the energy around the fun, lazy older man had changed.

“There’s one, I would say crucial, difference, Between you, Sir Larr” Joel was speaking in a low drawl now, leaning back just as slow, Bruce shifting next to him, so more of his body was facing the danger to defend himself.

“Gus wouldn’t flinch if someone put this fork,” He lifted the utensil, “through my eye,” he mimed stabbing himself, smiling softly then tipped the it towards Bruce, “Somehow I don’t think you’d thank me like Gus would if I did it to Baby Bruce here.”

Lawrence lay his hands on the table, glaring at Joel while Bruce stiffened, preparing to defend from any sudden movement towards his face.

“I thought we were getting along Joel.” He said mildly, trying to keep calm.

“I just want to know what piece you’re holding for my little puzzle.” Joel said equally as mild, the fork still in his hand as he gestured. Bruce spoke up now, trying to give Lawrence a chance to slip away, himself already boxed in by the Rooster.

“What puzzle is that?”

“See, things aren’t adding up to me.” Joel said instead of answering, turning the fork over in his fingers absently, speaking as if he were only musing to himself and not two members of a different gang.

“First, Geoff shuts down a bare knuckle fight that should have gone on for another hour or two. Then, we hear about this ransom thing, Fakes threatening fags now.” Bruce flinched at the harsh word but Lawrence stayed still, listening intently and refusing to run without his friend who he had dragged here as back up. Joel ignored them both as he tried to fit the pieces Jon and Gus had discovered, together in his head.

“Except when you poke at it enough,” ever expressive, he jabbed the fork in the air in front of him to demonstrate, “Their back stories don’t add up. All the paperwork’s there, even job resume’s and Book face or whatever you kids are calling it. But when we go to where they supposedly work or live? Nothing...”

Lawrence shifted slightly as Joel’s voice trailed off into nothing, the man looking spaced out, staring at the fork in his hand, twisting it so it caught the light. Bruce shook his head just the tiniest bit, knowing Lawrence wanted to speak. Lawrence pretended not to see it.

“So did you want us to track them down or something?” he asked and Joel sighed.

“I just want to go curl up in my nice bed, maybe watch some flix, maybe take a nap, I don’t even know... But, people are poking around this thing with the Fakes. All I hear is Fakes this and Fakes that and if I’m hearing it, it means my boss is going to hear it, and if he hears it, well, I’m back to making cement shoes.” He looked at them with an open expression, encouraging them to answer whatever question he thought he asked. Bruce flicked a glance at Lawrence, making eyes at the exit but his bespectacled friend shook his head minutely.

“We don’t understand what this has got to do with us.” Lawrence said slowly and Joel sighed. Bruce flinched, throwing his hands up defensively as the fork flashed but it didn’t head for his face like he expected. Instead it had impaled Lawrence’s hand to the table, Joel leaning up, taking his hand off the fork to press against Lawrence’s mouth to stifle the man’s pained shout, the other pulling out a golden handgun that was pointed at Bruce’s face.

“I’m going to remove my hand in a second. Keep the fork in. We don’t want to cause a scene here, so think you can stay quiet?” he asked Lawrence in a soft low voice. Lawrence nodded, eyes beading against his will. Joel slid back into his seat, the gun dipping below the table but still pointed at Bruce’s gut. The fork stayed upright, Lawrence holding his wrist trying to still the shaking of his impaled hand.

“So, you guys want to try again, telling me what you were doing pulling all eye’s onto your little stunt before the fakes shot out the hospital?”

“Like Lawrence said man, it was just a bunch of us blowing off steam.” Bruce said, eye’s on the relaxed gunman’s stance, wondering if he’d be able to get to his own concealed weapon before he had air holes in his stomach. His heart clenched angrily to see Lawrence biting his lip, trying to stifle any sound as blood leaked slowly from under his palm and over the back of his hand.

“Ok, can we cut the bullshit here? The timing doesn’t add up ok? What are the chances you’d pull that kind of stunt, the kind that demands police attention, at the same moment Fakes were performing a very cinematic hit just six blocks down from you?” Joel pointed out, sounding bored and fed up, a dangerous combination apparently, especially since his headache had faded.

“This town isn’t as big as it seems at times! Beside’s that territory is unclaimed so we wanted a bit of fucking fun!” Lawrence bit out, Bruce backing him up.

“Look at our track record; we are not here to piss in a circle like you other crews. We are just out to have fun and make money, that’s it.”

Joel sighed and lunged forward again, ripping the fork out and letting it clatter to the table. Lawrence gave a little moan and pulled his hand to his chest, wincing. Bruce breathed a sigh of relief until the gun poked at his throat, turning his eyes from Lawrence to look into the dead brown of a man who had no morals of any kind.

“Bruiser Bruce, shoots up a mall for fun?”

“I was just backing my crewmates. That’s it. We swear.” Bruce said calmly, making his words smooth and his eyes open. Lawrence looked between the two, having wrapped a napkin tightly around his hand, not having brought a weapon himself, Bruce being his bodyguard.

Joel searched Bruce's face for a long moment, the tipped the handgun up then away from his face.

“Alright then.” He said easily and holstered it again. He turned back to the table and pulled the last slice of cheese to himself, ignoring the pool of blood or the stares of the two men he’d just threatened. He took a mouthful and leant back, smiling at the two.

“This is a nice place huh? Oh! Did you guys want some desert? They make a killer pie here.” He went back to being a man-child, excited for pie and waving over the waiter. The waiter came by, face paling at the blood on the table, taking in Lawrence’s white face and his hand pulled close, Bruce’s own serious expression and the happiness shining forth from Joel’s face.

“Can I help you sir?” He asked, his voice only shaking lightly.

“We need Pie. To go.” The waiter nodded and turned to leave but Joel snagged his wrist making the man jump and bite down on a shriek.

“Make mine with whipped cream on the side. Thanks.” He winked and let the guy go. He turned back to the two men and clapped his hands together once, rubbing them excitedly.

“So, you guys are welcome back anytime. I like you alot, very straightforward talkers and man Sir Larr, I’m impressed with your spine.” He grinned at Bruce who was still contemplating shooting this guy for what he had done. Only the fact that Joel had proven himself many times to this city to be one tough son of a bitch to kill, and the fact doing so would bring roosters down on all of them stopped Bruce from doing so. It seemed like Joel was satisfied with their answer, and if there was a way out of here with all three alive Bruce was taking it.

“Thanks I do try.” Lawrence said dryly, his voice sharp with pain. Bruce could almost groan at Lawrence’s sarcasm, no need to antagonise the man.

“Well good job. Don’t worry that’s how I greet all my new friends. Think of it... like a test! A horrible, stabby, messy, painful test!” Lawrence forced a grin to his face in response to Joel’s expectant face.

“I hope we passed?” he asked and Joel nodded as the waiter came back with three containers.

“Sure did, that’s why you get pie.” Joel said and got up, taking the top container from the waiter. He nodded to the occupants of the booth and took a step to leave before pausing and turning back.

“Sorry, almost forgot. It’s wash up day at home and slack for that.” He joked as he grabbed the fork he had used to stab Lawrence and flicked some of the congealed blood off. He then wiped it on the shuddering waiters shoulder then slipped it into the container.

“I’m borrowing this.” He said as he did it and the waiter nodded. Joel again made to leave then stopped. He turned the full way around to shake a finger at them like a big brother who caught out his kid sibling sneaking away with his game boy.

“If I find out, you guys were lying? That there was a reason for your stunt aligning with the Fakes?” his voice kept going up at the end of each sentence as he spoke, “well, let’s just say call me? If you want to change your story?” He grinned and waved.

“Later fellas.”

This time he did thankfully leave and Bruce ignored the waiter in favour of coming around the table to inspect Lawrence’s hand.

“Sir’s your pie?” the man sounded like he was going to cry.

“Do we look like we want fucking pie?!” Lawrence snapped as Bruce tenderly unwrapped his hand.

“If he finds out you didn’t take it, it’s bad for everyone. Please, you can’t stay here. You need to take the pie and go. Please.” He left the containers on the table and hurried away, Lawrence glaring after him. Bruce was biting his lip, carefully feeling the wound and shifting the bones as Lawrence cursed quietly and blood seeped. Inspection complete, he wrapped it up in a fresh napkin, much tighter then Lawrence had, helping him to his feet and grabbing the containers with his other hand.

“I don’t know if it was on purpose but it looks like a clean through, just perfect between your index and middle metacarpals. We’ll get an X-ray to make sure but I don’t think anything will be fractured or broken.”

“Geez Bruce talk dirty to me why don’t ya.” Lawrence muttered as they headed out quickly. Bruce tucked Lawrence into the passenger seat once he had checked the car for any type of bomb, sliding into the driver himself. As they sped away, Bruce shot a quick glance at Lawrence.

“So what’s the harm in seeing a rooster huh Law?”

“Shut the fuck up.”

They pulled up in their parking space for the club James owned, knowing with the renovations, the crew would be floating around inside today, everyone most likely arguing over what changes they wanted. Sure enough, as they entered, Lawrence heading straight towards the office where they’re medical supplies were stashed, Bruce found Joel and James arguing heatedly in the main space as workman watched on amused.

“Enough with the blue James! This is a club not the god dam ocean!”

“Blue happens to make my eyes pop!”

“Your eyes are always popping! No! We need a new theme and I think it should be Gala gold. Bring some curtains over here, standing table’s there. Maybe booths with some cushioning for once?”

“It’s my club Joel-“

“It’s all our club!”

“-so I say what colour the trimming is!”

“Ladies! Please!” Bruce cut in, voice cracking slightly. Both men fell silent, looking up at the boss while Adam was away. Bruce gestured to the office, with a wide look, the gesture really a command and the two grumbled their way past him. Bruce shook his head then turned to the workman.

“Ignore them, just follow the plan you were given.” He instructed and everyone got back to work. Spoole was behind the counter for the bar and smiled up at Bruce when he did a double take, leaning over the edge to stare.

“Spoole?”

“Ah, yeeeeessss?”

“What are you doing?”

“Did you know Adam keeps all the best stuff under his desk? Like taped under there? 007 style.” The young man snickered then sighed out. Bruce cocked an eyebrow.

“Are you high?”

“I’m not low” he answered snickering again. Bruce rolled his eyes and came around the bar, pulling Spoole up until he was standing.

“Come on, ya over grown puppy. We got a meeting.” He chided they went into the large office together. Kovic’s desk was enormous, thick dark oak and covered in monitors. One sidewall was likewise covered in monitors, all security feeds running to here as well as the security office. The other wall had beautiful olden style leather couches on which Lawrence was seating, a whisky in hand and the other extended to Elyse who was stitching him up and bandaging it properly. Joel was sitting cross-legged, reclined in the one seater, James was behind the desk, hands pressed to the top and shuffling through paperwork.

“I already told them the cliff notes.” Lawrence said as Bruce came in, shooing Spoole before him. Spoole went to Joel, sitting in the man’s lap and putting his arms around Joel’s neck as the older man wrapped his lengthy arms around spools middle. Once everyone was comfortable, Elyse sitting down next to Lawrence once her stint at nurse was over, and James coming to sit between her legs, Bruce paced in front of them.

“So if Lawrence filled you in, then you know we have a problem.” Bruce began, his crew focusing on him. He wished Adam and peake were here, but they couldn’t afford to wait around for them. They would be home soon anyway and Bruce would rather have some options to present to his boss, then the steaming pile of nothing they had now.

“We can’t pretend for a second we are ready to face the Roosters. So, we got a decision to make here. Do we sell out the fakes?” Bruce asked them for their opinions. This was not a democracy. The final say was always kovic’s. The chain of command was blurred here in Funhaus, everyone working together but when push came to shove, Bruce was Adams second and the one command never doubted was Adams as the boss.

“Whoa, whoa. Ok...So the guy got a little stabby. Haven’t we all? That doesn’t mean we need to be snitches or declare war.” James started out and Lawrence sneered above him.

“Little stabby? That’s my god dam hand James. And yeah, it kinda does narrow our options here. I for one really don’t want that asshole to find out we were lying.”

“Isn’t this your fault?” Spoole asked slowly and softly, batting his eyes at Lawrence who glared at him, “I passed you the email, didn’t mean you had to set a meet up today.”

“With Peake and Kovic away no less, let’s not forget that little number.” Joel added and Lawrence held up his bound hand.

“Hey! I’m the victim here! So get off my ass!”

“Ok, putting aside this is all completely Lawrence’s fault,” Bruce pulled the topic back to hand as Lawrence flipped him off, “Adam get’s back soon. Let’s have something to say beside’s we pissed off the largest criminal empire in los Santos huh?”

“Who's to say they’ll find out shit? We don’t even know why the hell they hit the hospital.” Elyse pointed out logically and Bruce clicked his fingers at her.

“Right. No, you’re right. We didn’t lie Lawrence so much as we didn’t tell the whole truth. Ramsey asked us to make some noise, everything else was winging it.” He smiled at Elyse who smiled back widely. James raised a hand and Bruce nodded at him.

“Why don’t we know what happened with the hospital thing? I mean, there was no warning this could turn into a gang war, so shouldn’t we know what we’re sticking our necks out for?” he asked and Bruce thought about that as Spoole now spoke up again.

“Is this sticking our necks out?” he asked in his winy teenager voice, looking around at the crew, “I mean, it was just a simple lunch right? He asked his questions and he left right? The end?”

“I hate to be a drama queen here Spoole but remember the part where hefuckedmyhand!?” Lawrence said quickly, holding up the offended appendage again. Spoole gave a lazy grin, waving a hand at him.

“Classic question technique. It was that or the thigh I’d say.” He chuckled lightly, the very picture of innocence. People would look at the crew and pick out absolutely anyone else but Spoole as their interrogation artist. But they’d be wrong.

“Ok, so maybe we’re reading too much into this?” Bruce asked for the general consensus.

“If you ask me boss-“

“Please don’t.” Begged Lawrence but James continued on.

“You should have a chat with Ramsey. Does he even know the roosters are investigating that shit? It was like what? A month ago? And hey, on that note, when’s the last time lads was here?” he asked and Funhaus turned it over in their minds before Spoole spoke up.

“Hey, yeah... come to think of it, I haven’t had an invite from Gavin in ages.”

“They have been pretty quiet. Like actually quiet, not shoot up the liquor store bored kinda quiet.” Joel said and Bruce frowned, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. He put turned his hand out, palm facing forward.

“Ok, this is what we’re going to do. Spoole,” he pointed at the kid who straightened in Joel’s lap when addressed, “You are going to invite team lads to a destiny raid tonight. Feel them out, see what they’re answer is.” Spoole saluted him with a grin. Bruce pointed to James next.

“James, you and Elyse are going to have a poke around their establishments tonight. See if they’re laying low in any of their own places.”

“Pub and club crawl! Nice!” Elyse crowed and they high fived, wedding rings clinking together. Lawrence lifted his drink having a sip as Bruce called on him.

“Yeah, yeah, I know. Check any records; see whose radar they’ve been on lately...”

“Right, also see what you can dig up on this mystery couple huh? Maybe we’ll see something roosters didn’t.” Lawrence nodded and without further ado, got up and settled down behind Adams desk, helping himself to the set up there. Spoole whispered something into Joel's ear that set the man giggling but Bruce stopped them.

“Sorry guys, I’m taking Joel with me.” He said and both pouted at him, “We are going to go to the hospital where this went down. See what we can dig out there. Gonna need your way with people Joel sorry.” Bruce explained.

“Can we leave in like half an hour?” Joel asked pleadingly, spool’s eyes impossibly big as they gazed at Bruce. Bruce groaned then pointed at the door.

“Twenty minutes.” He relented and they jumped off, speeding out the door Bruce yelling after them, “Don’t disturb the renovations!” James and Elyse weren’t too far behind the other two, Elyse taking her husband’s wrist and both of them buoyant with excitement.

“Shopping spree!” Elyse sung and Bruce called after them as well.

“Pay for everything! We don’t have time for a wanted level!”

“Naw, no fun Brucey!” James yelled back but the message was understood. He turned to see Lawrence looking at him over the monitors.

“What?” he asked defensively, the hacker shrugging at him.

“You look stressed.” Lawrence pointed out, turning back to his work.

“Oh do I? Do I Lawrence? I wonder why?” Bruce said sarcastically, pouring himself a finger of whisky himself then sitting in the love seat Joel and Spoole had abandoned. He pulled out his phone and hit Adams name to call.

“Your ass is mine just fyi Law.” He said, pointing at him with his whisky hand. Lawrence just grinned and continued to type one handed.

“Look forward to it.” He muttered as he worked, Bruce filling in their boss on the meeting between them and Roosters, hearing Adams shouting from where he was sitting. That’s what Lawrence liked about his position in the crew. He just made the plans, if they fell through it was normally Bruce who ended up wearing the ire of their boss. Oh, Lawrence would pay for it later, but he didn’t mind that part as much as he would if Adam came down on him.

 

Jeremy stood in the abandoned house of his brothers. Alex was with him, giving him some privacy after he had helped Jeremy get into the hidey-hole for this place. That’s why he had brought Alex with them. Ryan was waiting out in the car, furious but testing his promise to obey Jeremy just as much as the lad had to obey him. Alex wasn’t going to ask questions Jeremy wasn’t ready to answer; he just shifted the dresser in Matt’s room to expose the custom hatch the thief installed. Inside was empty, which Jeremy had been expecting along with the letter he had also been expecting.

He sat gingerly on Matt’s bed, laying back with the paper in hand, mindful of his side. It had been six weeks now since he had been stabbed, and he was recovering well. The wound still smarted and he had to be careful, no straining or lifting or anything that could potentially break the new muscle. Walking around however was fine, and laying down or getting up stung just slightly but was manageable.

He looked over the letter, seeing it was hastily written, the pen splattering slightly but Jeremy was an old hand at making out Matts messy scrawl. He lay down, Matts scent surrounding him, until he could imagine a soft arm around him, a scraggly kiss pressed to his neck. He sighed; pushing away memories of nights were the only sound was the two of them laughing with Trevor as they drew comfort as only three lonely young men could from each other.

-Jeremy.

First off, totally my fault. I didn’t mean to stab you man, I hope you can believe that. In hindsight, I guess it was stupid bringing a knife to subdue you but hey, we weren’t thinking clearly ok? We just wanted you to be quiet long enough to listen and come with us.

Vagabond is bad news Lil’J. What the hell would you do if you found out one of us were getting beaten and raped by a psycho? Man, you fled your old life so you wouldn’t be anyone’s slave remember? We just wanted to save you from that.

But hey, we fucked up didn’t we? I hope you found this yourself, that you didn’t tell your crew or that masked freak. In case this is the vagabond reading this, we’re just kidding man, your awesome and we are totally respectful of you.

But seriously Jeremy. If it’s not you reading this alone then we are already pretty fucking dead. And if it is then, remember us. Remember how we were? Your my brother Jeremy, always have been. From the moment I found you in that box, there’s been something between us that just doesn’t, doesn’t fucking have a label or a name. And it only grew when we rescued Trevor, our little threesome complete. The three amigos, living the dream.

Trevor is messed up over this and so am I.

We need you Jeremy. And you need us, we see that now. Never should have let you move out, biggest fucking mistake ever. I hope you find us one day, the you we remember, not the brainwashed slave. We love you Jeremy, stay strong and remember who you are.

Love your brothers

Trevor and Matt.-

Jeremy read it through twice then pulled out his phone, taking a picture. He saved it and put in his private pin. He wanted to read this again when he could think clearer. Then he tore the paper to pieces and slowly ate it, thinking carefully. He had a choice before him now. His old family or the new.

He just wasn’t sure which way he was going to go, everything was so hard to think about around the roaring that had been growing inside him. New family or old didn’t matter to him right now. What mattered was directly after this, Alex playing babysitter again as Ryan helped Jeremy pick out his gift. A soft little Edgar of his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> doing a little bit of time skips here to heal Jermey up and move the plot along, giving everyone time to catch up on the drama and how where they want to go. Shit is closing around the fakes at the same time shit is closing around matt and trevor so yehee! exciting lol  
> see you in the next chapter guys!  
> (ps sorry, my notes are a bit rushed, like i said, kinda busy atm, but i haven't forgotten about this don't worry i'm still writing where i can)


	25. Work waits for no man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> time to get back to work

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So ah, the gore is back just FYI, i warned you lol. So it's time for them to get back to what they do best... which is be monsterous murdering assholes!  
> once again, i'm no expert on wounds or on the effects of drugs so winging it on how quickly Jeremy is healing up and i figure, their gangsters so drugs just goes with the no moral thing.  
> Anywho enjoy!  
> No but really, our serial killer show is back and yeck... so seriously gore warning, i'm not messing around, they dispose of a body in the most thourgh way i could think of

Michael and Gavin were relaxing at a bar in their territory. They didn’t own the place but the owners knew them by sight. Not because the owners didn’t pay their monthly protection fee but because the lads frequented this bar as a favourite place to unwind without their normal over the top antics. The ambiance was nice and their private table was always free for them in the corner.

Both lads were drinking beer from the tap today, just to get a little pleasant buzz. To go with their high. Sometimes it was nice just to kick back and relax.

“Please Michael? It would be so easy and it wouldn’t take very long.”

“Not today gav.”

“Oh come on! I want it, for me? Come on, you know you want to do it too.”

“We are not breaking in to live invader offices gav!” Gavin sat back with a pout, Michael grinning and shaking his head, lifting his beer and tipping it at his best friend.

“Think of all that personal information! It’s just sitting there waiting for us.” Gavin tried to coax but Michael just laughed then waved at someone behind Gavin. He turned and smiled brightly to see their boss. Geoff came over with his own beer, the owner hovering around him until he shoed them away. He gestured to Gavin to shove over then reached under his jacket, pulling out a file and letting it fall to the table before he sat down.

“Hey Geoff!” Gavin crowed trying to give him a hug but Geoff held out a hand, pushing Gavin away. He didn’t like being cuddly in public, they did have a reputation too protect. Michael snorted and grabbed the file, pulling it towards himself, blinking past the drugs and alcohol in his system to focus.

“What’s this?” he asked, opening it up and spreading out the few pages inside it, looking over the information, eyes catching on the words ‘weapons drop’.

“What do you think it is? It’s a job idiot. Holidays are over and I need this done pronto.” Geoff said tapping the papers. Gavin reached out and snagged one for himself, both lads looking it over as Geoff drunk his first beer in record time and motioned the bar for another glass. When it came, the bartender knew better then to look at the files on display, just delivering the beer and some chips to go with it then leaving for their post again.

“Here gav, this one’s you’re thing.” Michael passed him the list of some sort of coding, trading for the page detailing the drop. Gavin swapped gladly then giggled as he read through.

“Oh, this is simple as Geoff. What? No challenge?”

“I’m giving you what was requested to me alright? So, the drop is happening tonight, in the hills behind Vinewood. Gavvers, you’re going to be highjacking the tracker alright? We want that drop to fall on our heads not whoever actually ordered it.”

“Who did order it?” asked Gavin curiously but his boss just shrugged.

“Why the fuck do we care? We’re taking it. Now, I’m thinking helicopter. Alex’s pilot, duh, and Mogar, your our gunman. Gavin is going to bring it in and when it’s dropped, he and Ryan are going to run out and grab the crates, load them into the car.”

“Where do Alex and I come in?” Michael asked and Geoff grinned.

“I might not give a fuck who we’re stealing from but I’m sure they’re gonna be a little pissed we’ve high jacked their shipment. That’s where you come in Michael.” Michael echoed the savage grin. Gavin looked through some more pages then pointed out another thing.

“What about you and Jeremy?” Geoff turned to him and shrugged.

“It’s only a four person job and Jeremy is still going through his physio. We’re sitting this one out.” He shrugged again and found the appropriate information, sliding it to Gavin.

“So when you got the shipment and no one’s following you, your dropping it here. Our buyers will be there at two am, so make sure you’ve lost the heat by then alright? You’re in charge of negotiation Gav but remember Alex’s boss, he gets to veto anything understood?”

“No problem boss. Want me to take the agreed amount or charge for any extras?”

“No, nice and simply. Take agreed upon. If they try to stiff us, well you all know how to handle that.”

Geoff phone started to ring so he put up a finger and turned away to take it. As he did, Michael and Gavin leant their heads together, discussing how they wanted this to go down. This is what they did, their job, stealing and trading, heisting and torturing. Best job in the world.

Geoff’s phone call was brief before he was turning back. Gavin was packing away the folder, Michael still spit balling wether he wanted to steal the chopper or order one in. Geoff suggested a steal; part of the reason for this job is the events lately had eaten away at their savings. Geoff only had a couple million left and that could get siphoned off quickly.

Jeremy being injured had stopped the main crew from going out. The others may have forgotten but Geoff was very aware that Hullum was out there quietly gathering power and losing sleep over McCormick not being as dead as he assumed. Then again, it could just be a mind game Matt was playing so Geoff would give him room to breathe. Then there was Roosters, Geoff getting reports that they’ve been sniffing around the hospital incident.

Geoff had a meeting with Kovic tonight; He was taking Jeremy for appearances sake and Mica as actual bodyguard. Lastly was the Crackerjacks were riled up at him about the two members he had now thrown through the blender, AKA Vagabond, and their bar that Team love and stuff shot out. Geoff didn’t give a shit about hurt feelings, having put his own wrath on the shelf while dealing with this traitor situation, but he hadn’t forgotten that Crackerjacks were dealing in kids.

It was tough being the boss.

As an added wrinkle, that phone call had been Lindsay, pushing at him to help her pick out his new identity specialist. The two assholes that had backstabbed Jeremy had left glaring holes in the operation of the Fakes and Lindsay was desperately trying to patch it while trying to keep up the appearance of normalcy. It was a rough time to be a Fake and Geoff needed this weapon drop to go well.

“Here morons.” He said and passed them a pick me up each. The two were flying high and buzzing with alcohol, and he needed them sharp. Michael swallowed his dry then washed it down without a word while Gavin twirled it in his fingers before closing a fist around it.

“I’ll take mine in the car.” He said and Geoff narrowed his eyes at him so Gavin lifted his arms defensively, “Hey, I take it now; I hit low just before nightfall.”

“That’s when you take another jackass. We’ll sleep it off tomorrow.” Michael said and Gavin gave in, flicking it up into the air then catching it in his mouth, raising his hands in triumph. Neither man had been looking and Gavin squawked in indignation as they ignored him.

“We’ll go pinch the chopper now then, have it ready by sundown.” Michael said, draining the rest of his drink and slamming it down, “Where’s Al? He should come with if he’s flying the thing.” Geoff sighed and tilted his head at Michael, Gavin still ranting about them missing the coolest trick shot of the year beside him, ignored.

“Where do you think? He wanted to make sure Jeremy didn’t push himself with Ryan's present.” Michael sighed and signalled Gavin to get up. The lad did, not bothering to get Geoff to move, just standing on the table and jumping off. Gavin turned and reached back for his drink, sculling the last of it before looking to Geoff.

“Hey, if those tossers are out playing and Alex’s watching them, who’s watching you?” This was a good point, Michael turning his glare on Geoff who had just looked away nonchalantly, drinking his beer. Michael leant on the table, tapping it with a pointer.

“We’ve been through this Geoff, you’re the boss, we get that, but that means you have someone with you at all times.” Geoff looked into the angry face of his muscleman, his hooded eyes smug.

“I’ve given you a job. You gonna Fuck off and do it, or are we going to have a problem here?” Michael stood straight and folded his arms.

“Problem for a hundred Alex.” Gavin muttered and walked over to the bar, ordering another pint. Geoff still smug, stood up and the two men squared off. Geoff pressed his face into Michaels, the other getting red and angry.

“You ain’t my mother. Your my employee and much more. So be a good boy for daddy, and leave.” Geoff said carefully, smiling affectionately down at Michael. He did love that son of a bitch, but Michael was getting more and more confrontational lately. Maybe it was the stress of almost losing another lad or maybe it was the fact he’d stopped messing around with strangers and crew. Either way, Geoff didn’t care, he just knew Michael needed a fight and he sure as shit would get one from Geoff if he didn’t back off.

Michael reddened, wanting to smash sense into that smug face. Geoff could sometimes be a little too relaxed about his personal safety. He was the heart of this crew, if someone took him down; the rest would combust into chaotic death. As such, the one thing everyone agreed upon was Geoff needed a bodyguard at all times.

“Geoff, your own orders were to stay with another crewman at all times. Who the fuck are you paired with?”

“My own business. Now go do that job I’ve given you. Before I get angry.” He kept up his hard look, refusing to blink first. Michael grunted in frustration and jerked his head down in submission.

“Fucking fine, but I’m dobbing your ass in to the other gents.” He told him irritated but Geoff just scoffed.

“Go the fuck ahead, Ryan’s busy with his boy toy and Alex gets sometimes I gotta just be free to be me.” Geoff laughed and put an arm around Michael, soothing the younger mans anger. Gavin saw that they weren’t going to go at it after all and messily downed half his drink, spilling it on himself and cursing as he caught up with them near the door.

“Beside, relax; I’m heading home now anyway. I want you to check in once you got the heli stashed alright? Then I’ll send you for the car pick up.” Michael nodded grudgingly as they split to different cars, Gavin snapping his fingers at Geoff and giving a wink.

“Righto, boss. Call ya soon.” Gavin said, getting in and barely closing the door before Michael peeled away. Geoff sighed and shook his head. Over protective bastards had to remember who was boss here. Geoff had been born into a life of crime. He knew how to take care of himself.

 

Alex was sitting on the stairs, the whole room lit up so he could read without straining his eyes. He had his iPod in, earphones drowning out most of the noise. He hummed along to his music, turning the pages softly, only glancing up to make sure Jeremy wasn’t doing anything that could make his injuries worse but for the most part, Ryan was seeing he wasn’t exerting himself.

“Do you want another one Edgar? I’ll let you choose since your such a good boy. Where do you want it?” Jeremy asked Edgar, in his hands a small brand, the circle at the end still glowing. Ryan was standing just behind and aside from Jeremy, trying to keep his lad happy with things that didn’t require anything from him in regards to strength.

“Please, no more. Please prince... No more.” The man sobbed, hanging from his chained wrists, his legs weak and giving out on him. His chest and back were a mess of burns of all different types. Heat was easy for Jeremy to handle, matches and brands requiring no effort to handle. Jeremy was growing disappointed with the results however.

“Have it your way.” He said and threw the brand to the side. Edgar sobbed with relief this time until Jeremy made to walk towards the selection. A firm hand on his shoulder stopped him, turning him so Ryan could frame his face with a large hand, blue eyes gazing into brown. Behind them, Alex looked back to his book, seeing Ryan had it under control.

“My prince?” Ryan asked him softly and Jeremy gave a small growl.

“This isn’t helping me. I don’t want him to scream any more majesty. It’s not want I want.” He tried to explain the frustration; his dark self-pressing into his eye’s his hands turning hard where he had gripped Ryan hips. His king pulled his face close and kissed his brow.

“Your too hungry to play aren’t you? I’m sorry; I should have given you a snack before the main course. How did you want to end this?” Jeremy looked over at Edgar, the man recovering slightly, putting his feet underneath him, and taking his weight once more.

“I want him to hurt.” Jeremy said, eyes glinting and Ryan understood. Jeremy needed to make a kill as helpless and in pain as he had been. Needed to pass on that pain to someone else. Someone who won’t survive it.

“Ok, for you my prince. Go pick out something final and I’ll secure Edgar for you.” He instructed, Jeremy pulling away to find something that called to him. As he did so, Ryan leant over and flicked the top of Alex’s book so he’d look up, taking a ear bud out.

“Were about to wrap up. Play defence for me?” He asked and Alex nodded, putting down his book and unhooking his iPod to lay on the stairs. Really, he wasn’t needed, Ryan having shifted victims around by himself before, but it was always useful to take advantage of a second defence. If a victim happened to get lucky and bolt for the stairs, having another healthy adult there to stop them was smart.

This time however, Alex ended up not being needed. It was simple for Ryan to pull back a fist and stun Edgar, easily unlocking him from the dangling chains and dragging him by the throat to the wall. The bed had been shifted, exposing the wall shackles. Desperate hands tried to fight him off but another stunning blow and Ryan had the wrists restrained within moments. He sunk another fist into the burnt stomach, driving air out and causing agony as knuckles skidded on blistered and melted skin. He secured the ankles then stepped back to admire his quick work.

“OK, ah, majesty?” Alex said, trying not to feel like an idiot addressing Ryan as such but it was his space, his rules, “If your wrapping up, I’m going to go upstairs. Do not let him overreach himself. I’ll be back in ten to check on you guys.” Ryan’s eyes were mad when he turned to Alex and graciously gave a royal wave and permission.

“Of course my loyal subject. We will not be calling on your services tonight I’m afraid. I will keep my prince safe, do not worry.” Alex again bit back a snort, knowing down here, Ryan bought into this king persona just as fully as he did the Vagabond on jobs. He bowed his head and collected his stuff, heading upstairs to check in on Geoff and whether he had given the lads the job yet. He didn’t want to witness this mess.

“Please. What does he mean? I want to go home. Are you going to let me go? Please, I’ll pay you anything you want. I’ll do anything you want. Just please let me go.” Edgar was crying, sucking in shaking breaths. Ryan waited in front of him, an eye on Jeremy who was bent over a tray, doing some deep breathing of his own.

“Hush Edgar, this will be over soon.” He pressed two fingers to Edgar's lips, cocking a brow at Jeremy, “Prince?”

At the title, Jeremy shuddered, and then snatched up a knife, a simple switchblade that glinted evilly. Ryan took a few steps back, wonder filling him as Jeremy approached the man bound to the wall. His eyes were blazing with madness, Ryan wondering if that was how he looked at times. Consumed by a darkness that roared forth from the eyes. Prince Jeremy had a face that promised pain, the knife coming up to prick under the jaw of Edgar.

“Have you ever been stabbed?” He asked voice harsh with anger. Edgar swallowed, his eyes wide and panicked, Ryan almost tasting the throb of life from the victim, the body reacting to the minds knowledge that death was moments away. Promised by the man standing before him with green tipped hair and murderous expression.

“I have.” Jeremy informed him, his hand shaking slightly. Ryan lifted a hand to his mouth, fighting the urge to tell his partner to calm down before he over excited himself. He recognised that this was something Jeremy needed in more than one way. He’d only intercede is it seemed Jeremy might hurt himself.

“It. Hurts.” He said slowly, shifting closer so his elbow had to bend to prevent the knife slipping into the neck. The point travelled down, skipping and occasionally catching on skin.

“Please no!” Edgar begged. Jeremy frowned, free hand tensing into a fist but Ryan stepped in before Jeremy could, cracking Edgar across the chin, more of a pain hit then a debilitating one.

“Silence while the Prince speaks!” he barked then stepped back, gesturing the stage was Jeremy’s again. He nodded to his king, having been saved from pulling at his new side muscles. He continued on, remembering as he spoke.

“It’s like ice at first. If the blade is sharp enough. You think ‘Oh, that doesn’t hurt so much’ before it starts to scream at you.” He let the blade catch and Edgar hissed then cried out as he sliced deep down through the burns carving a line from mid abs to hip.

“Oh god! No!” Edgar yelled and Jeremy added another slice. The blood was just what he wanted, the crimson enticing his senses. Here it was, the fuel of the body, leaking out over skin, coating them in a sticky layer within moments. Jeremy had bleed like this. His jaw clenched and suddenly he was hungry for it.

“Hurts don’t it?!” He yelled, doing a short little pace in front of Edgar, swinging his arm, ignoring when it pulled at the healing scar. Another sliced opened up and Edgar pulled his head back and shrieked.

“This isn’t even going to kill you! You’re just going to bleed!” he brought it down again, catching deeper, nicking bone. The knife fell from his fingers, his grip still too weak. Then Ryan had grasped his shoulders, stopping him from lunging for Edgar.

“Prince! Jeremy! Jeremy!” Ryan shouted and Jeremy shook his head, pulling his dark self back to concentrate. When he had focused on Ryan's face, His king shifted a hand, fisting the back of his head in the familiar claiming and calming gesture.

“You're going to hurt yourself.” Ryan said, his kingly voice thick with worry, Edgar moaning behind him in a sickening harmony. Jeremy shook his head again trying to clear it. It only took a moment of his king searching his eyes before he was released. The knife was snatched up and offered to him, hilt first. He grabbed it, bowing his head once to acknowledge his king.

Jeremy was just so angry. So hungry. He was empty of everything, the hollowness burning him. It was hard to remember to be gentle with his human shell when everything inside of him screamed for the kill. This Edgar wasn’t the one he was angry at, but he’d do for a replacement. No more messing about, Jeremy needed the light, needed it to fill him back up, needed to be full again.

Needed to do something about the glaring hole where his brothers once lived.

He growled and fisted the knife. He stepped forward, slapping a hand over the mouth, the other digging the knife deep within soft belly. With a grunt, he pulled it out then sunk it in again and again, the body jerking with each stab. The knife dropped when the belly was a mess of mutilated meat, and Jeremy brought his blood-soaked hand up to pull tilt Edgar's head forward, thumbs pressing back the lids so he could see.

Death took it’s time, shock serving to extend Edgar's agony. His eyes swam in and out of focus, Jeremy blinking furiously to clear his vision. Finally, finally, the light built, flaring bright and draining out from his victim into Jeremy himself. Strong arms caught him, lowering him to the ground, knees hitting the pool of blood as he leant back into his king’s embrace.

Golden energy burned bright, filling what was missing with its joyful glow. He shut his eyes sighing in relief as his high embraced him, wrapping him up in everything right in the world. All his anger and hurt at being betrayed, all his mixed feelings about Ryan and his confusion over which way to turn was washed away. He was alive, his heart thrumming in his chest, the light taking over, soothing his inner dark self so it’s whispers were momentarily quietened.

He let out a long contented groan, his body going limp as he let himself ride the wave. Ryan just rocked him, long fingers running down his body, peeling away the blood soaked shirt from his torso with zero help from the satisfied killer. Jeremy just slumped his back against Ryan's chest as the king gently lifted his arm and inspected the newly knitted skin on Jeremy’s side.

Once satisfied he hadn’t hurt himself, he let the arm come down and wrapped his arms around Jeremy’s midsection, placing his chin on his prince’s shoulder, waiting. It took some time but soon the prince stirred, voice thick with satisfaction.

“I missed that.” He muttered and Ryan grinned.

“I bet. It’s been what? How long since you last killed?” Jeremy lifted a shaking hand, pressing it to his face, accidently wiping the blood from his victim down his face but the cool stickiness was soothing.

“The girl I got us grounded for.” He murmured and Ryan sighed.

“Not even an Edgar. But we’ve fixed that.” He looked up at the body, limp in its hangings. Jeremy had made quite the mess, things that should stay inside the body slowly starting to press against escape, oozing out. The clean up was not going to be fun. Plus, he was on a timeline for a job.

So he coaxed Jeremy to his feet, the lad handling the high better each time he killed. His eyes were wide and excited, his feet buoyant and only a tad unsteady. When they were on their feet, Jeremy turned in Ryan's arms and grabbed his neck, pulling him down for a hard kiss, blood flavouring his lips in madness, just the way Ryan enjoyed it.

With a sigh, he had to press Jeremy back, shaking his head.

“Ah, my prince. I’d love to be with you, but unfortunately the woes of the kingdom sometimes cannot wait.”

“Please sire, it’s been too long.” He tried again but the king knew he wouldn’t be able to deny him a second time, so he didn’t allow the kiss to happen.

“No. Not now. Come, we have jobs to do.” He ordered and his prince bowed his head again in acceptance. They walked up the stairs together, Ryan hovering protectively. At the top, as he walked through the doorway, with the ease of practise he shed the king and became Ryan again. Just a man who was resined to the fact he had work to do when all he wanted was to relax on a couch and play the new gears.

“Go get showered up. You going to be ok by yourself?” He asked and Jeremy nodded, running a hand through his hair, tinging the green red. A little less practised then Ryan; he was taking a little to adjust.

“Ah, yeah. Should be fine. I might make it a bath though.” Ryan smiled at him and pointed down the hall.

“Just go get clean. We’re going to be twenty minutes or so.” Jeremy nodded then chuckled when Ryan slapped his ass affectionately. He passed Alex who was on the couch.

“Feeling better Jeremy?” he asked as the lad passed behind him.

“Right as Rain Al.” Jeremy said back with a grin, his torso streaked in blood and his face a macabre mask. Alex was just happy to see Jeremy coming back to himself and not in pain was a bonus. As the lad took off down the hall, Ryan snapped open a diet coke, Alex standing and attempted to crack his back.

“Need a hand?’ Ryan asked, tipping his can at the man. Alex nodded and Ryan came over, wrapping his arms around Alex and pulling and lifting him easily. Alex was a giant of a man and though Ryan was in no way a small man, it was moments like this that surprised Alex at how strong the killer was. He back made that satisfying pop noise and he groaned in satisfaction as Ryan put him down.

“Ah, much better. Thanks.” He waved a hand at the basement door, “Need a hand?” he asked intentionally echoing his fellow gents words. Ryan smiled and shrugged, picking up his diet coke again.

“Sure, if you’re not too attached to your outfit that is.”

“I got spare in the trunk. I thought with Jeremy not able to lift, I might need to help you if we’re going to make it back in time for our deadline.” Ryan nodded, pointing a finger at him.

“Smart. Bags are under the sink, I’ll get started.” He opened the door and went down, taking his drink with him. Hardened Alex gathered his stomach as he grabbed the large thick bags under the sink and followed him down.

This wasn’t the first time he’d disposed of a body but he always did hate it when it was this messy. A quick hit was fine, a late burial or a cremation. This though, Ryan wanted to make sure nothing could be identified. He was though and it was bad.

Alex came down and Ryan was moving all his carefully prepared trays aside, clearing the middle for the clean down. He started by untying the body from its restrains then dismembering it quickly. Once it was in pieces, he traded up the saw for a wicked looking knife. Now Alex came forward, trying to hold everything in his stomach as he held a bag open.

Ryan carefully extracted bone from flesh, throwing the bone into a pile and the meat in the bag. It didn’t take as long as Alex would assume, Ryan was practised at this. As he worked he sung ‘ulna’s is connected to the epicondyles’ which was very educational and helped serve as something to focus on rather than the wet sound of Ryan stripping flesh. Once he had stripped everything, Alex tied up the bags and placed them aside as Ryan picked up a sledgehammer and started in on smashing the bones into unrecognisable shards.

Alex gagged a little, the smell of marrow filling the air as Ryan's song changed to ‘High ho’ and he glanced up as Jeremy filled the doorway, in a fresh outfit and damp hair.

“You guys want some help?” he called and Alex answered.

“No, you can’t help. No lifting remember?”

“Do you even lift bro?” Jeremy chuckled and came down the stairs, carefully avoiding the mess Ryan was making. As his boyfriend started to scoop the mess into another bag, Jeremy edged around the wall closer to Alex.

“Please, I can work the hose while you guys get that crap out of here.” He commented and undid the hatch installed in the wall that had an industrial hose curled up inside. Alex helped him unwind it, but it shouldn’t be too hard for Jeremy to direct the stream into the drains all over the floor. He warned the lad not too put it on too high then started carting bags upstairs.

The place was hosed down, the bags packed into the back and the men all showered and changed into fresh clothes before they were ready to go. Ryan had put on his face paint, sitting in the driver’s seat with his mask on his lap. Jeremy got passenger seat so Alex could spread out on the backseat, legs up and leant against the door.

“Ahh, dam it. Geoff’s walking around without a guard again.” Alex commented from the back, checking messages. Ryan rolled his eyes and gripped the wheel hard, relaxing it when Jeremy put a hand on his thigh. He smiled at the lad but directed his words to the gent in the back.

“I love Geoff, but sometimes he drives me up a wall. I told you we didn’t need you out here Alex. You should have stayed and watched his ass.”

“Sorry, I happen to care about you guys.” Alex said back scathingly, lifting his hands and shaking them sarcastically. Jeremy turned to look into the back and wink at Alex.

“Thanks man, I ‘preciate it.” He said and Alex smiled back gratefully. He was happy Jeremy was recovering so well, the youngest lad always made sure to acknowledge everything Alex did for him. He would make a great Pet but Alex knew he was off limits. It was the only way the crew could work, by giving crew immunity from their various pastimes.

“You know, if we had a pig of our own, we wouldn’t have to detour all the time.” Jeremy commented to move the topic off Geoff’s carefree attitude and back to something useful.

“We are not getting a pig. If we got a pig, you just know, I’d be the one looking after it.”

“I’d look after Sir Oinkens.” Ryan said and Jeremy chuckled.

“Sir Oinkens?” he questioned and Alex was laughing in the back.

“Yes, sir Oinkens. Of the noble and prestigious Oinkens line.” Ryan joked defensively, the other two cracking up. The pulled into their chosen farm, Ryan pulling on his mask and Alex passing Jeremy his Stetson to hide his unique hair. Alex also jumped out, Jeremy heading to knock on the door as he couldn’t lift the bags.

“Ah! Wondering when you fellas gonna be back.” One of the O’Neil’s answered, Jeremy not bothering to pin the name, one slack jawed inbred as good as another. He just pulled out the prearranged amount and handed it over as the O’Neil tried to peer past him to where Vagabond and Alex were unloading the car and heading towards the pigpens.

“Hey, Remember? We feed your pigs, you don’t look at what were feeding them remember?” He snapped his fingers in front of the idiots face, drawing attention back to him.

“Right. My bad. Me curiosity does wants to know though.” Jeremy waved a bill and placed it on top of the pile he had handed over.

“Why don’t you just focus that curiosity on counting money huh?”

“No problem there. Ya’ll gonna be right showing yourselves off the property?” Jeremy pinched the brim of his hat in answer, smiling broadly.

“Till next time.” He said and the hillbilly grinned showing his meth stained teeth.

“No problems on our end. Whenever you want, you head on by ya hear?”

Jeremy turned and waved a hand, his crew finished tipping the bags out and just watching the pigs for a bit, watching the meat disappear down greedy throats. He joined them; leaning against the fence, out of range of snapping jaws. Alex shifted closer, so Jeremy hip touched his, Ryan on his other side, maintaining a distance while they could possibly be seen.

“Wow, they really go to town, don’t they?” Jeremy said full of awe, any trace of Edgar rapidly vanishing. Alex shrugged by his side then straightened up to go back to the car.

“Pigs will eat anything. Let’s get going huh? We got to drop you off then meet nice dynamite at the drop site.”

They went back to the car, turning their back on a human being now turned to pig feed without a second thought. When they got in, Jeremy took off his hat and turned it in his hands. Ryan pulled his mask off and placed it on his lap, starting the car and exiting the farm at speed. He glanced to the side, seeing Jeremy trace the stain on the brim absently as he stared out the window.

He reached out and put a hand on the back of Jeremy’s neck. Jeremy smiled at the controlling touch. Ryan was trying to prove he was willing to meet him halfway but it was clear, the older killer was always going to be in charge. Sometimes it was comforting however like now, the touch grounding Jeremy, easing the light that was still so fresh inside him. Gave him control of his own mind by reminding him he had someone else to answer too.

“Want to talk about it?” Ryan asked softly, Alex sensing a moment, putting on his headset again and pulling out his book. Jeremy sighed and looked up; earning a squeeze from Ryan that sent a tremor down his back.

“It’s manageable. I’m a little worried about being home alone with Geoff though. It’s not so... I dunno, overwhelming? Like I know what to expect now. Having you here helps.” Jeremy struggled to explain how he was feeling, the light was powerful and it was alot of concentration to ride the high, letting it lift him and make him smile without letting it consume him completely.

“Geoff can help you too. Doing this meet will help too. Concentrating on a job can focus the energy, make it work for you. Just remember to follow orders. And no getting trigger happy.” Ryan chuckled, and Jeremy nodded, grinning happily. His hands still fondled his hat and Ryan glanced at it again.

“Anyway, that’s not what I was talking about. I’m pretty sure you’ll be able to control yourself tonight. I was talking about that.” He nodded his head at the hat and Jeremy stilled his fingers, his thumb on the bloodstain.

“What about it?”

“You kind took it out on Edgar but your angry aren’t you?” Jeremy’s hands tightened then he threw his hat at his feet, not wanting to crush it. The light fuelled his anger as he went from deliriously happy to murderously furious.

“Of course I’m fucking angry!” he snarled and Ryan squeezed harder, a warning to get under control. He sawed in a few breaths, the tightness of his side only serving to make it harder to get under control. Ryan gave another squeeze and growled at him, “Calm down...” the audible order helping Jeremy focus again. Now calmer he let the words come as they willed.

“They attacked me. I trusted them more than anyone else before I met this crew. We’ve been through hell together. The fuck were they thinking? Ambushing me like that? How the fuck did they think that would end the idiots!”

“Maybe they were desperate?” Alex put in, having pulled out his earplugs to join in this particular conversation. He was met with angry growls from both serial killers that had him petting his sidearm for comfort but wanting to make his point.

“You know what they said Alex? They called me Brainwashed. They said I was nothing more than a slave. All because they’re jealous. Jealous that I was moving on with my life that I wasn’t at their beck and call. It’s all I ever did for those two was bail them out of trouble. Trevor with his mouth and matt with his stealing.” He scoffed, and shook his head, unable to remember right now all the good things, just the bad.

“Hey Ryan, ever wondered what was with all the scars down my dam legs? That was from dropping through a god dam skylight to save Matts ass from fucking museum security. The one on stomach? Almost got gutted taking a slice for Trevor, the bi-polar moron having mouthed off in a biker bar. Assholes only ever used me as a meat shield.”

“Come on Jeremy, I’m sure it wasn’t like that.” Alex said soothingly and Ryan snarled now, gripping tight enough on Jeremy to make him wince as he spat into the back.

“Why are you defending them Alex? Jeremy has a right to be pissed at those traitors!” His words stirred up Alex’s anger having him stab a finger in the driver’s direction.

“Hey, don’t think for a second I’m not shitted off too! I’m just trying to see both sides of the story alright? I refuse to push another Lad away! What do you think it will do to Jeremy if the men he grew up with became pig food?!” Jeremy flinched at the image; the idea of his brothers, no matter how furious he was at them, ending up like that was a disturbing image. He hated them, and he loved them. He wanted them to suffer and he wanted to protect them from suffering. He was shaking now and growling, not registering that the car had stopped until he was being pulled from it and pressed against the car.

Ryan enfolded him, embrace hard but not as hard as he’d like, his face being pressed into shoulder as the comfort of the grip on his hair, and Ryan's face at his pulse, teeth pressing but not entering skin. Just reminding him of his place, bringing him back to himself. His rage ebbed, Jeremy calling back on the fresh kill to help cleanse him of his pain. When he once again was enjoying the prickle under his skin and his mind blissfully blank of anything but the golden haze, he shifted, pulling his hands up to press against Ryan's chest, pushing him back.

“I’m cool. I’m cool.” He assured him and Ryan stepped away, searching his face.

“You sure?”

“Yes. Come on, let’s go.” He brightened, a bit embarrassed about his small break there but no one said a word about it. They got back in and Ryan started up the engine, Alex leaning forward and placing a hand on Jeremy’s shoulder.

“Sorry Lil’J. I didn’t mean to sound so harsh.” He said giving it a small squeeze. Ryan glared at the contact but at Jeremy’s warning look, pulled his gaze to the front. Ryan was protective of all his crew but he was learning when it came to Jeremy, that protectiveness was ramped up tenfold. He didn’t even like Crew to touch what he considered his, but Jeremy had made it clear he didn’t want their relationship to alter the one he had with main crew.

“It’s cool Alex. Let’s just drop it for now huh? They’re in the wind, and until my stupid fucking side can handle kickback, there’s nothing I can do about it yet.”

Alex let him go and Ryan immediately grabbed Jeremy’s neck again, needing the claim as much as Jeremy did. They drove in silence for the rest of the trip, only broken when Alex updated Ryan on Gavin's and Michaels prep progress.

Alex was looking forward to everything getting back to normal, this first step the job tonight. Ryan was wondering if when he found Jeremy’s brothers and he was looking no matter what the rest of the crew thought he was doing on his laptop every night, whether it would be easier to just make them disappear rather than let Jeremy have his revenge like he originally planned. Jeremy leant his head back against the seat and closed his eyes just letting himself go into the golden high, only Ryan's hand on his neck keeping him linked with his body, just floating where no worries could touch him.

Despite everything else in his life, it had been a satisfying kill.

Jeremy twitched under Ryans hand, casueing the gent to glance at him, the mans face twitching into a slight frown before it melted away into the bliss of a kill again. Jeremy had only just picked up on what Alex had said before he had implanted the terrible image in his head.

Push another lad away? What other lad?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked the Edgar cause they might be a bit busy to go into detail again for a bit ;) but it was an important kill for jeremy so it had to be done. Anywho, hoped you liked it, but you know, torture and murder is wrong kiddos and bad not to mention messy and time consuming.  
> I'm so super proud at getting this out so quick and no promises but keep an eye out because unless i get sideswipped by life, the next chapter is coming out quick.


	26. bad luck in snipers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Why they'll never let Jeremy go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So ah, warnings for sucideal themes and depression, angst and all bad bad head spaces alright? just, read carefully i guess. Time is jumpy again, this being a period over like six months or so ish just slowly building between graphs  
> Enjoy! hope you like it!  
> -Is chewing nails nervously-  
> ;)

“We are dead as dicks! I told you not to let him into the Jet!” Geoff screamed from behind cover that was turning more flimsy with each blast from the jet circling the airport. Alex was at his side, trying to shoot down the god dam Lazer with a petty rifle. Michael and Gavin, always together, had taken cover in a different air shed but they’re voices came in clear over the coms.

“We didn’t fucking let him!”

“Geoff, we were busy with those other knobs”

Vagabond broke cover, dashing from behind an aerial tower, trying to sprint for the helicopter before the jet turned around. He miss timed it, the chopper exploding in front of him, arms coming up, protecting himself from having mask melted to flesh from the heat.

“Oh fuck this guy.” He commented mildly, dashing back into cover. Geoff groaned and flinched from another blast just to the left of him. He looked to Alex who shrugged, both of them trying to think how to get out of this without dying. Then they’re attention was caught by one of the Lads stepping out from behind the shed, striding into the runway.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?!” Geoff roared heart in throat at the purple clad sniper. He was ignored, the jet turning and focusing on the exposed young man. He just calmly lifted his heavy sniper rifle to his shoulder, lining up the shot. They didn’t hear the shot over the sound of the jet but suddenly it was nose diving, hitting in front of the sniper, flicking up and over, falling to pieces as it dragged down the runway.

“Got him.”

Geoff didn’t think he could be more proud or more furious at Ray for that stunt.

“Do you just not give a fuck? Or do you have a death wish?!” Geoff ranted as he paced in front of Ray who was leant back on the couch in their safe house in Vinewood hills. The slim man shrugged, his glasses giving a glint in the light as Geoff’s pacing form alternatively blocked then let through the late afternoon sun.

“Yolo right?”

Behind him, Gavin sniggered and Michael elbowed him. Ray turned to grin at his Lads, the gents arrayed opposite them, Ryan leaning on the table, a diet coke in hand and his hair mussed up from being in his mask all day. Alex of course was standing to Geoff’s right, arms folded.

“No Ray, I’m serious. That guy could have blasted you to pieces in front of us.”

“But he didn’t, I got him. What’s the problem here?”

Geoff stopped pacing to rub his face giving a small groan before facing Ray again.

“The problem is, this is getting to be a habit. You’re our sniper, not our front man. Leave facing down enemies to Mogar and Vagabond.”

“It’s not my fault Ryan ran out of Rocket’s fucking around to the deal.” Ray’s tone was unrepentant and Alex had to put a hand on Geoff’s shoulder, calming the boss.

“Look Ray, we’re just concerned about you that’s all.”

“Well don’t be, I’m fine.” Ray said then shrugged again, “Can I go now dad? Only I got a school project to ignore.”

 

“Dude, were gonna get some bevs, wanna come with?” Michael asked, walking into Ray’s room, waving a hand in front of his face trying to dispel the smoke. Ray lay on his bed, ds held above him, not looking at his friend at all.

“Nah, I’m good here.”

“Come on man, Gavvers is gonna get floored, don’t make me witness that train wreck by myself.” Michael joked but there was no response except a slight shake of his head. Michael frowned and smacked a lazy leg, getting annoyed.

“You can at least look at me when you’re rejecting me fuckface.” Ray sighed and paused his game, coming up on his elbows to look at Michael with red-rimmed eyes.

“Have fun at the bar. Take Gavin's car, you’ll be swimming in the pink.” Ray joked by Michael rolled his eyes.

“Come on ray, team lad’s man.”

“Question, is the bar outside this house?”

“You know it is.”

“Then it would involve going outside. Hard pass.” Michael sat on the edge of the bed and Ray pulled himself up, long legs coming to rest next to Michaels.

“Well what about if we just stayed here then? Had a few with the gents and school them in COD?” Ray knew what Michael was doing, could see right through it.

“How many times do I have to say this? I’m fine Michael. Really and truly.”

“Stop fucking saying that!” Michael spat, throwing himself to his feet and pointing at his high friend who just smiled softly at his rage, “You're not fucking fine! You’re not talking to anyone, you’re more shut in then fucking usual, you’re taking all these fucking chances I mean god dam ray, the fuck is up with you?”

Ray just gave that infuriating shrug, turning his head away from Michael to pull his DS closer.

“You guys are reading way too much into this. I’m F-“Michael smacked the DS out of his hands and ray gave another slow sigh, looking up at the lad.

“Feel better?” he asked.

“No.” Michael admitted, fists tight, wanting to shake some sort of response from the laid-back lad in front of him. Not this wall of nothing Ray was giving him. What ray was giving everyone.

 

“Ray!” Ray looked up from his phone after the sharpness of Ryan’s voice cut through his brain. Ryan gestured towards his prisoner with the pliers still in his hand, a fingernail falling from them.

“I’m sorry are we boring you?”

“Well yeah, but nothing to be sorry about.” Ray commented mildly, looking back at his app, fingers tapping quickly to win. Ryan was momentarily stumped before he tossed the pliers on the prisoners lap and walked over to ray, making him look up when Ryan was in his space, eyes dangerous and hands forming a cage around Rays head, palms against the wall.

“How can I make this more interesting for you huh?” he said darkly, the hint of a threat in his tone. Ray was immune giving a shrug, looking down again.

“Nothing you can do Rye-bread except maybe speed this up so I can go.” Ryan blinked fast, unsure what just happened. Ray didn’t respond to him. EVERYONE responded to him here. He got his face in Ray’s, as close into his personal space as he could get.

“What do you suggest then?” He put as much menace into his voice as he could. Ray just rolled his eyes.

“How am I meant to know? Cut off his hand or something? I’m just here for the Intel on my hit, man, this is your job.”

That’s the moment Ryan saw it. As Ray so casually dismissed him, uncaring of the unhinged killer in his face, his eyes met Ryan’s.

There was no light. None at all. Not even the tiniest little spark to be coaxed into an open flame.

Ray was dead.

 

Gavin was surprised when Ray sat next to him one night, taking up a controller and joining his campaign without warning. Not that he wasn’t glad to see ray but it was just so out of nowhere, the sniper has all but withdrawn from the crew over the past few months. They had all tried to bring him back at one time or another but ray was adamant.

“So Vav, tell me… talked anyone to death lately?” Gavin was killed onscreen and as he waited on his respawn looked to Ray. The Hispanic boy had his eyes focused on the screen, body relaxed and nothing on his face indicating anything but a mild boredom.

“Ah, yeah. Alec. He off himself just two days ago. It was on the news.” He may be a bit confused as to the subject, but he warmed up to it, his enthusiasm stoked by the still present thrill of his latest victim.

“I met him at one of my support groups. He was finding life, pointless, meaningless. It didn’t take too much to convince him of the grand gesture.” He bragged with a laugh but receiving none. He looked to Ray who was focused on the screen. He frowned, concern blossoming past his thrill.

“How you doing ray?” he asked and ray shrugged.

“Eh, I’m living life I guess.”

“You guess? What does that mean?” he questioned, not really paying attention to the game anymore. Rays eyes were fixed to the screen, the action reflected on his glasses.

“You kinda fell into this life didn’t you gav? No one talked you into anything did they?” the question was random and Gavin scratched at his beard shadow as he thought about it.

“Well no. I just really like being able to convince people to do ridiculous things. I mean what’s more stupid then killing yourself right? Not many legit jobs out there that let me do that you know. So yeah I guess I did just fall into it.”

“Is it stupid though?” Ray asked and Gavin paused the game, forcing his friend to look at him, face serious.

“Wot are you on about?”

Ray gave a long sigh and threw the controller onto the couch between them.

“Is it so stupid to kill yourself?” he asked and Gavin spluttered, drawing back.

“Course it is! Self-preservation and shit man. Right? I can make them ignore millennia’s worth of instinct to survive. That’s pretty dumb mate.” Ray shrugged a shoulder, leaning an arm on the back of the couch.

“Not really. I mean, what you say to these people must make sense right? Futility of life and all. It works for you when you’re chatting them up anyway.”

“Yeah but Ray, these are weak willed people. I couldn’t make say, Geoff, just decide he wants to off himself in a day. The challenge is sweet when I do get someone willing to live. They’re the best but they take the most work.”

“You tried with us all anyway.” Ray pointed out and Gavin waved a hand modestly.

“Please, I’ll try everyone once.” He said cockily and Ray shifted forward, placing a hand on Gavin's knee, face more animated then it had been in months.

“Try me again.” He said quickly and Gavin blinked.

“What?”

“Talk to me again Gavin. Like you did when we first met.” Rays voice was urgent and Gavin shook his vehemently.

“No, no way. I won’t Ray. I can’t. I love you man, I love all you guys. You mean more to me then my family did. Now if you want a roll, I can give you a roll, but I won’t talk you into killing yourself.” He said, shifting forward to press a kiss to the lad’s lips. Ray drew back, eyes animated this time with anger.

“Do you think I’m weak willed huh? You think you could get me to do it?” he demanded and Gavin shook his head, face falling. He knew he was being manipulated but he couldn’t see a way out of it.

“Not at all mate. It’s just mental that’s all. I don’t turn on the tongue for my family. Don’t ask me to do it now. You may as well ask Ryan if you can sleep in his basement or follow Alex to his home. If you want to die, then go hit Michael in the frank and berries,” Gavin was getting mad now as he got defensive, it wasn’t fair of ray to ask him this, “Just don’t ask me to kill you because that’s what you’re doing!” Ray snorted and got up, shoving Gavin's shoulders away as he did.

“Whatever man, god you read too much into this. I just wanted to hear your spiel man, maybe help you refine it. Geez, freak out why don’t you?” He started to walk away, Gavin left confused hurt and angry. He jumped to his own feet, going after the lad that was withdrawing again.

“Oi! You can’t just talk like that then walk off!” he said, grabbing a shoulder and turning ray back to him. He gave a shout of pain and stumbled back as Ray hit him square in the nose.

“Hands off the merchandise Gavvers.” He said in his dead voice, not bothering to help Gavin, just walking into his room and shutting the door. Gavin cursed, pinching his nose and tipping his head back, stumbling into the kitchen to grab some paper towels. Once he had shoved some into each nostril, he pulled out his phone to call Geoff. He had had enough of this nonsense.

 

Geoff lay with Alex in his bed, both still catching their breath, Geoff’s arm under Alex’s head, their legs entangled as they lay on their backs. Alex shuffled a little closer, star fishing a hand on Geoff’s chest, the tattooed hand of his boss covering it, pressing it over his heart.

“Well I needed that.” Geoff sighed out and Alex chuckled.

“You know me, anything to help out a crewman.” He joked and Geoff chortled himself then found his mood turning to sober.

“What are we going to do to help Ray?” he asked his second, who readjusted his head, trying to buy time to think.

“I just don’t know. I’m not even sure what’s wrong. Michael is pissed off and you know he’s not going to help in another way then knocking faces in.”

“Yeah, Gavvers is worried Rays going to off himself. I don’t see it myself but that kids got the nose for this kind of trouble. “

Alex turned so he could hug into his oldest friend, squeezing a little uncomfortably tight but Geoff allowed it. He was also thinking back to when he asked Ryan if he was avoiding Ray. The man had looked at him and in that, low voice of his had said ‘I have seen roses damasked, red and white, but no such roses see I in his cheeks.’ This was both disturbing and worrying.

“What are we missing? What should we do? Should we just confront him you think?” Alex asked, voice lost as he tried to think of some way of reaching the lad before it was too late.

“I don’t know big guy. Maybe it is a phase. Rays always been a bit of an unfeeling bastard. Maybe he just needs space? He keeps telling us to back off.”

“Nah fuck that Geoff. We can’t back off. Not with him flirting with death every mission.”

Geoff ran a hand over his face, pushing his hair back. Privately he agreed, never one to do things subtle. He was just worried that if they pushed him, they’ll push him to the edge.

“Your right. We’ll talk to him tomorrow. We won’t let him blow us off this time either. He can tell us exactly what’s wrong or he can be grounded until he does feel like sharing.”

 

“I am not a child Geoff, you can’t confine me into my room.” Ray said mildly as Geoff stood before him where he sat cross-legged on his bed.

“I sure as shit can, just watch me.” Geoff told him confidently, “Unless you want to share with the class what exactly crawled up your ass and died?”

“Right now, the only pain in my ass is you.” Ray fired back and Geoff frowned, glaring at the lad.

“Fine. You can just stay in here until you’re ready to talk to us. We are just doing this because we care. Asshole.”

He left, taking with him, Ray’s stash of weed and his Ds and PSP. He paused at the door when he heard Rays voice mutter.

“You wouldn’t understand.”

Geoff looked back, eyes softening.

“Understand what ray?” he asked and Ray rolled his eyes and threw himself back into the pillows.

“Nothing Geoff. Just do us a favor, and leave.” He ordered and Geoff sighed, his heart clenching as he shut the door behind him. Alex was waiting in the hall, Gavin’s face visible where he was peeking through his own door. Geoff shrugged, holding his haul as evidence that it didn’t go so well.

Gavin looked down sadly then shut his door, voice being answered by Michael’s angry tone. Alex groaned and wiped a hand over his mouth.

“The fuck do we do now?” he asked and Geoff shrugged.

“Fuck, I guess we just wait him out? When he comes out for dinner, we’ll try again. It’s all we can do I guess.”

 

They didn’t see Ray again for three weeks. The little bastard escaped out the window, Geoff never considering he would run from them like this. The lads were beside themselves, searching high and low, Alex went around red eyed blaming himself and Geoff, when somber which wasn’t often, ranted about rays stubbornness, panic hidden beneath his anger. Ryan became practically mute, the vagabond persona coming into full swing at all times. Even at home he would wear the mask, staring at any crewmember that tried to speak to him until they left him be. They didn’t want to push another family member out the door.

They had never stopped looking for Ray, never stopped questioning people. The city went into a fearful time as FAKEAH tore up the place, searching for their missing member. The death toll was growing and everyone had an eye out for brownman, either to give back to the Fakes to spare the city or to ransom him. Then Vagabond came to his fellow gents with a message from one of his contacts.

“Brownman bounty $250,000?!” Alex read the message aloud, Geoff spitting the mouthful of liquor he had taken. The skull nodded slowly, his hands lax by his sides, seemingly uncaring but they all know he had not slept in two days now.

“My Merc contact says it went up three hours ago. Payable by dead drop once the news reports his death. No contact with the setter.”

“Who the fuck wants’ him dead so much?” Geoff asked the room, Michael folding his arms as Gavin dived for his computer, trying to back up the facts.

“What the fuck is he doing?!” Michael growled, hands twitching, face red, “He runs away, which is a dick move in any case, and now he’s majorly pissed someone off? When is he going to come home? How the hell can we help him survive the bounty if we don’t know where he is?” He asked their boss desperately. They all looked up to him save Gavin who was still typing furiously away. Geoff opened his mouth to speak but Gavin jumped up onto the couch, laptop above his head triumphantly.

“Ray set his own bounty!” He cried and was met with confusion. He jumped over the back of the couch, almost falling if it hadn’t been for Vagabond catching him, helping him straighten.

“Thanks rye,” he said absently then slammed the laptop down in front of Geoff, the others crowding around, “Look, I’ve been watching his bank accounts for movement and see here? Four hours before his bounty was set, Ray took out the same amount. Look at where he grabbed it from too.”

“The dead drop zone.” Alex breathed and looked to Geoff who looked back at him seriously.

“Why is he setting a bounty on himself? There are quicker ways to die.” Alex pointed out, heart aching at the thought of Rays death. Ryan spoke up then, startling them all with his voice they hadn’t heard in some time.

“He’s set a challenge up. This is for us. He wants us to find him first.” He looked around at his crew, their faces hardening into resolve. Geoff hit the table with a fist, making the laptop bounce.

“Alright then, let’s find him and drag his ass home.” He ordered to a chorus of agreement.

 

Ray waited with his legs dangling from the bridge. Far below the river rushed, taking the cheeto packet he let fall out of sight instantly. Next to him was his pink rifle, the weapon having been by his side for years. It seemed appropriate he keep it by himself now. Now he was saying goodbye.

“Ray. What are you doing?” Ryan’s dulcet tone came from behind the mask, making Ray shiver. He frowned, not looking back, knowing Ryan would know better to approach him too soon.

“Why didn’t we ever fuck Rye? I mean the whole crews sleeping with each other, why not the R and R connection?” He asked instead of answering. He heard a step behind him and a deep sigh.

“I got issues with being close to someone like that. I don’t want to risk hurting any of you.” Came the serious answer that made Ray chuckle. He looked up at the deep twilight of the sky, kicking his legs to feel the air rush by them.

“I got issues Rye. Period.” He commented dryly and Ryan took another step towards him. Ray turned to look at him now, the first to arrive here but in no way the last. Ryan extended a hand, his mask hiding everything from the lad who frowned.

“I feel like your mask vagabond. Big bad scary vagabond, heh,” he chuckled again shaking his head, “It’s a god dam Halloween mask. A cheap one at that too.”

“It’s not the image, it’s the fear it inspires.” Ryan explained, wondering why the lad cared so much but stretching fingers towards him, trying to coax him back, “Come home Ray. We can talk there about anything you want.”

“I want to talk about fear Ryan.” He shot back and Ryan lowered his arm, tilting his head, confused.

“Fear is such a big part of our lives. Alex’s scared for us, Michaels scared of being in control. Geoff’s scared of being fucking sober and Gavin's just plain scared. What about you? What are you afraid of?” Ryan took a moment as Ray watched him before he reached up and pulled his mask from his face. The face paint still hid his features but at least it was more expressive then the dead plastic.

“Losing the only people who accept me.” Ryan said simple and Ray scoffed, turning his back on him.

“Gay.” He said and Ryan got angry, he was brushing his humanity here and that always made him on edge. Then this asshole went and dismissed it as if it was nothing?

“What about you ray? What the fuck are you scared of huh?”

“Nothing. I am scared of nothing.” Ray said mildly and Ryan scoffed. In the distance, he heard the roar of Michaels altered car engine and knew the others weren’t too far away.

“That’s bullshit ray. If you’re not scared then why did you set that bounty? Why did you lead us to you? Why talk to us at all?” Ryan tried to reason but Ray leant back on his hands, looking at him once more as on the opposite side of the bridge, Michael pulled up, jumping out of the car with the rest of the crew.

“I wanted you all to witness. Though want is a strong word. More, I thought you should. So you would understand.”

“Understand Ray? What the hell do you think you’re doing? This tantrums cute and all but it’s time to get up and go home!” Geoff reached them first, crossing his arms and lacing his voice with steel. Ray sighed and stood up, leaving his rifle on the ground. He turned fully now, his heels brushing the edge of the bridge, his hands in his pockets. His crew looked at his precarious perch fearfully, knowing Ray was a good breeze away from a long fall and a cold drown.

“Look Ryan. The whole gangs here! And look at your faces. Your all so scared.” He laughed and pulled his hands out of his jacket so he could twirled them at his sides pretending his balance was gone.

“Stop fucking around and get off the dam ledge Ray!” Michael yelled at him, taking a hard step towards him but Alex threw his arm out to stop him. Gavin had pressed his hands to his mouth, eyes wide, for once speechless. He knew how to talk someone off an edge, but only the one side that had them falling.

“Michael your angry.” Ray pointed out grinning and Michael pressed against Alex’s strength.

“Fuck yes I’m angry! You can’t just fuck off for three weeks then set a trail that leads us to a god dam bridge!” Ryan shuffled so he was closer to his crew, everyone looking up at ray with different expressions. Michael obviously angry. Geoff was trying to be stern but Ray could see the pain in his eyes. Gavin was pure anxiety, not knowing what to do. Alex also had concern and love shine from his kind face. Ryan was hardest to read but ray knew that the killer was fighting his protective urges, having nowhere to channel them.

“Look at you all. You know you’re a bunch of sicko’s right?”

“Takes one to know one Ray.” Geoff said firmly, trying to remind him of where he belongs.

“No, you’re different from me.” Ray said slowly, a hand coming up to touch his face, fingers searching for something.

“We all have blood on our hands but you all still feel. Look at you now. You’re meant to be the monsters of Los Santos. But here we are, having a ‘moment’ because that’s what your emotions are telling you to do.”

“Ray, just come off the ledge and talk to us. Please.” Alex tried but Ray stayed where he was.

“Fear, anger, hate, love, loyalty. You have that. I just don’t. Don’t you get that?” he focused on Geoff, he voice pleading, “You gathered us up into one place Geoff. Your little crew of monsters. It’s wrong Geoff. What we’re doing, who we are… it’s wrong.”

“Wrong? What the fuck are you on about?” cried Michael and Gavin couldn’t stay silent any longer.

“Ray please, just come down here and talk to us, we don’t understand what you’re on about.” Ray pointed at Ryan who now shifted.

“Rye bread knows. Don’t you? Go on tell them.” He said begging for back up from the man he was most paired with.

“Why, then, ’tis none to you, for there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.”

“English Ryan.” Ray said with a roll of his eyes and Ryan stared at him, trying to will him down with his eyes as he translated, “Its a matter of perspective. Nothing is good or bad, only what the person believes.”

“I believe you’re full of shit.” Ray said, glaring at him then across the crew.

“We are bad. We are wrong. Am I the only one who sees’s it?” he scoffed and hit his brow lightly with his palm, “I must be because I’m the only one not blinded by emotion.” Alex took a step forward of his one, hand outstretched.

“You seem pretty dam emotional now ray.” He pointed out and ray shifted on his perch, making hearts leap into throats.

“No, I’m not. I’m being logical here. We need to die, all of us. Anyone like us, who’s broken enough to do the shit we do. I mean come on; we use the Ten Commandments like a check list.”

“Ray Narvaez Junior! We are not having this debate while you’re standing up there! Get down, now, and we will talk about everything at home!” Geoff’s worry broke through making his voice crack. Ray started at being so addressed then he smiled sadly.

“Geoff. Big Daddy Geoff. I told you, you wouldn’t understand.” He said softly. He sighed and reached out a hand, inviting Geoff to come forward and help him down. Relief flooded through them all, as Geoff smiled triumphantly. The shot came piercing out of the night, hitting ray, blood spraying onto Geoff.

Ray tipped back, not another word said as he fell, the water pulling him under the instant he hit.

“RAY!!” Four voices screamed, Ryan only roaring wordlessly before turning to see the mercenary on his bike, having roared up, taken the shot and about to speed away. The vagabond was furious and ran for him, startling the merc into gunning his bike. In an instant, Vagabond leapt onto his own and was after him.

Geoff was mute, taking the two last steps to lean over the ledge where Ray had fallen. His crew joined him quickly, Gavin talking nonsense about how that didn’t just happen, that he was dreaming. Michael was cursing, slamming fists into the concrete and Alex just shook his head to and fro.

“We failed his challenge it seems.” Geoff commented, voice dead.

 

Geoff fell heavily into the bottle. He didn’t even try to keep up appearances. Michael went out, coming home covered in bruises and blood, refusing to say what he had been up too. Gavin became a mute, sulking around the house, refusing to say a word or do anything. Alex tried to keep them together, but his family fractured apart around him.

Ryan was locked up once again.

Vagabond had returned with the mercenary, having dragged them home tied to his bike. Ryan took him downstairs into the cell beneath the house and as he finished the skinning the road had begun, Alex had locked the door behind him. Ryan could rage in there until Geoff could get his dog under control again.

Alex sat on the edge of his bed, and put his head in his hands. It had been two weeks since Ray had died. Ryan had descended into madness once more downstairs, as likely to eat the food Alex tried to provide, as he was to throw it at the gent. Michael was out again, doing god knows what but most likely in some sort of danger. Alex had just put Geoff to bed, the man black out drunk.

He started to cry, pulling his glasses off and throwing them onto the bed, sniffling as he tried to stop. He couldn’t afford to fall apart; he was the only one who could take care of the rest. He couldn’t let himself feel it. Feel the emptiness, the absence Ray had left behind. No more would he hear that loud and pure laugh, see the smug roll of shoulders or smell the sweet scent of roses mixed with the earth scent of ray’s drug of choice.

Gavin was stalking quietly through the house. He had made a promise that he’d never talk anyone to death again. It must have been him. He killed ray, with all his little speeches, all because he couldn’t keep his gob shut. He could hear Ryan roaring muted below them. Michael was out again, his remaining lad not speaking to him at all. He might not have even noticed Gavin's silence.

As he walked by the closed door of Alex’s room, he paused. He could hear sobbing, muffled but calling to him. He looked to the door, knowing that Alex was on the other side. The giant man hadn’t let himself cry since they had watched they’re brother fall. Gavin put a hand on the door and opened it, letting it swing wide.

Alex lay on his bed, face smothered into his pillow, telling himself to stop, that he had to get under control.

“Come one Alex you pussy. Stop fucking crying idiot.” He was hurting himself with his own words, Gavin recognising that more than anyone else. He couldn’t let Alex hurt himself. He wouldn’t fail again.

Alex started, fresh tears rolling over cheeks when he felt Gavin strip down to his boxers and curl into him, moving the pillow and letting Alex cry into that fuzzy chest. A long hand pulled him close, and a rough voice broke through his already cracked control, shattering it into a million pieces.

“It’s ok to cry Al. I’m here.” Gavin cooed, his words healing for the first time. Finally, given permission, soothed by the fact Gavin had finally spoken, Alex let go, deep full body sobs that cleared him of all the pain and grief that had been building. The whole crew was on the edge of self-destructing but now, with this first breakthrough, started the road towards healing.

Michael came home, limping and hoping no one would call him out on his strange walk. No one did, everyone having been avoiding everyone else. He hit the shower, washing himself thoroughly before getting out and into fresh clothes. Feeling better after a long night of punishing himself, Michael looked in to Gavin's room to find it empty. His heart stuttered and he flushed.

No. No, no.

He fought the panic, images of a dead and broken Gavin pressing into his mind. Just because Gavin wasn’t sulking around the house, didn’t mean he was dead. Michael ripped his phone out and dialled Gavin at speed. He cursed and threw his phone when it went straight to voice mail.

He thundered to Alex’s room, his only chance of finding someone who could help him, throwing open the door then stopping, relief and longing rushing through him. Alex and Gavin were curled together on the gent’s bed, sleeping without nightmares judging from the content looks on both men’s faces. Michael felt tears well and he wiped them away quickly before anyone could bust him. He pulled his shirt off and knelt on the bed, shoving Gavin who woke with a start.

“Move mute.” He ordered, Alex opening his eyes as the lads shuffled around.

“Michael.” Gavin cooed sleepily and Michael paused to hear his name so caressed by that accent again.

“You idiot.” He said affectionately, feeling the tears come again at Gavin's voice. Alex saw another cleansing cry coming and pulled Michael to him, Gavin cuddling in on the other side as the lads finally started their own grieving process. After the sobs had subsided, all three men got comfortable together, the bed kinda cramped but they wouldn’t have it any other way.

“I can’t believe he’s gone.” Michael said voice still harsh from his cry. Alex’s arms contracted around the lad protectively, Gavin giving a small whimper.

“He wanted to go Michael. We should have just respected that.” Alex said, putting his finger on the biggest guilt. Ray had wanted to leave, but they had chased him down. It was the crew that drove him to pulling the bounty stunt that got him killed. Alex personally resolved to never let this happen again.

The next day, Geoff groaned his way through his hangover, the lads now a team, helping Alex to bring the gents back. As such, they started with sobering up Geoff. It took two days of fighting, cursing, yelling, things being thrown and absolutely no drugs of any kind in the house, including alcohol. Finally, Geoff gave in, letting the lads comfort him, breaking down until three sets of arms were around him, rocking him through it.

“Why wouldn’t he talk to me?” Geoff wailed and Alex shushed him, Gavin hugging Geoff's middle and Michael draped over his shoulders.

“He wouldn’t talk to any of us Geoff. He didn’t think we’d understand.” Gavin pointed out and Geoff cursed, hitting himself in the chest with a hard fist, Alex catching it before he could swing again.

“Well I don’t get it! He was right! I don’t understand!” Gavin pressed himself into Geoff’s neck, his own voice catching.

“Neither do I. He was so strong, how did he give in like that?”

“He didn’t” Michael growled, his arms tightening on Geoff, Alex’s hands rubbing his shoulders as he growled.

“He was coming down; he was coming back to us. Just he was a fucking idiot getting our attention with a bounty. Stupid way to die.” He snapped his mouth closed, swallowing the angry words that were going to spill forth. They were interrupted by a long animalistic cry from the basement. Geoff sat up straighter, wiping his face.

“What was that?” He asked and Alex sighed, Geoff’s two-week bender having deleted his memory.

“It’s Ryan remember? I had to lock him in. He’s not happy about it.” Geoff cursed softly, life coming back to him.

“I better do something about that huh?” he asked and got nods in return.

“Please.” Gavin added, wanting Ryan the dork guy back. In dealing with one crewmembers absence, they had let Ryan dissolve back into madness. Now they had to get him back.

 

That took two months. Ryan was deranged, screaming about betrayals and dark shadows. When Geoff finally showed his face, Ryan nearly brained himself trying to get through the bars to kill him. He roared about fair weather friends, Masters abandoning their slaves and Fathers that should have protected instead harmed. Alex was his jailor, Michael and Gavin merely food. He wanted blood and they had to tranq him just to be able to throw him someone for him to kill.

It was a long process of taming the man again, this time Michael and Gavin horrified witnesses to the process. It was hard to imagine the lunatic that they had witnessed when Ryan finally came back to himself. Michael stood in front of Gavin when it came time to let Ryan out again. The door opened, the crew waiting tense and alert in case Ryan snapped, but he came out rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly.

“Hey guys.” He said softly, his clothes stunk of old blood and sweat but Gavin didn’t care. He shoved by Michael, ignoring the warning cries of the gents, throwing himself into Ryan's arms. The killer enfolded him, dipping his head to nuzzle Gavin's neck.

“Rye! We missed you!” Gavin called and Ryan grinned.

“I missed you guys too.” He said, sanity reinstated by the flimsiest of barriers. Seeing that Ryan wasn’t going to harm them, they drew together, welcoming him back. For the first time since Ray left them, they felt hopeful. Ryan had circled the drain but together they brought him back and he was grateful to them.

In this time of grief, the five broken monsters became men once more, leaning on each other to get through. They were family and they would live for each other. They helped each other cope, slowly going back to their old ways, doing what makes them happy but now they had more support.

Michael no longer had to sneak around and Gavin was encouraged to take back up his hobby. Ryan was fed and what’s more, helped to dispose of the bodies, being gifted with a getaway home for himself after a particularly successful heist. Alex was sent to stay in his holiday home and Geoff was given back his blessed bottle.

By the time Jeremy joined, Ray was never spoken of. It hurt too much and when monsters hurt, they lashed out. so, to their minds, he was walled off, always remembered but never thought about until Jeremy was injured. Then it all came roaring back, the helplessness and the fear and the determination to save him.

They will never let Jeremy go. Never.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that's what happened to Ray :) naw i felt so bad but it had to happen sorry guys don't hurt me!  
> But this is why they're all concerned Jermey may choose his brothers over them, and why they're trying so hard not to drive him away as they cling to him. They don't want him to go and i'm not sure they;; let him walk away either....  
> See you next chapter mahaha


	27. Fight night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time passes but the worrys of FakeAH never pass

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok trigger for NONCON/RAPE. im just playing careful here alright?  
> As always read carefully, this is Dark peeps as it says way at the begining lmao.  
> Enjoy!

The weapons drop was the first of many missions, getting back into the swing of things. Jeremy was healing well, doing physical therapy to get back to how he used to be and starting to take hits again. Gavin was back to chatting up possible marks. Alex was looking for a new pet and Michael found himself a new hobby. Along with a new girlfriend. It had been a tough few months so it’s how the whole crew found themselves relaxing at the cage matches.

“Taking bets! Taking bets!” They could hear the bookie yelling from behind them where they were pressed right up to the cage. Lindsay was kissing Michaels bloodied lips through the cross bars as Gavin was jumping around, throwing mock punches.

“Fucking rinse him my boi!” he was shouting until Alex lay a calming hand on the lads shoulder. Jeremy laughed and looked up to Masked Ryan who was standing next to him, folded arms and still. Watching Michael in these fights was hard for the man, wanting to echo every injury on Michaels opponents. Jeremy knew this but he thought it was good practice to bring Ryan along to cheer for their lad.

Geoff was there hooked fingers through the metal, whistling to get Michael to break apart from Lindsay to look at him.

“You got this?” he asked low and Michael nodded, grinning wide.

“Fuck yes.” He said throwing a look of contempt at his opponent who was pacing slightly by the door, ready to be let in the moment bets wrapped up.

“Yeah Geoff, my Michael is going to fucking win! Aren’t you baby?” Lindsay crowed and Michael smiled at her, giving her a cocky wink.

“For you, I’ll make him eat teeth.” He said and she gave a happy nawww then they kissed again. Geoff rolled his eyes and flicked a finger at Jeremy, the shortest lad coming forward obediently.

“Put this on Mogar for the knock out.” Geoff ordered handing Jeremy a wad of cash and Jeremy nodded. He shouldered his way through the crowd, Ryan watching after him but not following. Jeremy had healed well, able to bodily shove his way past the rowdy crowd, not needing Ryan to shadow him any longer. That made the man happy just as much as it made the monster angry.

“Bets closing!” came the announcement and Michael moved back, starting to warm up, bouncing on his feet and testing the length of his arm. He had already been through two bouts tonight, his shirtless state showing off the sheen of sweat and bruises already blossoming. This guy would be coming in fresh.

He was new to this scene but he needed to find another outlet for his self punishment. He was made for these fights, the cage like a church, calm and serenity filling him. That was until the first hit. Then it was rage and pain, roaring to life as he worked everything broken inside him into each attack. He was a crowd favorite, always supplying blood for the audience. He watched as his opponent was let in, savagely baring his teeth at the man.

He wasn’t going down tonight.

Gavin, Lindsay and Jeremy stayed standing, cheering and yelling by the cage, Jeremy thumping his palm against it to make it rattle. Inside Michael ducked and weaved, coming in hard and fast, landing solid hits then dancing away again. Ryan stayed close, unable to handle the three he considered vulnerable to be without his intimidating presence.

That left Alex and Geoff to themselves, Geoff nodding his head at the impromptu bar and the two gents making their way over, hearing the roar of the crowd as it groaned, Michaels voice carrying across to them.

“Get up Bitch! Get up and take what I give you!!”

Geoff grinned and caught Alexs eye, ordering them both a pint each.

“Sounds like Michaels having fun.” He said and another roar went up, Michaels cheer squad loudest of all as blood was spilt. Alex chuckled and took a drink, right there.

“I gotta say, it’s nice to be out, everyone happy, no drama.” He said and Geoff agreed, clinking their glasses together. Hullum had all but disappeared from mind, no threats had approached the crew. Now Jeremy was out of danger, Geoff didn’t hesitate to tell Kovic the true reason for the hospital shoot out, seeing as it was now too late for anyone to take advantage. He did however keep the splitting of Trevor and Matt from his crew to himself.

They were still out there and that didn’t sit right with Geoff.

But there was nothing to do for it until they were found, so he just enjoyed the night with his crew. They headed back to the VIP seats right next to Michaels side of the cage, just in time to see Michael finish his opponent.

A fist came up, slamming into jaw, driving the already beaten and exhausted man into the cage bars. Michael grabbed the back of his neck and shoulder, pulling him back then slamming him forward again then threw him to the ground with the rebound. The guy panted and spat thick blood, rolling about to get up when Michael turned and drove a foot into the guys face. Teeth flew and Michael screamed down at him, arms spread.

“Stay the fuck down! stay the fuck down!” He roared at the unconscious man and the door opened, the ringers rushing in to separate them. Michael held his hands up and backed away, as his opponent was dragged out to the roars of the audience. Lindsay was jumping up and down, her arms around Gavin, both of them cheering.

“Fucking showed him! Got a hankering for getting your ass beat? Jonesenforabruising.Com!” laughed Jeremy, bloodlust in his eyes. Michael leant on his knee’s sucking in some deep breaths, having taken a few hard knocks himself. Geoff got up and approached the cage, Michael stumbling over to him as another challenger was called.

“You ok?” he asked seriously and Michael nodded, wiping blood from his nose, still breathing heavily. Jeremy heard a disbelieving snort by his side and vagabond strode off, the first time he’d willingly left the crew side all night. Jeremy wanted to follow until he saw where Ryan was heading, understanding lighting his features.

Ryan stalked over to where the equipment was and grabbed a first aid kit, a stool and a rag. He turned to the unfortunate keeper of the cage door who gulped.

“Open it.” He ordered and the keeper swung the door wide, letting the huge skulled mercenary through.

“Get us a bucket of water.” Ryan shot over his shoulder, his voice the deep one of vagabond. He came over to Michael and made him sit, Lindsay following Ryan's path to get inside, squatting by Michael. After a rough cleaning, Vagabond looked through the metal bars meshed together to meet Geoff’s eyes. He shook his head and Geoff nodded.

“Tell them Michaels done for the night.” Geoff ordered Gavin, Jeremy having been sent to pick up Geoff’s winnings. Michael objected but Lindsay and Ryan were adamant. When he got up from his short rest, he rocked alarmingly on his feet before he steadied. Lindsay put and arm around his waist, looking like an embrace more than a support.

He walked out like a fucking champion, people wanting to pat his back and roar his name. The crew contracted around him, Vagabond directly in front, glaring a way through the crowd. Lindsay stayed by his side, Gavin and Jeremy walking behind, arms lifted chanting, “Mo-gar! Mo-gar! Mo-gar!” to rile up the crowd.

They exited the building, crowd sticking inside for the next fight, crew heading towards their cars. Gavin and Jeremy were dissecting the fights piece by piece, as they went. Lindsay was praising Michael, trying to keep him off his injured foot, that last kick having gashed it deeply from the broken teeth. They sat him down in the back of the car, not wanting to put him all the way in until it was stitched.

Lindsay did the honors of stitching him up, Gavin leaning against the door, chatting to Michael about his fight and Jeremy going around the car to get in the driver’s seat. The gents were arranged facing Michael, making sure he was ok before they left for their own car, Geoff in the middle. Jeremy popped the handle on the door, eye’s sliding automatically over rooftops. It was the smallest dull glint, only years of being a sniper himself alerting him to it.

“Sniper!” He screamed and everyone automatically ducked, Jeremy pulling his pistol and gave cover fire. Michael tipped back in his seat, Lindsay throwing herself across him, Gavin slamming the door as he rolled to behind the boot. Two bullets barely missed Gavin’s head, imbedding into the paneling of the car, the second shattering glass. Alex had grabbed Geoff’s head and hit the deck with his boss, both backing up against the wall, the sniper unable to get to them due to angle.

Vagabond spun on his heel, his own weapon free, bolting towards where Jeremy was firing at, disappearing into the alley.

“Get out of here!” ordered Geoff to Gavin who nodded and crawled along to the driver’s side. Lindsay was sitting up, a rifle from under the seat in her hands, shooting up where the shots had come from. Jeremy had sprinted by the Boss and his second, following after Ryan, trying to grab the sniper before they disappeared. Alex yanked Geoff along towards their car, the lad’s vehicle pealing off when Gavin managed to get the engine started.

Jeremy’s side ached, but he could push through it. Caleb was going to rip him a new one but he didn’t give a fuck right now, the scar feeling like a bad stitch. He thundered down the alley, common sense helping him dictate how the area would be set out. He made a turn and was rewarded with the sight of Ryan swarming up a ladder and over an edge.

Ryan hit the roof rolling, coming up under cover, bullets hitting the vent he had hidden behind. He heard a voice curse lowly, then silence. He breathed deep and even, letting only a sliver of his dark self out, coating his mind in a fine focus, concentrating on hearing where the enemy was. He shifted slightly in his squat, leaning back to peek out.

Another round of bullets had him pulling his head back to safety. He bared his teeth under his mask, then judged the distance between this vent and another. He rocked on his heels ready to make a break for it when he heard footsteps both on the ladder and from where the sniper was keeping him grounded. He rounded his pistol at the ladder, only instinct stopping him from blowing away that green tipped head, Jeremy's dye almost completely grown out.

The sniper had no such hesitation and lit up the ladder, Jeremy ducking out of sight. Ryan took advantage to shift cover, getting aside the sniper and shooting. The woman cried out as one hit her side then another her throat. Vagabond rushed over, pressing a hand to her neck, cursing that it was a mortal wound having been aiming for her shoulder.

“Who sent you?” he shouted but she just gurgled, her fingers tight on his sleeve, blood running over her lips. Jeremy came towards them slowly, checking to make sure the sniper was alone before he squatted down next to Ryan and his dying opponent.

“Who sent you!” he asked again urgently, the woman’s face fearful as death swarmed close. Ryan tore off his mask, not wanting to waste the offering before him, staring her in the eyes as death took her swiftly. Her grip loosened then fell, her breath bubbling away into nothing. Jeremy watched Ryan take a deep shuddering breath before he sat back, tipping his head back and letting the cool night air caress his bared skin.

As Ryan savored his kill, Jeremy leant forward and searched her thoroughly before coming up with a photo of Gavin, the lad holding hands with some woman, obviously exiting a club together. On the back was a sentence written in clear cursive.

Gavin Buckley fifty thousand dollars.

Jeremy gave a soft curse at that but before he could draw Ryan's attention the gent was atop him, hands grabbing at his sides and mouth demanding his. He was knocked back next to the dead sniper, Ryan growling, his face paint looking demonic in the light as he rocked against Jeremy. Lil’J put his arms up between them, trying to shove him back, twisting his head to free his lips.

“Rye! Cut it out!” he cried out then hissed in pain as Ryan bit him. He found his wrists being held by large hands, Ryan burying his face into Jeremy's neck.

“Smell so good little prince.” He muttered and pressed himself against his lover.

“Ryan no! Get off me!” Jeremy demanded. This was neither the time nor place and one of Ryan's fingers had dug into the new scar, causing Jeremy to be in a type of pain that was not a turn on. He grunted, pulling a hand free and clocking Ryan across the face, the killers eyes narrowing above his at the hit, not appreciating the fight Jeremy was putting up.

“Been too long. Stay still!”

“Not here! Get off me!” Jeremy yelled again, swinging but Ryan threw his head forward, hitting Jeremy’s face with the hardest part of his skull, stunning the lad so he could flip him over. He snagged the waistband of Jeremy’s jeans, trying to yank them out of the way. Then he was sent reeling back, Jeremy having recovered from the stun and kicked out, catching Ryan's hip.

In a move that had his side screaming at him, Jeremy dropped onto his hip, spinning onto his back and leaping to his feet, bringing a knee to Ryan's face. His boyfriend fell back with a curse, then Jeremy threw himself on top, grappling him hard, ignoring the freshly ripped muscles.

“Stop fighting me!” Jeremy yelled into Ryan's face, his arm pressing against Ryan's throat, the other trying to stop Ryan's hands from throwing him off. Ryan snarled, eyes mad as he bucked beneath Jeremy, trying to fling the lad away. Jeremy's only chance was to somehow get through to human Ryan.

“You promised me!” Jeremy cried out and that seemed to sink into the psychopaths mind. He stilled underneath Lil’J panting hard, hands coming up to grab at the arm pressed against his throat. Jeremy noticed the change and stilled himself, glaring down at Ryan.

“You calm?” He asked and Ryan nodded. Very carefully, he sat back, sitting on Ryan's chest and hands still tense to attack. Ryan sucked in a few breaths, fingers massaging his throat, the other placed against Jeremy’s thigh.

“Sorry.” He said gruffly and Jeremy just looked fiercely down at him for a time.

“We’re talking about this later.” He said finally, getting himself up with a pained grunt, grabbing at his side and stumbling away. Ryan felt guilt flare up, intertwined with concern. He got up himself, coming over to where Jeremy leant up against the roof railing, lifting his shirt to inspect his side.

“May I?” Ryan asked hesitantly and Jeremy reluctantly agreed. Ryan bent, grabbing his phone out for light and cursed quietly.

“I’m so fucking sorry. This looks like Caleb should have a prod at you.” He said and Jeremy grunted an assent.

“Just go see if you can find the photo you made me drop. I’m going to call Geoff, make sure everyone else is ok.” He said stiffly, turning away in a clear dismissal of his apologetic boyfriend. Ryan sighed but respected his space, backing up and starting to look over the roof. Luckily it wasn’t windy tonight so the photo hadn’t gone far from the dead sniper.

Ryan grabbed his mask then searched the sniper himself, pulling out any cash she had, spare ammo for her side arm and a key presumably for her rifle case. Her death had been a great top up, the glow obliterating Ryan's control. In the initial high, he realized how long it had been since he had been with Jeremy and how much he wanted him. It hadn’t occurred to his blissed out mind Jeremy might not want to fuck on a roof next to a dead body while their crew was in danger. Nothing had occurred to Ryan but the blinding light and the need to share it with his partner. Now he knew he was in trouble and he was hating himself.

What if this was what drove Jeremy away and too his brothers?

Jeremy looked out over where the cars had been parked, the snipers rifle case near his feet. He would inspect that in a moment, after he spoke to Geoff.

“Lil’J, you guys good?” Geoff answered second ring, engine running and music playing in the background.

“We got the sniper. Unfortunately, she died before we could question her. Unlucky throat shot.”

He paused so Geoff could curse but spoke again before he could be questioned.

“I searched her down. Looks like it was a bounty for Gavin. Fifty big ones. There’s a photo. We’ll bring it home soon.”

“You alright? You sound out of breath.” Geoff's voice was concerned but laced with the unspoken order not to downplay anything. Jeremy gripped the rail tight with his free hand, biting down the angry words that were about to spill out. Instead he tried to keep to the truth as much as possible.

“There was a bit of a scuffle. I might head out by Caleb’s on the way home if there’s no hurry?”

“No, no hurry man. Just make sure your ok. You’ve already used up a lot of sick days.” Geoff joked and Jeremy found it in him to chuckle, Geoff always being able to put him at ease. He stiffened slightly when he felt Ryan at his back, gently curling an arm around his waist, the other framing his arm down to the railing, putting his fingers over Jeremy’s.

“I won’t use anymore if I can help it. Did you want the body?” He asked, his voice a little more tight now but to sore and tired to shrug Ryan off. He couldn’t do another wrestle right now so he let Ryan hold him until he could get off the phone with Geoff.

“Nah. Just take photo’s and leave it there. You guys going to be good for transport?”

“We’ll be fine. I’ll head by Caleb's and vagabond can head home with the info.” It was a clear back off sign to Ryan who ignored it, dipping his head so his masked forehead was against Jeremy's shoulders.

“No, Ryan can take you to Caleb’s. I don’t like you guys splitting up until we know just why Gavin has a bounty and whether it’s just him.”

“Geoff, I don’t think that’s the best idea.” Jeremy said slowly, not wanting to dob Ryan in but not wanting to be around him at the moment. Ryan’s grip tightened then loosened around his waist, the man giving a shudder against him.

“Why the fuck not? You’ve been pasted together since you got out of dam hospital. Fuck buddies foreverest or something.” Geoff said humorlessly, Alex chuckling in the background. Jeremy perked up a little, Geoff’s words reminding him how hard Ryan had been trying lately. So he had a little slip up, it wasn’t like he succeeded or anything. Jeremy could hold his own.

“Yeah, you know you’re right.” He said to Geoff who gave another chuckle.

“Dam right I am. Did you guys have a fight or something?”

“Sort of, but it’ll keep. Stay safe and we’ll see you at home.”

“Straight to the clinic, get checked out then straight home. No detours ok?”

“Aye aye boss.” Jeremy said feeling much better, hanging up and pocketing his phone. He repeated the orders to Ryan who just nodded into his shoulder.

“I am really sorry Jeremy.” He rumbled behind his mask. Jeremy sighed and turned, Ryan backing up a little so they could look at each other’s faces. Well, he could look into Jeremy's at least. Jeremy looked a lot less pissed off now which was good and gave Ryan hopes that maybe he didn’t fuck up too badly.

“Well, you’ve fucked my side, so only fair you do the heavy lifting.” Jeremy commented dryly and the skull mask tipped down lower.

“Again, I’m sorry. It just came over me. We haven’t… I just wanted you to share with me. I should have better control then that.” He added the last part bitterly, angry with himself for such a slip. Made all the worse by the fact he was the one to harm his Jeremy. Now the lad was looking up at him, quizzically as the older man trailed off. He pulled his eyes away, even the fresh kill doing nothing to ease his remorse.

“Come on. This isn’t the place to talk, we got a job to do.” Jeremy said into the silence, Ryan feeling crushed as Jeremy pushed him fully away. Jeremy inspected the weapon, folding it away properly into its case. They would take that with them. Ryan got busy taking photos of the scene so they could perhaps find an identify for it, another lead to track down.

He snatched up the rifle case before Jeremy could, the lad rolling his eyes at him but making no comment. Getting down the ladder sucked for Lil’J but he managed it, his side afire. They made minimum talk as they stole a vehicle. Ryan drove, searching for something to say, something to bridge this gap that had come between them. Jeremy didn’t seem angry anymore but he was in pain and he obviously wasn’t he usual loving cheeky self.

Jeremy went into the clinic alone, finding Caleb relaxing behind a desk, feet up and head tilted back. Jeremy went straight to him and nudged his chair startling the doctor into sitting up, head wrenching around to focus on him.

“Oh what have you done now?” he asked, getting up and shooing Jeremy into his makeshift diagnostic room. It took about half an hour before Jeremy was waved off, side tightly bandaged again, a fresh pack of painkillers in hand and a firm order not to mess about fighting until the muscle was stronger. Thankfully it wasn’t torn like he originally expected but he was warned to tone it down unless he wanted to be back in bed rest.

“Are we going to talk about this?”

Ryan asked when Jeremy got back in, having waited in the car.

“Nope. Not until we’re home.”

Ryan bit back his frustration at that answer, instead letting the fresh kill waft up and take his mind. The haze of it soothed him, reassuring him there was no wrong in the world. Anything he did was right and everything would become good again.

Jeremy heard Ryan give a contented sigh and he knew that the older man had retreated back into himself, giving up on apologizing for now. Which was fine with him because he was thinking hard and didn’t want to talk right now. He wasn’t the only one not talking either.

 

“Who the hell is this woman Gavin?” Geoff confronted his hacker with the photo they delivered once they were home. Gavin was seated on the couch, Alex sitting beside him while Geoff stood. Jeremy sat himself down across the way, Ryan standing behind him, hands on the couch behind Jeremy's shoulders. Lindsay and Michael were nowhere to be seen, Lindsay having bullied Michael to bed, knowing they would be filled in on the details later.

“Just some bird I met at a club Geoff.” He said with a guilty shrug. Geoff threw the photo at him and paced away, running a hand through his hair.

“Obviously not. Why have you got a bounty for fifty thousand dollars?”

“Well I dunno do I? I didn’t set it!” Gavin said defensively, alex putting his arm around his shoulders to keep him settled in his seat. Jeremy's side ached and he had swallowed two pills dry in the car. This was typical Gavin, causing trouble and having no idea what he’s done. He didn’t understand however why Geoff was so upset flinching back at Gavin's words.

“Fuck you Gavvers. You are not to leave crew territory. I want you within sight of someone at all times. We are going to find whoever set this, and then we’re going to send a message. You will remember who this ‘Some bird’ is so we can track her down too.”

“Geoff! Come on seriously? We spend more time in this freakin place then outside of it these days!” Gavin complained, Jeremy startling when Ryan grabbed Jeremy’s shoulder, squeezing lightly. He looked up puzzled but Ryan still had his mask on so he couldn’t see his face. He turned back to Geoff who sighed and rubbed both his hands over his face.

“I’m just- trying to keep you safe. All of us.” He admitted reluctantly, pulling his hands down and looking to Gavin then around the room. Jeremy was the one who spoke, everyone else more somber then he expected.

“This is about me isn’t it? My side?” he asked and they said nothing, the silence telling, “Ok, fine, we can play it that way.”

He stood up, Ryan's hands slipping away. He looked directly at Geoff, his words directed to his boss but for everyone to hear.

“It’s a bounty. We’ve had bounties before. Sure it’s a particularly high one, but we’ll deal with it. We can hit the club in the picture, track down the snipers identity… there’s plenty we can be doing instead of locking down the hatches. I joined this crew because it was the most ballesy heists I had ever heard of. Not because we’re a bunch of fucking cowards. What? One little wound and you all want to hide away? We may as well kill ourselves if we’re not out there doing our jobs.”

“Jeremy… You don’t understand.” Alex said slowly, and Jeremy rounded on him.

“I know that Alex. You have all been weird since I got knifed.”

“Can you blame us?!” Geoff turned on Jeremy, Gavin's bounty momentarily forgotten, “Your little friends are still alive, running about out there. The one’s who gave you that air hole huh? You think we’d let that slide for anyone else? That anyone else gets a free pass like that? As for staying home, whose fault is that huh? You’re the one who couldn’t control your dam high! It was your friends who stabbed you, and we had to give you time to heal without anyone knowing we had a weak link. That’s you Lil’J in case you weren’t keeping up. You and your fucking family problems!”

“Don’t blame me for that. I haven’t asked you to leave off them have I?” he yelled back taking refuge in anger rather than letting the truthful guilt rob him of his voice and Geoff scoffed.

“Yeah I am blaming you Jeremy! You should have told us the moment you remembered. We could have just grabbed them immediately! But no you had to be all fucking noble and white knight that shit!”

Alex made a shushing motion but Geoff was incised and threw a hand out to silence Alex before he could speak.

“No Alex, you shut the fuck up! I’m sick of tip toeing around!” he strode towards Jeremy, Ryan shifting behind the lad, torn between obeying his master and protecting his lad. Geoff got into Jeremy's face, pressing a finger to his chest.

“You look me in the eye right now and tell me if I put out a hit on your butt buddies, you wouldn’t leave tonight to save their ungrateful, unworthy asses.” Jeremy’s lips tightened but he refused to mouth a lie. Geoff gave a hollow grin and nodded.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought. So excuse me Mr high and mighty, I think I know what’s best for my crew alright? If I tell Gavin to stay home then I fucking expect him to stay home. If I tell you to go the fuck to your room, I expect you to do that. You have no fucking clue what you’ve stepped in here.”

“Only because none of you assholes will tell me!” Jeremy said as Geoff turned away. Gavin looked up at Jeremy bringing attention to him.

“It’s not that simple Lil’J. See the thing is-“

“Shut it!” Geoff ordered Gavin who obediently shut his mouth. Geoff crossed his arms and glared at Jeremy.

“That’s information is for crew who have proved their loyalty.” He said heavily, the words flung like a weapon at Lil’J who bristled, tears prickling. His dark self was roaring, his fist tightening and suddenly all he wanted was to kill, let the gold take his mind away like it had Ryan's behind him.

“I am loyal Geoff.” He forced out and Geoff scoffed, waving a hand towards the bedrooms.

“Yeah but too who Lil’J? Figure it out huh? Now get out of my sight, we grownups still need to talk.” For a moment Lil’J struggled to hold back his anger before he made himself move. He wanted to hurt someone, kill something he was so mad. It wasn’t fucking fair of Geoff to make him choose between his crew and his brothers. Ryan watched him go but made no move to follow. He had no one to turn too here.

Ryan did want to follow but he wasn’t thinking clearly right now, his body a tingle from letting go and falling into his kill. So he let Jeremy walk away alone, turning his attention back to Geoff when Alex leant forward.

“What did we say about pushing him?” Alex asked low and Geoff waved a hand, falling to sit in his normal one seater.

“Oh go fuck yourself Al.” Geoff growled, putting his head in his hand. Gavin was holding the photo of himself staring at the woman carefully. Ryan slid off his mask, letting Vagabond go back down into his subconscious and came around to sit as they spoke around him.

“We need to tell him about Ray.” Alex was saying and Geoff was rubbing his forehead.

“We don’t need to tell him shit.” Geoff said quietly then Gavin straightened when Geoff barked his name, “Gavin. How current is the ID Buckley?”

“It’s my current one. Come to think of it, this might be from that bender a couple of weeks ago. After that drop job, I thought I’d meet up with Spoole. Might have picked up the bird then. To be honest that night is a bit of a blur to me.”

“Fuck Gavin…” Alex commented and Gavin raised his arms defensively.

“What do you want from me Alex? I got needs too! You and Geoff have been all over each other. Ryan’s gone all caveman over Jeremy so I can’t muck about with him. Michaels trying out fucking monogamy and if that’s not the biggest load of bull I’ve ever heard I don’t know what is! Is it any wonder I wanted to just go out and have a few bevs and maybe have a quick bang?” Gavin spouted then folded his arms, turning his head away to hide his tears. Alex sighed and pulled Gavin into his side, kissing his forehead as the brit humphed. Geoff also looked a little stunned then his face hardened and he turned to Ryan.

“Find out who wants Gavin dead and why. You have all our resources. Get it done.” Ryan nodded and got up, pausing when Geoff spoke again, “I heard you and Jeremy had a fight?”

“Yes we did.” He said tightly, not wanting to talk about it but Geoff was adamant.

“Well get your shit in order. I want you two to track this bounty setter down together. I’m not letting this one slip no matter who it ends up being.” Ryan agreed, wondering if now was the time to tell Geoff he hadn’t ever stopped searching for Trevor and Matt. He didn’t have a chance too as Geoff got up and pulled Gavin out of his seat, the lad giving a surprised squawk.

“Come on, your sleeping with me tonight you overgrown idiot. If you wanted attention all you had to do was ask.” Geoff said as he propelled Gavin before him. Alex gave a chuckle as they left, motioning Ryan to stay back. Once they heard the door close, Alex became serious.

“This isn’t the way I expected the night to go.” He commented and Ryan shrugged.

“the best laid plans of mice and men… tend to get a bit screwy when there’s a sniper attempt on one of your own.”Ryan told him and Alex leant forward, speaking softer.

“How close is Jeremy to bolting?” he asked with concern.

“At the fights, I’d say none. After this rodeo, I’m not sure. I couldn’t even tell you where I’m sleeping tonight.” He confided as Alex tilted his head at him.

“Fight that bad huh?” he inquired softly, looking confused when Ryan pressed a hand to his face taking a deep breath as if to steal himself.

“I may have, possibly, kinda tried to rape him.” He said in a rush and Alex sucked in a shocked breath.

“Oh rye…” He breathed in disappointment and then it all came out of the monster turned man.

“I didn’t set out too! Just the rush hit and it was an unplanned kill and it’s been so long! We haven’t been close since he got hurt, I didn’t trust myself but then the gold got me and I just wanted him so bad. I-“ he stuttered off and let out a low groan, shaking his head, “I wasn’t thinking. I just wanted him to be mine again.”

“What the hell does that mean? I thought you two had worked this out? Your each other’s or whatever.”

“Yeah I know, but I won’t talk to me about his brothers. I’m sure he could help us find them, he’s the one who knows them best. But he won’t. I can’t help feeling I’m going to lose him. It makes me want to lock him up in Edgar’s room forever but if I did that then he wouldn’t be my prince anymore.”

Ryan was confused when Alex shifted seats and wiped at Ryan’s face. Alex showed him the offending drops and Ryan touched his face to feel that he was crying. He narrowed his eyes at Alex perplexed, silently asking for an answer.

“Look, I don’t have any easy answers rye. God knows my relationship is always fucked up. But no matter how angry she gets at me, in the end, she loves me back. She always comes back to me. So maybe you should let him come to you for once? Stop trying to force him to be what you need him to be and instead try being there for him.”

“I was there for him! I stayed with him the whole time!” Ryan pointed out as Alex shook his head.

“No, you did that for you. You couldn’t stand being without him. You kept Trevor and Matt away when Jeremy needed to talk with them-“

“Which was a good thing because they’re the assholes who-“

“I know what they did! The point is though, you didn’t keep them out because you knew that. You kept them away because it suited you. Jeremy is so unselfish, always looking out for others. Maybe you should try looking after him huh? For him, not for you. People want to know their appreciated.” Alex raised an eyebrow as Ryan thought over his words. Alex’s giant hand patted him on the shoulder and he left for bed himself, leaving Ryan to rethink his actions.

 

After his shower, Ryan hesitantly poked his head into his shared room, towel wrapped tightly around his waist. Jeremy was laying back under the sheets, one hand thrown across his face, hiding his eyes. Ryan tiptoed in, the only light coming from the lamp next to his lad. He turned for the dresser, meaning to grab his pajama pants and maybe sleep on the couch when Jeremy spoke up.

“You promised me that your mine right?” He said, Ryan looking over his shoulder to see the younger man was unmoving.

“Yes I did. And I meant it.” He replied to him causing Jeremy to pat the bed next to him. Ryan hesitated then came over, slipping the towel away as he got in. He laid back into his pillows unsure if he should pull Jeremy to him like he normally did.

His dark self screamed at him to possess his apprentice but the nights events had sobered him, Alexs outsider perspective giving him things to think about. This was so hard for him, trying to have a human relationship when he wasn’t really human himself. Nor really was his partner as much as Lil’J liked to pretend otherwise.

“You fucked up.” Jeremy commented, turning onto his good side, his arm moving from covering his eyes to instead propping his head up. His turn had brought him close to Ryan's side, not touching but he could feel the heat between them. Ryan nodded eye’s serious and they traced the mark he had head butted into Jeremy's forehead just as the Sniper lifted a hand and traced the bruising across Ryan's collar bone.

“How do you think this ends?” He asked softly and Ryan swallowed the fear that made his skin itch and his dark self snarl for the attack.

“Ah, hopefully not tonight?” he tried joking and he was rewarded with a flash of Jeremy's smile, teeth winking momentarily.

“No, seriously Ryan. It’s not ending tonight. But Geoff freaking out over me, over Gavin potentially being killed… How else does he expect this to end? There’s no happily ever after for people like us is there?”

“You know why I’m here.” Ryan said, taking in the seriousness on Jeremy's face and taking a chance, grabbing his hand and pulling it over his heart, “I’m here because there’s nowhere else for me. I’m not human. I haven’t been in years. So no, I don’t see a white picket fence for me. I saw the end of a shotgun in my future.” Jeremy looked to him questioningly and god or devil or whoever be listening help him because Ryan just couldn’t deny his prince anything.

“I get where Geoff’s coming from now though. I don’t see a picket fence but I do see a nice little house in the mountains. Full of Diet coke and full of games. There can be a monster truck parked side by side with a black and green bike. Somewhere where a Xbox and a PC can live side by side. Maybe take a few road trips across country, see the lights of the world.” Ryan trailed off, having unwittingly revealed to himself let alone Jeremy what he wanted. It was as surprising to him as it was the Lad. Jeremy smiled, eyes crinkling.

“You want that?” he asked and Ryan nodded, his voice wrapped up in the gold of a kill, the low dulcet tone Jeremy loved to hear.

“I do. I really do. I really hope I haven’t fucked this tonight. I’m trying, I swear I am Jeremy. It’s just so hard to remember you need a choice too.” Jeremy sighed and let Ryan off the hook, scooting closer and pressing his lips to the Gents neck, ghosting over the shadow of a bite he had given Ryan.

“Well, just don’t let it happen again huh? Besides, you did end up stopping. You know eventually.” He chuckled inviting Ryan to chuckle with him. He was almost smug, Jeremy’s forgiveness washing over him, allowing him to be cradled in his high once more. His grin widened and he pressed a return kiss into the lads skin.

“Well, since we’re talking choices now. Is this a better time?” he muttered before giving a quick lick Jeremy gave a sigh then nodded. Ryan pulled back to search his face as he brushed Jeremy's lips with his own.

“Never mind.” He said and pulled him in to his spot, protected by the curve of Ryan's arm. Jeremy shifted back a bit and Ryan let him go, his young boyfriend looking up at him.

“What do you mean, ‘Never mind’?”

“It means don’t worry about it. Your sides probably still aching and I’m not your favorite person right now even if you do forgive me.”

“Well you’re a step up from Geoff, I’ll tell you that much.” Jeremy murmured, touched that Ryan was giving him time and space. Ryan gently tugged him back into place, and tipped his head so he was talking into Jeremy's ear.

“Don’t be so rough on Geoff. He’s got a lot on his plate. He knows your loyal, he just can’t stand that someone who hurt you is getting away with it.” His own arms tightened at the thought and his voice got hard. He had to take a moment to calm himself, Jeremy giving him that time before he spoke.

“They were my brothers Ryan. For years. You can’t even understand what we’ve been through. No matter how angry I am at them, I can’t just throw them to, well, you.”

“You cannot protect them forever. They’re going to come back you know.”

Jeremy scoffed and shook his head.

“No. So long as I’m with you guys, they won’t come within a thousand miles.”

Ryan thought differently but he didn’t want to argue tonight. Somehow despite his earlier behavior, Jeremy had forgiven him again. Alex was right, the boy was selfless. Ryan had no compunctions using that to his advantage. So he just pulled Jeremy close, leaning over and turning off the lamp, settling in to sleep.

Tomorrow was going to be a long day running around chasing leads.

 

Dollface grinned her glasses reflecting the light from the screen. She brought up the photo, one taken only two nights ago as Mogar got into his car. With a little bit of elbow grease and knowhow she managed to make it appear that Funhaus’s main middle man for their forgery operation was sitting in the front seat.

She sent that off too Kovic as soon as it was perfected along with the emailed note, ‘A friendly tip. Be in touch.’. Once that was done she then brought up another picture, this one untouched. It was of six men standing around with weapons, a pile of coyote bodies around them. It was from an article from sandy shores, reporting on the influx of coyotes and the lengths the locals went to keep them away from the town.

It took a lot to manage to procure Vagabonds email address but she had, sending it off immediately. This time the note read, ‘Look by the obvious. Will not be in touch. Hope this stirs goodwill.’. Once her little job was done, she fried the computer and straightened. The body of the Funhaus middle man was directly behind her and she had to step careful to keep the blood from her shoes.

“I’ll give you something to be bothered about all right.” She murmured to herself as she left, smiling savagely.

elf as she left, smiling savagely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So some time has passed as warned and spoiler but the matt and trevor arc will be coming to a close soon. I just hope you like the way it ends up going (much nervousness here)  
> Next chapter should be up soonish so keep checking back!  
> thank you for commenting and kudosing i love you guys supoort it's awesome which is why i'm so dam nervous rounding out my first arc lol and getting to the next stuff!  
> As allways i hoped you enjoyed and see you soon!


	28. the choice (part one)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Surviving would be one hell of a miricle

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh i'm so sad. This arc is ending and i'm so in love with writing this story i don't want to stop... But i cant drag it out forever so here we go-  
> Thank you to everyone who kudosed and especially my commentors, i love talking with you guys it's the best!  
> I broke the chapter into two just because it's so long, the next part should be out shortly, hopefully, i don't want to give you too long to wonder lol  
> enjoy guys!

Ryan woke first, only needing a bare minimum amount of sleep after his kill last night. He was wrapped around Jeremy, his torso hiding the younger man from sight, almost completely atop him. Jeremy was out deep, mouth wide and a line of drool down his chin. His arms were spread and the bandaging was rough against the soft skin of Ryan's stomach. Luckily he was pooled over Jeremy on the non injured side.

The gent shifted back, Lil’J giving a sleepy moan then rolling over onto his stomach, wincing and waking slightly when it pulled at his bruised scaring. Ryan rubbed his hand over Jeremy’s shoulder blades, giving the back of his neck a quick squeeze to lure his lad back to sleep. It worked and he heard Jeremy’s breathing deepen again.

He sat up and cracked his own neck, rubbing at the sore muscles and letting the glow wash over him. All in all he was pretty satisfied with his life this morning and when he grabbed the laptop from beside his bed, it got better. The worry over someone hacking his email was shoved aside by the thrill when he inspected the photo he had been sent. An angry frown morphed into delighted if slightly deranged smile and he flicked his eye’s to Jeremy then back to his laptop.

Look beyond the obvious, the accompanying note said and there, in the window of the bar the men were in front of was someone Ryan would recognise no matter how they tried to alter their features. He may have shaved his head but it wasn’t enough to stop Ryan from recognising prey. It was the thief Axial Matt.

They were in Sandy shores.

Perfect.

Now He had a choice before him. Who too tell? Jeremy or Geoff?

To buy himself time, he shut his laptop, getting up to get dressed and bring it too Gavin. He jumped into sweat pants, to lazy too get fully dressed and headed out of the room, leaving Jeremy to sleep in.

No one else was up so he took it upon himself to cook breakfast for everyone. After the sniper attempt of last night, they would need it. He also made sure to make a protein shake for Michael, the lad going to need the boost after the fights last night. He threw that in the fridge along with some painkillers and antibiotics next to it for the warrior, Ryan a little worried about infection developing in Michael’s foot. Alex was up next, his face sleep rumpled and his glasses slightly tilted as he shuffled up.

“Morning.” He said softly, leaning past where Ryan was prepping omelettes stuffed with mushrooms and tomato to the fridge. He grabbed out the juice and poured himself a glass, drinking deeply and giving a contented smack of the lips.

“So, you didn’t come back out last night.” He commented and Ryan chuckled.

“Well your right, that boy is way too forgiving. I don’t mind that though. Makes my life easier.” He said happily, dicing up bacon now as Alex stood beside him and started to crack eggs into a bowl.

“I hope you’re not taking advantage of him.” He warned and Ryan smiled at him, raising a brow.

“Oh I’m definitely taking every advantage. He’s a tough one my Lil’J, so I got to take whatever openings he gives me.” He smirked and Alex chuckled at the confidence and care in Ryan's tone.

“God, you’re in a good mood.” He observed and Ryan shrugged, eyes flicking to the laptop he had left on the very edge of the counter. He looked into the hall to make sure no one else was stirring and then put down the knife, leaning towards Alex like a co-conspirator.

“Just between you and me Al?” he asked and Alex nodded, putting down bowl and whisk so he could pay attention.

“I found them.” Ryan said gleefully and Alex frowned, confused.

“What? The Setter? Already? Dude it’s like not even nine yet.”

“No, no.” Ryan shook his head empathically, “O, my offense is rank, it smells to heaven, Alex. I have them at last, those back stabbing bastards, my friend. I know where they slumber.”

Madness slipped into his voice and his eyes shone until Alex could almost see the killers golden haze blazing forth.

“Matt and Trevor?” He breathed and Ryan nodded, smiling widely, showing all his teeth.

“The very same.” He confirmed and Alex now glanced towards the hall himself, coming closer.

“How? When?”

“This morning. I got an email for an anonymous contact. When he’s up I’m going to have Gavin track it, but look.” He wiped his hands on a dishcloth and grabbed his laptop, opening up the attached picture. Alex searched it until Ryan pointed out the figure in the back. Alex squinted and looked up to Ryan.

“Are you sure?” he asked and Ryan nodded, still smiling.

“Trust me. That’s our dearest little thief, the one who tried to steal away my prince, then failing that, tried to steal his life.” He snapped shut the computer and his expression altered from a smile to more of a grimace.

“I’ll have blood Alex.” he said lowly and his fellow crew member, placed a hand on his shoulder.

“Ok bud, but first, maybe breakfast?” Those words sunk in and suddenly Ryan was Ryan again, smile back to normal and taking up the knife. They worked companionably, discussing now the plan of attack for the day. Ryan asked Alex to give him a little time to decide whether Jeremy would be told about finding his brothers. He understood by telling Alex it was a given Geoff would soon know.

Alex agreed then they moved on to how to treat Michael who would defiantly resent anyone worrying over his injuries especially ones so proudly earned. Then it was making a plan for the crew today, a few chores needed to be done. As they spoke, their conversation faltered as they heard that Geoff and Gavin were awake and active. They rolled eyes at each other and started the prepped food to cooking, knowing soon the boss and hacker would come out in much need of energy and that the others still sleeping were probably be woken by the noise.

Once upon a time, they hadn’t lived all under one roof. After they left the memory ridden house in the hills, they had separated into different apartments and houses. It hadn’t been a great time for any of them and they realised that the main crew needed to stick together in order to keep their semblance of sanity. Thus noisy mornings and group breakfasts were a thing they were used too.

Sure enough, Jeremy came out, dressed in his cargo’s and an unbuttoned shirt. He rubbed his eyes sleepily and sat on the stool in front of the kitchen, watching the two gents dance around each other. Alex slid him a juice and another dose of painkillers. Jeremy took it, giving a grateful smile and sniffed deep.

“Smells good.” He said with a sigh, admiring the scars that shone across Ryan’s back as he worked. Alex pulled out some plates and cutlery as Ryan replied to his lad.

“Can’t beat an old fashion omelette Lil’J.” He said, turning around with the pan and gently lifting one onto a plate that Alex gave to Jeremy then another plate Alex kept for himself. Ryan set too making another lot as the others ate.

“So, I was thinking, that rifle was pretty personalised. Maybe we could visit Riggz. He should be able to tell us something.”

Alex swallowed the food he had, glancing up as Michaels door opened but speaking to Jeremy.

“I think Geoff would want to keep this to just us crew right now. He didn’t appreciate Kovic questioning him about the hospital evac.” Jeremy nodded as Michael sat down next to him, bumping his shoulder with his own.

“Morning ache buddy.” He said and Jeremy rolled his eyes.

“Yeah be careful, these guys pass out drugs like candy.” He joked back and on cue, Alex had set the tablets and shake in front of Michael as Ryan served him breakfast. Michael grabbed all the tablets, swallowing them in a mouthful, washing it down then winking at Jeremy.

“I always take candy from strangers. It’s the best candy you can find.” The kitchen was starting to fill up with soft chattering and stupid little jokes as Gavin emerged, then Geoff behind him looking smug and satisfied. Lindsay wasn’t to far behind, hair still wrapped up in a towel and she threw a apple from the fruit bowl at Gavin who mocked her for it. He laughed as he ducked.

“Seriously, is it in the DNA of girls to be able to do that?” he was mocking and Lindsay shut him down with a grin.

“Is it in your DNA to shout the name of whoever is bending you over?” and Geoff sprayed coffee, laughing and choking as Gavin flushed red and rounded on him.

“Shut up that’s your fault!” he cried as everyone laughed, with the exception of Ryan, everyone having been with Gavin at some point and the brit was renowned for being loud no matter whether he was top or bottom.

“Nah, Gavin just can’t keep his mouth shut linds, that’s all.” Alex said and handed Geoff a fresh coffee. Gavin spluttered, more a show of embarrassment but funny all the same. Soon though as plates cleared and they all drifted towards the table, the mood started to turn. By the time they had taken their places, Lindsay stealing Gavin's regular seat and Gavin Alex’s so the second stood behind the boss, they were all ready to listen up. Ryan ran the meeting, seeing as Geoff had charged him with finding the setter.

Michael was a little blue around the face but he was fit to work so he and Alex were going to the club in the picture to see what they could dig up. Ryan was to investigate the bounty, visiting his contacts, see what they can tell him. Meanwhile, Jeremy was heading to the morgue to see whether the sniper had been identified. The two will meet up later to quickly take care of a different job, scaring the sniff out of a group of hooligans messing about around a Fake protected liquor store.

Geoff clapped his hands together happily when Ryan pointed to him in preparation to ask him for his help. He may enjoy being the boss but sometimes it was good to get your hands a little dirty.

“Geoff, If it’s cool, I’d like you too-“

“oh no, Geoff’s mine today if that’s ok? I’ll trade you Larry if you need some muscle.” Lindsay piped up, pulling the towel off and freeing her hair. Ryan shrugged as Geoff rounded on her.

“Come on, I know Gavin might have made you jealous if Michaels not giving enough, but I’m busy sweetheart.” He said and she rolled her eyes as Michael stiffened beside her and lifted his hands.

“Hey! I know how to satisfy. Fuck you man.” He said with a laugh and Geoff winked suggestively. Lindsay brought their focus back to her.

“Michaels amazing dick aside; Geoff you promised me you’d go over the last choice picks today.” She reminded him and he sighed, gesturing at the British hacker.

“Gavin's safety takes priority. Sorry, reschedule.” Lindsay slammed a fist on the table then pointed fiercely at her boss.

“No! That’s the fourth time! Come on, Gavin's safe here, everyone knows their shit,” she looked to Ryan who stayed steady under her burning gaze, admiring the flicker the light in her eyes, “Surely you don’t need him specifically?” she asked and he shook his head.

“No, but I do need to speak to you Geoff, before your off today.” He looked to Geoff who had slumped in disappointment.

“I don’t wanna.” He whined, voice cracking as his crew chuckled. It was settled however, Ryan bucking along Geoff’s job of revisiting the scene last night too Michael and Alex. It worked out better as now he didn’t have to rush his own contacts so he could accompany Geoff himself. Gavin was left out but that was expected, the safest place to be when there was a bounty on your head was the crew quarters.

The meeting broke up, everyone moving away to chat together or prepare for their day. Ryan got up and caught Geoff's eye as the boss was speaking softly to a sulky Gavin. Shortly after, Gavin got up to go bug Michael and Lindsay in the muscleman’s room. Alex and Jeremy were doing the dishes and Ryan made sure the clanking was loud enough to cover when he whispered to Geoff his anonymous tip.

Seeing Jeremy’s bandaging when the lad had sat down at the bench had decided Ryan towards the route of no mercy. Besides, if Jeremy could forgive a near rape attempt then surely he’d forgive the tiny murders of men who were no longer apart of his life. Geoff’s eyes widened then narrowed as Ryan spoke, his first concern always for the security of his crew.

“Who sent it?”

“I don’t know. Not many people have my email. I planned to question my contacts today, see if anyone had been loose lipped with my address.”

“Hmm, I don’t like it. It’s too convenient.”

“Convenient or not, I already triple checked. The article is legit and so is the photo. Matt was in sandy shores Monday past.” Ryan stared at Geoff steadily, awaiting a decision. He wanted blood but if Geoff ordered, he could hold off. For a time at least. Thankfully, Geoff was just as angry if not as lustful for blood that Ryan was.

“Alright, I don’t like the anonymous part, it feels like a set up. Then again, this is the first lead we’ve had here, I don’t want them getting away. Leave it to me, just focus on clearing that bounty today and I’ll have a plan by this afternoon.”

Ryan nodded, happy at the determined tone of his boss.

It was pretty standard from there, Ryan getting dressed, Jeremy jamming his Stetson down around his ears and giving him a passing kiss, nipping at his lip before he left, leaving him by the mirror where he was applying face paint. He felt a brief flush of guilt but banished it with the idea of having the people responsible for Jeremy’s pain under his knife.

Geoff headed out with Lindsay, Michael and Alex leaving at the same time. Ryan gave Gavin his laptop, telling the lad about the email and swearing him to secrecy. Alex had asked if he could fill Michael in and Ryan had agreed. It should be a crew effort. The only one who didn’t know was Jeremy himself. Ryan just didn’t want to press him into choosing just yet. Not until Ryan had taken care of the competition. Then Jeremy’s choice would be easy, between the loving and charming king and the dead and broken brothers.

Ryan knew who he’d choose.

 

Jeremy was happy when he jumped in the car with Ryan. He called his mechanic to pick up his own vehicle, to take back to the garage. He finished off the call as he buckled in then pulled the paperwork from his jacket, tossing it at Vagabond who picked it up curiously.

Apparently the sniper had been a fairly newcomer to Los Santos, building rep slowly. Just another anonymous player in this great game they called life. No one to be bothered by. Coupled with this ID was the report Ryan contact and the information Alex and Michael had dug up, forming a pretty clear picture.

That golden tongued idiot had banged the club owners wife. It was a simple matter now to reverse the bounty. Just had to pay a visit to the club tonight and politely settle this man to mask. But first they had a job to do at the liquor store they frequented.

“So how do you want to play this?” Jeremy asked happily as Ryan drove them towards their territory. Ryan pointed at his mask tsking quietly behind it.

“How do you think?” He asked sarcastically and Jeremy chuckled.

“Ryan the intimidation guy.” He muttered amused as Ryan ignored all road rules, getting them within a block before parking. This being Fake AH territory, they didn’t take kindly to people trading here. Not to mention that sometimes they got high off their own product and caused a disturbance in the liquor store the Fakes had claimed within their protective sphere.

Before they got out, Jeremy screwed on the silencers to his shoulder holstered pistols.

“Seriously though, Geoff said dealers choice, so we aiming to scare or to kill here?” Ryan shrugged, his eyes almost glowing in the deep sockets lined with black as he looked to Jeremy.

“Depends if they’ve heard of us or not.” Jeremy scoffed at that, tugging his jacket straight over his weapons and grabbing his hat. He grinned up at Ryan.

“Fifty bucks says they wet themselves at the sight of you.”

“Please Lil’J. I bet your ass that they’ll be a smell around them.”

“Oh you’re on.” Jeremy said with a wink and got out. He walked into the maze of alleys connecting the buildings while Ryan waited for a count before following.

As he moved closer to where these guys had supposedly set up shop, he enjoyed the fact he didn’t have to act any part today. Today he was every inch apart of the Fakes, Monster truck running some mouthy kids off his territory. With one of the most interesting and fun partners he has ever worked with.

There were two of them at the moment, both leaning side by side against the wall, one smoking as they chatted quietly. He came up to them, making sure to scuff his feet, giving them time to realise he was approaching. As he came closer he tipped his chin up in greeting.

“Hey, you guys got the time?” he asked and they sneered at him.

“Move along Shorty.” Jeremy sniffed and shook his head.

“Oh, like I haven’t heard that one before.” He said dryly, shifting by as if to walk past. Once he was framed in the other end of the alley, effectively the only exit, he turned on his heel.

“Oh, you know... since your being so smart and all with the names, maybe you can call him,” he nodded his head to the end of the alley he came from, drawing their eyes to a sight that made fear squeeze at their hearts, “Baldy.”

Vagabond stood, his jacket open, one hand tucked into a pocket, the other with a machete hanging clearly from his grip. He said nothing, the dealers backing up into the waiting Monster truck. He had his guns out, pressing the barrels into spines, walking them forward towards the Masked monster.

“I think we need to have a little chat guys. Oh, and I think I prefer being addressed as Monster truck thanks. I do dare you to call Vagabond here Baldy though. That would make my day, you have no idea.”

Jeremy grinned as between the two dealers, both Jeremy and Ryan won their prospective bets.

They left very shortly after, sure the message would be spread to the whole group. If they heard anyone dealing around here again, or messing up the Fakes store, they would be back.

“and Vagabond here really doesn’t like being called out during his private time guys. So make sure you and your friends stay gone huh?” Jeremy sent them off, the two stumbling as they ran away. Vagabond moved up to stand behind him, leaning his head forward.

“Looks like I won my bet.” He rumbled and Jeremy grinned, cocking his head and folding his arms.

“I’d say everyone won today.” He said back and Ryan chuckled heading back to the car as Jeremy went to the store to inform the owner they had dealt with the problem. While he did that, Ryan called Geoff and reported on Gavin's bounty.

“Hold up. I don’t want you guys going to the club yet.” Geoff said to Ryan's plan to head over to the club and have a chat with the owner, “I got a better idea.”

Ryan listened in and grinned wide behind his mask. Alex, Gavin and Jeremy could go take care of the bounty tonight and hopefully Jeremy will be so wrapped up in his job, he won’t worry about what the other three were doing. He hung up and swung around the block to pick up Jeremy, who jumped in and grinned at him.

“We off to the club?” he asked and Ryan shook his head, taking his mask off and placing it beside him.

“Nope. Geoff needs me and Michael. So you, Alex and Gavin are going to go later tonight.”

“We can knock this out right now though.” Jeremy said confused and Ryan shrugged.

“Geoff wants to send a message, that’ll be better when the place is crowded.”

“Well why wouldn’t he send you and Michael with me? This is a pure message job then it’ll make more sense that the heavy hitters do it.” Ryan shrugged as Jeremy pointed out the inconstancy.

“He needs us with him. Gavin wants to confront the guy and Alex will do the actual deed. Your just there for back up.” Jeremy narrowed his eyes starting to get suspicious. He didn’t know what was up only that something was. He searched Ryan's profile until the gent flicked a look at him and frowned himself.

“What?”

“Don’t what me rye. What have you guy got to do?”

“None of your business.” Ryan shot out quickly and Jeremy crossed his arms.

“Ok, now I’m sure something’s up.” He said confidently and Ryan reached out, settling his hand in its spot on the nape of Jeremy’s neck.

“Can you just trust me please?” he asked softly, pausing at a light and looking over to his Lad. Jeremy looked at him for a long time until they heard a horn honking behind them, having missed the light change. Ryan ignored it, watching Jeremy.

“Are you in danger?” he finally asked and Ryan grinned, unable to stop the amusement on his face.

“Please. At no point will I, or Geoff or Michael for that matter, be in danger.” He told Jeremy confidently. Before either could speak again, someone knocked on the window angrily. Ryan shifted so he was facing the window, hitting the button to roll it down revealing a red angry face.

“What the fuck man! Lights fucking green! You can’t just park in the middle of the fucking road fuckface!” the guy screamed at him, putting his hand on the window sill so the glass couldn’t go back up.

“You done? We’re trying to have a conversation here.” Ryan said mildly and the guy grabbed his collar, Ryan’s eyes narrowing at the grip.

“No I’m not done you Painted face freak! Get the fuck out of the car!”

“Yeah, you’re done.” Jeremy said and sunk a bullet through the eye socket, spraying Ryan with blood and the body slumping half in the car. Ryan shoved him out then calmly drove away, the window coming back up.

“You’re paying for dry cleaning.” He said and Jeremy put his silenced pistol back.

“Maybe I don’t like people touching you either.” He admitted and Ryan grinned knowing whatever happened, Jeremy would forgive him. His theory was backed up when Jeremy reluctantly spoke.

“I’m going to do this job, and when we see each other later tonight, you’re going to tell me what the big secret is.”

“Seems fair to me.” he said and made an unexpected turn. Jeremy looked around, noticing they weren’t on their way to the main safe house anymore.

“Were we going?”

“Milton safe house. Gavin and Geoff are home and I want to cash in on my winnings without an audience.” Jeremy shook his head and scoffed.

“Your incorrigible, you know that?” he laughed and Ryan winked at him, his handsome face highlighted by the red and black.

“I promise, I’ll try to be gentle.” He said and Jeremy placed a hand on his thigh, squeezing painfully.

“Don’t try too hard.” He said with a matching grin.

 

Trevor stretched his long arms over his head feeling his shoulders and back pop. He let out a sigh then pushed back from the desk. It was six o’clock and despite being a bikie run forgery business, surprisingly he worked regular hours now. He had grown out his hair into a little pony tail, dusting the edges every day to appear older and also grew a small beard.

He got up and reported to his boss he was off. The woman had her feet up on her desk, flicking through a magazine, not even bothering to look up.

“Righto max, see you tomorrow.” She said and he left past the other stations all in various states of pack up. It was only a small operation which suited Trevor fine. It was enough protection to live out here without being so big as to attract attention. Beside’s with his skill set what else is he to do?

He scoffed to himself at the thought, matt having found the answer. Matt had actually found an above board job, bartending at the local dive most nights. It worked out that Trevor worked all day and came home to an empty trailer, Matt having left for his shift. They loved each other but right now, everything was just so grating. It was nice to have space.

It gave Trevor time to take risks.

He jumped in his rancher and turned the key a few times to get the engine to kick over. Once it was rumbling away he drove home only to pick himself up something to eat and his binoculars. He had kept them in the car originally but after a few close calls with Matt, decided to hide them in the scruff by their trailer. Armed with a dinner of dry noodles and a bottle of water, he headed over to his lookout, parking two streets away and walking over to the half collapsed building.

Using the broken wall like a ladder, he swarmed up onto the stronger part of the roof and laid down on his belly. He lifted the binoculars from around his neck and gave a contented sigh as he peered through a open living room window across the street. The dad was home, his son sitting by his side, trying to look old enough to earn the beer his father had given him. The little sister was laying on the floor in front of the TV her legs in the air and her chin in her hands. Mum was nowhere to be seen so Trevor assumed she was making dinner.

He had been watching this particular family since he found them a few weeks ago. It wasn’t the same as when he could bug the place, listen in, learn everything so easily. But it did the job, relaxing him like nothing else to know even out here in the middle of bum-fuck nowhere, there was such things as a family.

The parents did their best, living here because it was the best they could afford. The mother home schooled both children as the father worked hard for every scrap of food they got. Trevor also knew that sometimes the father dealt lightly on the side, providing materials from his industrial job to the Lost MC for their explosives or cook houses.

Tonight when they were all asleep, Trevor was going to go in and sit on that couch. Maybe crack a beer and leave it out when he was done. Just to be able to sit in a room where a family had sat happily watching tv together. For an hour or two he’ll pretend it was his family. That Matt was asleep down the hall and maybe Jeremy would walk in the door at any moment, eyes bright and ready to tell Trevor of his latest adventure.

But it wasn’t to be that night, instead of going to bed with his wife, after the kids had gone to their room, they had a blue. Trevor knew enough to know it was about the fathers trading with the Lost MC and groaned when the wife sentenced her husband to the couch. Foiled, he shimmied off the roof as lights went out across the road. There was only really one place to go when he felt the depression start to build.

Matt fingers itched all the time. He knew better then to steal from the idiots here however or the till. If he did, it would be a small search. Small towns sucked for him because everyone knew everyone else and strangers were always suspected. His palms were developing little scars from how many times he had dug his nails into them.

He had shaved his head complete swapping glasses frames and had lost weight, that last part from stress not to disguise himself. He hated this, serving drinks to assholes, hearing their racist and homophobic comments. Rednecks ruled out here and they put up with it to stay hidden.

Who knew that working for a soulless gang was so liberating? At least there, they didn’t care if your gay, straight, black, white or fucking fluoro pink. They’ll kill you all the same. Here, people did it for fun or out of ignorance. Matt had to serve them the alcohol to go with it.

He bit back a groan when he saw Trevor enter. That was never good. Trevor was fluctuating between his two selves, tonight obviously he was his depressed one. The one who drank until he passed out then woke up throwing up all over their bed. Matt was tired of it.

He was tired of it all.

“Max, please. No. Go home.” He said when Trevor sat down in front of him. Trevor glared at him and pulled out a note.

“Just give me a shot will you?” He asked and matt shook his head, leaning on the bench and bringing his head close.

“No, I’m not serving you. Get out.” he said firmly and Trevor snorted.

“For fucks sake matt-“

“Marvin! My names Marvin asshole fucking remember that?”

“Whatever just give me a beer then, fuck.” Matt grumbled but walked away, getting him his glass. At least when he was drunk, Trevor couldn’t string a sentence together. They had fallen apart since leaving Los Santos. Perhaps Trevor blamed him just as much as he blamed Trevor.

Whatever the cause, Matt all but threw the beer at his asshole housemate and stormed away to serve a different customer. Luckily Trevor had come on the tail end of his shift so was only four beers in and wobbling rather than blind drunk when it came time for Matt to leave. He roughly manhandled Trevor out and towards the car. Normally matt walked, they could only afford one car and the bar was only a ten minute stroll from the trailer.

He tucked Trevor into the car, neither saying a word. Or at least matt was silent, Trevor mumbling something that was so slurred Matt didn’t understand it. Probably a good thing as it wasn’t in a nice tone. Once home, he pulled Trevor out, helping him up into the trailer, letting him fall into the tiny table then onto a seat.

Trevor slumped so his head was pooled in his arms and mumbled something fiercely.

“What was that?” Matt asked, catching enough to know he probably didn’t want to hear it again but having to be sure.

“I hate you!” Trevor turned his head and spat. Matt leaning back against the fridge, bowing his head as Trevor lanced the poison that had been building inside.

“I hate you both. I wish you’d never found me. Beatings never hurt as much as this, and I could avoid those just by being a good boy. You assholes had to come in and fucking take from me everything I ever knew and replace it with you! And now you’re going away and I’m going to be alone and I can’t do that matt. I can’t be alone. I don’t know how, please. Please don’t leave me, please...” He started off angry but ended sobbing as Matt lurched forward in the tiny space, so they could squeeze together.

“Come on man, I’m not going anywhere.”

“Just kill me Matt. Kill me, I hate this. I hate feeling like this. All the time, it sucks! I just want to go back to when we were all together in liberty city. We thought our old crew fucked us but no, it was that god dam city. It took Jeremy and now this crappy town is going to take you too.” Matt tried to hush him, his fingers running through Trevor’s hair, murmuring against his forehead.

“Oh Trevor, I’m sorry. I’ve been so frustrated and been taking it out on you. I’m not going anywhere buddy, you’ll see. We’re gonna be together forever. You and me, we’re going to survive this alright?”

He reassured closing his eyes as he held his sobbing friend close. All the affection that had been missing lately flooded back into him as he remembered how much Trevor meant to him. The idea of losing him on top of already losing Jeremy was bringing things back into perspective. He just couldn’t bear the thought of Trevor dyeing.

“I wouldn’t be so sure about that matt. Surviving would be quiet the feat.” Trevor sucked in a breath and Matt’s heart dropped out at the voice. They both looked to their trailer door where Geoff Ramsey stood, leant up against the doorframe, head cocked at them. Behind him in the shadows stood a skull, glinting in the dim. Then Michaels face appeared at Geoff’s shoulder blocking the death omen from sight as he smiled nastily.

“Ready to go for a ride boys?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part two will be up soon, i'm trying to get it out but i do have to live my life lol. Hope you liked where this is going, i'd love to hear your theorys cause the next one is going to be bloody and angsty hehe  
> See you soon!


	29. The choice (part two)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan finally has his hands on Jeremy's brothers. It's not pretty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big chapter again, had no idea where to cut it so yeah hope you got time.  
> So i disturbed myself writing htis. I cannot stress enough it's bad ahead people. Ryan is PISSED, ok? so yeah, read on with catiuon. Without any more messing about, here you are, part two and i am really sorry ok? not sorry enough to right a rainbows an butterflies thing but hey, your here for this dark stuff anyway right?  
> Right?  
> Enjoy if you can

Nothing sobers a man up like the sight of a skull mask in the dark. Rough hands pulled Matt from him, Matt kicking out and shouting, trying desperately to free himself. Michael was unrepentant, swinging a hard fist into Matts head, stunning him. Trevor on the other hand, hardly resisted at all. Geoff’s arms were almost guides rather than restraints.

He listened to Matt fight the whole way out to the car, heard him cry out as he was hit again for his trouble. Trevor didn’t look up, his body settling into a numbness that had him staring at the ground. Instincts from his years locked away came back to him.

Don’t make eye contact.

Be quiet.

Follow instructions.

Be a good boy and you won’t get hurt.

Glassy eyed he was pushed against the car, his hands roughly dyed behind his back as on the opposite side the same treatment for Matt.

“Oh you know what level of fucked you are don’t you?” Geoff commented as he pulled the straps cuttingly tight. Trevor nodded still numb as he was sat down, Michael between himself and Matt, the man putting an arm around their shoulders. Trevor had a peek at Matt as he was getting in, blood already marking the blonde mans beard and his glasses were gone.

“So fellas, good to see ya again.” Geoff commented as he got in the front, Vagabond the driver’s seat.

“Now if I had been you, I would have skipped states. No, scratch that, the whole fucking country. Got to say, it was pretty ballsey setting up shop in sandy shores.” Trevor just stared ahead at the back of the seat, ignoring the heavy weight of Michaels arm on his shoulders. Matt couldn’t stay quiet on the other side.

“Please, Geoff it was an accident. We would never want to hurt Jeremy. We’re not bothering you. Please, we’ll leave the country this time, I swear.”

“But you did hurt him. Hurt him pretty bad. I don’t like seeing any of my boys in pain guys. Beside’s what were you doing up there then? If you weren’t out to kill Jeremy for leaving you for us?”

“What? No! We weren’t trying to kill Jeremy! It was an accident! Please believe us!”

Geoff scoffed and Trevor saw in his peripherals, the bosses head turn to Matt in the back seat.

“Mogar, you believe that?” he asked causally and Michaels grip tightened painfully. Deep inside where he had retreated, Trevor begged matt to shut up. Good boys do not speak back.

“I dunno Geoff. I can’t think why else they’d be up there. I didn’t appreciate the cement chips I had to pick out of my calves by the way. Which one of you two was the sniper huh?” Thankfully Matt stayed silent as ice travelled down Trevor’s spine. Michael looked between them seriously while Geoff scoffed again.

“Bear got your tongue boys?” he asked and the first sentence that Vagabond spoke sent Trevor’s bladder twisting uncomfortably.

“I’ll have them soon enough.” Was the deep threatening rumble, the two other Fakes laughing at what was not a joke. Trevor couldn’t help the small whimper that came out and on the other side of the car, Matt sucked in a watery breath.

The drive didn’t last long so they knew they were still in the sandy shores area. They drove into an old property, one either on loan to the Fakes or abandoned. Trevor leant towards loaned because as they pulled up, he heard the snorts of pigs a few stalls over. Geoff unlocked the door and grabbed Trevor’s arm, pulling him out and too his feet. On the other side, matt cried out as Michael shoved him, sprawling into the dirt.

Vagabond cocked a thumb towards the house, lights were all off. They were marched forward, matt only showing a token amount of force and Trevor being a model prisoner.

“I hope you appreciate the lengths we went to here. Had to pay alot of money to get this house for a few days.” Geoff’s use of the word ‘days’ echoed in Trevor’s head, knowing that by the end of it, he would welcome death, “Can’t use any of our own places. It would be obvious as dicks for your boy toy to come find you.”

“Ex-Boy toy. He’s mine now.” Vagabond corrected Geoff.

“Right, of course. Ex-boy toy. See we love Lil’J. He’s a lovable guy,” Geoff used the correction as Vagabond opened the door and they were pushed inside, then down the stairs towards the basement, “Who wouldn’t want him in their crew? My problem is he’s too damn loyal.”

There, were two chairs, backs against each other and ropes to tie them down. Vagabond took over after Geoff pressed Trevor into the seat. He felt the chair shift slightly as Matt was shoved in behind him. As Michael and Vagabond worked, Geoff folded his arms and continued. Even through Matt being knocked again when he tried to resist.

“You fuckers stabbed him, and he still wouldn’t give you up. So what’s going to happen here is, you are going to disappear. Problem solved, no more torn loyalties.” Geoff smirked, Trevor catching it before he let his head hang, “but before you do. Vagabond has a bone to pick with you. You can’t just have a quick little painless death when you attacked a top tier Fake AH.”

“You’re a bastard Geoff!” Matt yelled at the end of the spiel, pulling at his bound arms as Michael backed up, smirk to match Geoff's on his face.

“We didn’t fucking mean to hurt him! We just wanted him to come with us and leave all you sick fucks!” he cried out and Trevor knew that Matt was going to get them both killed the more he resisted. However, instead of the pained cry he was expecting, a soft hand cupped Trevor’s chin, forcing his face up to look into the blue eyes of Ryan. The mask had come off and that more than anything told Trevor he was going to die horribly.

“Hey Trevor. You ok there?” Ryan asked him in his nicest dad voice. Good boys answer direct questions. However, good boys gave the answers their masters wanted, not the truth so he nodded his face into Ryan's hand who sighed.

“Damn it. He’s out of it.” He said standing up and moving out of view.

“Out of it? The fuck does that mean? We haven’t even touched him.” Michael complained and Trevor felt Matts head shift against the back of his.

“Trevor, I love you.” Matt said quickly to him, as their tormentors held a small conference. Trevor ignored Matt’s murmuring, focusing only on staring at the ground and listening to his masters voices so he would know what was expected of him.

“He’s been tortured before I’d say, or brutalised in some way. He’s retreated back into himself, I can barely see a spark.” Ryan was saying and there was the clink of metal highlighting his voice.

“I’m going to have to remind him about his body.” Ryan said and Trevor dimly wondered what that meant until he reminded himself good boys weren’t curious. He blanked his mind quickly before anyone could see he was still thinking.

“No! Please! Don’t do it! Ryan no!” Matt started to call and Trevor heard Geoff order Matt gagged.

“Now he uses my name.” Ryan chuckled and squatted down in front of Trevor, moving his head back to looking at him. Matt’s voice still yelled though now it was muffled hard, another sound of flesh hitting flesh quieting him. Trevor ignored what was going on behind him to focus on Ryan's face as ordered by the gent.

“Look at me, that’s it. Hey, there we go. Just keep looking straight at me.” he coached and Trevor did so even when the hand on his chin went away. Ryan smiled, his face so kind and understanding that Trevor started to see why Jeremy might want to be with him. A gentle pressure on his hand, Ryan taking it firmly.

“Ok, so I need you to understand something. I’m not doing this for me. This isn’t work, so I’m not vagabond. This isn’t play, so you don’t get to see my kingdom. This is for Lil’J. Jeremy. MY Jeremy. Not yours. So I need you right here with me. Can you come out on your own, or do you want my help?” Trevor said nothing, not knowing what the right answer was. They sat in silence for a moment until Ryan's eyes crinkled at him kindly.

“All right then. Let’s get you back huh? We want you nice and with it. Ready for the rollercoaster?” This was a simpler answer, yes or no. Since he didn’t know what the rollercoaster was he just nodded his head. Good boys gave the answer they thought the master wanted to hear.

Ryan saw that Trevor was still gone, his eyes almost completely empty. There was nothing for it. Behind Trevor Matt was freaking out, no amount of Michael trying to stun him keeping him down. Wide eyes begged over Trevor’s shoulder, tears running down his face.

Ryan ignored it, focusing instead on bring the knife down onto the lowest joint on Trevor’s pinkie finger, smiling all the while. They tried to take Jeremy away from him. They had almost killed his Lil’J. They wanted Ryan to go back to being alone, the only monster in a group of monsters that could see the life spark. It only seemed appropriate that he take something from them.

Trevor came to life as Ryan dug into the joint, body spasming in its bounds and Ryan fought to keep the hand still. Trevor was screaming nonsense, head thrown back and side to side, desperately trying to get away from the pain. Ryan worked quickly and surely, severing tendons and working the point deeper until he could pop out the bone. The point of the knife grated against the bone of Trevor’s hand, blood soaking the arm of the chair and covering Ryan’s fingers as he worked. Once the finger was popped out it was a simple matter to cut the remaining muscle and flesh, Ryan standing up with his prize, admiring it in the light.

Once it was gone, shock kicked in and Trevor’s screams died out as his head became mush, dizziness darking the edges of his vision. Ryan saw him sway and came forward quickly, grabbing either side of Trevor’s face, the man’s finger now against his cheek and the knife that took it from him against the other.

“Whoa, hey, hey. Stay with me. come on don’t give up on me now. This is just starting!” He pulled back a hand and slapped him, making his head ring but his vision steady.

“there we go. You back now? Fully with us?” He asked smiling happily at him.

“You Fucker!! AHH!! FUCK!!!” Trevor yelled, throwing himself side to side, trying to get free or get away from his hand which screamed at his body that something was wrong. Ryan just shifted back, brandishing his knife and curling his hand around the finger.

“And that’s the way it’s done.” He told his friends who had sat back and watched the whole thing coldly. Trevor was swearing and cursing as he sobbed, unable to stop looking at where his finger used to be. His fingers flexed and more blood seeped from the horrible dark hole. His mind just couldn’t comprehend it was gone.

Geoff wandered back towards the chairs, Michael leaning against the bench. Ryan was replacing the knife and washing his hands in the sink so Geoff stood in front of matt who glared up at him despite the fear etched into every part of his body.

“So, you boys listening?” Geoff asked and Trevor quietened so he could hear what fresh horror awaited them, “Good now listen to daddy. You have been bad boys. Your little excuse isn’t much better than the story of the flat out attempt on Jeremy’s life. It just makes you double the traitors because not only were you trying to kidnap a member of my crew, the crew you were also apart of, you suck so bad, are so incompetent that you almost killed him!” His voice grew hard as he spoke, Ryan turning around, hands now clean to watch Geoff circle the chairs.

“I don’t like traitors. I like them even less when they get away with it. These few months have been, trying to say the least. You fucks, have been a pain in my god dam side. People have been asking questions, snooping around all because of you ASSHOLES!” he hit Trevor without warning, the lanky man making a low cry of pain, his remaining fingers tightening automatically before pain lanced up his arms reminding him of the loss of his finger.

“Kovic is asking questions! Seems to think were equals all of a sudden! Roosters are sniffing around, trying to follow my people! I got problems guys and I don’t need your shit on TOP OF THEM!” he grabbed the arms of matt and shouted into his face, before clocking him, making him see stars for a moment.

“Not only did you attack crew, you also cost me valuable time! Time is money remember? Especially since I had to wait MONTHS for my sniper to heal up! Plus I have to replace you morons! Know what that means? Fucking meetings! I hate meetings! In fact I do everything I can to avoid meetings!” He had paced around the chairs again as he ranted, Michael tilting his head slightly as beside him Ryan rocked on his heels. Both were waiting for Geoff to wrap this up so they could get to work.

“This will not be quick. This will not be pretty. I guarantee you, you’re going to wish that Jeremy had just given you up the moment he woke. Chances are, if he had, you would have just got a quick bullet.” He knelt in front of Matt, pulling out Matts glasses and sliding them onto his face so he could see the open expression on Geoff's face.

“Ok, well, have fun. I’m just gonna leave you here in the capable hands of Ryan for a little while. I’m am going to see if there’s any food in this shit hole.” He said brightly, clapping his hands together. He pointed to Michael who knew what to do, pulling out his phone and opening up the camera.

“Don’t worry Geoff, I’ll film all the kinky shit.” He assured Geoff, flicking his fingers in a salute as he squared up the footage.

“Just don’t get my face.” Ryan warned and Michael smiled.

“Don’t worry rye, I got ya covered. I’ll only film the action shots, promise and plus we can edit it together later.”

“Sounds good to me. I hear these two are into threesome’s with a dominant guy. Let’s show them how dominant I can be huh?”

He rumbled and picked up the knife again as Geoff left, telling them he’d bring food back soon. Ryan let Geoff leave then circled once around them before pausing in front of matt.

“I think we should even out the amount of fingers in here, don’t you?” he said with that deadly smile, moving closer to the thief as he screamed and rocked in his chair. Michael came close, focusing in on the long delicate skilled fingers as the knife pricked the skin. Trevor cried with him, feeling it all over again, the ghost of the knife digging into his own flesh as he listened to Matt’s pain.

Matt’s finger joined Trevor’s in the tin marked ‘left overs’. Matt had turned his head, throwing up behind his gag, choking until Ryan freed it. Once it was gone he gagged out the contents of his stomach. As he was doing that, Ryan grabbed a bucket and filled it with water, tipping it over the thief to clean the mess at least a little. He liked his canvases to be clean enough that they could fully appreciate every mark.

“There we go, feel better?” he said, throwing the bucket aside and kneeling in front of matt. Torture revealed things about people. It revealed in Matt a bravery the thief never normally expressed. His bad hand shaking violently, he curled his remaining fingers until only the middle one showed. Michael scoffed behind Ryan, zooming in on matt’s hands, having captured the severing of the other. Ryan saw the gesture and grinned.

“Thank you for volunteering another finger.” He said coldly, extending a hand and snapping at Michael. Mats eyes widened and he stopping giving the finger, shaking his head. He might have wanted to tell Ryan to go fuck himself, but he didn’t want him to take another finger. Michael handed Ryan another knife, this one combat serrated on one side, hand still steady on the phone, careful to keep Ryan out of frame except his hands.

Behind Matt, Trevor had recovered, shouting behind his gag and testing his bonds. He was throwing himself side to side and managed to get his chair to shift which caught Ryan's attention as the killer was working on Matts hand. He left the thief alone and circled to face Trevor.

“stop that.” He ordered and Trevor stilled, looking up at him chest heaving with fear and eyes sparklingly delightfully to the murderers gaze. Ryan gestured to him with the knife.

“You need to be patient. I’ll come back to you don’t worry.” He reassured Trevor and went to walk around again but Trevor tried shouting through his gag again, his hands white and red were they gripped the chair arms, his injured one still seeping blood slowly. Ryan frowned, stilling Trevor again with the point of the knife on his cheek.

“Stop causing a fuss. I’m already furious at you two. Do not make it worse.” He threatened and Trevor’s eyes were incredulous, his hand throbbing.

“Worse? You’ve taken our fucking fingers!” matt found his voice and Ryan smiled, patting Trevor’s cheek roughly then back around to chat with matt.

“Only the shortest one. Like you tried to do to me.” he pointed out, spreading his arms like it was inevitable, “You're the one who volunteered the middle finger. I was going to move back a step but you just had to flip me off didn’t you?”

“Your comparing Jeremy to a finger?!” Matt shrieked, pain making his volume uncontrollable. Ryan came forward quickly, pressing the knife just under matt’s eye, his glasses no protection. Ryan's feral face filled his vision, the eyes the most haunting feature.

“I’m comparing the pain I’m going to inflict on you to the pain I went through as he lay dying! I’m going to make you both suffer, worse then he suffered battling against sepsis as you two ran for your cowardly fucking lives!”

“We got the medication he needed! We weren’t going to leave but he made us!”

“Made you? MADE YOU?!” Ryan snarled and grabbed Matt’s hand, ignoring the protest as he sawed quickly through the end of matts middle finger. This one was messy, no surgical popping out of the bone, but a rough cut right through the bone itself as Matt threw his shoulders back and screamed hard enough he tasted blood.

“I would never have left him to bleed out! I would have stayed! Fuck the consequences! I would have stayed and died for a mistake like that! He can never MAKE ME LEAVE!” Ryan was shouting over Matts screams, Michael making sure to get the moment when the finger fell to the ground. Matt gagged again and Ryan back handed him with the hand not holding the knife, refusing to let him tip into blessed unconsciousness.

“God vagabond, is he going to bleed out?” Michael asked as he filmed the blood spray as the finger was chopped and now it flowed strong from the white and black mess that used to be a hand. Ryan growled grabbing matts hair and forcing his face up to look at him.

“Jeremy almost bleed out. He had to have strangers blood pumped into him. Someone else was inside my prince. You... you and your fucking friend,” At the word friend, he used matts head to smack the back of Trevor’s, snarling, “almost fucked the best thing that’s happened to me in a long fucking time.”

He let Matts head go, slumping and moaning in pain. Ryan paced around the chairs as he finally addressed Michael.

“Nah, they won’t bleed out yet. Maybe a little shock but that’s the joy of two.” He stopped in front of Trevor, the man looking up at him fearfully, as Ryan started to grin, happy again.

“While one catches his breath, I can work with the other one.” Trevor groaned past his gag, tears falling as Ryan came close to him again. Those intense eyes searched his, making sure he was still with them.

“So which one of you did it huh? Which one slid in the knife? As a bonus, I’ll take an answer to who shot at Michael. He takes that kinda stuff personally.”

“Fuck yes I do. Who the fuck was that?” Michael put in, putting down his phone for a second now that they were talking. Ryan lifted the knife and pressed it to Trevor’s cheek, the lithe man feeling the tacky blood of his brother on his skin as he panted.

“I’m going to remove the gag. You are going to tell me the answers to my questions. If you don’t, then losing a finger is going to be the least painful thing I can think to do.” Trevor whimpered in response as the knife pricked his skin then the gag came out. The knife shifted out of sight and he could think again.

“Please. Please, Jeremy loves us. If you love him, then you’d never hurt him like this.”

“Pfft, please. As if he’d love you after the shit you put him through. Beside’s I think I know Jeremy a bit better then you do.”

“Bullshit. We’ve been with him for years.”

“Not this last year though. This last very important year of his life. You have no idea,” he chuckled cruelly, the smile widening into a chilling grin, “No idea what Jeremy has become...” and with that ominous fact, he got up and pressed a finger to Trevor’s nose, making him recoil hard.

“Bop.” Ryan laughed then shifted to find a new toy. Trevor craned his neck trying to see but Michael hit him, making his head snap on his neck away from where Ryan was tinkering.

“Bitch, you can wait and see what he gets you.” Michael said coldly, fingering his phone again. Trevor looked up to him, eye’s desperate.

“Please Michael. Come on man, we were friends! You taught us how to fight and we used to come in the night just like you wanted.” He tried to beg but Michaels face was closed.

“Yeah, fat load of good you did me. Beside’s that’s behind me now. As for teaching you how to fight, well you were useless students. You never did learn aggression did you? At least matt put up a fight, you just let us drag your ass here.” Ryan was back but Michael wasn’t finished, leaning down on his knees so his face was eye level with Trevor, “I was the first one on that roof. I found your so called fucking brother. Side wide open and a god damn pool of blood. I had to talk to him, fucking keep him awake. You know what he said? ‘Pal knifed’ I thought he meant the snipers pal but no, he meant his pal. His fucking friend. Stuck him like a pig and fled to preserve his own worthless hide. Ryan's right. We would never fucking leave one of our own like that.”

Trevor sobbed, guilt, pain and fear rolling over him like a wave. Michael gave a snort of derision then hit him again.

“No, no. You don’t get to sit there and feel sorry for yourself fuckface. You don’t deserve self fucking pity.”

“Couldn’t have said it better myself Michael. Can I get a hand here? I want them to see each other.” Together they turned the chairs so Matts good hand was pressed against Trevor’s mutilated one. Matt hardly stirred as they shifted him so Ryan threw more water in his face to bring him around. Once they were both awake and looking to him he started to flick a lighter as he spoke.

“OK. Now. Does anyone want to volunteer? Tell me which part you played? Tell you what, I’ll make this easy. The sniper get’s Michael, the one with the slippery knife hand get’s me.” He looked between them, face open and kind again as Michael folded his arms glaring. Ryan shrugged his shoulders, closing his hand over the lighter completely.

“No? Gonna stay stum huh? Ok, I’ll sweeten the deal. I promise, whoever gets me, I’ll only use my hands, just like Michael will.” He threw the lighter back on the bench, wiggling his fingers at them, “Is that better? Want to speak up now?” Trevor whimpered and beside him, he heard matt make a choked noise that could have been the start of a word but cut off. Unfortunately their tormentors heard it as well, shifting like sharks around the chairs, Ryan in front of Matts face while Michael put his hands on Matts trembling shoulders.

“Yes Matt? Something to share with the class?”

“It was me.” Matt murmured, Trevor looking at him sharply, begging him to stay silent in his head.

“I did it both. It was my knife, then Trevor tried to help Jeremy while I held you off. Trevor’s innocent.” Trevor started to cry, reaching out with his remaining fingers, managing to wrap his blood slicked index finger around Matts pointer.

“No! I did it. Let Matt go!” he cried out, matching matts claim. Ryan snorted, frustrated and Michael squeezed painfully on matt’s shoulders.

“Alright, touching and all but where was that loyalty for Jeremy? You’ll die for each other here but not for him?” he pointed out and there was no good answer. Perhaps it was only because they knew the gesture was ultimately futile here. Perhaps it’s because they told themselves Jeremy would be saved by his crew. Maybe it was because Jeremy always took care of them first and himself second so they were used to letting him deal with his problems alone.

Matt shut his eyes, letting the guilt well up an engulf him, suddenly wanting to die, not to escape the pain of torture but the pain of knowing deep in his heart, he did betray Jeremy. He had left him there, fully knowing it might be too late for the fakes to save him. He gave Jeremy up for dead and fled to save his own life with Trevor.

“It was my knife.” Matt said suddenly, his voice dead. He pulled his finger from Trevor’s and looked up at Ryan.

“I’m the one who stabbed him.” He admitted, knowing he deserved whatever he got. He had failed his brother completely and utterly. Michael’s hand came off his shoulders and matt shut his eyes again as he heard Trevor cry out, Michael grabbing his hair and yanking his head back roughly.

“That would make you my sniper then.” He growled and matts regret was in giving himself up, he had thrown Trevor to the bear. He didn’t have time to dwell on that as he felt soft hands frame his face, a thumb pushing his glasses back up where they had been sliding down.

“No legacy is so rich as honesty.” Ryan told him softly, the words acting a balm against his guilty conscious. Ryan was kind enough to remove his glasses so they wouldn’t break before he proceeded to join Michael in turning these two into human bruises. As his mind dipped back and forth between conscious and unconscious, Matt excepted that he would die down here.

He just wished Trevor didn’t have to go with him.

 

Jeremy was in an amazing mood. He was full of energy and buoyant, bouncing on his heels beside Alex. They were in the club that Gavin had picked up the wife from and he was looking forward to a good night. Normally as their sniper and infiltrator, he wouldn’t do messages like this but since becoming Ryan's apprentice, he was learning to really love the sound of pain.

He wondered if blood lust was sexually transmitted.

That afternoons tumble had eased alot of his pent up aggression, mellowing him out once more. Ryan was even this side of rough, only a marking bruise over the scars of previous bites and Jeremy’s lips were swollen but not split. It showed how much they were growing together that for Jeremy, Ryan would try so hard to reign in his predilection for violence.

Gavin was amusing him by spasming on the dance floor, Jeremy moving with him, letting the drugs they had taken in the car intertwine with his golden glow. It had been a little while since his last kill but he wasn’t needing one yet. Instead it was just something that filled up all the hollow spots inside him. Something that helped his buzz as he danced with his fellow Lad. Unlike Gavin however he subtly was keeping an eye on the crowd around them, scanning for threats.

Alex sat a table, a drink untouched in front of him as he kept an eye on them. Gavin was playing bait, and playing it well, two women grinding up against him. He wrapped one lanky arm around a waist and lifted the other arm screaming a woo that could be heard over the music. Jeremy laughed, spinning quickly on the spot then bouncing to the beat, enjoying himself immensely.

His eye caught on Alex after another turn and he danced closer to Gavin, brushing his arm. Gavin detached from the mouth of the woman he was making out with and followed Jeremy’s gaze. Alex lifted a hand and with two fingers gestured to the bar twice. Both lads nodded and Gavin shoved the woman from him who pouted prettily. Gavin ran a hand over her cheek, “Sorry love, another night.” He said then pushed her face harshly from him. She swore but they were already moving away.

Jeremy, in the guise of chatting with Gavin, searched for what Alex had spotted. If he had sent them to the bar, it’s because they had caught the attention of someone. Sure enough he saw a man out of place moving through the dance floor. His eye trained, Jeremy glanced over the guy and made a few well educated assumptions.

Number one: this was not the owner himself

Number two: this man was most likely a mercenary. One who preferred the up close and personal approach.

Number Three: the mercenary would most likely win in a grapple, Jeremy still working on his physio and worn out from Ryan's demands on his body this afternoon.

Number four: things were about to get bloody.

Gavin slumped over the bench, rudely pushing people out of the way, the short but intimidating Lil’J backing him up at his elbow.

“KEEP! BARKEEP!” he shouted, waving his arms into the space where customers were not allowed.

“Arms in or they get broke!” the barman came towards them yelling over the music. Gavin pulled his arms in and hit the bench with a fist, holding up two fingers with the other hand.

“TWO SHOTS!” he called and the barman rolled his eyes, turning to get them their order. During that, the man was coming closer and Jeremy’s hand edged towards his weapon, today tucked into the back of his pants, hidden by his shirt. He wasn’t wearing his jacket tonight so shoulder holsters were out. His thumb brushed the safety, ready to pull and fire when he saw something that made his hand fall.

Alex had appeared and only a short steps away, grabbed the shoulder of the merc with a crushing grip that had him wincing towards the giant. The merc was big, but Alex was bigger. What was terrifying about Alex however wasn’t his size but the fact he pulled the merc in close, whispering into an ear. Then the merc was leaving and Alex came towards them.

“NEED ANOTHER THREE!” Gavin called to the irritated barman who was trying to serve others as well as the demanding brit. Gavin knocked back his shot and shoved Jeremy’s at him. Jeremy took it and looked to Alex who joined them. Jeremy smashed back his shot quickly as Alex sidled up between them. He leant in close so Jeremy could hear him.

“Marcus is here,” the owner/bounty setter “not happy his merc walked out. Mercs heard of us. Owners just there.” Alex gestured with his head towards the higher floor. Jeremy looked up to see a man almost as short as himself, red in the face, though that could be the lights reflecting off his skin. He also saw what seemed to be two bouncers turned bodyguards. His eyes were locked on Gavin, who turned about to see Jeremy looking up then looked up himself.

The cocky Brit made eye contact then threw back his shot before waving his fingers at the man who wanted him dead. The man seemed to snap something at his followers then Alex was yelling over the music.

“It’s go time!” He ordered and Jeremy nodded following Gavin who was making his way towards where they had seen the guy. They made their way up, meeting the owner coming down. He pointed a finger at Gavin, his shrill voice noticeable over the music.

“YOU BASTARD! YOU FUCKED MY WIFE! YOUR GOING TO FUCKING DIE!”

Gavin snorted in disbelief, at those words, the angry man coming towards him with his two guards. In a move that was flawless between the three, the fakes pulled weapons. Jeremy’s was silenced as was his inclination, getting the left bodyguard dead centre of the eyes. Alex on Gavin's other side got the right bodyguard, his gun making the tell tale noise, a vintage pistol that shredded through cloth and into vulnerable torso. Lastly, Gavin golden gun glinted in the lights, the Brit looking dangerously feral as he didn’t break stride, pressing the gun to the owners throat, shoving him back up the stairs as the clubbers shrieked and cried out.

As Gavin dealt with his owner, Alex stood up where people could see him, firing his gun twice into the air. Jeremy pointed his weapon at the DJ and mimed cutting his throat so the music went dead.

“Sorry this club is now under renovations! This is now under control of the Fake AH crew! Get the fuck out!” Alex called and there was a stampede for the door. He turned back to find Gavin had tucked Marcus into a booth, sitting across the way from the owner with his legs crossed comfortably and his gun pointed at chest over the table.

“Hello love. I hear you’re a bit miffed off at me. Is that right?” gavin was asking softly, the attitude of the owner having changed from murderously angry too pissing his pants.

“You ah... You slept with Maria..” he said hesitantly his eyes on the gun.

“Oh, Marcus and Maria, that’s nice, has a ring to it don’t it my lad?” Gavin asked of Jeremy who came forward placing a hand on Gavin's shoulder. Alex gestured he was going downstairs, most likely to secure the entrance as Jeremy spoke quickly.

“Cops are going to be minutes out Gav, might want to make this quick.” Gavin nodded to that and shifted his gun hand, making the gun wave to and fro, Marcus following it like he was hypnotised.

“This right here, this is my favourite weapon. My handgun of pimps. That has a nice ring to it too. You want to know how I got it?” He asked, and then paused as his phone trilled a message. He pulled it out and glanced at it before throwing it down on the table, focused on his fun. Curious, Jeremy couldn’t help peeking down at it.

M-Holy fuck gav, R really is a fucking savage madman, I almost feel sorry for the traitors.

“I got it as a gift. My friend said he took it from someone who didn’t deserve nice things. That’s a mantra I can take to heart my friend. Your wife was pretty nice...” Jeremy stopped following the conversation, bottom of his stomach dropping out.

No, no way. No way Ryan would do this. No way his crew would do this. They couldn’t have his brothers. NO. WAY.

But... Ryan had been so happy all day. Geoff didn’t bring up loyalties at all, which Jeremy had fully expected after the fight of last night. The mystery mission...

That ASSHOLE!

It clicked into place and his years as an infiltrator schooled his expression to neutral. The roaring of his dark self washed the drugs, alcohol and glow in his system away. Inside him as a whirl storm, picking up every thought and slamming it to pieces inside a shattered ,rage filled mind. His eye’s however didn’t even twitch. Alex came back up the stairs throwing a finger in the air and spinning it.

“Time’s up gav, we got to go!” He called and Gavin sighed, fully extending his gun.

“And I never got to finish my speech.” He said sadly then yelled a protest when Jeremy smashed out the lights of Marcus. His crew looked to him in confusion and he shrugged.

“Ass tried to get Gavin killed. I say we take him home and make him sing for us.” He commented and his suspicions were practically confirmed by the look shared between the two. He ignored it, trying to take the weight of Marcus but his side protesting. Alex gently pushed him out of the way and they heard sirens approaching.

“Move, I got him.” He said shortly, nothing for it but to take their package and run. As they made for the back exit where they had stowed the getaway vehicle, Jeremy was behind them a little, covering their sixes. He was still close enough to hear Gavin whisper to Alex.

“They are getting more alike all the time.”

“I know, it’s a good thing though gav. Only extends the distraction”

“Yeah maybe he won’t be so pissed when he finds out since he’s up for a bit of revenge too.” Alex shushed him harshly at that and glanced over his unencumbered shoulder but Jeremy showed no outward sign that he had heard. They got into the car and peeled out of there, narrowing avoiding the search radius of the cops. Jeremy fought to keep his emotions behind the mask of control and now fully understood the vagabond mask. Two hours of avoiding cops was two more hours Trevor and Matt were in Ryan's capable and skilled hands.

Alex went into the interrogation room first, sitting the unconscious man on the chair. He had to be hit twice more during the chase so now he just slumped as alex secured him. Gavin came in, folding his arms and grinning.

“All this over a bird.” He scoffed and turned to say something else, but falling silent at the sight of Jeremy standing there, one hand on the door.

“Ah, Lil’J? You coming in?” he asked hesitantly, not understanding the look on Jeremy’s face. The lad was undoubtedly furious, his eyes the demented ones he had seen the first time Jeremy had killed and had come upstairs, throwing Gavin into a counter. At Gavin's question, Alex turned and he figured it out quicker then Gavin did.

“Oh fuck me...” he said in frustration, arms dropping to his sides.

“Looking for your phone or your gun Alex? Cause I got your phones right here.” Jeremy patted his own pocket, “Little trick I picked up from my brother Matt. As for your gun, well... I’m pretty sure I can draw faster than you.”

Jeremy’s voice was sarcastic but dead, Alex lifting his hands slowly, Gavin doing the same.

“Lil’J come on. You’re not going to kill us? We’re lads, lad!” Gavin commented and Jeremy looked at him hard.

“Oh yeah? We’re lads huh? Team lads forever? When were you going to tell me about them huh? The whole fucking crew knows but me don’t they?”

“Jeremy, we didn’t want to hurt you-“

“So you fucking hid it from me? No Alex, I get it. I’m not trusted am I? Took a fucking bullet for you remember? Fucking saved you from a car bomb Gavin. When you needed cover fire, you’re happy to call on me.” Jeremy’s hand tightened on the door and his other hand twitched as he glared at them.

“But this is my family, my fucking brothers and no one says a god damn word... fuck you guys.”

“What’s the plan then J? Wot, you’re going to rescue them? You know we’ll track you forever. No one leaves Jeremy, we’re your family now. We won’t let you run from us if you turn.” Gavin said speaking low and passionately, one hand slowly extending towards him, “Please Lil’J. Don’t you love it here? With us? Alex and Geoff are like parents to us. The orphans of crime taken in. Me and Michael, we’re your brothers. Your lil’Lads. Lil’Lads for Lil’J.” Alex swallowed, hoping Gavin's golden tongue would get them through this but it wasn’t to be. Jeremy wavered for a moment, then his eyes teared up and his face turned ugly. He pulled his gun and pointed it at them, Alex grabbing Gavin and throwing him behind him.

“Whoa Jeremy!” he called out but Jeremy’s yelling drowned him out.

“What about Ryan! You mention him!? Because he’s out there right now pulling my brothers apart! I cannot just hang out here with you secret keeping fuckers while that’s happening!” Alex held out both hands pleadingly.

“Jeremy you don’t want to do this.” He tried again and Jeremy nodded quickly.

“Your right Alex. I don’t. But I got no other choice,” his face became soft, staring through them at something else as his voice fell in volume becoming sadder, “I never really did.”

He focused back on them and hardened once more.

“Goodbye guys. It’s been fun and I love you” He said then stepped back, slamming the door shut and sliding the bolt home. Alex rushed the door, slamming into it, too late to stop him from locking them in.

“Jeremy! Jeremy come back! Wait!” Both he and Gavin yelled but Jeremy was already walking away, dashing the tears from his face and pulling out their phones. He went to Alexs first, finding quickly all the information he needed to find Ryan and his brothers. He tried to open Gavin's too but the security on it proved too great so he settled for pulling the battery out of both and tossing them aside.

He got into the car, speeding off then heading into the city. It wasn’t long before he enticed a cop car to start chasing and shooting at him. Once that was done, he called Geoff as he fought to keep a safe distance between himself and the now two cars chasing him without actually losing them. He wanted the sirens and the bullet to be loud and real.

“Geoff! Oh god! It went sideways!” he cried out, panic in his voice when his boss answered.

“Jeremy? What? What is it?”

“The cops! They fucking were staking out the place! We were made! I got separated from trial and error and- FUCK!” he shot out his own window, the glass making a racket and bullets tinging on his panelling nicely.

“Fuck Geoff! I need back up! No idea where gav and Alex are! We are fucked!”

“Alright, we’re coming to you, right now! Where are you?” Geoff voice cracked with the force of his worry and deep inside, Jeremy's dark self snarled in happiness to hear it.

“Fuck, I’m in downtown, fucking heading to the Do-“ he threw his phone onto the dash and shot it so it sizzled and died immediately. If that didn’t get them fleeing from the farm area, he didn’t know what would. He was banking on Ryan and Geoff being so furious at his brothers that they’d simply secure them for further torture before they left. If they didn’t and they killed them instead... he didn’t know how to feel about that.

He put the sports car through its paces now, actually attempting to shake the heat and succeeding as he was only wanted for ramming the first car and taking a few shots at them. That was basically a misdemeanour in this town. He would be at the farm in just under two hours, maybe an hour if he could navigate the hills without flipping the car.

 

“Get your ass up here we need to talk.” Geoff ordered from the top of the stairs. Ryan sighed and straightened from where he had been working on Trevor’s legs, the legs of his pants cut away. He dropped the lighter on the bench and went to the sink to wash his hands. The smell of burnt flesh, blood, bile and urine was all in the air, Michael having retreated upstairs sometime earlier, around the moment Matt lost toes and Trevor had thrown up everywhere.

The chairs were still shifted so they were side by side, arm rest pressed close together. Ryan had stated he wanted them to see everything he did to the other. Witness they had, the cold killer chatting to them all the while, telling them how much he was enjoying this, how he owned Jeremy, how they would ever see their brother again. They had lost track of time, only concentration on the flinch as Ryan debated which one to start in on next.

The beatings had taken alot out of them but after Ryan and Michael had worked out the initial fury, there had been a brief break. Geoff had come back with food for his men and the three had eaten as they admired the job the heavy hitters were doing. Both traitors were forced to swallow water and their wounds were tended too. Ryan had seared the ends of their finger holes and stitched faces. Michael had tipped water over them again and they had their mouths washed out. Geoff had left shortly after, with Michaels phone, wanting to review the footage Michael had taken. The rest had been Ryan's personal revenge.

Trevor’s head lolled listlessly, a line of pink saliva dripping onto his thighs. He longed for death, knowing that they were only really partway through, everything Ryan had done so far was survivable. By his side, matt was crying silently, not able to control the tears. He too was longing, longing for Jeremy to come save them. Jeremy had always saved them. He pulled a young boy from a box and in return that boy spent their whole lives watching his back. Trevor had patched him up every time Jeremy had come home from a hit injured, the two of them flanking the hit man through the night when he shook so hard, the things the young man had seen haunting him. Surely he’d remember that? Surely he would stop this mad man cutting into them? Sure they had fucked up but Jeremy was a forgiving person. He’d forgive them. He had too.

He sobbed once, brokenly, his mouth swollen from repeated hits. His jaw felt loose and he barely had the energy to turn his head and look to Trevor. Trevor’s ear was a mess of gore, Ryan having sliced away the lobe, claiming that if Trevor was going to not use his ears and listen to everything he had to say, then he’d take them from him one piece at a time. Matt’s glasses were slick on the bloodied bridge of his nose, but he could still see everything in horrible detail.

Trevor made a small motion with his hand, drawing matts attention to it. Trevor’s hand with its missing finger was twitching to the side where he sat. His good hand stretched out and between the two, he could just curl his pointer and middle finger around the index of Trevor’s hand once more as they waited for death.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I"M SORRY!!! MATT TREVOR! i really didn't want to do this but this was the way it would go... also i'm sorry to you the readers but yep, theres a part three... I wanted to wrap it up in two chapters but it was way too long so now they'll be another chapter. I swear it will wrap up this arc and please don't hate me forever!  
> Kudos and Especially Comments are apreiciated, i'd love to know what you thought cause i was tearing up writing it so i hope it did the same to you... in a good way  
> ...I swear i'm not a monster...  
> See you soon....  
> ;)


	30. the choice (part thee)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy has to decide who he wants to be

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> long note at the bottom just fyi.  
> read with catioun ahead, it's just dark, i dunno how else to discribe it withuot spoilers  
> Enjoy guys! this is it! the end!

Jeremy approached the farmhouse on foot. Light was on the horizon as he scuffled into bushes overlooking the area. He pushed away the thought that his brothers had been with Ryan most of the night, instead searching for any sign that his crew were still here. There were no vehicles in sight and no movement except for the animals in their pens.

By placing, Alex, Gavin and himself in a fictitious dangerous situation, there was no way any of them would want to be left behind. Still, he stuck to cover, moving slowly as he approached the main house. He was only armed with his side arm and his personal knife. It was twin to the one he had given Matt when they had turned eighteen, just before finding Trevor.

Twin to the one that had buried itself in his side.

He pushed that thought away, concentrating on moving silently. He jimmied open the back door with his knife, slipping inside into the dim with silenced gun in hand. As much as he wished to run down into the basement, where Alex’s phone said they had set up, he quickly checked the above floors. He found signs that his crew had been here, a whisky bottle on the table, the Fakes symbol carved into wood.

He heard nothing so he finally approached the basement. He opened the door a crack, peering down into the dark, the lights having been shut off. He had no choice but to flick the lights by the door and suck in a breath. From his view, he could see his brothers, seated side by side near the bottom of the stairs, both still.

He came down, gun raised, eye’s locked on them. Trevor’s head was flopped back, the lights illuminating a busted face. His eyes were black and closed, the handsome features completely disfigured by split and swollen flesh. His shirt had been cut away, his chest also a tapestry of bruising, the end of one arm was a hand covered in blood. His long legs were also exposed, showing weeping and blistered flesh amongst the downy hair.

Matt’s face was just as bad, made more dramatic by the fact his glasses were shoved onto a face that was too big for them. His shirt was still on but there was slices in it, highlighted by rusted brown in the material. His hand also ended in a mess, Jeremy could see more clearly that he was missing fingers. His pants had also been sliced away at the knees, one foot shorter than the other on the side. This was almost missed as down his calf, strips of skin was missing, the blood almost obscuring the realisation Matt had lost two toes to match his fingers.

Jeremy’s gun hand fell, letting the weapon hang by his hip as he brought a hand to his face, covering his mouth. This was no face changing Edgar. This wasn’t something for a job, some asshole who had fucked the crew over in business. This was for him. Because of him. His brothers were sitting there, lifeless and still because they had hurt him.

Now they were hurt in return.

He turned on his heel, the gun coming up between himself and Ryan, the sandy haired man moving out from the shadows with his hands up.

“They’re not dead.” Ryan said softly, Jeremy tightening his grip, stabbing forwards with the gun.

“Back the fuck off Rye!” he threatened and Ryan obeyed, taking a step back and nodding towards the pair.

“I made sure they didn’t die. Geoff and Michael left soon after your call. They couldn’t understand why I wouldn’t want to go save you,” he gave a soft laugh, Jeremy glaring at him as Ryan rolled his shoulders in a shrug, “You had Geoff pretty dam convinced. Wasn’t fair, playing on his emotions like that. You knew if any of the crew were in danger, he would put that first.”

“But you didn’t believe it?”

“Obviously not. I know you Jeremy. I’ve told you time and time again. We are the same. I knew what was happening because had our roles been reversed, it is exactly what I would have done. I am curious though... Al and Gavin?” Jeremy hesitated before answering, unnerved by Ryan's deep dulcet voice, the enchanting effect it could have speaking to the darkness inside him.

“They’re- they’re alive. I locked them in the interrogation room.” Ryan nodded and took a step forward, Jeremy taking a step back keeping the distance the same.

“Stop, please.” He said, his voice trembling, “Don’t make me do it.”

Ryan stopped, hands still in the air, gazing at him fondly.

“Alright then. I won’t make you do a thing. You’re in charge my prince.”

“Don’t call me that!” Jeremy snapped, threatening Ryan with his weapon.

“Why not? You are still a prince are you not? To thine own self be true. You are a prince as I am a king. That is not something that can be denied even though we are outside the kingdom.”

Ryan being here was confusing Jeremy. The scent of blood enticing the dark that lived inside him. His feelings were all confused, mixed up. It was so hard to think, staring into those intense eyes, hearing that voice speak so softly. Ryan had walked him through his first few kills. Ryan had brought things out inside him that he had never felt before. He brought the dark but he also brought the gold. This dark monster wrapped inside a handsome golden body. Hands that made Jeremy tremble with need, want he had never felt before. Somehow Ryan had grown so wrapped up around everything inside Jeremy. The man loved when Ryan hurt him.

“Jeremy? Are we still not partners? Do you not long for the light as I do? It’s sitting there, behind you.” Ryan's words poured into his brain, Jeremy’s eyes flickering between his brothers and his lover, his gun shaking in his grip for the first time. He couldn’t think, the roar was growing louder. The emptiness inside him called to him to fill it.

“Shut up!” He yelled, pulling a hand from his weapon to touch his head, grabbing at his own hair.

Kill him...

Kill them...

Just kill...

Kill and everything will be good again...

“NO! Shut up! Shut up!” Jeremy shouted, shaking his head trying to clear it. Ryan's voice and expression was all concern as the gun wavered back and forth before him.

“Prince Jeremy? Lil’J?” he tried to soothe but Jeremy glared at him, his face hard and hand steady again.

“You got handcuffs down here?” he asked and Ryan nodded, gesturing towards his impromptu workspace, “Good, get them.” Jeremy ordered, his voice going dead again. Ryan shuffled, grabbing the cuffs and letting them dangle from his fingers. Jeremy gestured with his gun to the barrister at the bottom of the stairs, walking back to keep distance between them.

“Secure yourself there, hands behind you.” He commanded backing it up with a sharp cry of, “NOW!” when Ryan cocked his head at him. Ryan moved forward, his stride graceful, folding himself down smoothly to kneel before the stairs. Jeremy heard the clicks and approached cautiously. He kept the gun trained on Ryan's face as his mentor watched him carefully.

“I obey my prince. Remember? I promised.” Ryan said as Jeremy gave a tug, testing the strength of the cuffs. Ryan's arm under his palm was warm and Jeremy became aware of the blood flecks on Ryan’s bicep and the edges of his shirt. His mind supplied images side by side, both of how they got there and a memory of Jeremy licking similar markings from Ryan’s skin before.

He jerked back as if burned and Ryan looked carefully between his upper arm and Jeremy, eye’s knowing.

“I can free you my Lil’J.” Ryan said softly and Jeremy moved back now he knew Ryan was secure, turning to his brothers.

“Shut up. I need to think.” He said, tucking his gun away as he went to Matt first. He lifted the face so it was straight, cradling it his hands.

“Matt? Matty? Come on, wake up.” He said softly, fingers checking for pulse and resisting the urge to shake his battered brother.

“I’ve been using mostly water and love taps to keep them up but if you like there is adrenaline on the bench.” Ryan supplied helpfully. Jeremy’s fingers dug into matts cheeks before he remembered to loosen them. He tried calling Matts name a bit longer, Ryan watching him amused.

“What are you trying to do Jeremy? Are you choosing them over the crew? Over me? Look at them. Their pathetic and weak and not worthy of you.” Jeremy rounded on Ryan, tears in his eyes.

“You don’t understand do you? Their my brothers! I cannot believe you fucked me, lied to me then left me to go collect them! What happened to all your promises? Giving me a choice?”

“I’ve obeyed you haven’t I? Am I kneeling here now at your order? And I never lied about this. I said Geoff had a job. I asked you to trust me to tell you later. If anything, you betrayed me. But it’s ok. I forgive you Jeremy.” Jeremy scoffed, unable to argue with the man, moving back to his inspection. Matt was just unconscious but deeply so. As Jeremy suspected, fingers were indeed missing. Ryan had also cut out the letters LIL J into matt’s upper arm. Jeremy saw that and looked over at Ryan who was smiling fondly at him.

“My little token. He said he was the one who stabbed you.” Ryan said by explanation. Jeremy flinched, reminded on why he hadn’t seen his brothers in so long. Seeing them in this condition had brought out all his protective instincts, overriding his own anger. He looked back at Matt and saw boy the boy he had met so many years ago but also the man that could not understand him anymore. A man who so misread the situation, he had almost killed Jeremy.

He swallowed hard and backed up into the bench, looking from matt to Trevor. He had asked Trevor to trust him. He had said he would explain later. But they never gave Jeremy a chance. They never gave him a choice either. Look at him now, ready to throw away everything, to risk his life for them. Because it was what was expected.

“They left me.” he said quietly and Ryan nodded, shifting slightly, stretching his arms back as he leant forward.

“They did. They said you sent them away. How do you think that conversation would have gone down if it were me?”

“You’d order me to be silent and still. You would have fought the whole crew single handed.” Jeremy said slowly, looking from the broken bodies to Ryan's clear face. He smiled wide at Jeremy.

“That’s right. Say the word my Prince and I will present you with the bodies of any who dare to raise your ire.” Jeremy breathed in shakily, forcing his gaze away, squeezing his hands together. He was so torn. He loved his brothers but Ryan was something else. Something more intense, more binding then simple love. He knew that if he left with Matt and Trevor, he’d have to put Ryan down. Otherwise they would soon find themselves back in Ryan's kingdom, this time with no outside help to come for them.

“J-Jer...me..” A weak voice mouthed his name and luck had Jeremy falling before Matt who was stirring instead of seeing the look of pure mad rage that flittered across Ryan's face.

“Matt?” Jeremy called helping his oldest friend to lift his head to look at him. Through swollen black eye’s Jeremy could see a sliver of the soft brown that he had looked into for years. Something had busted in one eye filling it with blood but the other was as clear as remembered.

“You... came...” Matt breathed and Jeremy nodded, heart swelling at the hope and love in Matt’s voice. So what if matt stabbed him? So what if they had grown apart even before he had moved out. It mattered nothing they had abandoned him to save themselves. This was Matt.

He never had anything but everything he had he shared with Jeremy. Cold nights as terror clutched at him, Matt had held him tight. Whenever loneliness threatened to pull him under, matt had been there with a joke and a game. He had first killed to save matt from pneumonia. The money from that hit going towards the hotel they had stayed in.

Matt had made him into this.

Matt didn’t notice Jeremy’s face changing, so focused on the fact he was here.

“Knew... it... knew you would...rescue... us...” he gave a small grunt of pain that slipped out from under his control. He rolled an eye trying to see Trevor.

“Trevor?” he asked, wanting to know if he lived. Jeremy let numbness settle over him, betrayal fading so he could check Trevor. When he pulled the head forward, he saw something he hadn’t noticed before. Trevor was missing most of an ear and a few teeth. As he patted Trevor down, his mind supplied him with memories much as it had for Matt.

Trevor, broken and sniffling, only wanting Jeremy’s touch, quivering in fear during the night. Trevor, tall and confident, swinging around the lounge room, tap dancing on the table for the amusement of his brothers. Trevor, cuddled into his side, lazily flicking through movies. The night, one of the few good times before Jeremy moved out, when the three had gone too Trevor’s marks house and replaced all the doors with hippy beads, laughing hard when they saw the footage of a family freaking out.

He pressed hard to the side of the neck but it was no lie. There was no pulse, no rise and fall of a chest. Trevor had drowned in his own blood when his head had gone back and he had slipped unconsciousness. Jeremy rocked back on his heels then fell to his ass, ducking his head and putting his hands through his hair.

“Jeremy?” Ryan asked softly as Matt struggled to inspect Trevor.

“Trevor?” Matt called in his broken voice. Jeremy closed his eyes tight; doing everything, he could not to drown himself. It was too much. Too much. Dark self and golden glow. Pain and grief and anger and rage all pulling him in different directions. He wished he couldn’t feel a fucking thing. Trevor was dead. He was dead and it was real and he wasn’t coming back.

“Jeremy, are you alright?” Ryan asked again, straining against his restraints as matt found strength to wiggle in his own, having taken in Jeremy’s reaction and Trevor’s head where it had flopped forward.

“Trevor? No... No he’s not...” Matt cried and Jeremy snapped, hands becoming fists and slamming into the ground beside him.

“He’s dead!” he yelled at Matt who flinched back at the fury on Jeremy’s face. He couldn’t comprehend Trevor was gone and why Jeremy turned that anger on him. He was about to find out as Jeremy got to his feet, grabbing either arm of Matts chair and glaring down at him. Matt pulled his head back from the hate twisting the features of his oldest brother into a monstrous parody.

“Why couldn’t you leave well enough alone!? He’s dead because of you! I said back off! I told you! But you never listen to me! You do your own fucking thing and expect me to clean up your god damn messes! Well guess what matt?! I CAN’T BRING BACK THE DEAD!” He roared in matt’s face, the man cringing and sobbing beneath him. Then Jeremy was gone, turning to point a finger at Ryan.

“You killed him!” Jeremy accused Ryan who just gazed at him steadily.

“His head went back and you where down here before I could correct it.” He said calmly, not even blinking as Jeremy made angry strides towards him. He went with the strike, looking back as soon as he could, expression not changing.

“It was an unfortunate misjudgement. I shouldn’t have cut things so close.” Ryan said his voice still even. Jeremy hit him again then again, echoing the swelling of his brothers on Ryan’s face. The gent took it stoically, not crying out, not objecting. Jeremy was sobbing and roaring unintelligibly as he smashed his fist again and again into Ryan. Then as he pulled back his fist, he saw the flash of Trevor’s features over Ryan's face and he couldn’t bring himself to strike again.

“Are you ok?” Ryan asked, his voice weeding through the pain and Jeremy choked on a sob.

“No. No I’m not ok.” He said shattered and Ryan's voice was shushing him.

“Come here.” He ordered and Jeremy pressed himself against Ryan’s chest, the gent tilting his head over Jeremy’s unable to hug him. Jeremy sobbed into the blood flecked shirt, wanting his king to take it all away. Why did he want to make his own choices so bad? His own choices caused only hurt and pain.

“Jeremy? Jeremy please! What are you doing? Jeremy.” Matt was crying out for him from behind him. Jeremy squeezed his eyes shut, trying to tune him out. The pleading was raw against his exposed core. Jeremy didn’t want to take care of anyone else right now. As if Ryan could read his mind, his lover started to whisper into his ear, helping Jeremy focus on something else besides the desperate pleading of his brother.

“He had hurt you. I’m sorry he died like that. That was...unscheduled. But he deserved no less for how he treated you. Are you their guard dog? To come to heel whenever they call? Why ever else did they keep you around then to use you for your strength? Your brother is dead, but did Matt care how it affected you? No. He didn’t. He called for Trevor. Not you.” Jeremy sniffled, fisting Ryan's shirt in one hand and the other fist pressed to his thigh, the feeling of his fingers digging into his palm grounding him.

“I called for you. I cared about you. I have no need of your strength Jeremy. I have no weakness, no tendency to make stupid, unconsidered decision. And when the occasional mistake is made, like today, I will own up to it. I didn’t expect anything less than the punishment you gave me. I would never insist you take it for me. Your mine Jeremy, but that just means your mine to protect. To love. To care for.”

“DON’T LISTEN!” Matts voice shrieked, cutting through the haze that had been growing as Jeremy listened to Ryan's voice.

“Can’t you see you’ve been brainwashed! Trevor is fucking dead Jeremy and you’re snuggling with his FUCKING MURDERER!” Matt was desperate, scared for his life and overwhelmed by Trevor’s death. His body was a giant mess and he didn’t remember a time when something didn’t hurt. Jeremy was his only hope, the love they once had shared needed to come through.

“He’s manipulating you! If anyone is using you it’s the monster you’re fucking crying against! Jeremy please! Please fucking shoot him and we can leave! Don’t let Trevor die for nothing! He died because we love you and we couldn’t stand to see you being hurt! Ryan tortured you just like he tortured us! We saw the markings!”

“Jeremy, he’s talking about our little love marks. That was a claiming, Matt. Not a torture. Trust me, he begged me to hurt him. And I obey my prince.” Ryan laughed at Jeremy’s remaining brother who shook his head, setting it to ringing again as he pulled at his bound arms, wanting to snatch Jeremy and flee.

“He’s a monster! They all are! You don’t belong there. You belonged with us! Please, let’s take Trevor and get out! Fucking leave! Please! Jeremy, remember us? Remember everything we’ve shared? You can’t turn your back on that! Haven’t we been happy? Didn’t we all love one another!?” Jeremy did remember, lifting his head from Ryan’s chest to look over at Matt. Trevor’s body was almost peaceful looking compared to the desperation on the swollen face of his surviving family.

“I love you Jeremy. Your crew loves you. I’m sure the three of you were happy once upon a time, but that time is over. How about that empty space you told me of? The space we filled together? Can you really go back to just the two of you? Just you and Matt, always looking over your shoulder, always fearful for your fragile burden? He’ll never accept what you need. You heard what he called me. You know what he’d think of you.”

“Jeremy just fucking shoot him!”

“Here you’re treasured, respected. No one looks down on you. No one will use you like a meat shield. We’ll be partners, equals. I accept you. I help you. You’d never want with me, together we’d take everything we need.”

“Damn it Jeremy! Just move away from him please! Stop fucking listening! He’s killed Trevor! He’s a monster! Chopped us into bits, please!” Matt broke down, heaving and gagging from the force of his sobs. Jeremy slowly shifted, standing up and turning away from Ryan who strained after him.

“Jeremy? Jeremy you can’t be serious?” Ryan asked incredulous. He watched as Jeremy took up a knife, moving towards Matt and sawing at the bounds that kept him in the chair. When his arms were free, matt threw himself into Jeremy’s arms, sobbing wildly, the two rocking together. Ryan stared unable to believe it, hearing Jeremy crying with his remaining brother.

“I’m getting you out of here.” He heard Jeremy assure his shaggy friend who only held him closer with his savaged arms.

“Jeremy, Jeremy... oh thank god Jeremy, you came back to me.” Matt was crying and Jeremy gently pushed him back into the chair so he could free his legs.

“Jeremy.” Ryan’s voice throbbed with power behind him, but he kept working, Matts good hand patting through his hair, his mouth wording random praises and words of love.

“My prince, you walk up those stairs, you’ll have to kill me.” he promised and Jeremy looked over his shoulder.

“You remember what you said when you promised to obey me?” He asked Ryan not giving him time to answer, “Then I am ordering to shut your mouth and not speak to me or matt.” Ryan stared at him long and hard before he sat back on his heels, mouth becoming a straight line.

“Jeremy, we need to take him with us. We need to take Trevor out of this place. Please, we can’t leave him here.” Matt begged and Jeremy shushed him, throwing the knife aside and taking matt’s face in his hands. Matt’s hands gripped his arms, the three remaining fingers on one side feeling strange as they gripped him.

“I will not leave either of you down here. I promise you.” He pulled matt close, pressing the softest of kisses to matt’s lips, feeling him relax under his grip as he became reassured of Jeremy’s love. He let matt’s head cradle on his shoulder as he cried into matts neck. They both took a long time crying and grieving together, consoling one another as their brothers body cooled beside them and his murderer looked on.

Finally their tears ran out, the human body only able to cry for so long. Matt was near unconscious again, only Jeremy’s broad shoulders stopping him from falling out of his chair. Jeremy rubbed circles into his back, one of the few places Ryan hadn’t worked up too.

“Trevor...” Matt whimpered and Jeremy echoed him following up the name with his regret.

“Trevor, I’m sorry I wasn’t fast enough. I’m sorry I didn’t check you first.” He murmured and pressed himself against Matt, breathing deep the scent of his brother through the acidic smell of sweat and blood.

“Let’s go. Please.” Matt begged and Jeremy nodded into him, taking another deep breath before leaning back. He cupped matts cheek, their eyes meeting.

“I love you Matt.” He said sincerely, eyes welling once more. Matts unhurt hand pressed against the back of Jeremy’s.

“I love you to Jeremy.” He answered then all the air rushed out as Jeremy pulled the trigger, bullets shredding through his brothers heart. Matt looked to him, confused, mouth open but unable to form any words.

“I love you.” Jeremy said again as the light faded. There was no high this time, no golden light seeping through his pores. Just him and the emptiness where his brothers once lived. Jeremy was hollow, everything that made him human dyeing with the light in matts eyes. There was nothing. He was nothing.

 

With a grunt, Ryan broke his thumb so he could slip the handcuffs from his wrist. Now free, he came forward, pulling the weapon from Jeremy’s hand and sitting behind him so he could pool the Lad onto his lap. Jeremy had a tight grip on Matt’s body, bringing it down with them, hugging it like it was his security blanket.

Ryan folded his arms around them both, rocking and crooning quietly. Jeremy was shaking and nothing Ryan could do could still it. Underneath his hands his apprentice shattered into piece’s, eyes wide and mind gone, retreated fully from having to comprehend what Ryan had pushed him towards. As he held the man that now belonged solely to him, the tiny slice of humanity that Jeremy brought out of him whispered he had pushed too hard and too far.

 

Geoff found a mess when he returned, holding his wrist to his nose as he came down the stairs. His fury exasperated when he found them. They had fallen asleep against the counter, Ryan's head tipped over Jeremy’s shoulder, the lad sleeping on Ryan's shoulder. Blood covered him fully, clearly having come from the body across their entwined legs. They had arms around each other, tight even in sleep. It was clear Ryan had been beaten in the face and Jeremy’s face was tear swollen.

Alex was behind Geoff and stopped the other two from coming in and making noise. Instead they were sent to prepare two cremations as the gents entered the basement and together, moved the body in the chair out to be prepared for funeral. They weren’t normally fussed on giving funerals to traitors but it seemed the state Jeremy was in, he’d appreciate it.

The two killers were so out of it, that even though the gents worked as quietly as they could, they didn’t stir, not even when the body across their legs was carried away.

 

Ryan couldn’t believe how deeply he had allowed himself to sleep when Geoff woke him with a cautious hand. He bared his teeth, clutching Jeremy tighter before he realised whose face was hovering by his. Jeremy didn’t even twitch and only the feel of his heart beating against Ryan's chest assured him the Lad hadn’t died of his grief.

“What happened?” Geoff asked softly and Ryan nodded up towards the bench. There, hidden behind the tin filled with stink and things Geoff would rather not look at was Ryan's phone, having died in its recording position. Geoff pocketed it to Ryan assuring him softly, “Jeremy is loyal to us now. Only to us. He’s mine.”

 

Jeremy came to standing outside in the fresh air. He had been washed down and changed but he had no memory of that. Just that he was staring at two bomb fires, side by side, watching his brothers go up in smoke. He blinked purposely, shifting slightly and finding out he had arms wrapped around his waist and a head resting their chin on his shoulder.

“You back baby?” A voice rumbled in his ear, the pet name odd but somehow welcoming. He looked and meet Ryan's eyes. Ryan gave him that soft loving smile that made his heart pound. He didn’t answer, instead looking around them. Geoff was standing directly beside them, looking to Jeremy curiously and giving his own smile when the lads eyes found his. He placed a hand on the younger mans free shoulder.

“Hey buddy. Don’t worry, we’re square, alls forgiven. You proved who you’ll side with.” Geoff smiled a little wider as Jeremy’s brows pulled together then relaxed at his words. He still said nothing, looking past Geoff to see Alex who was looking to the fire’s. He glanced over once then did a quick double take, waving a crossed hand at him. Jeremy turned to the other side, leaning his head slightly forward to see by Ryan’s head.

Gavin was closet, standing with his hands in his pockets, rocking back and forth on his heels as he watched the fires consume. He looked to Jeremy and gave him a wide cocky grin.

“Still team lads Lil’J?” he asked and didn’t seem to concerned when Jeremy stayed silent. Gavin nudged the hard man beside him, Michael nudging him back harder.

“I can see he’s looking at me moron.” He snarled derisively then meet the gaze directed at him, “You right there Lil’J?” he asked.

“We’re all concerned about you baby. What I tell you? We are the family you need. The family who love you and accept you.” Ryan lifted his head, turning the lad in his arms and pulling him close. Jeremy leant his head against Ryan’s chest, hearing the heartbeat in one ear as well as the soft crinkle of the fire in the other.

One arm stayed wrapped around his waist, Ryan moving the other one up to its place gripping Jeremy’s neck. Geoff's heavy hand fell on his shoulder, then Alex’s giant paw spread over his shoulder blade. He saw Michael step by Gavin and place his hand on the other shoulder. Jeremy looked to Gavin and extended his own hand away from Ryan, inviting the last lad to take it. He did, stepping close, his fingers gripped tight around Jeremy’s.

“You’re one of us Jeremy. Through and through.” Said Geoff.

“You’re a Lad Lil’J, didn’t I tell you, you would be?” Gavin remarked knowingly.

“Proved yourself better then we could have asked. Thank you.” Admired Alex, sure to praise him for his sacrifice.

“If you pull another stunt like that, I’m going to kick your ass. But hey, welcome” Michael put in affectionately.

“Mine. Yours. Ours. You and me Lil’J. Just you and me now with our crew. There is no one and nothing that can separate us now.” Ryan rumbled in his ear, pitched low enough that Jeremy wasn’t sure the others heard it.

“Guys?” He croaked, everyone stepping closer to hear what Jeremy would say.

“Can I get our crew logo tattooed as a crest?” The crew laughed, Jeremy pulling back from Ryan to look around, smiling. His old family were dead and gone. He had loved them and would miss them sure. But his future didn’t lay in playing happy families with his brothers. It lay in fire and destruction, bullets and knives, money and fast cars. It lay with these men, all as twisted and demented as himself.

Jeremy had too much blood on his hands, had to big a craving for more to go back. It was always too late, even before the first time Ryan had guided him into killing. He had already become emptied of feeling, of true human responses. Ryan, the light he had showed him and the life he lead here with his crew had showed him how to fill it up.

Trevor and Matt took another chunk with them as they became ash, but Jeremy knew, saw it in the faces surrounding him, firelight in all their eyes. That the Fake AH crew would soon fill that emptiness inside him with sweet golden deaths in the name of power and money...

He was broken but in this company, he was whole.

 

 

 

 

 

-The knock at the door surprised him. No one should know where he lives. He was a shadow, a mystery, an enigma. He grabbed his white mask, tying it across his eyes as he got up from the couch, cheeto packets crinkling down into the mess of take away containers and soft drink strewn about the floor. The game was paused and the heavy smell of smoke was fixed to his purple hoodie.

Another knock as he leant over his computer where it was set up in the corner. He clicked to the security feed for right outside his door and sighed, recognising the man stood in front of it. What a hassle. He went to the door, opening it wide, the old wound where a bullet had passed through his shoulder blade aching. He leant against the open door, head cocked at the detective standing before him.

“Look, I already told you everything I know.” He said bored, “I don’t appreciate you getting all up in my digs either my man.” The tall broad shouldered man, rolled his eyes and his shoulders, looking up and down the hall.

“You gonna let me in wanker?” said a deep voice with a British accent.

“I got a choice? Shit, later dude.” Said the masked guy who tried to swing the door shut. The detective stuck his foot in then barged past, mask lifting his arms in a large sigh.

“Sure, come in, have a seat.” He muttered sarcastic as the detective turned towards him.

“You didn’t tell me everything when I help you out did you?” he got right to the point and the guy shrugged, not caring about the angry tone directed at him. Not really caring about anything.

“I warned you I wouldn’t turn my old crew in. What I did give you however was enough to earn you that pretty badge so on the whole I’d say were square.”

“stop taking the piss. He works with your old crew. Has done since before you left.” The mask sighed heavily again, walking by and flopping down on his couch, the angry detective following him and blocking the view to the TV with folded arm, glaring down at the apathetic guy below him.

“Ok, what? Your playing the pronoun game and I’d like to play my game so spit it out already.”

The man growled, slipping a hand into his jacket pocket to produce a photo. A tall, dark blonde man with a large nose grinning as he escorted a woman on his arm from a night club.

“Word is, the Fake AH crew took care of a bounty on one of their own. A Gavino free, hacker extraordinaire. He worked with you before you came crawling to me Ray, you should have told me.”

Ray shrugged gesturing wide with his controller falling from his fingers once more.

“Ok, hey Dan, I know your just the informant on a few hits I’ve done, and we don’t know each other very well, but fancy patching me up and declaring me dead so I can flee Los Santos and my old crew. Oh by the way, Your dear little baby brother Gavvey wavey Gruchy, who I totally didn’t know was your brother for ages, is alive and well and killing more people then I can count.” He smirked up at Dan who was positively fuming, his rage sliding of Ray like water off a ducks back.

“But yeah man. I should have told you straight away. Your right, my bad. Now can you move? I was in the middle of a wave.”-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So first things first, big thanks to my commenter’s, Libbybell, you followed this from other works and been along the whole ride, giving me ideas and feed back, it was great! ;)  
> Gangly limbs, who also has been along the whole ride, even when busy taking time to comment, loved your reactions dude and also gave some suggestions  
> OokamiTenshi, always fun to read your comments with it’s little emoticons and reactions  
> Your my main three, almost commenting on every chapter and that more then anything kept me writing even when blocked.  
> Everyone else who commented, Talore, SarahElizabeth, Flynn, Diana, AllisMalice, Daggerstar, omni_slasher8o thank you so much, I adore feedback especially when it’s pretty positive I was so glad you liked it  
> Edarull, you found us a little already in but your comments through the last few had me determined to round it out as quickly as it would come to me   
> Xanzs, I feel really bad about everything but hey... forgive me now right? HE LIVES!!  
> THANK YOU to all my Kudosers too and anyone who silently followed along! I hope this end satisfies as well as entertained you! I will continue with this universe but I think it’ll be a series rather then piling more chapters into this one. Most likely starting with the Dan arc but maybe not, I do have a few different ideas so we’ll see. Until the next time guys! Enjoy!

**Author's Note:**

> Please comment and kudos as the mood takes you. Not sure how often i'll be updating or even where this is going. It's just demanding to be told so here it is :)

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Broken But Working Playlist](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8560057) by [ValerieMichaelis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ValerieMichaelis/pseuds/ValerieMichaelis)




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